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"So then, I was in the car and Derek brings him outside and the whole time Isaac is staring into my face and it was crazy."
"That's so cute. Maybe you can get back together," Allison says in reply from the story I just told her. This bitch.
"We were never dating!" I shout and flick her in between her eyes. I hate annoying people. I don't know what's wrong with me but seeing Isaac like that was like me punching a baby. He's innocent and he hasn't done anything to anyone. I just feel terrible. Like when I almost killed Scott. I don't know, I'm just going through this thing. I want to finish what Kate started but I don't even know what Kate started. What she wants is unknown to me. Peter even said I'm on the road to destruction, on the path to be just like Kate.
"Kate is dead. And no one is asking you to try to kill every single wolf that exists. That's not our job. Whoever threatens our friends and family are the ones that we go after. Isaac is harmless. You're going to go crazy and get yourself killed trying to live up to the ridiculous standards you set for something you don't understand. Make a promise with me, we work together, as sisters, and we don't get behind each other's backs and against each other ever."
Well damn, never thought my baby sister would make more sense than me.
"Somewhat like that. I promise we'll never go against each other and I won't try to kill every wolf." My promises mean nothing. Even at this moment I know I'll probably kill someone. If I was a wolf, I'd probably be the most dangerous wolf alive. Cross me and I will put you through hell. Now I want to be a wolf.
"Fair enough. Now let's talk about Isaac and how you're so in loooooveeee," she exclaims and I hit her with a pillow and shake my head. She hits me back with a notebook. If she had a b in her name, it would be for bitch. But now I'm going to grab this pillow and enjoy a perfectly cliche pillow fight with my sister.
WHY IS SOME CRAZY SHIT ALWAYS HAPPENING TO ME?
I've been taking a lot of night drives and walks lately and tonight I decided to to get some chicken, not a big deal. So there I was, got my chicken, ate, and then I was like, 'oh shit! I need gas!' So I drive to the gas station to get me some gas.
I saw this creepy guy but whatever. He left and the lights turned off. I didn't know what the fuck happened but I was getting the fuck out of there. So I took the pump out of my car and got in the driver's seat. Guess what? No keys. Now, I know I left my keys in the car. I had to get out the car and find them. I'm thinking Michael Myers is out here or something. I hear someone jingling keys like they want to taunt me.
I will never fight Michael Myers but it's unlikely it's him, so I pull out my blade and wait for someone to come up to me. AND I GET KIDNAPPED.
I just came to my senses and some guy pulled the black bag off of my head. First thing I did was observe my sorroundings, I noticed I was in the Hale house right away. Directly in front of me was my father, sitting strapped to a chair. Now I'm even more confused. We're both tied to chairs the same way. I'm not really scared because it's MY DAD he's Chris Argent. Duh.
What if Isaac or Derek is getting revenge? I will fuck Derek up. And Isaac. I was kind of hoping to see him again. Only to let him now I was being a fool two days ago and afterwards hurt him. Plus, I need my ring. Never got that back.
Where's Allison? She'd probably experience a heart attack out if she knew I was here. I would freak out but there's no point. I already tried getting out. I don't really panic under pressure, I think. OK maybe sometimes.
"Wonder what happens when a hunter gets bit? Jocelyn, ever wonder what happens if you get bit? What do you think your father would do?" I peer up as some creepy, disembodied voice comes from nowhere. I stare at my dad who's really struggling. I never thought of that. Oh, what if Derek is going to bite me?
"What do you think he'll need to do?" This ominous voice is really annoying me. I'm uncomfortable and the fact that my dad cannot get out is bothering me so I start struggling in my chair, too.
I jump as my dad breaks his chair IN HALF. I start nodding and wait for him to come over here and untie me.
A guy in a hoodie walks up behind my dad and I start screaming as best I can with this gag in my mouth. All he does is give my dad an iPhone and my dad shows me the ominous voice is just a stupid recording. I roll my eyes at his annoying ass.
The hoodie guy is really creepy guy from the gas station. Creepy dude shall forever be his name.
"Everything changes with one bite," my dad says, now calm and on his feet like he didn't just break a chair in half. Sorry I don't remember when he became the hulk. Slowly, he walks over and takes my makeshift gag out of my mouth
"Why the fuck am I still tied up?" I basically growl out at him.
"Watch your mouth. Your official training begins now. Do you know what happens when a hunter hesitates?" He asks that and I immediately know he's referring to the fact that I didn't kill Isaac because I'm stupid as fuck.
"Allison shot your guy. It wasn't my job."
"I know, it was with this arrow," he says and shows me her arrow... Ok...? "You could've died! You could've been bit! Why is Isaac alive?"
"He's innocent! If you're going to kill a 16-year-old boy, you're going to kill Scott for fucking your daughters brains out!" I shout, smiling at his anger. My dad won't hit me and being tied to a chair is punishment enough so I'm honestly just saying whatever.
"Isaac is going to die when we find him next full moon."
"Sure, if you want me to decapitate Scott on Allison's bed," I say and then smile even more. That sounds fun. Very fun.
"Killing Isaac is a tough choice we had to make," my dad says to me. I'm sure he's completely fed up with my bullshit right about now and if I was him, I would be too. But I'm me and Jocelyn never quits.
"His eyes weren't even blue! You don't want to kill him, Gerard does!"
"No- see, our family has a surprisingly progressive tradition. Knowing most wars and violence are started by men, we leave the really tough decisions with the woman," my dad comes over and whispers in my ear. My evil ass mother? Then I'll throw Scott's head at her, I guess.
"Our sons are trained to be soldiers and our daughters are the leaders," he puts the arrow in my hand and walks to the side of me. What? Oh no, no, no. I'm not about to do this shit. He plants a kiss on my forehead and then walks away saying, "your training starts now. Timer."
Creepy guy starts the timer and leaves. This bitch. Fuck that, I'm not sitting here trying to cut a rope with this tiny ass arrowhead. I glance around and see my dad's broken chair. OK. Whatever.
I swing my chair back and it takes me like five minutes to just roll over there and get into position. I grab a piece of wood and use the floor to help me break it off of the chair. It's not the leg but it's big enough.
It hurts like hell and I scream profanities non stop, but I stick the piece of wood in-between my hand and the rope. The back of my wrist has marks and its bloody but it's loose. I untie my feet before realizing I can't untie knots with one hand, especially when they're behind my back. Great. That's what they should teach me, not lock me in a room.
I awkwardly walk with the chair on my back to where I dropped the arrow. Time to saw away. Yaaaaaaayyyyyyyy...
I ran outside a long while later, not sure how many times I rapped 50 Cent and Eminem lyrics to myself. It was the most boring time of my life and I wish I would've had a book to read while I did it, anyway.
Creepy guy and Allison were standing there, waiting for me beside my car. "Congrats," he says, showing me my time.
"I'm bleeding and it took me a whole hour and twenty minutes," I say, grabbing my car keys from my sister.
"Why are you even here?" I ask Allison who has the biggest and most annoying smile.
"I did mines yesterday and don't worry, you did way better. It took me two hours and a half," she explains. Way to boost my ego.
"Took me three," creep says and I smile even wider than I already was. I put my hand under my chin for a second and then open my car door.
Allison says bye to creep guy and then gets in my passenger seat. Ah, it's nice to not be tied up. Especially if you're not my boyfriend. Then you should never tie me up...I never said I like to be tied up.
I didn't wake up in a good mood, I got in the shower and wasted a whole hour standing under the water. I left my hair to air dry and be wavy.
Even though I wasn't in the mood, today was another dressy day for me, but I didn't wear a skater skirt for once, just regular ripped jeans but my top was super revealing; the whole thing was a purple lace up tee so there was cleavage galore and I wasn't wearing a jacket. My dramatic make up makes it seem like I could be going out to a club or something, but my black flats kind of kill that vibe.
Either way, in school there was way too many boys staring and trying to talk to me. I hate boys now, I don't know why they just aren't as fun because just yesterday I was enjoying them flirting with me.
I actually had a pretty good day being lonely and Stiles not loving me anymore. I wrote a note so I could remember I'm not Allison and I'm not soft because I swear I think I am. It was on my special notebook and it read, 'I am an Argent. I hunt werewolves. The woman of our family are born to be leaders, the men soldiers. I will be one. Unlike Allison, who has a werewolf boyfriend. I will kill werewolves with either my katana, throwing knives, bow and arrow or gun. That's what I was born to do.'
I took all day to write it down because I have the least creative brain ever. I think I'm all brawn and beauty and like a little brain but only if it's backing up my brawn. I just have a good survival instinct and stuff. Whateverz?
Stiles is way more into Lydia now that I'm not into him that much. Sure, we can flirt, but nothing is the same. Something's different. With me, not him. His smile, his eyes, his everything that I used to fall for is no longer appealing to me. I'm not even sure about what I'm into anymore. No cute boys get me excited- not the dirty type for dirty minded freaks -but the cute guys aren't even cute.
When gym class rolled around, I had totally forgotten to bring clothes. Luckily, I had period tights in my locker. Those backup pants that I've never even used actually did come in handy. I also had a white crop tee in my book bag for some reason so that worked great. Apparently no one cares if you wear crop tops in gym.
I honestly enjoy rock climbing and I'm kind of the best at it. After four people, coach wouldn't let me race anyone anymore and called Allison and Scott to climb. They were talking and flirting and obviously taking way too long. JUST CLIMB THE WALL ASSHOLES!
Scott eventually falls and I die laughing because I obviously enjoy his pain and suffering. Stiles and this epileptic girl, Erica are up next. I'm not sure why she's climbing the wall but if coach says to then whatever.
She starts panicking about halfway up the wall but of course the crackhead of the coach is asking stupid questions like is she dizzy. Sometimes he makes me want to kill myself just so I never have to hear him again. Anyway, I'm not paying attention to Erica, I'm talking to this boy who thinks he has a chance. He's asking about my belly ring and my tongue ring all while leaving dirty hints. No, you're ridiculous if you think you have a chance. JUST BECAUSE I WAS WITH STILES DOESN'T MEAN I HAVE LOW STANDARDS!
People start laughing and I notice Erica jumping off the wall in a panic. She looks like she's about to cry and I really hate people.
I start yelling and everyone should have an idea of what I said. "Fuck you ASSHOLES! You're laughing at her when you're all ugly hoes and pathetic bitch ass fuckboys!"
So I got sent to the principals office. It was an awkward talk with my grandpa but I obviously didn't get in trouble so yay fucking me!
I had to go to the gym, shower, then change. While I was in the shower, Erica decided to climb the wall with no mat or suspenders to help her out. She had a seizure and Scott saved her (Allison told me this) and that basically means I saved her because if it wasn't for me, Scott would be dead and she would also be dead.
We had lunch after gym and I was sitting with Scott and Stiles. They're going to the ice rink and Stiles asked if I wanted to go. I decided I didn't want to hang out and he's taking the next set of tits, Lydia.
Then some girl walked in. She was blonde and looked like the mother of all sluts decided to come to highschool. She had bigger boobs than me but I don't really care. Lydia's mad, I'm mad, every girl is mad and I don't even know what to say. WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO THAT ACNE FACED, NAPPY HAIRED, EPILEPTIC GIRL FROM EARLIER?!
Scott and Stiles run out after Erica and that's when I know something's definitely up. I need to go to the bathroom. Just to regain confidence and Lydia joins me.
"Is she prettier than me?" Lydia asks and I scoff.
"She's not prettier than either than us. That cake face will melt away if we threw water on her," I say to Lydia as she fixes her hair. She nods and looks at me through the mirror.
"She doesn't got as much ass as either of us neither," Lydia says and I turn to examine my body from the side.
"I don't have an ass, do I?"
"Yeah, it's one of those butts where you're skinny so it looks big. I have a naturally big butt, though," Lydia replies. Lydia is the type to compliment you and then try to one-up you. I'm used to it by now.
"I wish my butt was bigger," I say, still examining myself.
"No, you are fine as you are. You're oozing with sex appeal, especially now that you have those piercings. I would get them but I don't want to mess any part of my body up and look ugly," she says and then grabs her purse.
Did she just insult me, or compliment me? Lydia really does confuse me most of the time.
"Are you coming?" She grabs my attention and I nod my head, grabbing my own purse and following her out of the bathroom. OK then.
When we went home later, we all went into Allison's room and while Lydia and Allison made small talk, I was thinking of Erica. She has to be a wolf. Great, another wolf. Derek must've turned her but why is he only going after teenagers? He's going after broken ones. Isaac- he was getting abused. Erica- she has epilepsy. Who could be next?
My dad gets my attention by knocking on Allison's door frame and asking, "heading out?" I was still in the outfit I wore when I was in school. Lydia had asked me to come, only because she didn't want to be alone with Stiles. She doesn't like Stiles and its obviously only because she's in love with Jackson even though they aren't together. I've already told Stiles multiple times that we are not getting together and I probably lead him on because half of the day I'm calling him hot and flirting.
I'm probably not going to stay at the ice rink for even an hour because I don't even like ice skating. I like roller skating but only because it's easier and less cold, but that's my opinion. Like how much I hate hoes. Like Erica. She's a wolf so technically I can kill her now. Right now my only goal is to use my sword on a real living thing. I haven't shot anyone since Derek and Scott and it's really bothering me now that I realize that I like shooting people.
I think I'm gonna go hunting and shoot a turkey and then leave it in the kitchen counter to freak my mom out. That seems fun. Wait, What?
Lydia invited me to come take a selfie and we end up taking 20+ like the conceited bitches we are. After each one we just talk about how good we look. It's coming...#selfienation
That felt good.
I was skating for a while but it wasn't fun, I didn't feel like I was fourth wheeling that much, I was still alone and annoyed. My whole life I've been independent and now I feel lonely. So many crazy things have been happening.
I leave after a bit and drive to Isaac's house, even though it was unintentional. I was just driving around and stopped there.
I don't remember when I just sat and cried for no reason. It's when nothing happened to you but your emotions just pile up and you just want to cry. That's what I need to do. My life has become this big crazy thing. I've always been alone and I use anger to hide all my feelings, I get that, but I've never seen myself as broken. Oddly enough, that's how I feel now with all this hurt and confusion. I can see it now. I have no idea what I have to do. Why I have to do it all alone.
The first tear rolls down my cheek and I bury my face. No one is here but I'm not the type to just cry out loud in front of everyone. Sometimes a girl breaks. Noooooo. Who I am doesn't allow me to sit and cry. I'm Jocelyn Argent. Not just a regular girl.
I wipe my tear stained cheeks, looking up and seeing a pair of golden eyes watching me and a male silhouette. Jocelyn Argent.
I reach behind me into my backseat and feel around on the floor until I grab my katana. Luckily we never take my car anywhere.
When I turn back around and look through my windshield, the glowing eyes are gone it's just me. I am not crazy.
"Come on!" I yell as soon as I get out of my car. I probably do look crazy to anyone looking out their windows. Young girl with a katana in her hand screaming into the darkness.
I yell again and this time whip my body around. Nothing.
After a minute I lean back onto my car and run a hand through my hair. What is wrong with me? Something has really got me fucked up.
Or someone.
4:09pm 2/11/17
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