A/N Thanks as always goes to my wonderful beta, MissAlex. There are three people keeping this fic going, you know who you are - I bow down to you all :)

So, I'm a little nervous posting this chapter. I hope you like it. Please concider C&P'ing the following link. Every year over 200,000 children worldwide are diagnosed with a form of childhood cancer. Do your bit to help the fandom give back http://www(dot)thefandomgivesback(dot)com/

Chapter Thirteen:

Good Morning Spider

Jasper

Solitary - again.

Letting out a deep sigh, I turned onto my side and froze when I spotted a spider crawling up the thinly padded wall. My wide eyes did not leave the creature's fat, hairy abdomen as its long legs propelled it towards the ceiling. Exhaling a shaky breath, I felt a drop of sweat running from my temple down along the side of my face.

I hated spiders. Actually, I was terrified of them. As I studied my solitary cell mate, I was relieved that it headed in the direction opposite of where I lay. If it had come towards me, trussed as I was, there would be nothing I could do to stop it from crawling on my face - my worst nightmare. I shuddered and tried to shuffle my body further away from the wall. It was difficult without the use of my arms, which were tied behind my back by a strange white jacket.

My eyes had long since adjusted to the dim radiance of the room. I'd been in here for a few hours already, I guessed. The only light source shone through the letterbox sized hole in the door, the same hole that my breakfast tray would be posted through in the morning. I remembered that from my previous visits. It wasn't quite dark yet but the small room was bathed in the husky glow of the poorly lit lights in the corridor.

Why did I always find myself inside this cell?

It was worse than usual since my arms were bound. I was just lucky they didn't strap my ankles together as well. I wiggled my shoulders against the restriction, but I soon gave up. I was still feeling groggy from the sedative they'd injected into my arm earlier when they captured me outside on my way to save Alice.

Alice.

There was a fucking spider in my cell, it was cold, damp and dark, and all I wanted to do was get out of here so I could find out if she was alright.

I hated it here.

As I breathed in deeply, a sharp pain radiated down my nose. I figured it was swollen from my struggle with the guards.

My mind roamed to Alice again.

I moved from my side onto my back, using my restraint-free legs to push my body up off the floor. With little difficulty, I managed to get myself into a sitting position with my back up against the wall. I let out a laboured breath and rested my head upon its cold surface, looking up, just to make sure that the spider had not suddenly decided to descend.

The arachnid was still far enough away from me, continuing its journey upwards, so I was safe - for now.

Thoughts of Alice consumed my consciousness and I hoped with all of my heart that she was okay. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if anything bad happened to her and I'd not been able to prevent it.

Out in the garden, Laurent was angry, but so was Alice. What surprised me was that she stood up to him. I didn't know whether that was a good thing or a bad thing, and I wouldn't know until I saw her again.

It was comforting that she wasn't afraid to confront him, but at the same time, she didn't know that he was not human. She was up against a creature so strong that she didn't have a chance of survival if he went after her. My spider companion in this cell now seemed like a less adverse opponent when compared to Laurent and I cursed myself for fearing it when there was a more dangerous enemy on the loose.

God, I was tired. My mouth felt dry and thick with thirst, and my throat felt raw from shouting for Alice earlier. My struggle with the guards, compounded with my violent run-in with Laurent earlier in the hall, made me a downright mess. Every part of my body ached.

I needed some sleep, and I needed Alice, but both were unattainable right now. My nose began to tickle so I turned my head towards the wall, my cheek flat against the soft pads, and moved my head up and down, generating enough friction to scratch the itch.

Once it disappeared, I turned my head away from the wall and closed my eyes, wondering how long I would be locked in here this time. The blood-sucking vampire was usually directly responsible for the majority of my stays in solitary confinement, but this time, I had no one to blame but myself. Even without his knowledge, he indirectly succeeded in getting me locked in here. It made me mad that he had such control over me still, even when it wasn't on purpose. I should've had more patience.

That was my life story. Patience was never my forte. If I'd only waited, Alice may have stormed off back into the building and then I could have sought her out.

It made me smile as I recalled Alice's beautiful face as she sat under the oak tree. I replayed the scene in my head, only this time, I added a new spin on things. I thought about her deep red lips, curled into a sneer, as she told Laurent that she belonged to me.

A bitter laugh escaped my lips. I shouldn't daydream about her because it would only get my hopes up for nothing. Alice would never be mine.

I smacked the back of my head against the padded wall, generating nothing more than a dull thud. I struggled against the sluggishness that encompassed my brain, but I didn't want to go to sleep with a spider crawling around or the threat of Laurent finding out I was in here and paying me a visit.

I tilted my head up, locating the spider once more. I was still safe, although it seemed to have changed its course and was now walking across the wall instead of up.

My vision was blurry and I knew I was slowly losing the battle against my exhaustion. My eyelids felt as heavy as lead and I wished I was able to rub my eyes with my hands and clear the haziness away. I growled in frustration, tugging at the white material that wouldn't budge, denying me the freedom I so desperately craved.

I tried to stay awake because my childhood memories were lurking in the corners of my subconscious, waiting for the moment I let go and drifted off, but it was no use. When I finally succumbed to my fatigue, images of my life with The Children of Elijah, danced behind my closed eyelids. I was unable to stop them, as always. My mother's face came into focus and I felt a warmth surrounding my heart. I bathed in the euphoria for a few moments before remembering what she did.

What she did.

My eyes shot open and I stared blankly ahead. Was my mother the victim or the villain? Surely, Melvin, Sonny, and the rest of the children were more the victims in that fucked up mess than her.

The warmth in my heart turned to a dull ache as my thoughts shifted. I thought about my beautiful mother with her straight, golden blond hair that tickled my nose when she leaned over to kiss me goodnight. She always smelled of the scented oils she added to her baths every evening.

Other than my mother, I missed Melvin and Sonny the most. We were like brothers.
We'd lived together in a little religious community for most of my childhood. From the pieces of information I'd gathered in my adult years, I learned that my mother had joined a religious group and moved us to their compound on large farm in Texas, in order to escape the brutal beatings from my biological father.

The group - the Order, as they liked to be called - controlled every aspect of our lives through criticism, psychological games and humiliation. But lucky for me, I didn't remember any of that shit. I was only a young child at the time. When I heard the news reports later on, that's when I learned the truth. They shocked me because I'd always regarded my childhood as happy and perfect. It pained me to know that my mother was so miserable and depressed the entire duration and I'd been oblivious to it all.

The creak of the door to my cell jerked me into a higher state of wakefulness and I watched two aides and a nurse push their way in the tiny room. The nurse stayed at the door, needle in hand, prepared to inject me if I got out of hand. But she wouldn't need it. I was tied up. Even if I used all of my strength, I still wouldn't free myself from this jacket.

I refused to co-operative as the two aides man-handled me to my knees. Surprisingly, they released my arms and removed the white jacket. My upper limbs dangled alongside my body as though they belonged to someone else, the blood rushing through my veins, causing a painful pins and needles sensation to radiate from my shoulders to the tips of my fingers. Nevertheless, it felt good to be free from the restraints.

Without one word spoken, the three of them left my cell, slamming the door and locking it behind them. I raked my fingers through my hair, which was now a tangled mess of dried blood and sweat, and then sat against the wall. The spider was still there, menacingly, its shadow making it look bigger than it actually was. It stretched out a long hairy leg and I shuddered.

I was still tired as hell but I had too many thoughts racing through my head to sleep.

My mother.

I loved and hated her.

Why did she choose to leave me behind if she really believed what she was doing was righteous? Was I not worthy? Didn't I, too, have a place reserved for me in Heaven? Why did she leave me? Whenever I thought about her, those questions always followed.

A single tear fell from my eye down my cheek.

Deo Vindice - God is our Vindicator.

That had been our motto. It was everywhere around the commune. It was even carved above the entranceway of the farm for all to see - a constant reminder that we belonged to Him. We chanted it in prayer, and our father, Elijah, preached it to us during his sermons.

Sitting down on the floor, I shivered as I hugged my knees to my chest. I was cold now without the jacket, and my mind drifted back to my childhood, recalling the memories that I wished would disappear forever.

The night before the tragedy, the twelve elders held an opulent dinner. They sat at a long, wooden table, piled high with food, while the rest of us sat on our prayer-mats on the floor. Elijah walked around delivering our food trays, consisting of smaller portions of a less remarkable variety and we dined in silence. There was a strange feeling in the air that last night. After supper, everybody embraced each other. I know now that they were saying goodbye, or more like see you later until they met up again in the new world.

The next day everyone dressed in the Order's ceremonial robes, which even as a child, I found unusual because we weren't in prayer as was typically the time we wore them. Mothers walked around the crowd handing out wine to everyone, even the children. I recalled as though it was yesterday, Mitch's mother handing me a glass. Just as I lifted it to my mouth, my mother came by and swapped my glass of wine with the one she had on her tray. She gave me a small, sad smile and patted my head before wandering off into the crowd.

I hugged my knees tighter and a sob escaped from my chest as I remembered those last few hours.

People began to take their places, as Elijah said a prayer. The elders lay in a circle on the lounge floor, on their backs, feet together, looking up to the ceiling.

The rest of us found any free space we could. Mother and I were pushed onto our sides, up against the wall, our heads resting upon a soft pillow. Her heavy breaths warmed the back of my neck and if I'd known that was the last time we'd be together, I would have turned around and stared into her adoring eyes, committing as much of her face to my memory as possible.

Later, I'd awoken in a white room, on a white bed, and I thought that I was in Heaven. Even when the doctor arrived and stood by my side, I still believed this to be so because Elijah said we were going to the next world and I'd learned over the years to trust him. But alas, I quickly learned that was not the case.

Opening my eyes, I snapped back into the present, unable to cope with the ache in my heart. I would never understand why my mother left me behind and I would never forgive her for leaving me to deal with the rest of the world on my own.

All the pain and confusion of that day - the day I realized that I was left alone - swept over me like a tidal wave, and my chest felt like it was going to explode. I rolled onto my front and crawled onto my knees, hugging my head with my arms. A low moan began, growing louder as my heart ripped apart.

My moans became cries, and then mournful wails, and I cried my fucking eyes out, right there in that cell.

I fell asleep and when I woke up, my tears had dried. More determined than ever, I sat up. This couldn't go on. I had to move on. Why these memories were haunting me now, when I'd gone years not feeling a thing, confused the hell out of me.

Feeling refreshed after my rest, I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes, wiped away the tear stains, and waited for some food. I was starving. I assumed I'd slept the night and that breakfast would arrive soon. As if on cue, the hatch opened and a pair of eyes peered into my cell.

"Good morning, Jasper. First food, then we'll get you out of here."

We?

I had no idea who was behind the door, but I was grateful. I'd never felt so hungry or so eager for my freedom. Well, at least as much freedom being released from solitary could provide me. I still had the walls of Danvers to contend with. But at least Alice was somewhere inside this institution, I hoped...

I smiled as my breakfast tray slid into my room. I collected it and brought it over to the corner. Danvers' food never tasted so good and I ate with added gusto.

Once I was out, I was going to find Alice. Laurent, be damned. From the corner of my eye, I saw something move along the wall nearest me. My eyes locked with my companion and I felt so happy and rejuvenated that I actually friggn' smiled at the goddamn spider.

"Good morning to you, my eight-legged friend." I grinned as I shoved a mouthful of porridge into my mouth. "Good fucking morning, indeed".

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