As Carlisle headed down the hallway towards Jasper and Alice's room, he was stopped short at the sight of his little girl sitting on the floor outside of his study door with her knees pulled up to her chest and her head bowed. Shocked concern shown clearly on the patriarch's face. He had expected to find her comforting Jasper, not curled on the floor alone.
Flitting to her side, he dropped to his knees next to his princess and gently tipped her head up towards his. To further Carlisle's confusion, his daughter's eyes were twinkling with mirth even though irritation and sorrow was clearly etched on her face.
"Baby, what on earth is going on? Why aren't you with your mate?"
"He ran me out." While her eyes still danced, her voice carried the pang of bitter rejection. "He didn't want me in there with him, Daddy."
"Why would he do that? That doesn't make any sense, Princess."
"You'll see soon enough. All I can say is that he is just being Jazzy."
"Hmm." Carlisle cocked a brow as he looked Alice over. "Are you okay?"
Alice nodded quickly. "Yes, Daddy, but I think I'll go down stairs while you two talk. I'm a bit afraid that it will all be just a little too upsetting even though I know…." She allowed her statement to fade.
"That sounds like an excellent idea, Sweetie. There is no need for you to explain yourself to me."
Getting to his feet, Carlisle reached a hand to Alice and helped her up. Giving her a quick hug, he aimed her at the stairs and sent her on her way with a light swat.
Giving a soft squeak, Alice pranced down the hall before coming to a stop as she glanced back at Carlisle heading towards her bedroom.
"Daddy."
He stopped and looked over his shoulder at his daughter standing near the steps.
Shaking her head, Alice pointed towards the study door.
Carlisle cocked his head to the side as he raised a brow only to be met by a nod from his little girl before she bounded off down the stairs.
Slowly opening the door Carlisle was assaulted by the over powering scent of leather dressing that hung thick in the air. Closing the heavy wooden door behind him with a quiet click, he quickly located the source of the odor.
Laid out on his desk on top of its fabric wrapping was his father's strap, freshly oiled and ready to be put into use. The bottle of dressing and a soiled rag sat next to the wicked implement and beside that was the nearly as intimidating sight of Jasper's own paddle.
His golden eyes flickered from the assembled tools to his son who stood silently in the same corner that Carlisle had placed him in earlier; his hands held locked behind his back and dressed in just his shirt, boxers and socks.
Carlisle rubbed his eyes then ran his hand over his face as he groaned softly.
"Jasper, how did you get into my desk drawer?"
"I borrowed your keys."
"You stole my keys," Carlisle corrected in a stern tone.
"No, Sah. I'll put 'em back right after we're done. Stealing is taking something that you're reckonin' on keepin'. I aint looking ta keep your keys. I just needed ta borrow 'em in the short term."
"And why did you 'borrow' them at all?"
"The way I figure it, I've got the ass whoopin' of several lifetimes a headin' my way. There was no point in tryin' ta make any excuse for my actions, so might as well make things as easy as possible on ya, Sah."
Carlisle rubbed his eyes again as he shook his bowed head before clearing his throat. "Jasper, put your pants back on, son, and then please come join me over on the couch. We seriously need to talk."
"But, Papa…."
"Son, please do as you're told."
Carlisle retreated to the loveseat and sat as Jasper slowly complied with his father's order.
Once Jasper was settled down next to him, the elder drew a steadying breath. "Jasper, there will not be any more whippings here tonight and, for the record, that strap will never be used on you. While I realize that your heart was in the right place, I don't appreciate you acquiring my keys and invading my privacy. That is not to happen again."
Jasper hung his head and nodded. "Sorry, Sah."
As he leaned back against the soft leather cushion, a wave of nervousness flooded Carlisle's system before receding just as quickly. Patting the boy's knee lightly, the elder gave Jasper what he hoped was a reassuring smile. "It's alright, Jazz. This will all work out though not in the way you apparently thought that it would."
With a tap beneath his son's jaw, Carlisle encouraged the solider to meet his eyes. "I've done a great deal of thinking, Jasper and I can only hope that you took some of this time to reflect on your actions as well."
"I have." Jasper glanced away nervously before adding, "Papa, is it true that he wasn't abusing Amanda; that it was honestly an accident?"
Carlisle nodded. "It does look that way."
Jasper's head drooped. "Then I nearly killed an innocent man and by following through with that I would have put his family through hell as well."
The doctor chose to remain silent to afford Jasper's conscience the chance to reprimand him as the guilt which he had brought upon himself blossomed.
When he realized that no rebuke was forthcoming, Jasper hazarded a glance at his father. "Then why am I not being punished this time when I have been before? If there was ever a time that I deserved ta be soundly thrashed, this would be it. I don't understand, Papa."
Carlisle cleared his throat and drew a breath as he considered his response carefully. "Jasper, how is your backside right now?"
"A bit tender."
"And yet it had no effect in regards to stopping you from hunting down Mr. Hayford, did it?"
Jasper quickly looked away with a mumbled, "I guess not."
"There is no guessing about it, Son. All of my lecturing and a thoroughly tanned posterior did not have the desired effect on your behavior." Carlisle ran his hand through his hair in an attempt to keep himself calm. "It breaks my heart to see you in pain, Jasper and knowing that I am the cause is damn near unbearable. If it's not teaching you to amend your behavior, if it is not serving as a deterrent…." The elder reached out and turned his son's face back towards his, forcing himself to look into his son's eyes as he spoke slowly and clearly. "If it is not serving its intended purpose, then I am doing nothing more than abusing you."
Shock registered in Jasper's dark eyes. "That's ridiculous, Papa."
"Is it? I haven't taught you to control yourself so it seems that all I was doing was venting my frustration on your behind." Carlisle folded his arms over his chest as he studied his son carefully.
"That's not true. You were doing your best to show me why I was wrong. It's not your fault that I have too much of the stubborn jackass in me to listen."
"My intentions do not change the fact that my methods did not work this time. I should have altered my approach sooner. Perhaps we wouldn't be in this situation if I had and you would have been spared at least a bit of needless physical discomfort."
"But I deserved to be punished, Papa. I did then and I still do now." Jasper swallowed at the lump that had formed in his throat. "If there are no consequences for my actions, what's to stop Edward or Emmett or Rosalie from trying something equally as stupid? That's why we have consequences to answer to for breaking the rules. It's to teach us, but it also serves as a warning to the other members of the cov…." He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply before glancing back at his father. "Allow me to serve as an example for the rest of the family. I know I was wrong and I know that my behavior was intolerable. I am willing to accept the consequences. I brought this on myself, Papa. It's no one's fault, but my own."
Bringing his balled up fist up against his lips, Carlisle battled with the desire to abandon his plan and just pull his brave intuitive son into his arms and never let him go. Clearing his throat, he nodded slightly then let his arm drop back across his chest.
"Jasper, you are still facing punishment. That was never in question. The question was what form that discipline should take." Carlisle swallowed hard as he struggled to form the words. "Son, since nothing else appears to have gotten through to you and because this gross disobedience has put the family in jeopardy, I feel that it is in the best interest of all concerned that you spend the next two months in Denali."
The silence that followed the patriarch's declaration was deafening; broken only by Carlisle's shallow halted breathing.
Several minutes passed as Jasper stared at his father with stunned disbelief. "You're…you're sending me away? You're banishing me from the coven? Ostracizing me from my family? I'm to become an outcast?"
The quiet hurt tone of Jasper's voice brought tears to Carlisle's eyes which he attempted to hide by quickly standing and walking toward the window as he pinched the bridge of his nose to brush the tears away. Unable to meet his son's accusing eyes for the moment, Carlisle stared out into the darkness as he shook his head.
"It's not like that, Son. You are most certainly not an outcast."
"But I am… or I will be." Jasper got to his feet and approached his father. Placing his hand against the older man's shoulder, he forced Carlisle to turn and look at him. "You are throwing me out of the only home I've ever really known since…." He bowed his head for a moment then glanced back up with fire in his onyx eyes. "You're jettisoning me like some worthless bit of refuse that's mucking up the place."
"I am taking you to stay with your extended family for a short period of time. It is meant to give you a chance to reevaluate your actions and your place in this family. You will never be cast out, Jasper. You always have a home here; a home with a family who loves you regardless of what happens, but you of all people should realize that I have a duty to keep the family safe. When you became a threat, you left me with no other choice but to act."
"And Alice? Is she to be a pariah as well? You're just going to toss her out, too?" The soldier's eyes narrowed as he spat his words out at his leader.
"No one is becoming a pariah, Jasper, but to answer your question; no. Alice will remain behind. You need this time for yourself to do some soul searching. Your mate will not be joining you in that quest."
Jasper's face fell as his eyes grew wide with disbelief and anguish. Had he been human, Carlisle knew his son's features would have blanched white as the words registered in his mind.
"She knows this? She agreed to go along with it?"
"Reluctantly, but yes she did. She wants what is best for you and knows that this is what you need most right now."
Jasper turned away from Carlisle as his chest constricted with grief.
"Son, please try to understand." Carlisle placed his hand against the boy's back but at his touch Jasper spun around towards him with a loud snarl while knocking his father's hand away.
"Don't you dare call me son. You're no father to me. A real father would never reject and torture his offspring like this."
Carlisle felt his temper flare at Jasper's hurtful words, but managed to retain his carefully crafted expression of calm. He doesn't know what he's saying. He'll come to understand. He just needs time.
"You've poisoned my mate's mind against me. I don't know how you've managed to do that, but I know that she would never abandon me of her own free will."
"Jasper, you are not being abandoned. You are and always will be a member of this family. Even if you don't want me as a father, you are still a son to me; you are a Cullen in every sense of the word."
"If this is what passes for Cullen loyalty, I have no interest in being a Cullen," he sneered scathingly.
Carlisle closed his eyes for a few seconds before taking a breath to ward off the pain and rage that was building in his chest, then spoke softly, "As you wish, Jasper, though that doesn't stop me from loving you and it never will."
"You don't know the meaning of the word, Carlisle." Jasper glared at the older man as a growl rolled in his chest.
Hooking his finger through the leather lacings of his wrist cuff, he snapped the thin strips and yanked the wide band from his arm. "Here!" He tossed the cuff that bore the Cullen crest down at Carlisle's feet. "A worthless flea bitten stray doesn't deserve to wear a collar like some pampered pet. It's not like I belong anywhere anyway so there sure as hell is no need for an identifying marker."
Carlisle swallowed hard as he refrained from even looking at the discarded leather band.
"Are we done here, Carlisle?"
"Yes, Jasper. Our discussion appears to be complete."
"Fine. Then I guess I'll just go pack my things. I take it that you'll be putting me on a plane come morning."
"No. We'll be driving up after we go by the hospital and take care of a few things. I promised Amanda that she would get to see you before she went home."
"Well, at least I can prevent you from letting her down." He bared his teeth slightly before turning his back on his coven leader. "I'll be in my room packing, if anyone in this worthless excuse for a coven has need of me."
Carlisle stood and mutely watched as his son stalked towards the door, yanked it open and then slammed it shut behind with enough force to cause the frame to splinter.
"That went well," the elder quipped bitterly.
Bending down, Carlisle scooped up the leather band and turned it over in his hand as he sighed sadly. The scent of his son radiated from the smooth brown hide as he balled it up in his hand and brought it close to his face. The anger that he had felt during Jasper's outburst was rapidly fading after his son's departure and now all that was left behind was his own crippling grief and regret.
Carlisle returned to the couch and lay down as he curled up with his son's cuff still clutched tightly in his hand. "What have I done? Oh dear Lord, please let this have been the right choice. At least he will still be around family who will care for him. It's not like I've abandoned him out on his own or delivered him into the hands of strangers. Why can't he see that right now?"
With a shake of his head he groaned softly. "It's not that he can't, it's that he won't. He feels betrayed. I can only hope that this is something that he will be able to accept in time and learn to forgive me." The venom tears returned to Carlisle's eyes, but this time he did nothing to impede their flow. What if he never does get over it? What if he starts to blame Alice for going along with me? Surely he wouldn't go that far. Jasper doesn't have it in him to be that cruel.
A light tap on the door interrupted Carlisle's thoughts.
"Come."
With some effort, Esme forced the door open then stepped in before glancing back up at the splintered frame.
"I'll fix it tomorrow or the next day. It will hold until then," Carlisle muttered from his place on the couch.
"And you? How are you holding up?"
"I can honestly say that I have been better."
Esme let the door remain cracked open as she went to her mate and knelt down next to him. Gently she stroked his hair as she sighed. "Alice sent me to check on you, not that she really needed to. Right now she is trying to calm Jasper down."
"I assume that you heard?"
She nodded. "The entire household did."
Carlisle closed his eyes and turned away from his mate as well as the limited space on the small couch would afford. "I take it that the others side with Jasper in this. I can only assume that they see me as an unreasonable monster that has ousted his child as soon as he found himself in an unfavorable position. They probably won't even be able to bear to look at me anymore. Honestly, I'm surprised that you can."
"Don't be too quick to judge your children, Carlisle Cullen and don't ever presume to judge me in matters pertaining to you. The boys are a bit shocked with it all, but Rosalie wants a piece of Major Whitlock in the worst way possible. She was appalled by how he spoke to you and had to be restrained to keep from becoming involved herself. Right now, she and Emmett are out hunting. I felt it best that she work off some of that aggression before she does something that she may come to regret."
"And Edward?"
"He went to take a walk along the river. He is his father's son after all. The idea was that he would be able to think more clearly away from the turmoil of the house, but he wanted you to know that he is staying within ear shot in case he is needed." Esme brushed Carlisle's hair out of his eyes noting how pitch black they had become. "He also asked me to convey his apologies for interfering. Your son will be ready to discuss his indiscretions with you once you are feeling up to it. Edward didn't want to put any more stress on you, but he said that he did see where he was wrong and accepts that punishment is due."
"Somehow, that doesn't seem like quite the pressing matter at the moment."
"Which is why he added that 'when he's up to it' bit. They all understand what kind of toll this is taking on you, Carlisle and are each trying to find some way to help see you through." Esme inhaled deeply. "And I'm sorry that I wasn't more supportive."
Carlisle rolled back over to face his mate and reached out to gently brush her cheek. "There is nothing to be sorry about, my heart. I don't expect us to always agree. I will always welcome your opinion even when it's not one that I share. It is better for me to be shown how situations appear to others. That is the only way that I can know that I have carefully weighed all of my options."
Seeing the sadness swirling in the inky depths of his eyes, Esme shook her head. "I still don't agree with you, Carlisle, but I do believe in what you said and I want you to do the same."
"I said a lot of things tonight, darling. I'm afraid that you're going to have to be a bit more specific."
"I heard you questioning yourself and Jasper's ability to overcome this before I came in. You asked me to have faith, and I do. Now I am asking you to trust that your son will recognize the error in his words. He will forgive you Carlisle, just as I know that you will forgive him."
"I already have forgiven him, Esme, but it still hurts."
"I know it does, lover and I'm certain that Jasper is hurting just as much." Leaning over she kissed his cheek. "We are a family; every one of us draws strength from that fact. Jasper instinctively knows that he is going to need to rely on that strength and should he try to ignore that fact or forget it, he has Alice to remind him. Your daughter knows how to get through to her mate so that is someone else in whom you need to place your faith."
Carlisle gave his wife a weak smile. "I never doubt a single one of my girls. My faith in their indomitable wisdom and abilities will never falter."
"See to it that it doesn't, Carlisle and know that we all share the same unshakable faith in you."
AN: I hope that this made sense and that it reasonably satisfies expectations. Carlisle can feel that he is wrong, but I cannot allow him to be wrong in this story. I'm sorry, guys, I did my best to try to reason it out and I couldn't. He has put a great deal of thought into this decision and even discussed it with a neutral party to make sure that what he is doing is in the best interest of all concerned. Eleazar will explain it all to Jasper much better once the cold of Alaska cools off my little hot headed southern boy. Right now he really isn't in a state of mind to listen to anyone except maybe Alice.
Thank you all for your reviews, suggestions, pms, and just sharing your views. I seriously appreciate it all. I think it's absolutely awesome that y'all are willing to read my rambling madness.
Special takes to my wonderfully patient proofreader, Splinter. I simply couldn't get by without her. *hugs*
