"Return to Paradise Trail" PART FOURTEEN
Charlotte couldn't stop those words from reeling within her mind that night as she curled the covers to her chin, gently drifting to sleep in the darkness set to the sound of her baby's gently coos. She couldn't stop hearing the deputy's voice, pleading the Ranger's case by mentioning how he had helped "those Mormons" get to Paradise Valley safely. Ranger Cooper had added that they were alive and well. Yet he withheld the details she desired to know the most.
After about an hour of restless musing, Charlotte finally surrendered her efforts and threw the covers off of herself. She swung her feet out of the bed, briefly touching them to the bare wooden floors as she leaned forward to reach for a match. She struck it against the oak nightstand and lifted the glass dome from the lamp before setting the flickering flame to the soaked wick. Charlotte replaced the glass and turned up the flame before taking the lamp in hand and crossing the room to the desk, briefly stealing a glance at her sleeping child as she set the lamp down on the surface. It immediately highlighted the letter Mrs. Rutherford had brought up to her the morning before along with her newspaper.
Charlotte sighed as she remembered and took up the envelope. Turning it over, she read the address of the hotel and her name with little regard to the fact that there was no return address. She then slit the envelope open and drew out a smaller envelope. The address was partially illegible and the return address had been completely blotched out. After fingering the piece of mail curiously, Charlotte finally slit the second envelope open and read aloud, barely above a whisper in the deepened quiet of the night.
Dear Charlotte,
It has been too long since we have spoken. I still have not forgotten the day we parted ways in St. Louis. One can hardly believe that nearly two months has passed already since we were in St. Louis. Today we finally made it to Sampson's Trading Post. Truth be told, I really wished I could have left this letter in the trustworthy hands of a postmaster. But the kind man who runs this post assures me my letter will be in good hands and will make it to its destination safely. I must put my faith in that and most importantly in the Lord.
Not much has happened to speak of so far in our journey. I must tell you that Kate has thrived with us! She gets along with the children so very well, and they love and enjoy her teaching. She truly is an answer to our prayers. I only wish that you were here with us. Sam doesn't say much these days. I worry about him sometimes. To see him withdrawn worries me. But I know it is only because he wishes to be with you. And I can't tell you how happy I am to think of you becoming a mother! The little one will truly be a blessing to you. The joys of motherhood can't be merely described with words. I can remember when I first found out that I was expecting. Most of all I was frightened. Fear of being inadequate nearly consumed me. And while I can't be there with you to console these fears, let this be my comfort to you. You will be a wonderful mother. And Sam will be a wonderful father. The love you share is more than enough to carry you through this life.
Lastly, a man has joined us in our travels. His name is Jason Adams. He was a former slave, Kate tells me, who was treated well and learned doctoring. He already has proved a blessing from God since he single-handedly warded away some bad men from having their ways with both Kate and myself. We were not harmed thanks to him. And John and Sam didn't hesitate to invite him to join us. He is an amiable and trustworthy man. I hope perhaps you two will be able to meet before he continues on to California from Paradise Valley.
Right now I am sitting near where Kate is conducting today's classes before dinner. You should see her smile as Tommy and Lizzie are competing again to be better than one another. I'm afraid Lizzie will have the upper hand if Tommy can't keep his studies in order. Thanks to Kate, I think all will be well.
I wish I didn't have to stop writing. But I must begin dinner preparations. I look forward to the day when Sam can bring you and the little one to be with us all once again.
With all my love,
Molly Mason
P.S. – Enclosed is a bit of money for you to use in preparation for your journey west. It is a gift from John and myself to you.
Charlotte could not contain her tears as she held the letter back and let it fall to the desk before allowing her own weight fall into the chair beside her. She then buried her face in her hands in an effort to suppress the sound of her soft cries. Joy seemed to merge with pain in her heart as just as many questions came with the answers before her. It was clear that this letter had come a long way and had been on a journey of its own. Its tattered corners and worn edges proved its age. Still Charlotte couldn't imagine what might have caused the delay. Instead, she chose to reach for what little thankfulness she could reach for within herself. Perhaps the ones she loved the most had not turned their backs on her after all. Circumstance had simply built a harsh wall in the gap that still separated them by far too many miles.
##
Only a small sliver of sunlight peered onto the streets of St. Louis amid the dim, blue skies of sunrise as Charlotte put the final touches on her appearance. She gazed into the mirror above the wash basin for another minute, smoothing her bodice and securing her bonnet at the base of her neck beneath her carefully pinned bun. Swatting at a wayward tear in denial, Charlotte turned to give the room a final onceover. She tried to reassure herself but it didn't help much. For so many memories had taken place in that very room. Dreams had come true, and tears of every kind had accompanied them. Love had been made, and new life had been brought into the world.
Charlotte crossed to the bed with a sigh on her lips, clasping her packed carpetbag shut as best she could before bending low to gather Sam Jr. from the comfort of his cradle. He fussed a little, unaccustomed to being stirred at this early of an hour. But it had to be done, Charlotte reminded herself again and held her child close while refusing to shed another tear. Instead she gripped her bag in hand and paced to the door. She struggled to open it but managed, slipping the heavy bag onto her wrist long enough to get a good grip on the knob while not waking the entire hotel. Charlotte lovingly hushed the little one again before proceeding into the hall, pausing once to close the door as best as she could…quietly, without any fuss or noise amid the darkness.
Few people roamed the street, Charlotte noticed, pausing on the boardwalk outside the hotel to listen to the distant prairie winds that whipped at her neck and face and blew against the blankets that were held snuggly to the baby in her arms. With a deep inhale, Charlotte took a step forward, finding her way to the first livery stable a few outposts up the street. To her surprise, the building was unlocked. Be it an unfortunate mishap or divine providence, Charlotte had no time to consider. She glanced behind her before slipping inside and quickly selecting a horse and saddle. Nervously retrieving the already prepared note and necessary funds, Charlotte placed them on the wooden post, topping it with a heavy rock where they could be seen. Then after making her child comfortable in the sling she had made the night before to secure him around her body, Charlotte slung her carpetbag over the saddle horn and then brought herself and Sam Jr. up and over the smooth leather until she was comfortable in the seat. With a tap of her heels, the horse galloped gently from the large building and into the street led by Charlotte's steady hand.
##
Texas Ranger Hayes Cooper had only spent a few minutes in the company of a distraught Mrs. Rutherford during his breakfast at the hotel he had spent the night at before he realized exactly what all the commotion was about. Cooper had been eating peaceably when his morning meal was interrupted by the hotel owner's wife, drowning in her own tears and begging him to listen to her as she sat opposite him in the hotel dining room.
"I never thought she'd do something like this," the older woman sobbed into her hand-embroidered handkerchief. "But I suppose she loved that man too much to stay and wait. Who can blame her really?"
Cooper nodded aimlessly, letting his gaze drift as he lifted a biscuit with his free hand to scoop up his eggs. "And how long did you say she's been gone?"
"I suppose since early this morning." Mrs. Rutherford handed the Ranger a slip of paper. "I found this on her bed this morning."
Cooper set down his fork and accepted the note, reading it silently. My family needs me. Please don't search for me. I'll find my own way. With all my love, Charlotte Brazos. He then lowered the note after reading it, thinking about the young mother he had met in the streets just yesterday.
"Charlotte and Sam would have been married a year in May. Poor thing. I hope to God the Indians don't get her out there."
Yet through the woman's sobs, Cooper had figured it out quite plainly. Charlotte Brazos had to be the same woman he had met yesterday.
"Please," Mrs. Rutherford took a hold of the Ranger's calloused hands. "Please look for her, Ranger. And—and as much as I want her back here, she belongs with her husband. Take her to him. For me. It's what's best for her, Ranger. She's loves that man dearly. And I do too. She needs someone looking after her."
Cooper's hesitation was clearly displayed on his face as he turned away briefly, seeing the woman's eyes on him from the corner of his eye while waiting eagerly for an answer. He slowly turned back to face her, finally swallowing his last bite of food. "Okay. I'll look for her."
"Oh, thank you! Heaven bless you!"
"But I'm not making any promises, miss." Cooper stirred from the table to take his leave.
"I know," Mrs. Rutherford grinned, following the Ranger into the hotel's small lobby. "It's just your trying that makes me feel a whole lot better."
Secretly, the Ranger was busy harboring thoughts of apprehension. Only he knew what had happened just beyond Paradise Valley. He questioned if the girl was simply in denial, having received the news she had yet to fully accept months ago. Still, she seemed determined enough, Cooper concluded, leaving Mrs. Rutherford to drying her tears as he aimed for the livery stable and his faithful mount. He'd best get an early start. The sooner this lost young mother found the truth, the better.
##
Charlotte read Molly's weather-worn letter once more before realizing just how tired she was from the day's long journey. The hoot owl nearby wouldn't let her forget that easily as the eerie sound caused her to look curiously around herself. The cricket's song also set her on edge while the evening moon barely highlighted the distant grounds within the trees. Sam Jr. was gently drifting to sleep in his mother's arms while she then turned back around, staring headlong into the licking flames of her campfire while reclining gently against her saddle. Charlotte may have not been extremely educated. But she knew how to survive in the wild at least for a girl who had mostly a brother figure for a playmate growing up. Still, the west was full of things she had never actually encountered.
Yet smiling at the thought of her childhood romps and adventures, Charlotte looked into the face of her child, a new renewal of hope in her eyes as she reached a finger to gently stroke him on the cheek. And like a dream suddenly remembered, she saw Sam's face, her heart filling with joy at the thought of drawing that much closer to home.
"Sleep, my child, and peace attend thee, all through the night," Charlotte sang softly. "Guardian angels God will send thee, all through the night. Soft the drowsy hours are creeping; hill and dale in slumber sleeping. I my watching vigil keeping, all through the night."
Still her sweet song echoed around the mother and child as a gentle peace surrounded the harsh countryside when a twig breaking in the distance halted Charlotte's sweet chorus. She lifted her eyes and tightened her grasp while looking to see where the sound came from. Her eyes were filled with fear; her cheeks grew pale as she fought to keep her composure for her child's sake.
Within a few silent moments, a man and horse emerged from the wooded area. Charlotte was tempted to run but stayed seated against her saddle. All concern left her when she recognized the man. In fact, she nearly scoffed and returned her eyes to her child.
Ranger Cooper stopped walking next to her fire, having left his horse at the edge of the woods. "Mind if I have a cup of coffee?"
Charlotte shook her head. "Go ahead."
Cooper bent low, poured himself a come, and took a satisfying gulp of the liquid before bringing the cup down and glancing at the stars. "Beautiful night tonight. But it didn't quite compare to the sound that led me here. I heard your singin' from the trail."
"The trail?" Charlotte whipped her head around. "You mean this isn't the trail that I'm on here?"
"Oh, it's a trail alright." Cooper grunted as he rose to his feet and crossed back to his horse, getting out something from his saddle bag. "It's just not the right one."
Charlotte bowed her head, tears almost replacing where the joy had been moments ago. "I suppose you came back to take me to St. Louis."
"No, ma'am." Cooper returned to Charlotte, stooping down to be seated a few feet away from her.
"Then why are you here?"
Cooper nearly smiled as he cocked a glance her way. "I thought you needed a guide?"
"I do," Charlotte insisted.
"Then what's the problem?"
"I didn't think you were available."
"Well, I suppose I made a hasty decision."
For a moment, Charlotte thought about the fact that this man had traveled and talked with John, Molly, and Sam. She curled her lip into a penitent smile and turned towards the Ranger. "I—I'm sorry, sir."
"What for?"
"I wasn't that civil with you when we first met. I put demands on you that I shouldn't have. Or…that I should have asked in a better way than what I did."
Cooper sipped at his coffee before dumping the remains into the fire, the liquid causing the flames to stifle into a sizzling steam for a second before shooting back into full blaze. "No apology necessary." That said, he rose from the log he was occupying and retrieved the saddle from his horse, propping it nearby before he laid down with his head rested on its leathery comfort.
"Goodnight," the Ranger affirmed before sliding his hat up and onto his eyes. He sighed sharply and drifted off to sleep moments later.
Charlotte kept her eyes on the Ranger for several seconds before she convinced herself to stir, drawing Sam Jr. close to herself after settling against the saddle at her head. Charlotte took a moment to listen to the sounds of the night before she sat up just a bit, checking to be sure her baby was secure before she reached for her carpetbag on her opposite side. Drawing out her journal, Charlotte suddenly felt guilty for having neglected it for so many months. Yet each entry she read for the next hour took her right back to that very moment in time and reminded her of the treasure she had been given. Perhaps she would begin putting pen back to paper again in the coming days.