AN: Here we go with another chappie! :) Hope you enjoy it.
Thank you so much for all your great reviews and support guys. They're actually the best thing about it haha, so keep them coming please :P
To reply to one of your questions: I can't tell you if Damon is going to die, sorry..lol :( But there are definitely much more chappies coming so stay tuned!
*It's not gonna matter in this chapter - but I just wanted to say that the necklace that Damon wanted to give Elena no longer has an emerald as a stone..I thought amber is still a great stone but it actually fits better with Elena's eyes? What do you think?
Thank you again, and please review!
"Stef." Damon said as he held the door of the Boarding House open.
Stefan immediatly glared at him with worry and anxiety. Damon could see his pale face and tired eyes, he probably hadn't slept at all during the flight.
How was he going to tell him? Just thinking about it, seemed much easier. But with his baby bro standing in front of him with an expectant look...it was hell.
"Damon? What the hell happened?" He asked as he stepped in.
"Lower your voice. Jamie and Elena are sleeping." He said, gesturing to him to go into the living room.
Damon poured himself a glass of bourbon, filling one for Stefan too.
"Is this really the time to drink Damon, seriously? It's 5 in the morning and I'm still worried as hell! You pratically made me run here!" Stefan whispered loudly.
"Believe me...you're going to need this." Damon said with a pointed look, handing him the glass.
Stefan was already sitting on the couch, and Damon reclutantly joined him.
"First of all, don't yell at me for what I'm going to say. It just happened, and besides that's not the point of the conversation. Not entirely, at least..." He said as he took a sip from his drink.
Stefan gave him a confused expression and sighed. "Talk Damon." He said in a bored tone.
"I'm with Elena." He said casually.
Stefan's eyes widened as he almost chocked on his drink. "Say what?" He spat. "Dear god Damon, I told you. I told you not to mess around with Elena. You could have whoever you want and you just go and seduce Elena? Caroline is never going to forgive you."
Damon's whole face immediatly hardened as he harshly placed his glass on the table.
"Listen up, Stefan. First of all I couldn't give a fuck about what Caroline forgives or not; and you also need to give me more credit than that and get down from that damn pedestal. What do you think, that just because I didn't settle down like you did I'm not allowed to fall in love with someone now? With Elena? I'm not a heartless asshole as you may think, Stefan. I thought you knew better after all we've been through together." He said as he took his glass again and drank it all in one gulp.
"I don't think you're heartless Damon. I don't even think you're an asshole, at least when you want to. But seriously what should I expect? You've been a womanizer for all your life, and you never told me...you never told me you wanted to fall in love. I know what you think about these things." He said in a softer tone.
"I love her." He suddenly said, making Stefan's surprised eyes snap in his direction again. "You don't even know how much that girl means to me. She's everything to me, she's the best thing that's ever happened in my life and I would never hurt her. Not on purpose..." He said, his eyes saddening saying those last words.
"I'm not following you. What do you mean? Did you do something?" Stefan asked.
"Stef..." Damon started. "I went to Dr. Hunt yesterday. I was not feeling well and I made the test..." He said but couldn't quite find the words to tell Stefan.
When he saw understanding taking in Stefan's face, his heart broke a little. It was a defeated look. Full of hurt and disbelief.
"No.." Stefan whispered.
"He told me there's nothing to do. He gave me from three to six months to live." He said bluntly, not finding a less abrupt way to tell him.
He had never been good at words. Especially these sad and depressing speeches.
"No." Stefan said, this time more firmly. "He's wrong Damon, he's obviously wrong and we'll find a cure. Something." He said, his eyes full of desperation.
"Stefan.." Damon shook his head. "We just have to accept it. It's not like we didn't know that there was a possibility. We've seen this happening before."
"Father has it but he's still here, he's still alive, so there is a cure! Damon you can live!" Stefan said stepping in front of him, shaking his shoulders.
"There are stages of this desease." He said, his eyes full of sorrow. "And I can't do anything about it. Please Stefan don't make it harder, it's already enough." He said snorting.
His brother was being delusional and that was the last thing he needed at the moment.
"Oh my god.." Stefan whispered, falling on the couch and taking his head in his hands. "What am I going to do? And Jamie, what the hell am I going to say to him?" He said shaking his head.
"I already thought about it. I know how I want to deal witht the situation." He said. He took a box that was on the table and held it firmly.
Stefan shaked his head in confusion. "I-I don't understand..."
"Listen to me, Stefan." Damon said putting his hands on his shoulders. "You have to be strong. I need you to be strong, okay? Do it for me. This is all I'm asking. You have to give this to Elena. But not now, I don't want her to have it now. Hide it and give it to her when she's ready. Ten, twenty, thirty years...I don't care. Inside there's a letter and one of mom's necklaces. I want Elena to have them. But only when she'll be ready to have them." He said firmly.
"Damon..."
"I want to leave. I don't know where I'll go. New York, probably. I just...there aren't many people who I care about in this world, but if I can protect those few, it would mean the world to mean. You're the only one who knows the truth and I want you to keep it this way for a long time, are we clear?"
"I can't do this. I can't do this Damon you're asking me too much. What about father? Yeah he's an asshole but he asks about you from time to time. And Caroline and Jamie? Elena!" Stefan tried to make him reason. "You just can't leave us behind. I..I don't want you to go away when you need us the most. Please Damon don't do this." He shook his head desperately.
"I need to do this Stef. I'm doing this especially for Elena. She's been through hell during her whole life..dealing with this..it would destroy her. I can't let that happen. I want her to be happy. I want her to forget about me eventually and move on. I owe her that. It will be easier for her to let it go if she thinks about me as the one who broke her heart, and not as the man she loved who died on her. I'm not asking you to do this, I'm demanding you. You owe me at least this."
He saw acceptance crossing Stefan's face as he nodded numbly.
"Don't pout, broody. You'll just get rid of your pain in the ass brother." He said.
"This is not funny Damon damn it." Stefan said through clentched teeth.
"I know." He said quietly. "I'll leave in a week. Just..I just need some time to organize things. Tomorrow I'll deal with the will." He said.
"Remember to hide this. Don't let Blondie find this." He said serious, handing him the box.
"Oh..and this is for you. I was looking through some stuff earlier and I came across these." He said as he gave him another little box full of pictures. "Look how chubby you were." Damon said smirking.
"I wasn't." Stefan remarked offended. "And look who's talking..you were already a smart ass when you were little. Mom always had to punish you, you were unbelievable." He shook his head amused.
"Yeah." Damon said smiling fondly.
Stefan smiled sadly as he got closer to his brother. Damon eyed him strangely and was surprised when Stefan hugged him close. He wasn't so used to these display of affections, especially from Stefan. They had never been like that. He had never been like that.
"I love you big brother." Stefan's voice was filled with emotion as he whispered it.
"I love you too Stef." He said hesitantly patting his brother's shoulders.
"Elena! Wait!" Stefan shouted as he chased her out of his apartment.
She was walking quickly, going to take a bus to get at Bonnie's house and pack a few things. She rolled her eyes and turned around annoyed by Stefan's persistence. She was going and she was going now.
"Stefan, I already told you that I'm not going to wait." She said in a firm voice.
He looked up at her and smiled sadly.
"I know. I'm not trying to stop you, I just want to give you a ride to the airport." He said.
She eyed him for a moment but then nodded. "Okay...thank you. But first I have to go at Bonnie's and pack a few things up."
"Sure." He nodded as they headed towards his car.
As Stefan drove, they passed in front of the Boarding House and Elena's heart clenched tightly. There was where everything had began. Where she met and fell in love with him.
She remembered how anxious she was about meeting Stefan's older brother, the so-called player Damon Salvatore and all the other terms that people liked to gave him. How he'd opened that door and her knees almost gave up at his sight. She had immediatly thought that he was the most gorgeous thing she had ever seen. He'd been sweet and nice to her since the first moment and she quickly understood that people just blabed about him and his being. They didn't know the first thing about him, he just showed them what he wanted to or what they expected him to be. He just needed someone believing in him.
Elena actually felt honored about Damon opening up to her. Letting his walls down and putting his trust on her and her only. Because once you had Damon's love, it was something you wold hold on to forever. He loved wholly and devotedly.
She was still raging inside…why didn't he tell her? Why did he just leave her? She couldn't imagine her life without him, at least if he had let her know she would have spent all her time loving him.
After spending all the night crying her heart out, now Elena had just anger and regret inside of her. If she got to New York too late…she would never forgive herself for that.
They arrived at Bonnie's a few minutes later and Elena told Stefan to wait in the car. Luckily she had the spare keys so she hopefully wouldn't wake Bonnie up. After all, it was still just 6:30 am, and honestly she didn't have the time and the patience to explain everything to Bonnie.
She packed the essential in a little bag and quickly closed it. As she was about to close her drawer she found something that she didn't notice had been between her clothes all this time. Her eyes got a little watery and a few tears escaped. Again. Damn it Elena, keep it together she thought.
It was Damon's sweatshirt. The very sweatshirt that she used to put on always when she was at the Boarding House. It had pratically become hers. She smiled sadly and inhaled its scent. It still smelled of Damon and she had to do everything in her power not to burst into tears. It was his scent. So familiar, so intoxicating, so good…it was home.
She quickly kissed it and decided to throw it on her instead of the current one that she was wearing. It was comfy and smooth and she snuggled in it, knowing that she had something of his to hold on to for the whole time.
She took her bag and quietly headed out of the house. Stefan was still waiting inside the car as he seemed thoughtful.
"I'm sorry." He just said as she stepped in.
When she didn't reply, he spoke again.
"I'm sorry I kept you from him all this time...I was the only one who knew and I shouldn't have kept it a secret. I shouldn't have left him living so miserably." He said desperately.
Elena sighed heavily. "I get it Stefan. Damon can be difficult sometimes and I know he has probably convinced you that it was for the best. He wants people to believe that he's tough and that he can survive all alone…but the truth is that he's wrong. He needs people who loves him and he loves like everyone else. He's fragile. He just hates to admit it." She said shaking her head.
Stefan nodded and they drove to the airport in complete silence, both of them just lost in their thoughts.
"You sure you're okay from here?" Stefan asked as he dropped her off.
"I think I can manage, don't worry." She said chuckling sadly.
She didn't know why, but in that moment she felt the urge to hug Stefan and tell him that he would have seen his brother again. That they would have seen him again. After all Stefan had carried all the pressure and pain all by himself for three months. He needed at least some support.
She hugged him and after the pure surprise on his face, he hugged her back.
"I'll get him back. I'll go there and no matter how much time we've left, I will love him like we have no tomorrow. But I'll bring him back to you…okay?" She said smiling tentatively.
"Okay." He whispered quietly.
She gave him one last smile and got out of the car taking her bag.
It was cold and there were only a few people heading inside and outside of the airport. Elena asked for the first ticket and luckily the first flight available to New York was in two hours.
Thinking about Damon doing the same thing three months ago but all alone..it broke her heart. He didn't have to be alone, he wasn't alone. Of course it would have been painful for her to stand, but no matter what, she was going to love him forever.
There was no 'moving on'. Moving on..such an easy word to say, Elena thought. Moving on is hard and sometimes impossible and she knew it by her own experience.
When she thought about their break-up, or at least what Damon wanted her to believe, it still hurt. The words he had said hurt her deeply and her heart still wretched thinking about them…but hopefully none of them were real. Hopefully he still loved her just how much she loved him. Otherwise, him not loving her back anymore, would have devastated her.
For the next two hours she just chilled and had breakfast at Starbucks, since food on the flight was going to suck. She planned on sleeping a little once on it because she was indeed really tired.
Luckily the boarding started soon. She didn't want any delays. She wanted to be there as soon as possible, because anxiety was consuming her.
As she took her seat, Elena thought about how much she had always loved the idea of going to New York, how much the city always inspired her and gave her good vibes. Who knew that she was going to go under these circumstances…
Someone's voice pulled her out of her thoughts.
"Excuse me, miss?" A man's voice called.
"Yes?"
"That's my seat, actually." He said with a smile.
"Oh..you're right, I'm sorry. I just didn't see anyone and thought that I could use it. I don't really fly often and being near the window kind of helps me." She said politely as she stood up to seat in the middle.
"Don't worry, I was just teasing you. I'll take the one in the middle." He said as he chuckled a little.
"Oh." Elena said confused as she sat down again, not really in the mood for a talk.
"So..are you from New York? Or you're just visiting?" He asked.
"No it's just..a trip. I live here in Mystic Falls." She said quickly.
She thought that she could use some sleep but here she was caught in a random conversation with a stranger. The fact that he kept his eyes on her all the time didn't help.
"I see..I happen to come here once in a while for business. Such a nice place." He said.
She nodded smiling tightly as she hoped that he would just shut up. He was bugging her.
He kept talking when she didn't even start the conversation or wanted it to go on.
"I'm Josh, by the way." He said with a charming smile.
"Elena." She said shaking his hand.
He wasn't that bad, after all. He seemed polite and good looking. Elena couldn't help but wonder if her finding him bothering was just because the thought of another man hitting on her was annoying, almost unbereable. She didn't want to think about it, she didn't want it period. Not now, not in thirty years. She just wanted Damon and now life was taking him away from her. Why the people she loved always ended up dying, or leaving her? Was she cursed or something?
But maybe they were wrong, maybe they were wrong about Damon and they could find a cure and keep him here. There had to be something to do. She couldn't let him go without fighting. He was her love, how could she ever live in a world where he didn't exist?
Her eyes started getting a little blurry and she saw that Josh eyed her strangely and put his earphones on. Maybe he just took the hint.
She probably justt seemed a depressed and broody person, but she didn't care. She was probably going to be like that for a very long time now.
She closed her eyes and demanded to her mind to relax, at least just for a little. She shut every thought off and quickly drifted to a much needed rest.
When she woke up she immediatly looked out of the window but saw nothing besides clouds and the sky. She huffed quietly and glanced at her clock, noticing that it was still 10 am. She had been asleep for not even an hour and the flight was four or five hours.
She saw that John, or Josh, she didn't quite remember his name fell asleep and thanked god.
She wondered how Damon would react seeing another man flirting with her and she chuckled softly. She remembered how jealous he had been of Elijah...but she had found his jealousy adorable. He always told her that he wasn't but she knew better.
When she and Damon broke-up, of course the first things that her friends did was comforting her, but even reminding her of the few basic rules; as in delete his number, don't think about him, he's worthless, delete your pictures with him and all the rest.
She did it, but she didn't tell anyone that she had indeed kept one of their pictures. It was their favorite one, and for some reasons she hadn't been able to just delete it like that. She had never actually looked at it again, but just knowing that she still had it…it was important to her.
It was a picture taken with her Iphone. They were laying on the bed and Damon was half on top of her, biting her cheek playfully as she laughed as an idiot and they both looked into the screen. It was a little messy because they were moving and it was a self-shot, but their eyes were so happy in that picture, genuine happiness. Seeing his ocean blue eyes again sent a chill down her spine as she softly caressed the screen.
"Elena?" Josh's voice pulled her out of her thoughts.
"Yeah?"
"You want something to drink? The hostess is here." He said.
She didn't even notice how absorbed in her thoughts she'd been until she saw the hostess's expectant look.
"I'll take some coke, please." She said.
The hostess handed it to her and moved on. She wasn't a sucker for coffee, so when she could Elena always went for coke.
She then thought about was Stefan told her; Damon was at a Four Seasons hotel, unfortunately though he didn't know which one so Elena had to guess herself. She found amusing and quite predictable how Damon always opted for the best choice.
"You're from New York, right?" She found herself asking Josh.
"Yes. I told you before." He said with a nod, smiling.
"Well…in your opinion, what's the best Four Seasons hotel in there? It's really important." She said with a tight smile.
He seemed thoughtful for a few moments. "Definitely the one on Fifth Avenue. Its suites are pratically apartments." He said.
"I see..thank you." She said thoughtful.
If Josh who was from New York indeed confirmed her that, she had no doubts. Damon had to be there. And even if he wasn't, she would have searched for him in every other hotel of the damn city.
"Why are you asking me that? Do you want to go there?" He asked.
"I was just curious." She quickly lied. "I just wanted to know the best places to visit, even if they're just hotels, you know." She shrugged.
"Oh.." He said. "I can always give you a tour of the city, if you want to." He said with a mischevious glim in his eyes.
Oh, lord. She wasn't good at rejecting especially if you had to have that person near you for the next four hours. How did she get herself into this? Most of all didn't he already take the hint? He was probably a die-hard.
"Look...I really appreciate your offer, but I'm not going to New York to just look around the city. It's something personal that I just..can't talk about. Sorry." She said.
He seemed disappointed. "I understand. Take this anyway..just in case." He said handing her a little piece of paper.
Not wanting to discuss about it anymore Elena quickly took it and put it in her bag.
The rest of the flight was pretty quiet as she napped a little bit more and watched a movie.
When they landed to New York, her palms were actually sweating. She was there. Finally after three months she was in the same city as his, so close to him already. She knew that another emotional moment was coming but she kept it together as much as she could.
Luckily she was in one of the first rows so she quickly took her bag and stepped outside. She still couldn't believe it was real but she kept walking and got out of the bulding to take a taxi as soon as possible.
Needless to say, it almost seemed a jungle. It was New York, of course there was going to be such a mess. To make things even worst, it was raining like hell and it was really cold.
She finally managed to take a taxi but in the meantime she took a lot of water and was soaked from tip to toe.
"Where to?" The driver asked.
"Four Seasons hotel. The one on fifth avenue." She said as she shivered a little and wrapped her arms around herself.
She didn't even have the strenght or the desire to look out of the window and enjoy the city a little. The closer they got, the more anxious she was. Her heart started beating faster knowing that she would see him in hours. Minutes. Or at least, she hoped so.
In twenty minutes they were there and Elena was mesmerized by the building and the beautiful surroundings. Even from the outside, you could see how luxurious it was.
She quickly paid the driver and took her bag, running inside trying not to catch other rain. She noticed all the classy and fancy people and felt quite uncomfortable in her casual and very soaked mise. At the moment though she couldn't care less. Now she just had to make up an excuse to know Damon's room number and sneak in.
"Hello." She smiled warmly as she reached the reception.
"Hello there. How can I help you?" The girl at the desk asked with a smile.
"I'm…I'm here to see one of your clients. Damon Salvatore." She said, her voice trembling a little when she said his name. When she saw the girl giving her a confused look she spoke again. "It's a surprise." She explained.
"I'm sorry miss, but before giving you that kind of information, I'd have to ask Mr. Salvatore's approval. Your name?" She said as she help up the phone.
Damn it. She smiled politely again.
"Look…please." She sighed defeated. "I'm not a serial killer or something. I even know his brother, Stefan. Please?" She pratically begged.
"Alright." The other woman sighed, slightly amused. "Mr. Salvatore is in room 500. He took our best suite." She said.
Elena almost rolled her eyes. So typical of Damon.
"Thank you." She grinned as she quickly went to the elevator.
She couldn't believe this was really happening. Just like when she was nervous, her stomach was clentched together and she was feeling the terribile need to throw up from how anxious she was. Inside the elevator she started taking deep breaths, telling herself to cool down.
She didn't know how she would have handled the situation, or if she would have yelled at him for not telling her, or just break down. The only thing she knew was that she was finally going to see him again.
As he stepped out of the shower and threw only a pair of jeans on, Damon decided that today he was going to finally get out of this room after five days. He was losing it, and if he didn't distract himself a little, he was probably going to take the first flight for Mystic Falls.
When he slept almost all the day, or just got drunk, he could manage not to think about her. Somehow the thought of her hurt less and the fact that he was dying was becoming less unbereable to stand. After all, now he had nothing left to lose.
But in moments like this when he was completely alone..he missed her too much. He missed what they had and how he wasn't going to see her or being able to touch her again.
His fists clentched together as he suddenly hit the mirror of the bathroom breaking most of it. His hand started bleeding a little and he almost laughed out loud at the ridiculousness of the situation.
What was what they said? Breaking a mirror brought seven years of bad luck? At this point he would have gladly taken those seven years if he could.
To make things worst the feeling of missing Elena became deeper, almost unbereable. It was like he was feeling her presence, as if she was so close to him and yet he couldn't see her. Indeed, he was losing it, he thought.
He'd even broken a mirror, for god's sake. Not like he cared, but he had to come up with some lame excuse to tell. He put his hand under the cold water to wash away the blood. As the water kept streaming, he heard a knock on the door. He rolled his eyes and decided to ignore it but when they got louder he huffed in frustration and went to open it.
Before he could do it though, his body completely froze and his eyes widened at the voice he heard. No…it couldn't be. He was allucinating or something.
"Damon…I know you're in there. Open up." She sighed a little annoyed, though he could hear the emotion in her voice.
Just stop. He couldn't hear anything because this wasn't real, it couldn't be.
He knew he couldn't trust Stefan, that sooner or later that little fucker would have chickened out and spill everything to everyone.
She knocked louder.
"Damon please. I'm freezing." She said almost desperately.
As the overprotective side of him pratically possessed him, he went opening the door without even thinking.
Part of him thought that he was dreaming, that once he opened the door she wouldn't be there anymore…but as he secretly hoped, she was there.
After three months of longing finally he got to see her beautiful big doe eyes looking up at him again. She was so perfect.
She looked up at him with so many emotions that in that moment he couldn't actually focus. His heart was beating like a drum.
"'Lena." He whispered with a smile of disbelief on his face.
"Damon." She sobbed as she threw herself at him.
She pratically threw herself up in his arms, holding on to his neck like a lifeline. Her legs were wrapped around his waist and she started sobbing hard in the crook of his neck.
"I hate you so much right now! Why didn't you tell me! You lied to me!" She started sobbing harder, her words muffled as she kept buring her face in his neck. "How could you leave me like that, I would have been with you no matter what Damon and you know it." She almost screamed.
No longer able to cover his own emotions, he embraced her back, holding her tight against his body. He hated hearing her crying, it made him feel even more guilty and it was just too much to take in.
She was sobbing so hard that he wondered if she was having trouble breathing.
"Ssshhh..." He soothed her, softly caressing her hair. "I know you have every right to be mad at me but please Elena calm down…" He whispered in her ear, fearing of having an emotional breakdown himself at moments.
It was all just so surreal. For the past three months he had been missing her like crazy, secretly hoping to see her one last time, and now here she was in his arms.
"No! I'm not going to calm down okay!" She started protesting as she hit his back.
"Okay...I think I deserved that." He chuckled a little.
"Don't you dare laugh Damon."
"Sorry." He said quietly as he held her closer and placed his head on her shoulder.
Elena's breathing eventually softened, as she just cried quietly holding on to him for dear life. He kept telling her soothing words as he rocked her back and fort.
Through all the emotional moment going on he didn't notice Elena being completely soaked. With the cold weather she had to warm up immediatly.
"You're all soaked. Go take a hot shower or a bath and we'll talk later, alright?" He said as he put her down, caressing her cheek hesitantly.
Luckily she didn't flinch or backed away, but she still gave him a hard look and shook her head firmly.
He sighed. "Come on now Elena, this is not the moment to be stubborn." He said.
"Fine." She said harshly as she took her mini-suitcase and stepped into the barhtoom.
A gasped escaped her mouth as she entered. Oh, right…the mirror.
"What happened in there? Are you okay?" She asked concerned.
"I just…lost it a little. No big deal, it's fine." He said looking away.
"No it's not fine Damon. How could it be? You've been living miserably and alone all these months, of course you're losing it." She said stepping closer. "Look at this hand.." She said to herself, shaking her head. She took his hand into hers and squeezed it softly.
"You should have told me." She whispered as her eyes filled up with emotion again. She took his hand to her mouth and kissed it softly. "You know I'd do anything for you."
He wanted to say something, anything, but as he opened his mouth nothing came out. "We will talk about it later...now though get dry please." He said squeezing her hand back.
"Okay." She said softly.
She gave him a smile and kissed him on the lips hesitantly. She was still his. She was kissing him, and he could feel her love. Even if he had hurt her and things between them were going to change without coming back; the love and the need that he felt were the same of when he'd last kissed her.
Not being able to resist her, he gently grabbed her head with his hands and deepened the kiss, kissing her passionately until they both needed to catch their breaths. He rested his forehead against hers as she gave him another quick peck on the lips.
"I've missed you." She said blinking back her tears.
"I've missed you too, baby girl." He said.
Hearing the pet-name that he used to gave her melted her heart and she started crying again. This time though more in joy.
"I'm sorry it's just I've been such a mess these last couple of days. All I did was crying." She said laughing between her sobs.
He chuckled a little kissing the tears away.
"Come here." He said mocking an 'aw' and taking her in his arms again.
"Don't mock me." She pouted lightly punching him.
He smirked and then she immediatly recognized her Damon. He showered her face with kisses as she just melted in his arms purring happily.
Without even realizing it they were already in the bedroom, still kissing the hell out of each other. It was rough, it was longing and need. They both needed each other.
"Your shower?" He asked in a husky voice.
"You can warm me up." She said mischeviously.
"Are you sure?" He said, and she could see the vulnerability in his eyes.
He had the face of a boy whose mother told him that he could eat a candy before dinner.
She had always known that this was going to be a huge step for them. Making love to someone bonded you with that person deeply, the connection that you shared would be stronger and she couldn't wait to experience that with Damon.
The one that from now on would always be the only one able to share that connection with her.
If when they were still back in Mystic Falls a physical relationship scared her because of her insecurities, now she only craved it more than anything. She needed it. She wanted to feel everything of him, she wanted to know what was like being loved by Damon Salvatore.
"I'm sure." She whispered nodding, kissing him lightly.
He smiled at her, a smile full of adoration, and kept kissing her passionately. She bounced on the bed with him on top of her.
"Isn't this mine?" He chuckled softly as he took in the sweatshirt she was wearing.
"Yeah but it's all been ruined by the rain now. I'm sorry." She pouted.
"To hell with it 'Lena…I'll give you another one." He said amused, as he took it off her and made her gasp.
He started kissing her neck and nibbling lightly on it, making her shudder underneath him. He kept going lower as he finally reached her flat stomach, lifting her shirt and kissing her abdomens. He slowly unbottoned it, leaving her in a bare chest in a few seconds.
She was gorgeous. Her lips were swollen from his kisses and her cheeks slightly flushed. Her perfect round breasts waiting for him to devour them.
As he saw her biting her lip nervously, he immediatly reassured her kissing her lightly and slowly on the lips.
"You're beautiful." He whispered, rubbing his nose against hers.
She moaned softly as he took one of her hard rosy nipples into his mouth. He kept sucking and licking around it and she moaned louder. When he moved to the other one, she wrapped her legs around his waist, pushing her hips against his making him groan.
"Damon.." She breathed his name.
She ran her hands up and down his bare back, enjoying the feeling of his warm skin.
He moved down her stomach, kissing his way down her belly and unzipping her jeans. In a moment they were across the room and she was left only in her panties. He looked up at her and she nodded in approval, feeling her desire for him increasing.
He started kissing her thighs taking his sweet time. At that point her core was throbbing with need for him and she squeezed her legs together.
Taking the hint he smirked smugly and slowly took off her panties. He inserted one of his experted fingers inside her wet core and she moaned loudly arching her back. He started thrusting in and out of her adding another finger. Not able to resist tasting her, he started licking inside her wet folds.
"Wha-what are you doing?" She asked nervously, still breathing heavily as her eyes snapped open.
"You're delicious." He said in his seductive tone.
"Oh no, Damon. No one has ever…I mean…it's gross, isn't it? Why don't we just –" She was saying nervously.
"Elena." He said calmly, devouring her name. "Relax." He said with an amused smile. "It's not gross, baby. If no one has ever done this to you…it's their loss. And yours." He said smirking as he kept working on her.
"Besides, I took it as an invitation." He said grinning and looking down at her bare flesh. "I love it." He said huskily, doing the eye-thing that she loved so much.
When Caroline made her do it, Elena felt completely embarassed after. It was just so weird. The fact that Damon seemed to enjoy it so much only flattered her though.
He kept nibbling on her clit and thrusting his fingers inside her, making her begging for release. She moaned loudly and arched her back in pleasure as he made her come with one last thrust.
Once he was done she was painting heavily. He kissed the insides of her thighs then making his way up to her again.
Her cheeks were flushed and she had a drunky expression.
"That was…"
"Gross?" He teased, raising an eyebrow.
"No." She grinned. "It was amazing. You are amazing." She said as she kissed him passionately.
He groaned loudly when her hand came in contact with his hard bulge and she started stroaking him through the material of his jeans.
"Let's get rid of them..shall we?" She said in a seductive voice.
He grinned mischeviously and growled devouring her neck. As she tried to unzip his pants, anxiety took the best of her again and she huffed in frustration. Damon smiled at her softly and covered her hand with his own, helping her to undress him.
They needed to talk. They needed to do and deal with a lot of things. But right now, they were just two people who loved each other and needed each other. No one else and nothing else existed but them.
She smiled so devotedly at him that his own eyes got a little teary. When had he become so emotional? Being with a woman had never been like that before. With other women was just sex, simple as that.
But with Elena it was making love. For the first time in his life Damon Salvatore was making love to a woman. He worshipped and loved the woman who was laying under him, wrapped in his arms, completely his.
With one gentle thrust he started penetrating her. He could feel how tight she was and it only made him harder. When he heard her whimpering though he immediatly looked at her in the eyes.
"Did I hurt you?" He asked softly as he stroked her hair backwards.
She shook her head firmly, kissing him on his shoulder and pulling him closer. She wrapped her legs tight against his waist as he started thrusting in and out of her. Her soft cries echoed the room as he increased his speed, pulling them both into oblivion.
Elena felt tingles all over her body, as she was wrapped safely into his arms with him inside of her she realized that it was where she belonged all along. After three months, twelve weeks, ninety days of longing and hurting she was finally where she belonged.
"I didn't use protection 'Lena…" He groaned lightly, ready to pull out.
His words though seemed to can't make her think properly. She was desperate for him. She didn't want this to end, she wanted everything for him, and since she couldn't keep him…she quickly lied to him.
"I'm on the pill." She blunty lied smiling reassuringly.
He took one of her legs and raised it up his hip, thrusting deeper inside of her.
"Damon!" She screamed, scratching his shoulders with her nails as he growled her name in the crook of her neck.
She moaned and painted and after a few more thrusts he came deep inside of her as she felt his warmth penetrating her.
She lied. She had lied to him but she didn't care. She was going to love him for all the time they still had, and she knew that she could only love another person like she loved him.
His child.
If god wanted to give her this miracle, she would have loved it and honored it forever.
She wanted it. But she knew that if Damon knew about this, he would never let her do that, just like everyone else around her. But he wouldn't know anyway…and other people's opinions didn't matter anyway. At least she was going to have something of his for the rest of her life.
"I love you." He said. His big blue eyes filled with unspoked emotion.
"I love you too Damon. Forever." She said, her voice pitching a little.
His smile saddened a little as he understood what she meant. He rested his forehead against hers, kissing her sweetly.
He laid down next to her and took her in his arms, wrapping them around her protectively. She rested her head on his heart, its sound calming her like it was a lullaby.
"I can't believe this really happened..for all these months...I thought you didn't want me." She said quietly.
Her voice was sad and he knew exactly what she meant. Not knowing a better way to leave her he had told her the most horrible things, things that couldn't be forgiven. But here she was in his arms making him the happiest person in the world.
He tightened his grip on her, kissing the top of her head.
"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean them Elena...I…I just wanted you to hate me. I was desperate and I didn't know what to do." He said and she could hear the actual desperation in his voice.
"You could have told me. You know I would never leave you. Not even when..when you will…" She wanted to say the words but they just couldn't come out of her mouth as her voice started cracking.
"Die?" He asked defeated.
"Please don't say that word Damon. Don't, not now." She whispered as she closed her eyes.
"You're right..." He said quietly, kissing her head. "Why don't you get some sleep? You're probably tired..especially after this.." He waggled his eyebrows making her giggle.
"Cocky much?" She said.
"Very much." He replied, kissing her nose.
"Damon?" She asked looking up at him.
"Yeah?"
"Can you stay here with me..and just hold me?" She whispered with vulnerability in her eyes.
"I'll be right here, love." He reassured her.
"Good." She said smiling a little.
She snuggled close to his body, hugging his chest as he did the same with her. She'd always loved sleeping like this with him. It made her feel protected and warm. She threw a leg possessively around his, buring her face in the crook of his neck.
She could hear his heartbeat. The same heartbeat that used to be her lullaby, her favorite sound. The heartbeat that she feared would stop beating at any second now.
She woke up that it was dark outside. The lights of the street and buildings was the only light filling the room. She looked on her side and saw Damon still sleeping peacefully. His arms were still safely secured around her not letting her go. Being with Damon was all she wanted. She could stay like this forever.
She softly caressed his hair and took in his face while sleeping. He seemed so young, so innocent. He was cute. She chuckled a little as she thought that he would probably get offended if she ever told him that he was 'cute'.
She kissed the sides of his face softly, not wanting to wake him up.
She got up and quickly searched for something to put on. She found one of his shirts over a chair and pulled it on. It was at least three sizes bigger but she loved it anyway. It reached mid-thigh and she found herself comfortable in it.
When she first arrived she hadn't really noticed the room, or more like the apartment, too overhelmed by all the emotions and Damon. But it was truly beautiful. Of course it had to be it was a suite in the most beauiful hotel in New York…but still. She went to the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror or at least what had remained of it.
Her face was glowing and she had a strange sparkle in her eyes. Something that she hadn't seen in a long time. She finally realized that she was happy.
Not wanting Damon or herself to get hurt, she quickly fixed the mess Damon had made with all the glasses. Beside that the room seemed decent so she presumed that Damon allowed someone to come over and clean up.
She tip-toed over the bed and kneeled beside him, giggling softly when she saw the pout he was making in his sleep.
"Damon?" She asked quietly, petting his hair. "Baby?" She asked again chuckling when he pretended that he didn't hear her.
"Mmmmmm." He mumbled, his face still buried in the pillow.
She had forgotten how childish and boyish he could be sometimes.
"What do you want for dinner? I'm not very hungry but still we have to eat something." She said as she kept stroking his dark locks.
"You." He said opening one ocean blue eye.
She rolled her eyes.
"I'm serious." She said with a pointed look.
"I was serious…" He pouted. "Okay then, whatever you like." He shrugged and closed his eyes again.
"Lazy." Elena muttered under her breath, shaking her head.
As she was reaching the other side of the room her phone started ringing in her bag. She quickly ran to pick it up and saw that it was Caroline.
Crap! She'd totally forgotten, she was supposed to call her or Stefan hours ago.
"Elena?" Caroline immediatly replied anxiously.
"Hey Care…" She said biting her lip.
"Thank god! I was so worried. You were supposed to call me!" She said loudly.
"I know, I know...sorry. It's just..with all the feelings I didn't think about it. It was just so much to take in." She sighed.
"I know sweetie. Stefan and I couldn't sleep either, we're all upset." Caroline said in a softer tone. "How is he?"
Yeah…the million dollar question. The argument they still hadn't touched. Elena knew that when they did, she would be a mess all over again. One thing was reading a letter and hearing it from Stefan. But talking about it with Damon..it was going to be awful. She didn't want to go through it.
"He...he seems fine to me Care. I know it's not like that but..he's the same Damon." She shrugged defeated, biting her lip to contain the tears that were already threatening to escape. "We still haven't talked about it. I think we're both scared to face it."
"Of course...let us know when you talk about it though, okay? Now that you know the truth Stefan wants him to come back here so bad. Try to convince Damon please." She said.
"I will." She nodded firmly.
"Oh, just for the record…" Caroline said, and this time Elena could hear another kind of curiosity behnd her words. "What did you two do all this time?"
"We..." Elena said biting her lip, "we made love." She confessed.
She could hear Caroline gasping and squealing from the other line.
"Awwww! So romantic! So beautiful! You made it in the city of love." She said excitedly.
Elena chuckled amused. "Wasn't it Paris?" she said raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah whatever but still, it's New York…" Caroline was saying when something interrupted her.
"Care?"
"I gotta go El. Someone's knocking at the door. Ugh, great timing. Just now that you were going to fill me in with all the details."
"Who said I would have?" She teased.
"Bye bye Elena. Go have some great sex with Damon." Caroline said.
She heard Elena gasping and quickly hung up.
And now who could it be? Stefan had his keys and Jamie was already asleep. She was only in her pj and robe but she didn't really care at the moment.
When she opened the door, she didn't recognize the woman at first. She narrowed her eyes a little trying to remember and suddenly she realized. Wasn't she Livia…oh right, Lydia, one of Stefan's uncles wife?
"Lydia?" Caroline asked perplexed by the woman's late visit.
The woman nodded and Caroline quickly told her to come in, concerned about her shocked face.