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Give Yourself To Me

Chapter seventeen: Denial

Edmund could feel Caspian's lips against his, moving in a slow and gentle manner. The elder's kiss was soft and sweet, which took away from his rather intimidating presence and made him appear romantic.

Caspian pulled away from the kiss and gazed into the brown orbs that now danced with lust. "Edmund," he exhaled onto the younger's now damp and buzzing lips. "Give yourself to me."

A devilish grin stretched his lips but to Edmund, the words that were spoken to him reminded him of the night his very existence had spiralled out of control -making Edmund suddenly question what motives Caspian may have. Were his intentions pure?

"No, I-... I can't do this." He hesitated, closing his eyes in an attempt to clear his mind.

Caspian was taken aback, and looked at the raven with a puzzled look in his eyes.

"I thought you wanted to know the truth, Edmund?" He asked, in a way that humiliated Edmund- he had come this far only to so suddenly decline Caspian's offer after begging him with such desperation before.

Edmund did crave the truth, but he pondered on whether it was right for him to learn more than what he is already aware of now. What will become of him if he hears something far more extreme than that of which Caspian has already informed him of?

"And if I regret all of this, wish I had never come in the first place, and then what do I do? I can't return to the life I once had, not in situation of which I am in right now. However I shall never be able to return to Peter, and crawl back into the many lies that lay within his embrace."

Edmund could feel what seemed as though his heart was breaking yet again. He was torn between his desires and what may be right. Why did he seek so greatly for information on Peter? Had he not grown to slowly love his sandy-blonde prince? Or was it that there was a deep emptiness in Edmund, that he felt he needed a reason to despise Peter, for he couldn't truly hate him even after all he had stolen from him- his humanity, his life, his innocence.

"Edmund, you need not worry of what secrets lurk within your sweet Peter's past, or what should happen to you. It is true that Peter has taken everything from you, leaving you with no other option other than to remain as his pet... But you forget something vital, Edmund; you are your own being. No one owns you, not even Peter." Caspian gazed lovingly into Edmund's eyes, his thumb caressing soft plump lips before whispering upon them. "It was you who made the decision to come meet with me this bright and early dawn, and it was your choice alone. Only you have the power to do as you so desire. If you wish to stop here, then by all means... be my guest. However, if you crave answers then follow me."

Caspian stood up and silently walked towards the set of double doors. He turned the handle and open only one before turning his whole body in Edmund's direction. "Remember Edmund, the choice is yours. Whatever fate you chose has been created by you alone... You know what to do."

Just as his foot took a step forward, Edmund's voice could be heard from behind where he stood, causing his body to come to an instant halt.

"Caspian," he said firmly, standing up in full-hearted knowing, as he stared at the taller male with determination burning within his dark coffee eyes. "Take me with you. I give myself to you, but only if I get what I want in return."

A smile crept upon Caspian's lips, in what some would assume as triumphant success. Although to Edmund, the smirk on the other male's lips spoke a different rhythm; one of which he knew was an inevitable fate now that he had spoken up. But it was too late to take a step back now, what's done was done and Edmund hoped it was the right choice to have made.

"To my bedchamber it is."

Edmund followed Caspian out and into the hall-way, where he was taken to the quarters of the building in which Caspian's bedchambers were situated. Edmund could feel a sense of anxiety building within him as he followed the male walking before him and upon arriving here by Caspian's side, Edmund had not even gone as far as to assume that their meeting would turn into such an event, but due to where they were both heading during this moment, Edmund couldn't help but feel as though Caspian had intended it for it to be this way prior to him arriving at the elder's humble home.

Abruptly, Caspian stopped in front of a large double-set of doors. They were large, looming tall over Edmund. He had never seen a set of doors as grand as the entrance of what he could only have assumed to be the room in which only Caspian could lay his head each bright and early morning.

The elder male pushed open both of the doors, revealing the luxurious space in which he spent most of his days. The room was dark, thick and heavy curtains blocking out all sunlight. Just as it was in Peter's room, except Peter did not slumber in such an extravagant manner, and in comparison to Caspian, Peter was a mere Lord, and Caspian was the true King.

Edmund gaped at the environment of which he was in, full of awe at how lavish everything was.

"You seem to look as if you are in shock Edmund," Caspian spoke, stepping into the room as he began to remove his blazer.

"There is no need to feel so tense," he continued, noticing Edmund's stiff position, his body still stood still at the doorway into Caspian's bedroom. "I assure you, I am a gentle and caring lover if that is what you fear."

But it wasn't what Edmund feared. Edmund's mind were filled with worries far greater than to that of a sexual matter, for what Caspian did with him could not differ any more from the unbearable pleasure he felt in Peter's arms. If anything, he assumed Caspian would lack in such a department when compared to his mighty Peter.

"No, this is not what I fear Caspian." Edmund replied lowly, gradually taking a step forward into Caspian's room which looked to be a heavy duty to have completed on his part, as if he didn't want to come in at all. "I only have worries of what consequences will fall upon me once this deed has been done. It is true what they say, Vampires truly are wicked."

Caspian turned to Edmund, fully facing the boy with an expression that bore the mixed emotions of humour, astonishment and offense. "You think of me wicked?"

Edmund quickly regretted his words. "No, I didn't mean- Well yes, somewhat."

The older male scoffed then shook his head, soft chocolate hair swaying gently to the motion. "I must say, I am rather offended by such a remark. I have shown you nothing but kindness, especially when it comes to Peter. Surely what he has done to you if far greater a cruel act than what I have done. I have done nought but tell you the truth that would only benefit you, dear Edmund. Yet after all I have done for you, you still come to see me as 'somewhat wicked'. I am truly baffled and angered by such a remark!"

Although Caspian was filled with anger, his voice still followed the tone of someone simply surprised and nothing more. But Edmund could tell from the look in Caspian big brown eyes, that wrath and hurt lurked within him.

"I... I apologise Caspian, but it is simply how I feel."

Caspian raised his hand, his trigger finger pointing towards the ceiling. "And how do you feel about Peter, your beloved King? From stealing your soul and treating you like his pet, you still don't see such behaviour as 'wicked'?" His words were running cold; the emotions he had put on display earlier had all but vanished, leaving nothing but the stale tone of pure irritation.

Edmund was at a loss; his eyes fell to the floor momentarily before darting right back up and in Caspian's direction. "Peter and I have a deep bond; it runs deeper than what most can see. Only we know what feelings and emotions run between us and we-"

Edmund's words were cut short as the elder male threw a dagger at his string of words, forcing himself in.

"-However, you have not a clear understanding of what disasters he has caused. The murderous and cruel things that he's done and will continue to do somehow do not faze you. You are still naive, and it shall be too late when you finally discover the truth." Caspian's words trailed off as he turned from the boy, all frustration in his voice swept away and only grimace left to brew.

The atmosphere in the room suddenly spiralled downwards, casting up a thick smoke of despair and misery within the confines of such a luxurious space. Edmund felt that he too had crashed down along with the atmosphere, his mind on the verge of exploding; this was too much. He couldn't take it anymore.

It was silent, neither of them willing to speak. Edmund felt he needed to say something, but couldn't. His plump lips trembled each time he cracked them apart and tried to whisper but a response, yet whenever he did the over whelming feeling of wanting to scream or cry was simply too powerful for him to deal with; until finally, he spoke up.

"What am I doing right now, Caspian? Am I not here to learn the truth?" His words felt fragile, broken words falling out in a distorted rhythm; pain and frustration swimming in his voice.

"You are torn, Edmund." Caspian responded, his back still turned as he spoke in a soft and subtle tone. "You are torn, but you know what Peter has done. You know it, yet you continue to deny it and repeatedly defend him."

A pause followed Caspian's words, which Edmund took the time to absorb the older male's words. Was Caspian right, or was the young raven simply making the situation far more difficult than what it really was? There was a dark secret he knew had to be uncovered, however he would never get to it if he continued to argue with Caspian.

"There are things that have happened that you could never believe, Edmund. Just show me how strongly you want this and I shall deliver it personally. You need not worry of what happens to you beloved Peter, for I assure you, your opinions on him will differ once you hear what I have to say. I do this not to cause you heartache, but to save you." Caspian turned, moving towards Edmund at a casual pace as he continued to speak without pause.

"This is for you Edmund; I do this for your benefit. I know Susan has acted coldly to you, but I hope you understand it is due to the fact that she is simply in love with Peter, and has been maddened by the horrors she has witnessed. She is nothing but a dainty fool."

Edmund was silent as listened carefully to Caspian's words, but there was a part of him that questioned Caspian's motives. "Is this truly for my benefit Caspian and not the words of a villain trying to corrupt one's mind against their master?" The young raven asked peering into the eyes that he felt manipulated his decisions and thoughts.

"There is something about you; yet I am unable to point out what it is that specifically speaks to me. It's as if you hold some form of power over me, different to Peter's. So hypnotizing..." Edmund's words slowly fading, falling into a daze as he was enchanted once again by an abyss of eyes that reminded him of brown diamonds.

Caspian smirked, wrapping an arm around Edmund's slender waist, pulling the boy closer so not an inch of space between their pressing bodies was felt. "Do you accept the deal or not?"

Edmund sighed; it was unsteady as he allowed himself to fall into Caspian's trust. Something he had been weary of ever since his dream, but with Caspian's words still singing into his ear he nodded. "I accept," he replied, gazing lustfully into the other's eyes as he lowered in on Edmund for yet another kiss.

A/N: I know it's been a long time since I've updated this story, and I apologise to those who felt as though this story had been abandoned due to this. However, I am here to assure you that it hasn't. I have had a few personal problems for the past year, and because of this writing became a struggle for me. Especially when it came to GYTM (Give Yourself To Me). I have a lot of plans for this story, some dark secrets I want to unfold as well as a few hot scenes *wink* but I can't promise that my updates will be fast and regular, I have a life outside of writing too! (sadly) Anyway, to those who have read this far and still send me messages and reviews asking about the story I want to say thank you for supporting me! It would be boring to write fanfic if there was nobody to share your stories with, etc. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and look forward to the next. I really love writing this story, but I am sorry if this chapter also seems to feel a bit rusty... It's been a long time. Below is a detailed message concerning a few reasons as to why updates have been delayed concerning GYTM and other stories I am writing, thank you.

.

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I have been writing this fanfic for quite a while now, and the story has developed shortly over the time in which I have written it. I still have many ideas as to how I can create a focused plotline in the story, in order to create a climax but the problem for me however, is writing it.
As some of you may already know, I was unable to update due to school, etc. And even so, now that I am done with school and have had three months off, I still didn't manage to update GYTM (Give Yourself To Me). I still love the story and as I said earlier, I have many ideas for more chapters but I just can't seem to write them. To any fellow writer's out there; I'm sure you know what I mean when I say this. For some reason, it just isn't flowing for me anymore and it has become difficult for me to write. Perhaps it is due to personal reasons, but even so, I still love writing and want to force myself into doing it.

If you do love the story and are patient, then I hope that when GYTM is continued you will be there.

Thank you, Jannasaur