Chapter Fourteen: Blood on Your Hands

Alistair scrambled to his feet, sword and shield at ready. The ogre charged at him and he managed to dodge and slice the tendons in the ogre's legs. It was a trick he'd discovered to easily kill an ogre; the only flaw was that it was difficult to find the perfect time to strike. The ogre's legs collapsed underneath it and swatted angrily at Alistair, sending him smashing into a tree. The wind was knocked out of him. He used his sword to push him back onto his feet, drawing in a deep breath. He walked over to the ogre who was trying to get back on its feet. He raised his sword and slammed it down into the ogre's back; the creature bellowed and thrashed around as Alistair twisted the sword, burying it deeper into its spine. It collapsed onto the ground again and Alistair withdrew his sword and plunged it into its skull, just to make sure that it died. He turned around as a new wave of darkspawn came at them. His heart sunk into his stomach. This couldn't be happening. He felt the memories of Ostagar flood back into his head…of the battle and the tower of Ishal, how Elissa and he had been completely overwhelmed by the darkspawn. The memories of the recent surprise attack were still raw and still scared him.

He searched the battle field for Kyra. Suddenly he spotted her…crouching on the ground. At first he thought that she was injured, but then he saw her lips moving.

"Kyra!" He shouted to her, running a hurlock through, but she didn't react. She was just crouching there, and the darkspawn were running past her, as if she was invisible. Suddenly many of the darkspawn in the area stiffened and fell quiet as if they had turned into stone. Then, in a horrible chorus, they let out howls and cries of agony. They still didn't move, but just stood in one place crying and howling in extreme pain. Alistair had no idea what was going on…and the sound that the darkspawn made…was most unnerving. Some of the darkspawn fell to the floor, dead, others stood fast. Alistair looked to Kyra who was standing up. He was about to call out to her, but then she turned to him. She held out her hands, and he could see that both palms were cut, and her eyes had rolled back into her skull, her mouth still moving. He watched as she walked closer him, and he could hear that she was saying. Alistair didn't understand the language that she was whispering in…it sounded old, some lost language or tongue…he didn't know.

Her whispering intensified and Alistair watched in horror as the whites of her eyes turned blood red. The sound of the darkspawn grew louder. Then tears started streaming down her face, tears of blood. The blood streamed down her cheeks and down her neck, but she kept on. Alistair turned to the darkspawn, they had begun bleeding from every orphic; nose, ears and eyes. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. The last darkspawn fell to the ground, their blood pooled around their bodies. The last ogre bellowed and beat the ground. Kyra turned her attention to it. She waved her hands and a blood red orb appeared between her hands. The ogre prepared to charge and Kyra released the spell. The orb surrounded the creature, almost like chains, and it instantly started screaking in pain. A strange smell filled the air and Alistair suddenly realized that it was burning flesh…the burning flesh of the ogre. The creature struggled, pointlessly, before crashing to the ground, deep burns all over its body. The few darkspawn that were left were quickly slaughtered. Alistair looked back at Kyra, who stood still and was still whispering to herself. He was still trying to figure out what had happened. Kyra fell to her knees as Alistair drew his sword out of the last darkspawn. Kyra looked around her, all the darkspawn were dead. She felt light-headed and her head spun. She heard the crunching of heavy boots on the soil, but didn't look up as she saw a drop of blood on the ground. She touched her nose and looked at the blood on her fingertips. Suddenly a hand wrapped around her wrist. She looked up…it was Alistair. He had a horrified and angry scowl on his face. He opened her hand and then the other, but she the cuts were gone, not even a scar; as if they had never been there. Kyra looked up at him, his eyes blazing with fury. He opened his mouth to say something, but was stopped by a gentle hand on his shoulder. He spun around. It was Wynne.

"Not now, Alistair," she said to him sternly. She motioned to him to see to the rest of his companions. Alistair looked back down at Kyra. The contempt on his face…if looks could kill, Kyra would have died tenfold.

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The night was cold and icy, like the atmosphere that hung over the group and the looks she received from them. No one dared hold eye contact with her for more than a few seconds. Even Oghren and Sten…ones that she thought didn't care for what the rest of the group thought. Alistair nor Wynne even acknowledged her presence. Even the Arl was wary of her…she had caught his eye for a moment and the look he had given her was not one of contempt or anger…but one of disappointment.

Kyra pulled the hood of her cloak over her head and drew the blankets in tighter around her. She sat on the far side of the bonfire, separating herself from the rest of the group. No one of the Arl's guards had survived the attack. They hadn't been trained to fight darkspawn, let alone ogres. Her body felt weak and empty, she was more mentally tired than physically. Her eyes hung heavy but sleep would not come easily for her tonight.

She watched as Morrigan stood up and walked over to her. Kyra was surprised as she sat down next to her, with a friendly smile on her face.

"That was quite a display today," She smiled, seemingly genuinely happy. Kyra didn't reply, she didn't really want to. She knew that the consequences would be severe and that she could possibly break any trust her new friends had in her.

"I always knew that you were capable of magic," Morrigan said, smirking, "But blood magic? Where did you learn this?"

"During my travels I met a magician, a man of optical illusions and slight of hand. But he was more than that. He was a blood mage. He never used his powers, only in times of dire need. He taught me how to do blood magic," Kyra turned to face Morrigan, "He taught me how to use blood magic, not to destroy, but how to protect yourself, how to heal yourself and others. He taught me how to use it for good."

"And that is exactly what you have done. You saved all our lives." Kyra just shook her head and looked over to Alistair. Morrigan scoffed.

"Do not bother yourself with them. They do not understand and cannot appreciate blood magic. Tis not the magic they fear, but the consequences of its use: the risk of turning into an abomination and losing control. That is what they truly fear."

"That won't happen…I take every possible measure against it."

Morrigan shrugged, "That is not to say it won't happen…but enough of that. Would you mind?" Morrigan pulled off the bandage Wynne had wrapped around her arm.

"Wynne is good at healing, but what you can do is extraordinary." Kyra did not mind helping. She picked up her dagger and cut her palm once more and placing it over Morrigan's wound. She closed her eyes and focused her energy. Moments later the wound was closed and all that was left was a scar. Morrigan ran her fingers over the skin, mesmerized.

"Tis truly amazing!" She smiled at Kyra, "Thank you, friend." Kyra was glad to see that she still had one person who was on her side. There was a commotion on the other side of camp, Kyra looked up and she could see Alistair disagree with Wynne over something. He gently pushed her aside and walked in her direction. Wynne gave an exasperated look. Kyra held Alistair's gaze as he marched up to her, an angry scowl across his face.

"Blood magic? This is what you've been hiding? From me, from all of us? Do you have any idea how dangerous it is?"

"You ungrateful fool!" Morrigan spat, standing up and confronting Alistair, "She saved your life, all if our lives! And this is how your repay her? By giving a moral lecture on things you know nothing of?"

"Hold your tongue, Morrigan, or maybe this time I shall cut it out."

"I should like to see you try, Warden." Morrigan's hand glowed red with a fireball.

"It's alright, Morrigan," Kyra stood up and touched her friend on the shoulder. Morrigan took the gesture as her sign to leave. She pushed passed Alistair, but not before giving him an icy glare.

"Bitch…" Alistair grumbled under his breath. Kyra bit her tongue.

"You lied to me, Kyra. You lied to all of us. Not only are you a thief, but an apostate, a mal…" Alistair looked away. He could bear to speak of it.

"I never lied to anyone! I did no such thing!"

"Well, you never told me about it either!"

"To avoid this very conversation that is why!"

"Do you even know how dangerous blood magic is?"

Kyra gritted her teeth, "Morrigan was right. Who are you to come and lecture me about blood magic? You know nothing of it!"

"I know enough!" Alistair shouted back, "I was there when the Circle of Magi was utterly destroyed by one blood mage! I watched as he turned his friends, his colleges into abominations! I listened to their cries of agony, of pain…and there was nothing I could do to help them, apart from driving my swords through their hearts and releasing them from the prison they had been put it. That is why the Templars and the Circle of Magi exist to ensure that mages do not get out of hand."

"So what? You think I'll control your mind and turn you into an abomination, hmm? What kind of person do you think me to be? I only use my powers to help others. I used it to heal Zevran's arm in the Brecilian Forest, to heal Leliana and Sten, to save your life, Alistair."

"You shouldn't be using it at all!"

It was like speaking to a wall! She spoke but her words just bounced off. Alistair refused to see reason, to even try and see it from her perspective.

"Then we all would have died and everything you have accomplished until now would have been in vain. Is that what you would have wanted?"

"No, of course not-"

"Then why are you even objecting to it?"

"Because it's dangerous, Kyra! That's why!"

She gritted her teeth again, closing her eyes, trying to rein in her frustration, but she couldn't. Alistair just didn't understand.

"So what if it is? It poses no risk to you! I saved your life, you should be more grateful! Perhaps next time I should just let the darkspawn maul you all!" Alistair just looked at her, stunned, "Perhaps if you weren't so blind with fear, Conor would still be alive."

"What?"

"It's because of your complete and utter dread of blood magic that Conor had to die. Isolde could have still saved him, but you wouldn't allow it. So Elissa had no choice, but to kill him."

Alistair's eyes flared and he marched right up to her. Kyra thought that he was going to hit her.

"You know nothing of what went on with Conor. Nothing!" He spat at her.

"Nothing?" She spun around and dug in her bag, "Read this and then tell me nothing!" She threw Elissa's diary at Alistair, hitting him and falling to the ground.

"You were the one who absolutely refused to have anything to do with blood magic! You blamed her for Conor's death, as if she actually had a choice! First enchanter Irving was dead and you refused to let her use blood magic. So she did what she thought was the right thing. And then you condemned her for it!" Kyra shouted in a fit of rage, "You blamed her and now you're blaming me."

Alistair was silent, flipping through the pages of the diary and going over the pages.

"I don't blame her…" He whispered, reading an entry, "I don't blame her…" He looked up at Kyra, his face ashen. She looked back at him, her fists still curled, still trying to calm herself. He looked back down at the diary in his hands, touching the faces.

"I…I didn't know she felt this way…"

"Then perhaps you should take your companions into greater consideration." Kyra watched as Alistair sat heavily down onto the ground, still shocked by the diary. She studied his sullen face and sad eyes and slowly felt the anger subside. She knew she'd been cruel to him…using his dead lover in their argument. Kyra sighed heavily and walked over to him. She kneeled down next to him and he looked up at her.

"I'm sorry that you disapprove so much of blood magic, but I did what I thought was right, Alistair. If I hadn't done what I did, we'd all be dead and gutted by the darkspawn. I'm only human…I'm only trying to do what was right…"

Alistair held her gaze for a few moments, before he solemnly nodded his head, turning his attention back to Elissa's diary. Kyra stood back up and turned to leave the man to himself.

"She loved you a great deal, Alistair," Kyra said, before she left, "She didn't blame you either and forgave you. She loved you more than you'll ever know."

Author's Notes: I'm so sorry for the delay in posting this chapter, but I had so many problems with the ending! Ugh. Even now I'm not satisfied with this ending. The beginning was fine, but I just couldn't get the ending to play out as I wanted it to.

I apologize!