What I own: A University of Houston hoodie, the newest and most feels breaking MCR album and an ugly though ridiculously comfortable comforter.
What I don't: Rookie Blue. Nope, not mine. I just like to play in Tassie Cameron's sandbox. I promise my poor self with clean everyone up and return them when I am done. Maybe.
Author's Note: Hey y'all, I am so sorry this took so long to get to you. Between being sick as a dog and drugged up because of said sickness, I haven't really been able to string two words together, much less write anything decent. And y'all deserve more than just decent because YOU ARE AMAZING, EVERY ONE OF YOU. This was supposed to be lots longer, but I had to take said brain fuzz inducing medication. Marys your request will take place in the next chapter, pinky promise with whipped cream, sprinkles and cherries on top… though not really cause messy. (Although the idea is not a completely bad one. I could have some fun with that.) This is my second attempt at finishing this chapter off, the first one vanished as I tried to upload it because words hates me. I cannot even. Anyway! This is totally un beta'd, Janeycakes, my master beta extraordinaire, fixes all my shifty tenses and mistakes because she is amazing like that. All mistakes are mine, mine, mine. As always, reviews make me smile like a movie star and are rewarded with sneak peeks of the next chapter and ridiculous babble. Questions, comments and song suggestions are always welcome, come find me on twitter, I don't bite, I promise.
The room was filled with giggles and the excited, if not entirely sensical chatter of my new pint sized friend, who stayed on Sam's lap for the duration of our visit. She still quieted as soon as anyone else came in the room, refusing to speak to both Dr. Reed and Claire, although she did give nurse Shay a small, shy smile when she came up from the ER to check in which was improvement in some way.
This tiny girl seemed to have us both mesmerized as she spoke, hand fluttering here and there, touching Sam's arm, brushing my hair out of my eyes, fiddling with the ribbons that I had slipped into my pocket the day before. I didn't hide my smile when she asked me if I could put them in her hair for her, and received on in kind from Sam as I knelt beside the chair they were both seated on.
"Did you want both of them in, or just one?" My voice was soft as I raked my fingers through the tangled mahogany curls that hung down her back, gently untangling them until they lay flat.
I couldn't see the expression on her face as she spoke but Sam's spoke volumes, a bright grin that made me thankful I wasn't standing or my knees may very well have gone weak.
"Just one, cause then you can have the other." The tears DID come this time and I was glad her back was to me as my vision misted over.
"That-that sounds perfect." My voice cracked as I spoke but I don't think my tiny companion was any wiser as she continued to prattle to my partner about her school, and her favorite color. I twisted her hair into a loose French braid, securing the end with a length of the purple ribbon.
"There we go sweet girl." The endearment slipped out before I could stop it and I mentally cursed myself as I rose and sat back on the edge of the bed.
"Is it pretty? Can you do yours the same way? Is it like a princess Mr. Sam?" The questions came rapid fire although I could see her try and hide a yawn.
Sam gave a low laugh and nodded at Grace who still had not left her spot on his lap. "Yes Grace, it is very pretty and you look just like a princess. Belle I think."
I somehow didn't laugh at his knowledge of Disney Princess, but filed the tidbit away for future use as I quickly plaited my own hair, pulling the tail of the braid over my shoulder and fastening the end with the other piece of ribbon.
"All set. We're matching now. What do you think?" Twisting around, I showed the hasty hairdo to Grace and Sam, by default, the former giving a soft gasp.
"You're like a princess too Andy!" The words were a bit softer than before, though no less excited, and I watched as she hid another yawn. "You has a dress and everything."
Laughing, I brushed a stray curl out of her eyes and tucked it behind her ear. "I do indeed. You seem to be getting tired Miss Grace, did you want to take a nap?"
Her eyes grew wide and she shook her head emphatically. "I'm not tired though, 'sides, if I nap than you and Mr. Sam will go away."
"That sounds like a plan. How bout this? You lay down and nap for just a little while and then Sam and I will come back after you wake up, is that okay?" My eyes darted between Sam and Grace, silently asking if it was okay. The small nod I received in return was all the answer I needed from Sam, and within moments I received a matching on from Grace. "Okay then, you get settled down and we will come back tonight, promise." I watched as Sam gently ran his hand over Grace's small back and her eyelids began to slowly droop, her head resting on his shoulder.
"Okay Andy. Promises that you'll come back?" The words were almost a whisper as Grace started to fall asleep in Sam's arms.
"I promise sweetie, we'll come back as soon as we can." It was true, we would. I couldn't bear the thought of this small girl left alone in this cold, noisy sterile place. No matter how cheerfully it was decorated, of how many people came in and out, she was still by herself for the duration.
"Kay." The word was expelled in a soft puff of air against Sam's shoulder as her eyes finally closed. I caught Sam's gaze and tilted my head towards the empty bed as I rose and turned down the sheets and blankets. I watched, oddly mesmerized as my partner stood, cradling the tiny girl in his arms, and lay her down on the bed so very gently, before tucking the blankets up under her chin. I hadn't ever seen him really interact with children before, not outside of a moment or two at work, and it was almost a shock to see how tender he was. I knew that he had both a niece and a nephew so it really shouldn't surprise me, but I still couldn't bring myself to look away from the oddly domestic scene in front of me.
His hand on my bare shoulder pulled me out of my reverie, and I felt my cheeks flush as I met Sam's dark eyes, watching as they twinkled with mirth. Tilting his head silently towards the door, I gave him a smile and exited the room as quietly as I could, his hand on my back as we headed into the hall, the door sliding shut behind us.
"She really is the sweetest thing." I took a last peek through the window at the sleeping child as we headed down the hallway. "I think-"
"Andrea." My words to Sam were cut off by Claire, whose presence I had managed to put out of my mind for a moment, as she stepped out from behind the desk, following us down the hall. I froze at the sound, stiffening beneath Sam's touch and we both turned.
"Yes?" My voice was colder than I had anticipated and I saw confusion flash across Sam's face before I returned my gaze to my mother.
"I just… my card, in case you find anything out." I took the small rectangle that she held out, accepting it with barely a glance before dropping it into my purse and retrieving one of my own.
"Likewise." The atmosphere between the two of us was chilly, to say the least, my own voice almost icy as I turned away and headed towards the elevators without another word.
The ride back to Sam's was brief and quiet, though not uncomfortably so. We had been through far too much together, knew each other too well and trusted each other enough that silence wasn't going to be an issue. Sam knew when to push, and when to hold back, now obviously being a time for the latter.
I stared blankly out the window watching the scenery as it passed, lost in my own thoughts. Everything seemed so… normal; children skipped rope on lush green grass, their peals of delighted laughter barely audible through the closed windows of the truck, a Golden Retriever fetched a tennis ball before returning to her master, once bare branches hung heavy with blooms in the most delicate shades of pink, the hues looking almost unnatural in the bright sunlight.
It was an absolutely gorgeous summer day, the sun shining brightly in a clear blue sky but I was freezing. Not physical, of course, not at all. My skin was still warm from the brief walk across the parking lot, though my now are feet, sandals discarded as soon as I had entered the truck, were just this side of cold as they rested on the dash, the artificially chilled air pumping from the vents going quite a ways to cooling both of us down.
I stared out the window, the meeting in the tiny room running through my mind on repeat. I'd long ago given up any hope that I would see Claire again, and had made peace with that fact. She was, for the most part, nothing but a memory. She didn't even recognize me, though that was not a surprise as she had been gone for over half of my life.
I was so caught up in my thoughts, in the racing, endless cycle of images that played across my mind that I didn't even notice that the truck had stopped and been turned off until Sam rested his hand on my bare shoulder, pulling me out of my reverie with a gentle touch, his thumb just brushing over my skin.
"You okay McNally?" His voice was low, the concern evident behind the simple words.
"I'm fine." I nodded just slightly and gave him what I was sure was a very fake smile, knowing immediately that he wouldn't believe me. Leaning down, I gathered both my discarded sandals and purse before opening the door and hopping out of the truck. The asphalt was hot under my bare feet, but not painfully so, just enough to ground me as it were. I danced across the drive and hopped up the steps, waiting nervously for Sam to follow.
He did, in just a moment, and quickly punched in the lock code, pushing the door open and ushering me inside with a small wave.
I entered the cool house, thankful for the central air and drawn blinds. My eyes quickly adjusted to the dim lighting and I set my sunglasses on the small hall table, dropping my shoes beside it.
Sam entered and quickly shut the door, bolting it behind him and setting the alarm code before turning towards me, catching my eyes. I fidgeted under his intense gaze but refused to drop my eyes as he watched me. Studying me, taking in my tics and obvious discomfort.
"You wanna talk about it?" The words were just this side of a whisper and I considered them for a moment. Did I want to talk about it? No, not even a little bit. Did I need to talk about it? Absolutely, more than anything else. But I couldn't, not now. Not yet. Steeling my spine, I tilter my chin up and shook my head just slightly.
"Nope." The word was barely out of my mouth before I moved, closing the distance between us with just a few strides. My hands rested on Sam's shoulders and I pushed him backwards against the wall, not hard but not exactly gently, before my arms twined around his neck and I met his lips in a heated kiss.