A/N: Ryou is a huge angst-muffin in this one. Silly boy. Just accept Kaoru's love and give in. But no, Ryou's too stubborn for that.

Disclaimer: If I owned .Hack…Endrance would be the ONLY marriage option for Haseo, because I am that much of a fangirl.

The thought haunted Ryou throughout the weekend. He found himself unable to look Kaoru in the eyes, unable to demand that he eat. The feeling of guilt was too strong. What right did he have to ask anything of Kaoru, even for his own good, when he had already proved that he was too selfish to consider Kaoru's feelings?

When Kaoru's touched his shoulder and stroked his cheek, Ryou didn't have the heart to fight him off. And he couldn't answer when Kaoru begged him to tell him what was wrong. He regretted making Kaoru worry, but he kept silent. How could he put into words that he wasn't worthy of Kaoru's love? When they parted on Sunday, Kaoru seemed especially distressed and he clung to Ryou, his eyes welling with tears as he demanded to know what had happened between them. Ryou had to peel him off with difficulty when the train arrived.

By Wednesday, Ryou had finally sorted through his internal turmoil and had come to a conclusion. But he still didn't trust his own mind. He hated himself and the weakness in his heart. He needed a second opinion, someone who would listen to his concerns and give him advice on how to go on. Pi would have been the logical choice, but he couldn't bear the thought of having to hear her tell him that he was only in such a mess because he had refused to listen to her the first time. And then he remembered the messages he had exchanged with Kuhn about living on his own. Kuhn was in his twenties, just old enough to have experience, but not too old to be completely out of touch. And while Kuhn probably wasn't the best to turn to for relationship advice, Ryou knew at least that he'd be approachable and willing to listen. His mind set, he invited both of them into his party.

He didn't have long to wait before Endrance arrived. "Haseo," he breathed. "Where we will go today?"

Ryou avoided Endrance's eager expression. "We have to wait a second. I invited Kuhn to come with us."

If Kaoru was upset about having a third party member, Endrance certainly didn't show it. "We will be able to take on more difficult areas with his assistance," Endrance said. "We will level up more easily."

"Hey, Haseo. I'm ready to go whenever you….oh." Kuhn had been running towards the warp portal, but now he slowed to a cautious walk. "Hey, you didn't tell me you were dragging me along on your date."

"This isn't a date," Haseo snapped. "It's…it's complicated, alright? Just come on." He crossed his arms defensively over his chest.

Kuhn chuckled, but he went along willingly enough as Haseo punched in the area words for a mid-level cloudy field.

"So, anybody want to fill me in?" Kuhn asked as soon as they warped in. "We're not going to get in a lot of experience here."

"I need to talk to you," Haseo said.

"If you're going to make a sudden declaration of love, it better be to him." Kuhn pointed in Endrance's direction with his thumb, his eyes dancing with mischief.

"Cut it out," Haseo growled. "This is serious." He regretted asking Kuhn along, knowing the man's penchant for teasing.

"Alright, alright." Kuhn laced his hands behind his head. "I'm all ears, Haseo. What do you want to talk about?"

Haseo's eyes settled briefly on Endrance. "Remember when you and Pi showed up to yell at me for not being online? She told me that I shouldn't get involved with Endrance, that I would only hurt him."

"You could never hurt me," Endrance said quietly, moving to Haseo's side.

"I wouldn't try to," Haseo said, "but it could happen. What if I became one of the Lost Ones?"

"Then I would stay at your side until you woke up, even if it would be an eternity. I would never leave you."

Endrance reached out to touch his cheek and Haseo backed away. "This is exactly what I'm worried about. I'm the only person you care about it. It'll destroy you if anything happens to me." Ryou took a deep breath, hating what he had to do. "That's why I need you to move on. You need to free yourself to make relationships with other people so you're not always so attached to me."

Endrance pulled his hands protectively to his chest. "You don't like me anymore?"

"I like you just fine. That's why I have to do this. I don't want you to get hurt." He looked to Kuhn for support. "Isn't it better to separate now before we get too involved?"

Kuhn scratched the back of his head. "I think it's a little late for that."

Haseo bristled. "What are you talking about?"

Kuhn smirked and shook his head slowly. "You really don't know, do you? Man, you are oblivious sometimes."

Haseo crossed his arms over his chest and narrowed his eyes. "I'm oblivious? Who was the idiot who was trying to hit on a little girl?"

Kuhn sputtered and reddened. "How was I supposed to know? Everyone looks different online. I mean, my hair doesn't look like this offline." He tugged at a shock of bright blue hair. "My boss at the arcade would kill me."

"Take it easy," Haseo said. "I was just kidding around."

"And your boyfriend," Kuhn said. "I know he doesn't wear that purple outfit in real life."

"He's not my boyfriend," Haseo reminded him.

"Because you're breaking up with him."

"Yes. It's for the-I mean, no!" Haseo's eyes narrowed. "Damn it, Kuhn. We can't break up if we were never together."

Kuhn grinned. "Come on, Haseo. Quit being such a stick in the mud. Stop worrying about AIDA just this once. We'll have to fight again soon enough, but there's no sense letting your worry overwhelm you." He clapped Haseo on the back and gave him a push towards Endrance. "Live a little."

Haseo reddened and looked away. "I can't," he said. "I can't be like you, chasing after everyone that catches my eye without regards to their feelings."

Kuhn frowned. "Haseo, that wasn't-"

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have put it like that." Haseo looked down, his fist clenched, his body shaking. "I just can't do this anymore. I can't hurt Endrance."

"Endrance loves you, idiot. Everyone knows that. You'd have to be deaf and blind to miss it."

"I know," Haseo growled. "And I'm not capable of that kind of love. I have to leave him now before he gets too attached to me."

Kuhn sighed. "You heard how I was once guild-master of Canard, right? I gave it up when we started fighting AIDA. I didn't want Silabus and Gaspard involved. I thought if I distanced myself from them, they'd be protected and that somehow, they'd get over being abandoned." He shook his head. "They might have forgiven me, but I don't think I've ever forgiven myself. You see, Haseo, sometimes when you try to protect someone from pain, you only hurt yourself."

Haseo lifted his chin defiantly. "It's better for me to be hurt than one of my friends."

Kuhn placed a hand on one hip. "You really are stubborn, Haseo. But I don't think you can go through with this. You're more involved than you think you are." He stepped behind Endrance and put a hand on his shoulder. "Go on, Haseo. Tell him what he needs to hear so that he'll know his love will never stand a chance. Tell him that there will be no more offline meetings, no more adventures together, that the two of you will exist as members of G.U. and nothing more. Tell him that you feel sick when he tries to touch you, that you'd rather die than-"

"Kuhn!" Haseo gasped out, horrified. "How can I say that to him?'

He looked desperately at Endrance. The blade brandier stood rigidly, his arms stiffly at his side, his face a marble mask. "If you never want to see me again, I will respect your wishes," he said, a faint tremor in his smooth voice. "But I will never stop loving you, Haseo. Nothing you can say will ever change my feelings for you."

Haseo groaned. "Endrance, please."

"I don't think you're trying hard enough," Kuhn said. "You have to convince him you hate him now."

"And I suppose you told Silabus and Gaspard that you hated them when you left?" Ryou wanted to punch Kuhn right in the jaw. His hand itched for conflict. He couldn't believe what Kuhn wanted him to do. All this time he had thought of Kuhn as an easygoing skirt-chaser, but only cruel and calloused things were coming out of his mouth. Ryou wanted to be sick looking at him.

Kuhn shrugged indifferently. "I just left. I was too much of a coward to tell them anything." Kuhn tipped his head to one side, his eyes darkening. "But you don't have that option. You and Endrance will be fighting together. And he'll want answers. He won't stop asking until you tell him. If you don't have the courage to break his heart now, he'll keep begging and pleading with you until you either give in and take him back or until you break-"

"Shut up!" Haseo snarled. He drew his scythe and swung it in a wide circle. Endrance moved to the right and Kuhn jumped left. Haseo advanced towards Kuhn, his eyes still blazing. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Haseo, please," Endrance said. "Kuhn is our ally."

"Quiet, Kaoru." Haseo paused momentarily, realizing how deeply his anger had affected him. "Endrance," he began again. "Stay out of this. We'll talk later. Right now this asshole needs to die."

Kuhn backed away as Haseo raised his scythe. He looked afraid. Good.

"Haseo, you can't let your anger get the best of you." Endrance's hand caressed Haseo's cheek.

"Weren't you listening to what he said, what he wanted me to do? How could I possibly protect you by hurting you with hateful words? I love you too much to cause you pain, even if it's for your own good."

"Haseo," Endrance said, his face filled with rapturous joy. "Do you really mean that?"

"Hell yes, I do. I'm going to kill that mother….oh, damnit. Did I say that last part out loud?" Ryou felt himself redden all the way to the tips of his ears. He really needed to control his temper. There was no telling what he'd say in the throes of anger.

Kuhn grinned and leaned against Endrance. "Well, it looks like you passed the test. I was getting a little worried there for a second, but you made it."

"Test? Goddamn it, Kuhn, was this all some game to you?"

"You're awfully stubborn, Haseo. I had to do something to get you to realize your feelings." Kuhn ruefully rubbed the back of his head. "I may not have thought through that plan very well, but it worked and that's what counts."

Ryou tried to block out Kuhn's self-satisfied smirk and Endrance's joyful smile. "Come on, you guys. Be reasonable. This is still not going to work out. Endrance loves me too much. I'm the only person he's ever cared about and I can't possibly say the same."

"I understand, Haseo," Endrance said softly. "So many people look up to you and you can't help but reach out to them. But just knowing that I am loved and needed by you is all I ever ask."

Kuhn chuckled. "Aww, isn't that the cutest? Is he like this offline, too?"

Ryou sighed gloomily. "Exactly like this."

"Damn. I don't know why you're so stubborn. You've got a guy swooning over you 24/7. If I had a girl that devoted, I don't think I'd ever get out of bed." Kuhn waggled his eyebrows suggestively and Ryou felt himself redden again.

"It's not like that," he said.

"Sure it's not," Kuhn said, sounding completely unconvinced.

Ryou gritted his teeth. "I don't get why you're so happy about me dating Endrance anyway."

Kuhn shrugged. "I had a feeling something like this would happen sooner or later. You crazy kids are more alike than you think. And besides," he flashed a wide grin, "there will be quite a few ladies with broken hearts when they hear that you're taken. It'll be unbearable witnessing so much sorrow, but I'll do my best to comfort all the women I can."

Ryou rolled his eyes. "Of course you will," he said. "But you can't tell anyone yet, especially Pi. She's going to have my head if she hears."

"Not going to say a word," Kuhn said. "But you know this isn't going to stay secret forever."

"I know," Haseo said. "But for now, we want everyone thinking we're just friends."