My dear readers,

I owe you two apologies, first for the delay (though in fairness to me, I have acquired a boyfriend and a cat), and second for the shortness for this chapter. I'll try to be better about updating in the future.

Love,

LaBelleABoisDormant

While Mr. Collins droned on about his (and Lady de Bourg's) beliefs about childrearing, Darcy tracked the footprints from where they entered the woods to the old cottage in the woods. Well, he thought, I'm glad I had to wait to show Lizzy this place. She's certainly not coming out here in the near future.

He tied his horse to the tree and crept to the window of the main room. Words were not adequate enough to describe his shock at seeing his young sister-in-law making a half-hearted attempt to clean the room, muttering what were clearly complaints about having to do housework.

If she is here, HE must be here. But why? What can he stand to gain? He's married, Lizzy is married, he knows I won't give him so much as a pebble from my shoe, and we both know that if he gives Georgie even a funny look I'm within my rights to kill him. As Darcy pondered all of this, Lydia picked up her bucket of dirty water and walked to the door to throw it out into the yard, and he had an idea. Lydia may not be the brightest girl, but she would certainly know more than he did, and if he knew her, it wouldn't be all that hard to get her to tell him.

"Lydia, my dear sister, I must take offense with you. For you are so close to my home, and yet you do not call. What have I done to offend you, and how might I try to rectify it?"

Lydia jumped out of her self-absorbed reverie to see her handsome, wealthy brother-in-law bowing to her and asking what he might offer her. Having been told by Wickham that she was in Scotland, she couldn't have been more surprised to see the man, let alone to hear she was near his home. Quick if not witty, she was fast to recover.

"Why, Mr. Darcy!" She smiled and leaned forward to show what cleavage she could in her cleaning clothes (which was admittedly an impressive amount), "How could someone as wonderful as you have possibly offended me?"

"Well, surely, there must be some reason you are staying in the woods of Pemberley and have not even deigned to grace my halls with your delightful presence?" Darcy found himself wondering for the first time if he could have been a successful actor had his life gone another way.

"The woods of…Pemberley? I'm near Pemberley? I could've been staying in a real house, not this hovel?" Darcy tried not to show his offense that the cottage he had loved as a boy and was excited to show his wife—after the birth of their child—was being referred to as a 'hovel' and focus on his current goal, tricking his sister-in-law into returning to his house and telling him everything she knew. He couldn't imagine the latter would take long. "Why, Mr. Darcy, you've done nothing to offend, of course…I'm sure we thought we were in another woods…."

"If I have done nothing to offend, surely you would not oppose returning to the house with me? I'm sure we could provide you with better comfort."

"Of course, my dear Mr. Darcy! Simply let me change my clothes, I'm sure these will not due for such an illusterious house." Darcy nodded and tried not to cringe at the mispronunciation. He followed her into the main room of the house, seated himself, and prayed she would change uncharacteristically quickly so that they could leave.