Fourteen: A Chance

When lunch came, he avoided the canteen and grabbed a sandwich then headed out onto the football field, out into the cold wind because he needed to be alone. There was a a small sheltered space under the bleachers where he and Cami had kissed and cuddled during the summer before vacation and it was there he headed, sitting back against a heavy supporting strut and pulling out his phone. Silently, he thumbed down the menu and then clicked on the video, his breath hitching at the sight of the two figures swirling in their joyous dance.

"I'll swim and sail on savage seas..."

Astrid was looking for Hiccup, not because she liked him-and she was still sore at his reaction when she had offered him some sympathy the previous week-but because he had looked really down. It was clear that singing the song that meant so much to his parents had been very difficult for him but he had done a good job and his performance had really helped them all appreciate the song. It was clear it was meant for two singers as a sung conversation but he had performed both parts well. And Snotlout and the twins had been foul to him during the next three classes.

She had seen him head out and she pulled on her coat, then went looking for him. She guessed he would want somewhere private so she headed for the bleachers because there were any number of places a person could hide away there. But he was relatively easy to find, a huddled shape sitting with his back to a stanchion and his knees drawn up, staring at his phone. As she watched, he absently palmed his face, wiping away unseen tears and then he bowed his head, pulled his hood up to conceal his face and clutched the phone to his face. And she knew exactly what he had been watching because he had told them earlier-the video of his parents at their wedding reaffirmation ceremony. She paused, not wanting to intrude-and then she groaned as she saw a group of people heading directly for him. Snotlout, Thuggory and Eret were first, followed by the twins, Cami and even Heather, all bearing down on the desolate and probably very vulnerable shape of Hiccup.

He didn't see them coming, lost in his little world of misery until he was surrounded. She saw Thuggery kick him twice, quite suddenly and he tried to stumble to his feet but was pushed back savagely by Snotlout, who was instantly in his face. She moved closer and winced as she heard them all attacking him.

"Whatcha doing, Useless? Crying over your Mommy?" Eret sneered.

"How pathetic are you?" Cami scorned. "I mean, you're almost eighteen! Why are you so weak?"

"And just so you know, Useless-Mom and Dad can't possibly offer you a home," Snotlout told him. "I mean, you're lucky he didn't call the cops for your unprovoked attack on us after the match of Friday!" Hiccup looked up, red-rimmed eyes flashing with anger.

"Yeah-but then they would have to talk to me as well and you don't want them asking why you were there-or why we were fighting, do you?" he sneered. "And Cami-you ought to learn that if you're not good enough, you work hard to be better. You don't try to eliminate the opposition! And for the record, the Coach wouldn't pick you anyway!"

Astrid stiffened. The words seemed horribly familiar and she felt the unwelcome curl of fear in her chest. What had been going on?

"Were you eavesdropping, Hiccup?" Cami taunted him. "So jealous of Snot that you have to stalk me?" He stared up at her and shook his head.

"Much as it hurts, Cameron, I think you've proved that only one of us cared for the other in that relationship," he said tonelessly. "But I have to think about what's in it for me. And being abused and exploited by a shallow, vain, lazy, vicious, selfish bitch isn't my definition of a happy relationship. So I'll pass. Snot-you're welcome to her!"

"Why you scrawny little fishbone!" Snotlout sneered, ignoring the fact that Hiccup topped him by half a head. "You apologise this instant or..."

"Or what?" Hiccup snarked, his eyes flashing with anger. "You'll attack me? How do you think the Principal will view that one? Last time you claimed poor widdle Snottykins was beaten up by mean ole' Hiccup despite his two friends holding me helpless. Now there's seven of you-so how will you explain this one?"

"I think you'll find no one will support your story and no one was here...except you and me...and you threw the first punch again..." Snotlout threatened, hauling Hiccup up by the neck. He threw him back against the stanchion. "Now apologise..."

"Please don't," Ruff cut in. "It'll be much more amusing!"

"Yeah-I wanna see you take on Snot, Thug and Eret all at once!" Tuff added, a malicious grin on his face. "That would be almost worth paying for..." Hiccup glanced up, breathing hard.

"I'll even give you the first hit," Snotlout taunted him, tapping his chin with a finger. "Go on...you know you want to..."

"Not in the mood right now, Snot," Hiccup retorted. "Maybe you could come back tomorrow? I may be feeling suicidal then..."

"We're doing this now!" Thuggory growled and shoved Hiccup back again. "What is it, Hicc? You a coward? That must be galling for your parents to know their kid is a yellow-bellied gutless fishbone..." Bitting his lip against the instinctive fury he felt at the insult, Hiccup faced the larger boy with a scowl, fists balled.

"First, my parents can't know anything because they're dead, Thug and second-a fishbone by definition has no guts so do you want to try a better metaphor? Or go away and read up what a metaphor is?"

"Gutless wonder," Ruff sneered. "Knew it. He was always hiding behind his Daddy and now he doesn't have him, he's nothing!" That cut pretty close to the bone and he couldn't help the flinch.

"None of you complained when it suited you to have the Mayor's son as your friend," he forced out. "I did everything for you guys. How long after my parents died did even one of you consider being an actual friend or was it all about what was in it for you?" Snotlout picked at his nails pointedly.

"Power talks, Useless," he smirked. "Now, where were we?" Thug and Eret shoved him back and the others stepped back to give them room as Hiccup felt his breathing accelerate. He was still bruised and sore from the previous Friday and facing the three of them this time was going to go far worse than even he could imagine...

"HICCUP! Thank Thor I found you! Principal Wing is looking for you! I've been sent to fetch you!" Astrid came running up, her cheeks flushed and instantly, the boys backed away from Hiccup, leaving him looking shocked and alarmed as he stared at her.

"Better not keep the Principal waiting," Heather advised him coldly and he pushed away from the stanchion, walking as if in a daze through the gang, all glaring at him.

"Yeah-your girlfriend came just in time," Eret sneered and Astrid stiffened.

"She's not..." Hiccup began but she turned and began to march away, her braid bouncing on her shoulder as she strode angrily.

"Are you coming?" she snapped. There were sniggers.

"Whipped!" Tuff commented loudly enough for everyone to hear and Hiccup felt the heat warm his cheeks but he followed Astrid without comment until they were out of earshot of the gang.

"I never said we..." he began urgently but she cast him a sideways glance.

"I heard," she snapped. "What has been going on, Hiccup?" She stopped and turned to face him. He gestured to the school building.

"Um...won't Principal Wing be mad if we...?" He began but she shook her head.

"That was just to get you away from those idiots!" she snapped. "Now tell me about last Friday..." He sagged.

"Nothing happened last Friday," he insisted stubbornly. She pointed to his face.

"Yeah-it looks like it," she commented. "But why am I concerned that it had something to do with me?" His eyes widened.

"I-I never..." he stammered.

"I heard," she reminded him sternly. "So spill, Hiccup. What is going on?" He stared at her and then nodded.

"Okay," he conceded. "But not here..." He gestured discreetly towards where the gang were and she nodded.

"Okay," she said. "You know where I work?" He nodded. "Come along at half past five and you can explain there." He stared at her for a long moment.

"I can't afford a meal," he admitted after an awkward moment and she sighed.

"I can stand you a soda, Hiccup-if you explain what happened." He nodded.

"It's a date," he murmured and then looked up at her, his eyes grateful. "And Astrid...?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for the save."

"You're welcome."

oOo

It was with no small trepidation that Hiccup arrived at the diner, knowing his previous time here had ended in him being thrown out and banned. He wondered if Astrid recalled that or if she had gained him some special dispensation to come in. Or maybe this was her revenge, making him come up here to be humiliatingly thrown out. It would serve him right if she did but he really really hoped she hadn't because he was hoping that maybe she would treat him like a real person. It was miserable, being ignored and whispered about or teased every lesson of every day and it was only his stubborn desire to gain the High School Diploma his father would have expected that kept him in school. That and the bone-headed determination to annoy Snotlout and show him and his shallow friends that he wasn't broken.

But he was, in a way. Seeing his parents laughing, dancing and singing in the video had torn through the thin scabs covering his wounded heart and he was grieving all over again. He needed them, almost like a craving and it hurt that he would never be hugged again, never have anyone who would care for him unconditionally, never have anyone who would love him without bounds. And he hated himself because he was a Haddock, a descendent of Vikings and should be beyond all this pathetic nonsense...but the truth was, he missed his parents and would have given his life for one more hour with them, for the chance to ask for their forgiveness and hug them once more.

He walked cautiously into the diner and saw Astrid at work, so he hovered by the door, looking awkward and out of place, running his hand self-consciously through his messy auburn hair until she saw him. She flashed him a small smile and gestured to a tiny corner booth, where he sat and was brought a small glass of soda.

"My break is in ten minutes," she told him. "We can talk then..." He nodded and watched her walk away, dipping to attend to an elderly couple who were still humming and ha-ing at the menu. She smiled and was generous and brisk but never rude and she served everyone with deft precision. Finally, she slid into the seat opposite him, a glass of water clutched in her hand. Her azure eyes were determined.

"Wow-you never let up," he blurted out and she rolled her eyes.

"Spill!" she demanded. His eyes widened and he sipped his soda worriedly. There really was only one choice-and he really hoped she wouldn't freak out. He had to tell Astrid the truth. So calmly and clearly, he went though everything he had heard, everything he said and everything he did. And finally he recounted his encounter with the Principal and the penalty he was paying. And through it all, Astrid stared at him.

"So...um...sorry," he finished.

"Why?" she whispered. He sagged.

"It's it obvious?" he asked her wearily. She shook her head, her azure gaze searching his face.

"No, it's not," she said flatly and he sagged.

"Look-much as I loved Cami back then, I told her not to set Dagur on you," he sighed. "It was something so horrendous and extreme that even being the spoilt rich kid couldn't excuse it. But she did it anyway...and I lied to the cops to cover for her because she was my girlfriend and I believed that she loved me. I hoped...I could persuade her that she should be a better person rather than just taking what she wanted."

"Why? That was what you did-all the time!" she snapped. He shuddered.

"I know-and I also knew it was something that upset my Dad," he sighed. "He was a great man, selfless and conscientious and hard-working and I...well, I disappointed him. I had become something he didn't like from being friends with my...well, ex-friends. And he died being disappointed with me and not liking who I was. And I can never make that better. But I have to try for me, because otherwise..." He stared at the table and tapped his fingers on the smooth surface for a long moment. "Otherwise I won't be able to live with myself. I want to believe that somewhere...maybe Valhalla, I hope...he will be looking down on me and one day he'll smile and say 'That's my boy!' without feeling ashamed at what he's seeing."

She blinked. It was the last confession she had expected from the selfish, often cruel and self-absorbed young man Hiccup was. Or had been. And she knew all too well the myriad of what-ifs and could-have-beens that came with losing a parent too early and far too suddenly. At least she still had her Mom to help her through: Hiccup didn't seem to have anyone.

"So...when I heard her want to try again, want them to ambush you and...well, hurt you badly for nothing more than being a better player-and better person-than Cami will ever be, I couldn't stand by and walk away."

"But you got hurt," she said softly, staring at the dark bruises on his face and the scab on his split lip. He quirked a small smile.

"I'm a Haddock. It's an occupational hazard," he offered and then looked shocked when she burst out laughing. "What?" His tone was a little hurt but she was helpless.

"Did-did you listen to what you just said?" she gasped. He reran the words in his mind and then smiled.

"Oops," he smirked. "Hmm...that didn't come out how I planned it in my mind..."

"No shit," she smiled and looked into his face. Despite his bruises, he was still a good-looking young man with his sparkling emerald eyes and casually tousled hair and there was something more attractive about him when he had dropped his stupid pretensions as the 'Mayor's Son'. "Look, Hiccup-what I said last week...well, it still stands. I know what it's like to lose a parent and I know how hard it is. I know all the things you wish you'd done and said-and all the things you wished you hadn't. And the sense of missing them all the time. So if you need to talk, you can call me..." She scribbled her number down on a paper napkin. "Or you could just come here. I've removed your ban-but you'll have to pay for your own sodas. The wages aren't that great I can pay all the time..." He gave a genuine smile.

"Thanks, Astrid," he said gratefully. "I-I'd like that." She stared into his face and sighed.

"You don't have to be alone, Hiccup," she told him. "And-and if you wanna hang with us in school...you're welcome." His eyes widened and he nodded.

"That would be...really nice," he admitted. "Thanks, Astrid!" She grinned.

"Now-back to work," she said, draining her glass. "Will you be okay?" He nodded.

"Haddocks are tough," he admitted and handed her the soda glass. "See you tomorrow?"

"It's a date."