Wewt, and we have come to the final conclusion with all these thoughts stuff.
CONGRATULATIONS READERS~ WE CAN FINALLY ALL GET BACK TO THE STORY...after this chapter. Maybe if I'm happy, I'll even upload the next one REALLY REALLY SOON...like in a couple of days instead of a full week. WEEEE~ and for all that, you all get a cookie :3
This chapter is like the last, and focuses more on Arisa, in Athrun's POV~
Today's song is "My Hands" (From Final Fantasy XIII :DDDDDD) by Leona Lewis. WHEEE~ (Yush, I am very very hyper todaiii~)
Disclaimer: I do not own GSD because if I did, I would have the dub version of Lacus have a better and prettier voice D: (I think her voice sounds weird D:)
Chapter Bonus [Athrun]
The war was nothing more than blood and tears for many.
At least that's what it was like.
But even so, why did join the war? Why did I even bother to fight if I knew what it was going to be like? Why did I even both to stay in the war then? Shouldn't I have left?
And especially since there's this second war.
A second war is the same is it not?
Another battle.
Which means more and more bloodshed.
I joined the war, to get rid of time.
I joined to war due to my father's wishes. I had to no choice to listen to him. He was the chairman of the Plants after all. His word was absolute. His word was law. He was a man that everyone respected here, everyone had thought he was a good chairman after all. I even believed in his words at the beginning.
I hated that man now.
Of course I had to obey him. If I didn't, I could be sent to prison, or be under house suspension. That's the basic jist of everything. I had to listen to him whether I wanted to or not.
But everything was his fault.
Everything.
My mother.
And that last war.
I put all of the blame onto him.
Because I knew…knew so many things others didn't, simply because he was my father.
He had planned to blow up Earth, and make the Plants reign dominant. He wanted to reign at the top, almost as if he's a king, a tyrant. He was letting all that power get to his head.
I would always clench my fists when I saw him.
That's how much I had hated him from the beginning.
But eventually, I finally saw the truth. All he wanted…was the best for me, and everyone living in the Plants. But even so, he died. He died before we could make up.
I hated it all.
I even made a vow not to ever join the war ever again.
But I did. Unfortunately.
Junius Seven collapsed. I had to stop it. I couldn't let it destroy Earth after all.
Earth was important to me too, not just for Kira, Lacus, or Cagalli.
I even met up with Arisa again.
After that last war. She had disappeared, disappeared without a trace.
Disappeared without even saying a word to neither one of us.
We all suspected that she even died.
Her mobile suit laid there, still in space, fragments floating from side to side peacefully. The after moments of war. That's what it all was. Her mobile suit had been destroyed completely. It could no longer be usable.
But when we tried searching for her, we couldn't find her at all.
Nothing was left. Not a piece of her clothing. Not even a strand of her hair.
Only thing that she left behind, was the pet I had made for her.
Foxy.
That fox had ended up staying with Kira and Lacus. They had promised to keep it safe till the next time they saw Arisa. We all had missed her, and that was the one thing we all regretted.
We had broken our promise to her.
Every time I thought about her, I would always end up remembering that day, that day she joined ZAFT.
She suddenly appeared there, in front of us all at the academy, just months before we all graduated. She had smiled childishly, toddling after me. When I asked her what she was doing here, she gave me no reply. A smile and a giggle. Before running off to bother someone else.
But there, she had made new comrades, and new friends.
She said she never regretted joining the war. She even admitted that she had looked forward for it.
At first I was angry too. She refused to tell me nothing. She wouldn't tell me anything about why she had left Kira. She wouldn't tell me why she joined the war.
Although she always smiled, when no one was looking, her eyes would hang low, a sad expression on her face. She even shed a tear a few times.
That's why I had always been so curious as to why she was so silent.
Although, there were times when she was kinda annoying me. From how she would never say a word, to all those times she pestered me to copy my homework, to help her on a test, and to help her out with anything else that troubled her.
Well, I couldn't really do anything about it.
It was true that she had a lot to catch up on.
She never even piloted a mobile suit before.
But when she did, it was so amazing.
She piloted that thing like a professional, almost as if she had been using it all her life. Imagine our surprise when she said it was her first time! She never even touched one of those things before. It was her first time even learning about that sort of thing. She had become better than us in a second.
She never even expected to lay a finger on one of those things as a child.
I remember sitting on a couch with Kira and Arisa, being all amazed when the TV were showing the new designs of the new mobile suits. We were all so amazed. Kira and I had studied up on those things.
Arisa said she never wanted to fight. She was afraid of fighting.
What if she died?
That was her biggest worry.
But that soon became my biggest worry also.
But she stood there then, her head up high. She had tried her best to hide all her hidden tears. Her face looked so strong, and so powerful, standing in front of all those ZAFT military officers, teachers, and as well, us.
A new Arisa that no one had seen before.
Especially for me.
After I had left them as a kid, I had never conversed with any of them ever again. It was as if we had completely forgot about each other.
Imagine my surprise when I saw Arisa again.
As an idol especially.
The first time when I saw her again, was on a screen downtown. She was singing.
My eyes had widened drastically, watching her every move, every expression, and every lyrics that she sang.
I wake in the morning, tired of sleeping
Get in the shower, and make my bed alone
I put on my makeup, talk into the mirror
Ready for a new day, without you
And I walk steady on my feet
I talk, my voice obeys me
I go out at night, sleep without the lights
And I do all of the things I have to
Keepin' you off my mind
But when I think I'll be alright
I am always wrong, cause
My hands don't wanna start again
My hands, no they don't wanna understand
My hands, they just shake and try to break whatever peace I may find
My hands, they only agree to hold your hands
And they don't wanna be without your hands
And they will not let me go
No they will not let me go
I talk about you now
And do it without crying
I go out with my friends now
I stay home all alone
And I don't see you everywhere
And I can say your name easily
I laugh abit louder, without you
And I see different shades now
I'm almost -never- afraid now
But when I think I'll be okay
I am always wrong, cause...
My hands don't wanna start again
My hands, no they don't wanna understand
My hands, they just shake and try to break whatever peace I may find
My hands, they only agree to hold your hands
No they don't wanna be without your hands
And they will not let me go
No they will not let me go
Sometimes I'll wake
I see them reaching out for you
Quietly break whatever shields I spent so long building up
I cannot fake, 'cause when they cry I'm unspoken
They miss holding my baby...
My hands (my hands)
No they don't wanna understand
They just shake and try to break whatever peace I may find
My hands, your hands, they don't wanna be without your hands
No they will not let me go
No they will not let me go
My hands, don't wanna start again
My hands, no they don't wanna understand
My hands, they just shake and try to break whatever peace I may find
My hands, they only agree to hold your hands
No they don't be without your hands
And they will not let me go
No they will not let me go
No, no, no they will not let me go
Mmm...
That song led me to go find her again.
Of course I had found her, but that was after so much difficulty. Arisa and I had hugged a few times, and exchanged few words. She was too busy to see me, and we met up so few times. Only times I remembered was when she had a day off, which was so few. Even if we did hang out, nothing was ever the same as before.
We had drifted farther apart because of that.
But her joining the military again, brought everything back together. It was a happy moment for the two of us. We were friends again. Although it wasn't anything like before, but still, it was an improvement of some sort.
We were best friends again, although once more, she refused to say the truth about why she had left Kira there. The only thing that I could remember, is her crying.
She had also cried that one day. When Arisa's foster family had died.
Lacus and I were there, holding onto her hands tightly, while the tears kept rolling off her cheek. That's why ever since then, I had become more sensitive to her tears. She became all of our lives, her life at the center.
We wanted to help make up for everything that we had missed out. On all those moments where she would cry alone.
That's also why I hated Kira when I met him again in Heliopolis.
I couldn't forgive him for leaving Arisa.
Even though in truth, it was the other way around.
…Though it wasn't her fault at all.
She had been left alone when her real family disappeared, or rather, died, and she was torn from her brother. That was all she could remember. That was all she wanted to keep. No more painful memories than the ones she already had.
The parting and the sorrow.
Which in why we swore to protect her from that day on.
To finally make sure no more tears would be shed.
That was our promise to her.
But that promise had been broken so many times. Each time became worse and worse.
Her tears would always fall no matter what happened. Even though we tried our best to stop those tears from flowing. We couldn't stop it.
Nothing we did could make her heart stop hurting so much.
Nothing.
We all hated ourselves for that. Because we made her cry again, and again. She was important to all of us, so why couldn't we stop the tears? Isn't the more people the better?
Not in cases like this.
She had too many things to cry about, so she couldn't help but not cry.
We understood, even though we did try so hard to make sure she stopped crying.
Everything we did just didn't seem right.
Nothing seemed to work out.
Nothing.
That's also why I've even gotten into fights with Kira, and Lacus. We've fought over Arisa, always trying to make her happy. Like back on the Archangel.
When we heard her soft crying right before that final battle, we had disputed over that. We were angry at first. Because we didn't who to blame, we blamed each other, even though we didn't even know why she was crying.
Her crying was the last thing we wanted to hear.
Then, almost like a miracle, Arisa stopped crying. She came out of her room right before entering the battlefield…with a bright smile.
A smile so bright, it was almost as if she never cried.
That was what she was capable to do.
To stop crying in an instant.
It was one thing that I could never do.
That's also why we all developed a sense of protection towards her.
Because we wouldn't know what to do if she cried for real.
She was our best friend
A best friends who was irreplacable.
And that concludes this chappy :D
And now....YAYYYYY!~ WE CAN GO BACK TO TEH MAIN STOREHLINE :DDDDDDDDDDDDDD
Did you know that this will all be over in about 5~8 weeks? .___.
Aran
Yeahh~ I'm a huge KH fan. It's like....so epically epic :D
I'm dying here for Birth by Sleep, it just looks so....awesome!
I love "A thousand Words" too~ It's such a nice song. Although I don't really like both the english and japanese singing voice though....they both...bother me o-o. I love the part "And hold you forever" the most. It sounds so pruddyy :3
I want a Lightning cosplay costume...or a Lacus...or a or something of that sort xDDDDDD
I like Riku too~ She actually looks really pretty in X-2... :DDDDD.
And about that crossdressing.....
Shinn: WHATTT! ....Crossdress...as a girl...?...Arisa?
Arisa: I think dressing up as Shinn would be fun :]
Misha: That's cause all you have to wear is pants and a baggy T-shirt...oh! And a jacket...
Arisa: Yeah...but...
Misha: Psh!~ It's easy for you. Girls wear guy clothes all the time... ehehe...Shinn :D
Shinn: But...I'm a guy. I don't wear...dresses, skirts, really short shorts, and heels....
Arisa: o-o? I think it would be cutee~
Misha: I THINK IT WOULD BE HILARIOUS! XDDDDDDD
Shinn: ....Hell no.
Misha: DO IT! I DARE YOU!
Shinn: HELL NO.
Misha: DO IT OR ELSE I'LL GO KILL EVERYONE IN THE NEXT CHAPTER....
Shinn:...I hate you
Misha: LUB YOU TOO :D
3 minutes later.
Shinn: What the hell! HOW THE HELL DO YOU PUT THIS THING ON?
Misha: *snicker and goes off and pulls the curtain down*
Now I'll leave your imagination here :D You are free to imagine him however you want...even...naked? o-o
Arisa: ....O_______O;;
Misha: ROFLICOPTER! *Laughs so hard I fall down onto the floor*
Arisa: I'm gonna...leave
Misha: And yeah :D
TalesOfLegendia Fan
Yush! I love Roxas too! He's so kyuute!~ :3
R&R everyone :D
Cuz it makes Arisa happeh :D