[A:N] Thanks for the words of encouragement to everyone who have offered them. We are getting close to the end here. These later chapters have been tough, but with the right music, have been coming together. If anyone is interested in knowing what I am listing too when writing and reading this, feel free to message me. I hope those who have enjoyed things so far like these next chapters, and as I have said before, good, bad, or otherwise, I appreciate all reviews.
"Williams … Ash is that you?" He asked even though he knew the answer to his question, her manner of speech identifying her easily.
"Yeah Skipper, it's me." She said; a subtle strain present on her voice that Shepard assumed was from the gravity of the information she had for him.
Leaving her location at the damaged door, Ashley Williams proceeded over to where the rest of the team had gathered. Forcefully moving in-between Garrus and Jacob, she proceeded to type on the deceased Executor's terminal as Miranda stood aside. Turning her attention to Shepard, Ashley stared at him intently as she finished her entry and the screen changed. Sighing deeply as she stood up straight, she motioned for him to come and see before joining Miranda.
Apprehensively, Shepard proceeded towards the terminal when he was suddenly intercepted by a concerned turian, his movement impeded. Placing his hands on shoulders, the turian stared directly into his eyes as he spoke in a calm manner.
"Listen John, this is going to be very difficult for you to take in, let alone accept. We'll be outside if you need us."
Turning his head to face the three former crew members, Garrus gestured for them to leave as he made his way to the door. Turning briefly to look at his friend again, he followed the rest of the party out of the door.
Alone, Shepard uneasily stared at the terminal as his mind raced with doubt and uncertainty.
'After all that has fucking happened, what could be so bad that they felt I needed to be alone?'
Nervously he proceeded towards the unimposing terminal as it flickered periodically, taunting him. Taking a deep breath, he sat down and looked at the screen. Motioning with his hands, he brought up the transmission log that had been located mostly likely by Miranda based on how it was displayed. Briefly he reviewed the entries searching for what he needed, answers.
'Nothing out of the ordinary, at least, I think … Wait a minute …'
Scrolling, he began to piece together what Miranda had noticed during her search. A pattern began to form that looked eerily familiar to him. Suddenly he felt his heartbeat begin to pick up velocity as the implications of what he was seeing were starting to become clear. Rapidly he transitioned to another data window as he reviewed more of the log entries till he finally came to a partial transmission. With a tell-tale title which most likely Miranda had found before Ashley accessed it, he paused.
His hands shaking as a bead of sweat ran down his forehead onto his right cheek, he executed the command for it to play. Sitting in silence, he watched the screen as a familiar image came before him. Its very existence destroyed what little self-control he had left as the partially garbled audio played.
Restraining himself with all his might, he fought his inner demons that cried out for immediate satisfaction that only an outburst of wrath could provide. His control failing, he felt the surge of biotic energy enhanced by the reaper technology in him build. His mind finally being overwhelmed, he exploded with rage.
"Why! WHY!" Shepard yelled over and over as he flipped over the desk, destroying the terminal.
Bursts of biotic energy began flow from him around the room, destroying anything in their path as he continued to scream.
Hearing the anguish Shepard was in, Miranda and Jacob activated their barriers and attempted to return to the Executors office before being stopped by Garrus, a somber look drawn over his face as he softly spoke.
"Wait …"
"But the Commander needs …" Miranda and Jacob both started to say before being cut off.
"Wait …" Garrus replied as he hung his head low, the pain he felt for his brother-in-arms almost too much for him to bear as Ashley stood silently away from the group; her right hand rubbing her forehead as the other rested on her hip.
The cup of his rage going unfilled, he reached out to the broken body of Executor Pallin. Grasping him with his biotically reinforced hands, he screamed at him the only words that he could formulate.
"WHY! WHY!" Repeated he yelled with a raspy voice as his grip and pull tightened.
Yanking with all the might he could muster, he tore the lifeless form limb from limb; the blood flowed freely as it showered Shepard in turian gore. His rage climaxing as he held the head of the Executor, he firmly grasped his mandibles and pulled, awkwardly splitting his skull before setting his gruesome remains on fire through bursts of uncontrolled biotic energy.
Drained of all fury driven strength, Shepard collapsed to his knees as he struggled to breathe. Suddenly a set of 3 fingers gripped his shoulder in an effort to comfort him as a set of familiar piercing eyes looked back at him.
"Just breath John … Just breathe …"
Spent, he collapsed head-first into his friend, unconscious.
"Miranda …" Was all Garrus could say as what he desired from her went unspoken.
Kneeling down by Shepard, Miranda scanned him as the rest of the group made their way into the room. After a brief period, she stopped her scans and stood up. Looking at Garrus, she spoke.
"He's asleep, thoroughly drained of energy from the biotics he used. Without the reaper-based implants in him and the increased regenerative capabilities he is experiencing, he probably would be dead right now."
"I wonder if that wouldn't have been a better fate for him ..." Garrus lamented quietly.
"Garrus …" Jacob said as he moved towards him.
"No, I'm alright. It's Shepard we need to worry about." He said as he looked down at him.
"He will be out for awhile, we can't stay here. This place will be crawling with C-Sec soon." Miranda said as she walked over to join the rest of the crew.
"We shouldn't have to worry about them for awhile." Williams interjected; her words causing Miranda to raise an eyebrow.
"But we do need to get out of here. I have a place not too far from here. We can go there now." Williams said as she made her way through the door, her hands rubbing her forehead incessantly.
"Am I the only one or is she acting odd? I thought I had heard at one time she actually had a thing for Shepard and now she's more of an ice queen than you Miri." Jacob said, trying to lighten the mood at Miranda's expense.
"We can discuss it later Jacob. Let's focus on getting the Commander out of here for now." Miranda said in a commanding tone; her tone conveying that there was more than just Williams' behavior that needed to be discussed.
Reaching down for Shepard, Jacob was stopped.
"I got him." Garrus said firmly, his words betraying his need to be the one carrying Shepard.
"We'll head outside and get the transport ready." Jacob said as he motioned for Miranda to follow.
Leaving rapidly, Garrus was alone with Shepard, the strain on his face that he saw earlier replaced with an uneasy sleep.
Lifting Shepard upon his shoulders in what Shepard had once referred to as a fireman's carry, Garrus made his way to the door. Pausing, he turned to look around at the destruction that had taken place. Blood and partially charred body parts strewn all over the walls and the floor, it was quite the grisly sight, even if deserved.
Looking at Shepard, Garrus shook his head.
"Dammit." He said before heading out to join the others.
Kasumi had put up enough resistance that quite a few members of the team assigned to Cain were not present for the roll-call before they were scheduled to depart. This mattered little to Cain as he was sure it mattered little to his retainer, but the rest of the crew were highly agitated that she was still alive after inflicting such heavy losses. Seeing that this could become a potential issue, he contemplated what crew members would be best for the job of guarding her.
"Keep her sedated for now. The boss has plans for her." Cutter ordered.
Walking over to Cain as the guards walked past him into the transport, he nodded slightly at him before taking a spot at his side. Motioning to the rest of the ground team, they proceeded to follow Cain's instructions and entered the transport until only Cain and Cutter remained.
"So, you ready to get paid?" Cain said as he lit a cigarette.
"You know it! Not much longer and I can kiss all this shit and you goodbye." Cutter happily exclaimed.
"Keep in mind, part of the terms of your payment are that she makes it to our destination, alive." His words drawing an uneasy nod from Cutter as a silent agreement was met on who would be in charge or guarding her.
Taking a drag on his cigarette until only half it remained, Cain slowly exhaled the smoke slowly from his lungs; small rings forming as he slowly staggered his breath.
"So I take it you still think all this will end once you get paid?" He said drawing a confused look from his turian companion.
"What do you mean Cain? I did my part, and I expect to be done with this business." Cutter said, his voice rising in volume as he thought he may get stiffed on his payment.
Taking a moment to assess the situation as well as finish his smoke, Cain rapidly turned towards Cutter causing him to slightly jump. Smiling, Cain tranquilly spoke as he looked Cutter in his shifty eyes.
"Expecting to be done … Let me tell you something Cutter … Once an evil dead has been done, it never ends … It lives, forever."
Flicking his spent butt onto the ground as the embers danced wildly till extinguishing, Cain turned and walked into the transport. Staring at the ground, Cutter momentarily contemplated the words that Cain spoke before shaking his head clear.
'Fucking fool.'
Ignoring the knowledge that Cain had imparted to him, Cutter made his ways into the transport towards where Kasumi was most likely being detained. Hoping this would be the last leg of his journey, he contemplated what he would do with his new found wealth.
Piled into the Spectre's vehicle, Shepard laid propped up against Miranda and Jacob as Garrus stared out into traffic. The transport was unusual in design in that the driver section was separated by a field from the rest of the vehicle. Seeing Ashley grasping her head again in obvious pain, Garrus gestured for Miranda and Jacob to view what was transpiring up front with the former crewmate.
"Everything okay up there Ash?" Garrus said with a level of genuine concern combined with an air of carefully guarded suspicion.
"What? Yes, everything is fine. Just got a small headache that's all." She responded as her vision never wavered.
With his C-Sec detective hat figuratively on, Garrus continued to probe Ashley with questions as Miranda continued her review of Shepard's vital signs.
"That was a real break you got in finding us. How did you say that happened again?"
Annoyed by his line of questioning, Ashley retorted as she moved her free hand towards the console, adjusting the temperature in the transport.
"You guys made enough of a scene on your way to Pallin's office that it caught my attention. Skipper always knew how to make an entrance."
Nodding in agreement, Jacob commented on her response.
"Yeah, Shepard drove like a man possessed to get to Pallin's office, but it looks like someone beat us to it."
"You should have seen how he drove the Mako Jacob back on the first Normandy. Skipper was always a rough driver when it came to vehicles. If any of us were in danger, you better hold onto to your seat." Ashley responded, her vision transitioning between piloting the transport and her passengers.
Eying Ashley inquisitively, Garrus decided to lay down the bait as he found himself feeling more relaxed.
"Yeah, I remember those days. Some of the tight spots we got out of were next to impossible. I had always been meaning to ask you Ash … How did you know what had happened to Tali that night? I mean, Shepard and her were completely off the grid and as far as I know, only Kasumi and I really knew anything about their location." He said as he studied her reaction to his line of questioning before he continued, his hand slowly moving out of sight .
Silence filled the cabin of the transport as no answer was forth coming from pilot.
"And luckily for me, you show up to get rid of the Executor at the crime scene. Probably were monitoring his communications like all you Spectres do right?"
Seeing that his line of questioning was causing a bead of strained sweat to form on Williams forehead, Garrus continued as he stealthily moved his hand to his pistol even as a stronger feeling of relaxation was filling him.
"And luckily for us again, you show up right when we need you at Palin's office. Too bad we couldn't have had that luck earlier." He said, setting the trap that Williams fell into as she grasped her forehead intensely from pain.
"If I could have been there at the bar Garrus, I would have. I 'm sorry I couldn't have helped you guys out when all that went down."
His eyes growing wide as he realized the implications of what she had just said, Garrus reached for his weapon and drew it. Aiming directly at Williams, Garrus received puzzled looks from a slightly groggy Miranda and Jacob as Shepard bobbed back and forth in-between them.
"Officer Vakarian, what the hell are you doing?" Miranda asked as Jacob joined her questioning of Garrus with a lazy stare.
"What I should have done a long time ago … I never mentioned anything about the shootout at the bar." He said as he briefly looked at Miranda before training his vision back on Williams.
Seizing the moment, Ashley activated what appeared as temperature controls causing the rear passenger cabin to fill rapidly with a gaseous substance.
"What the fuck!" Garrus yelled as he opened fire, his round impacting the field protecting the pilot.
Reaching for their weapons, Miranda and Jacob soon succumbed to the fumes that were permeating the cabin, their weapons dropping to the floor. In a futile attempt to escape, Garrus pounded on the doors as he fought to stay conscious.
"I'm gonna kill you …" He said as he coughed in between his words as he subconsciously resigned himself to his fate.
Feeling that he was about the slip into unconsciousness, he uttered what were his last words before slumping over into Jacob and Shepard, a slight chuckle escaping his lips.
"… Shepard's gonna kill you …"
Seeing that her passengers were now asleep, Williams operated her omni-tool and began to speak.
"I got them all … alive … yes I will dock with the ship and have them disarmed … Shepard, Shepard's …" She stopped as the strain she was under intensified.
"He is unconscious as well … spent himself destroying Pallin's office … make sure we have more than adequate number of guards to meet me at the docking bay."
Ending her transmission, she looked one last time at the slumbering former friends before continuing on to her true destination. Overcome with emotion that she strained against, tears began to roll down her cheeks to the silent hum of the transport.
"When you touch a flower or smell its fragrance, you are doing something I can never do."
Her words had struck deeply at him ever since they were first uttered. Memories of that moment always filled him with a sense of respect at the strength it took to live in skin tight prison. What he had seen past as his feelings grew for her was a constant penitentiary that she was trapped forever inside. Simple pleasures that he took for granted, their trivial nature as he perceived them were things she could easily die from attempting to enjoy.
"Mordin, is there any hope to get the quarians … Tali out of her prison?" He inquired to faceless figure in the distance, drawing no response as a light swayed back and forth over their head.
"Mordin?" He asked again as he walked towards him; his shadow his only company.
As the face of the scientist he had grown to respect came into view, a persistent shadow blocked his head from the neck up. The light that slowly swayed above him adjusting the shadow as it went back and forth.
"Cure for quarians? Poor immune systems … so sad. Yes, YES! Cure for quarians is here. Come, let me show you." Mordin said as he gestured to Shepard to come closer.
As he proceeded, Shepard noticed that the light had stopped swinging. Confused, Shepard paused. Suddenly Mordin stepped forward as the ever-present shadow left his face. To Shepard's horror the scientist was a visage of a reaper infused husk.
"Yes. This is the cure you seek." Mordin said as he lunged at Shepard.
Struggling with the indoctrinated scientist, Shepard looked to his left as a light illuminated a shotgun on the ground. Grasping it quickly as he forced the scientists head upward, he jammed the barrel into the possessed salarian's mouth before pulling the trigger. The blast showered Shepard with bits of flesh as the husk slumped forward onto him.
Spent, he pushed the lifeless form off of him before standing up. As he turned to look around the light was extinguished, leaving only darkness behind to fill the void that surrounded him. Spinning violently as the nothingness appeared never-ending, he screamed out in rage.
His yells growing in fury as he spun more rapidly, he stumbled over the husk at his feet, falling to the ground on his stomach, briefly knocking the wind out of him. Looking around, the scenery surrounding him had changed.
Shepard now found himself in the collector base as a platform was collapsing. Confused, he stood up and looked around in a daze, his hand still gripping the shotgun he had used on Mordin. Suddenly he heard a scream as he saw a lone quarian figure sliding down a platform that was toppling over.
Rushing with all his might, he leapt to the platform, reaching out as fast as he could as he grasped for the quarian. Gripping her hand, he held on with all his might as he attempted to pull her up.
"Please! Don't let go! Please!" She pleaded with him.
"I won't! Just hang on!" He yelled back as he strained with all his might to keep his vow.
Abruptly the hand gripping the quarian's began to slowly crumble to the horror of both. First flesh, then sinew began to disintegrate as the pain Shepard felt intensified from its decay.
"Please John! Don't let me go!" She yelled at him as his grip on her began to falter.
Suddenly, his hold on her failed as his bones snapped causing her to falll into the nothingness below with a blood curdling scream.
"John!"
"Tali! No!" Shepard yelled as he grasped at her with what remained of his appendage in futility.
The platform crumbling further, he stood up and stared down into the pit below, un-phased by the approaching column aimed directly at him. Looking up as it was mere feet from impacting him, he closed his eyes awaiting the impending doom he felt was deserved.
"John? What are you doing now? You know we are going to be late and you are off just … meditating?" Tali said as she rushed to get suit in order.
"What? Where am I?" He asked as he looked around in confusion at the surroundings.
"What do you mean where am I? You better not be faking an illness as you know how important this meeting is to me." She said playfully as he stared on in confusion.
Looking intently at her, he studied the figure before him in disbelief that she was really there. Concerned, Tali walked up to him and lightly grasped his arm.
"Are you okay? Maybe we should do this another time …" She attempted to say before being cut off by a strong hug placed around her.
"Umm … John? Is everything okay?" She said, followed by a comfortable silence as he held her tightly.
"Sssh … Just let me stay like this, even for only a little while."
Everything he had desired was in his arms at last, and he refused to let her go. After what seemed like forever, he relaxed his grip on her. Looking at her intently, he released the seals on her visor as he desired to see his lover's face.
To his horror, he was greeted with the vision of skeletal quarian remains. The weight of his lover leaving his hands, he found himself standing over a grave holding a quarian suit with a skeleton inside as the surrounds had changed again to a familiar field.
"Tali!" He yelled at the suit, half expecting a response.
Grasping the remains tightly in an embrace, he slowly fell to his knees. With great care, he slowly placed the remains onto the ground as his eyes studied the marker; his inner dialog bouncing from word to word as he read.
'… Hero … Loving wife …'
Spent of all energy and emotion, Shepard gripped the dirt that laid over the grave before him. Grinding his fingers into the soft soil, he looked towards the sky as he screamed with the all the pent up agony and pain that had been building inside of him before being interrupted.
"She's dead John … We're dead John … You have to accept it." A familiar voice spoke from behind the marker.
"Kaidan?" He spoke as he looked at the long dead hero before him.
"Yes Commander, it's me. I wish I could have been with you to the very end, maybe this wouldn't have happened …" Kaidan said, the volume of his voice drifting off.
"I don't understand Kaidan?"
"I'm sorry Commander, I really am." He said as he slowly began to disappear.
"Kaidan wait! I need your help! I'm sorry for what …" Shepard shouted.
"As am I Commander, as am I …" He responded before disappearing completely.
As a light misting of rain began to fall, he fell forward into the earth before him. Grasping full handfuls of the mud mixture, he pulled it slowly towards him as if to join the deceased below. His task was interrupted as he felt several powerful fingers run through his hair. Gently they caressed his head in a manner that was familiar to him. A second hand reached under his chin and softly lifted it upwards, drawing his vision to the form before him.
"I love you John Shepard." The quarian phantom spoke in a calming manner, this visage of pure beauty unencumbered by a visor.
"Tali …" He said through mud stained lips.
"I'll always love you John …" The spirit said one final time before vanishing as he reached out for her unsuccessfully.
His target missed, he pounded his fist repeated into the ground as mud splattered over him and the quarian suit to his side.
"Sucks to be you, doesn't it Shepard." A familiar cruel voice spoke from behind, building the rage inside him.
Seeing a knife attached to the boot of the remains before him, he quickly grasped the knife before turning to face the voice's owner. The image clouded by the amount of rain now falling, he ran forward with the knife drawn as he yelled in primal fury. Closing the distance, he shut his eyes at the moment of impact as he pictured Saren at the end of Tali's weapon; the blade penetrating flesh to the hilt as it gave off a loud thud.
"John …" Softly the figure spoke as it collapsed into him, the tell tale blood pouring onto the ground as the rain washed it away.
"I Love you John … I've always loved you …" She said softly.
Overcome with emotion and guilt for feelings long dormant mixed with hatred, he spoke.
"Liara?"
"Yes Shepard, she's been expecting you." Cain spoke as he held up Shepard's head before letting it limply slump down.
Pinned against a wall with his arms and legs immobilized, Cain released Shepard's head before proceeding towards the room exit. Pausing at the entrance with a cruel smile, he turned his head and spoke.
"I am sure you two have a lot to talk about."