Chapter 14: Anger

Hermione felt another spell fling her into a heap of hurt. She lay with blood rushing from her nose but she kept alert. The young witch may have been a bit disabled in her constant spot, but she could still hold off the Death eater's attempt at murder. She took him down with a bruising spell that would have him in pain for quite a bit.

As it was habit, she turned to check on where Sirius might have strayed to and her breath caught as she saw him slumped unconscious on the ground. Lucky a man fighting for the Good Side had begun to duel the bastard that obviously put him there.

Hermione flung herself upright and made her way to his side. Once she got there she grasped his hand and off they cracked into another one of their hide-outs.

She had to carry his dead-weighted body into the house as it was never safe out in the open. Once she got there she immediately checked his pulse and she found it.

He was alive.

Hermione let the tears that blurred her vision fall and the breath she held to rush out. Once the young girl had her breath under control, she started to heal him. With nothing extremely major, a crack to the skull, bruises along the right side of his torso and a broken foot. The young girl was so grateful that this was all it was.

He was then stabilized. Hermione lay him down in their bed and kissed his forehead. She couldn't say how thankful she was that he was still alive.

Once she had strengthened the wards around their hide-out she returned to the fight that was taking place outside Tonks' house. It was taken over a few months ago as a Death Eater station now. Hermione arrived and immediately started fighting a Death Eater. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see that Kingsley Shacklebolt was fighting with her too. She could also see Emmeline Vance around the back of the house fighting off two death eaters.

The young witch tried to get closer to Kingsley and when she did she asked "Any news?"

"Bill and Fleur are missing" he said still shooting spells out still concentrated on his opponent. Hermione felt something else in her stomach drop at the news.

"Any sight of them?" she asked. Hermione wasn't talking about the young couple. Kingsley looked over to her and caught her meaning. She was talking about Harry and Ron.

"None" he said.

They continued to fight until Hermione had taken down four Death Eaters and had sustained enough injuries to crave an out. A constant stream of hexes, spells and even some curses left her mouth. Hermione didn't even register most of them as they came out. Exhaustion was almost blinding her by the time dawn rose. She had spent the entire night there and she was tired. The young Gryffindor trained her eyes open even though they longed for the few sleeping spells that shot out of her wand. The Death Eaters had increased in number and Hermione had been pulled aside by Kingsley.

"Hermione, it's no use. We need to retreat" he said hopelessly. "Come with me"

He was pulling at her arms .

"NO!" she said grabbing it back "I have to go get Sirius" Hermione apparated to get out of range of a horribly-timed a curse. The brunette realised that she had apparated to their hide-out and that once again, they were cut off contact from any one else. She sighed at the loss once again before checking the landscape to see that no Death Eater followed her here. Hermione felt satisfied at the empty street before her.

As she walked into the door she got attacked by a body. She could feel herself whole now. His long, toned and hardened body could be distinguished from others in a heart-beat. Sirius was here and she thanked Merlin he was fully healed. Hermione placed a sleeping spell that wore off after all his injuries were fully healed.

The young witch was then grabbed by the shoulders and pushed at a distance "What the FUCK did you think you were doing going back?"

She wasn't shocked by this behaviour, she pushed past him to lay on their bed. Only about 3 curses made their way past her defences and she was lucky that they were fairly harmless.

"Sirius, can we not do this now?" she was feeling so tired. She was fighting a massive headache and ready to sleep. A fight was to ensue, she just knew it.

"We will do this now" he almost shouted. He felt his voice was going to waver but he kept it steady.

"Sirius, I am buggered" she said clicking her neck as she rolled it. At least some of the pressure had been elevated.

"Do you take my concern as some sort of joke?" he asked, anger brewing there.

Hermione could feel his anger and some of hers arose to meet it. "I'm alive and fine, Sirius. Just let it go"

"Just let it go?" his voice rising in volume. "You could have died and I'd have no idea how to get to you or how to-"

"Save me?" she asked feeling irritated that this was the thousandth time they had gone over it and he still didn't get it. She was a witch, a powerful witch who could stand her own. She didn't need a man to save her like some damsel in distress, she could handle her own.

"Yes" he said without awareness of her state of irritation "I didn't have a bloody wand" . Hermione looked into her robes and pulled out a spare wand she had nicked from the ground. "There you go" she said as she tossed it onto the night stand.

She shook off her robes and set to getting into bed. If she turned back to him they would start a mean fight and she didn't have the energy. Hermione slipped in and without any other word said he got in too. His arms wound around her and she felt right at home even though she was mad at said home. She was then slowly slipping into the thing she craved the most right now until his voice broke her out of it.

"You have no idea how I felt when I woke up without you" he said at her softly. Hermione turned in his arms to stare up at his broken-hearted face.

"I- I couldn't do it without you" he said staring deeply without conscience into her eyes. Tears had fallen even more profusely from his brilliant grey eyes. Hermione's heart broke as the man before her cried."You can't leave me alone"

"I want you to never do that EVER again" he said after a few moments of silence.

"I won't do it again" Hermione breathed against his lips. She kissed him to put everything she felt into it.

"I want you to promise me that" he said. The young girl could see that her kisses couldn't placate him. He was a man that knew the troubles of the world and was troubled by it. Hermione would do anything to soothe him like his touch did her.

Hermione looked into his eyes and felt the concern haunt his very being. "I promise I won't leave you alone"

He kissed her this time with a renewed fever and that night they slept peacefully content that the other was there. Just being there would ease the war that raged in their hearts.

Hermione awoke to the powerful sense of loss that had taken her in the dawn. She was a moment ago in the arms of the man she loved. Now she was alone and cold. The sobs that threatened her overtook her body again. She rolled out of bed and hit the floor with absolutely no grace. Hermione knew she was no pageant queen as she made to stand shakily. For the past week she had been trying to sit up correctly and she had successfully done it yesterday. It still felt painful, but she no longer had to ask for help to sit up and for that she'd go through hell for.

She caught herself as she braced herself against the wall still with the powerful sobs escaping her chest. Hermione needed fresh air now. The young brunette flung herself out of the room she had been exiled to for the past week and made her way down the stairs. Inside the house felt stuffy and just too constricting at the moment for her violent chest. She saw the front door and launched herself at it. Not being able to stand didn't make a difference as she flung her body in intervals at different objects to help her as she reached the door.

Once it was flung open, the sight of January snow and the crisp air that hit her had her furious breathing/sobbing under control. Hermione finally felt the strength in her legs kick in as she touched her bare feet against the ice cold snow. She got her legs to stand up straight but she still sobbed for the loss of her husband.

After awhile when her sobs got under control did she feel the anger she had in her chest arise. How dare he make her promise to never leave her? How dare he not return such a promise? Hermione knew she was an idiot for not making him promise the same thing. He was a right bastard for not promising that right back.

He was a right fucking bastard for leaving her alone. Then he went and made her immortal with his fucking stupid sacrificed love. When she saw him again after she figured how she was going to die, she was going to throttle him.

Then make love to him a voice perked up

Oh, fuck up. I'll cut his dick off and make him eat it before anything like that happens Hermione told herself. There was still that part of her that loved him endlessly, she had to squash that part of herself away. It wasn't going to help her with anything. Especially with the Sirius of this time.

Such violent words her mind chastised her.

Hermione felt anger course through her as her mind tried to shame her from her confession. She wanted to scream, she was going crazy. The young girl was tired of yearning for him, when he so violently ripped himself away from her and stopped any chance of them reuniting, even in death. She cradled her head in her hands as she hated the feeling of loss that filled her. She much preferred the anger that filled her gut.

Suddenly her breathing was overcome with more sobs as they escaped her throat. They couldn't come out as anything but strangled cries. Suddenly a hand yanked her by the arm to spin her and she came face to face with the face she wanted to smash so violently right now.

"Hermione, what are you doing?" he started with obvious concern in his face "You'll catch your dea-"

Suddenly her fist came swinging to hit his jaw. She heard the satisfying crack of his jaw. The part screaming at her inside to stop was ignored as she saw nothing but his blood. Hermione was tired of feeling sad, tired of feeling alone. Sirius flew back surprised that she had just sucker punched him.

He was filled with shock but did nothing to stop her as another blow landed him on the ground. His shirt was pulled until he stood and her fist collided with his eye making him see stars for a good few seconds.

"I fucking hate you" she said as she shoved him again to the ground. Sirius didn't protest as she swung her foot forward swiftly to injure his ribs. She kicked and kicked at him until she lost her footing and was sprawled on the ground beside him. This stopped her for a good minute as she caught her breath.

Sirius felt the shock in his system but it did nothing to wake him out of this stupor. She needed to hit him, he was an idiot. It might have hurt him emotionally more that those words had left her lips than the breaking of his jaw, but he needed her to let it out.

Once she had regained some of the energy from the anger that filled because he wasn't fighting her back, she straddled him. She looked him in the eye to see resignation to his fate.

She hated him so fucking much right now. She pulled her fist back to throw another blow across his too beautiful face. Hopefully it'll fuck it up enough so that no one would ever go near him again. This selfish bastard was such an arsehole, he only caused people hurt. The blows kept coming. Again and again her fist met his face and he didn't fight a single one of them.

Hermione raised her fist to once again hit his face but it was held by a hand.

"That's quite enough now" Mr Potter's voice said firmly as he held the fragile girl and pulled her off of him. Hermione turned to see that James Potter stood transfixed by the sight before him. He looked on with a defeated expression. He couldn't fight what he knew they both deserved.

"No" Sirius said with blood dribbling down his chin trying to break his hold of Hermione.

"You aren't going to be hurt anymore, Sirius" the older man said looking at Hermione with the instruction clear in his voice. Hermione broke his hold on her as she turned on the spot and apparrated away. She didn't want to deal with Mr Potter's disappointment in her. James' awaiting of his punishment. Sirius' stupid fucking understanding.

Sirius reached out to grab her but missed and she was gone.

"Sirius, are you alright?" Richard said grabbing him as he swayed on the spot.

"No, she's gone" he breathed "It's my fault"

"She'll calm down and return, don't worry about her" he assured him.

"It's my fault" Sirius gritted out so ashamed of himself. James had convinced him it was a blessing that Hermione decided not to inform his parents of the incident but right now he was sinking in guilt. He couldn't keep it a secret.

"I-" he started

"Dad, we were the reason Hermione was attacked" James said coming forward with tears brimming his eyes. He tried to steel them away but it was no use as the emotion Hermione had just shown brought out the guilt and shame they had both been suffering for months.

Mr Potter's eyebrow raised in a stern manner as he voiced "Get inside". His protective demeanour disappeared at the words that his son said.

Richard Potter was not a happy man after that. He led both of his boys into the house and found Mrs Potter walking down the stairs at her usual 6am. She was shocked to see all of the men in her house enter it. The look on her husband's face told her something big had happened. Instead of questioning it, they walked to the living room where the older man stood directing the boys to take a seat.

Mrs Potter took a seat across the boys as she stared worriedly at Richard.

Mr Potter seemed to steel his jaw as the thoughts in his head ran wild. "Tell me what you meant by that" he said quietly through his clenched teeth.

Sirius looked outside to see if she had come back as James looked shamefully at his parents. The dark-haired Black turned back to his adoptive parents as he started to retell the story.

-8-

Hermione apparated to her house. The one place that would hold all the memories of her childhood. It wasn't painted baby blue, but pearl white. It was a very plain looking house. The gardens were kept much better here. It was early morning and the family that resided here may have been still asleep. It was still freezing this side of London but Hermione was beyond feeling the numbness that seeped into her toes. Or the pain that ran from her knuckles.

The young girl ran her fingers over the wooden porch as she sunk down to lean more against it. Her newly-formed muscles protested as did her chest but the wood felt warmer than her body. She wanted so badly for this to feel like home. For it to feel like something that would soothe the break in her heart.

Hermione rose after a full few minutes of nothing felt. All it was, was a memory. A distant memory and nothing more. She apparated again to her mother's childhood house. Something she knew her mother would still be living.

As she made it to her grandparent's house, she felt how close to home it had felt. Walking around to the back where she knew her mother's room would be, she peeked in. Like she had expected, her mother slept peacefully with her luscious dark brown hair against the pillow.

Monica Davies looked absolutely stunning as a young adult and a smile pulled across her face. Suddenly a hand- a male hand- shot out from behind her and a smile crept up on the young girl's face. The man out of Hermione's gaze sat up and to say she was shocked was an understatement.

It wasn't her father.

Hermione turned and fled from the scene. It confused the fuck out of her. In this time, they should've already been together if Hermione's math was correct. She ran toward the nearest park and sat on a freezing bench to get together the confusing emotions in her chest. She finally cast a warming spell on herself as the cold started to get to her.

The feeling that she didn't belong settled in her chest. The young woman didn't belong in this time and she wasn't going to ever if the events before her eyes told her something. She didn't come from anywhere now, she guessed. Would she be forever haunted by the memories of her time in the future? Would she never even exist again as a normal muggle-born witch? Was there absolutely no chance of another girl exactly like her with large teeth and frizzy hair named after a Shakespearean play living a perfectly normal life?

Breathe. Just breathe, Hermione.

-8-

The room had remained silent for the entire morning as the information sunk in for the adults. Mrs Potter had tears streaming down her face as she clutched her chest.

"Why the hell didn't Albus tell us any of this?"Richard Potter bellowed "We deserved to know" he was shaking so violently he thought he might explode soon.

Sirius knew the error of his ways, as did James. Both knew but didn't know how they were going to correct it? The boys remained silent throughout this thorough growling thinking of how they were going to rectify this situation. Mrs Potter had sat ridden with guilt as she had done nothing for the past two weeks but push her and Sirius together unknown to the trouble this young girl faced. For shame she thought to herself. Hermione wasn't avoiding love, she was avoiding pain and ridicule. From these boys she thought she had the privilege to call worthy. Dorothy Potter was so ashamed of them.

She couldn't believe she called them her sons. Dorothy picked herself up and walked out of the room to the shock of the boys who expected a verbal tirade from the older witch.

"What exactly were you thinking?" Mr Potter growled. "Letting a werewolf out of confines is not a prank. What part of suffering a horrible curse is funny?"

The boys refused to meet each other's eyes and their father's as he vented his anger. Richard Potter was not a man to defy when mad. He was literally vibrating with angry magic as he looked at them.

-8-

After the sun had set, Hermione picked herself up off the frozen park bench and made her way to an abandoned street corner where she could apparate to the Potters. She could see the light on downstairs as she knocked on the door.

Opening the door she was embraced once again by Mrs Potter. A warm and comforting hug that Hermione forgot she banned from receiving. When the older witch let her go, she didn't say a word as she wrapped a cloak around the young girl and they stepped out together. Dorothy spelled some shoes on the younger girl before they stepped onto the snow again.

The older witch held out her hand and Hermione took it. She was too numbed by the winter's cold to fight or excuse herself or lie. She apparated them to the entry to Diagon Alley. The Leaky Cauldron.

Getting a room was easy. They travelled up to a room 59 in silence. Inside it Hermione took off the cloak that she was wrapped in and remembered that she was still in her night clothes. The young girl felt that at least was a good thing.

Mrs Potter sat in the nearest seat after pulling off her own cloak and drew five bottles of firewhiskey from her purse. The younger witch looked over and wondered how on earth she didn't think of that brilliant idea. But then she remembered the older woman's stance on teenage drinking. She was thoroughly pissed at James and Sirius when she realised they were drunk the night they found her. All hope of her getting drunk was probably out the window right now. Hermione frowned at the thought.

"You're older in your time, aren't you?" Dorothy asked. "Albus mentioned that"

Hermione then perked up and nodded in the Healer's direction. She then heard a small "Brilliant" as she pulled out two glasses with cobwebs covering every surface of it. With a wave of her wand, it wasn't anymore. She poured Hermione a glass and passed it to her.

Hermione took it in one shot and was happy to see it refill itself.

They sat in silence cradling their glasses of firewhiskey, both with thoughts going round and round in their head. The familiar burn down her throat was at least some comfort to her. Hermione knew this feeling wasn't the haven she craved, but it'd be enough to numb her tonight. She was feeling too much and she needed to feel less. How was she going to be anything other than a sad little widow?

Sirius was gone. She loved him, she hated him, he was hers and she was his. Hermione was determined he be her first and last but she had doubts about whether she was even his first love. The thing that Hermione kept thinking ever since she got to this time was that he didn't love her as much as she loved him. Maybe he killed himself for her as a way to exit their life without anyone looking down on him for wanting to join his friends. He died for love, not to keep his love alive, but to meet those he really did love on the other side. Hermione's heart filled with more anguish.

He might have thought that no one would hate him for going out like a hero but Hermione hated. She hated and hated and she didn't know how to stop hating. If he really loved her, he wouldn't have made her immortal by this 'love'. His love should have killed her with him as the marriage binding had suggested it do. Absolutely no where in the bond did it state that immortality was a side-effect.

That had to tell her that he didn't love her. There was no other explanation.

Hermione chugged down another glass full in one shot. The feeling of numbness spread down to her toes. She liked it there as she wriggled and felt no response.

"Have they even tried to apologise?" Mrs Potter's voice broke her out of the depressing thoughts that filled her.

"Yeah, they all have" Hermione focused then on what filled the older woman's mind. Her problems were tormenting her. This problem with Dorothy's boys was at least something she could fix. Did she even want to fix it? She had done already so much for them that they questioned, could she just let this remain as it was? Let them fix it themselves? Could it build them as the men they were supposed to be? Or would it stint their growth and make them remain as they are?

Problems with fate were honestly the reason she didn't take Divination.

"Well, that just leaves me then" she said looking at Hermione with all the wrinkles apparent on her face. She reached forward to collect Hermione's hand in hers as she tried not to cry.

"I'm sorry I didn't take you back to Hogwarts when you wanted to go" she breathed in and out to steady herself for the next apology so she didn't break down.

"I'm sorry that I tried to force you to want to be with Sirius" her head bowed down as the tears fell one by one

"And I'm sorry for not raising my boys better" she said finally with her voice breaking finally and sobs wracking her body.

The older woman looked to her with such sincerity in her eyes Hermione felt the tingling of more comfort. Whether it came out from her apology or the fire whiskey, Hermione couldn't tell the difference. The younger girl sighed.

"You're forgiven" Hermione said feeling that this woman was paying for the sins of her sons, she didn't want that. "As long as you keep the fire whiskey coming, that is"

Mrs Potter had a smile that pulled across her face as she sobbed.

-8-

It was a quarter to 11 on Sunday and the boys were at Platform 9 and 3/4 looking around. There was no sight of Mrs Potter or Hermione anywhere. This was their first time on the Platform, without being fed, actually being on time and without Mrs Potter.

The train hooted its horn loudly. Mr Potter stood not looking at any particular thing other than the large clock.

"I have to go to work boys" he said still staring at anything but them.

Just as he was about to turn and leave he said to the boys "I want Hermione back home for the Easter break"

He seemed to rein in his magic that radiated around him to warn the boys of his still angry mood.

"So don't disappoint me again"

-8—

A/N: So sorry about the delay. On Friday, we had a guest over and I had to *sob* socialise.

And then yesterday my mum wanted to bond since my dad and sister were out of town. She took me to my favourite restaurant and I was too happy and waay too full to sit up and write.

I wrote this chapter 3 times and am happy to say that this one sucked the least. I'm happy to read anything you have to say about this chapter. So review my people. I honestly do take everything you say into account.

Welcome to the story: Aleucard, ForeverTheWhiteTiger, Fizzyink007, dtbtslytherinrose, The Child Who Cried Blood, 07Hermione07, RobinQ, roseberrygirl, Black-Sakura-44, Ingma, angel897, sugar-scribble.

And you lovely people, I got amazing feedback on the last chapter. Keep 'em coming peeps: Booklover9477, cbred13, angel897, MoonWatersLight, Elizabeth, irishblue9, nikyta, LK-HoGwArTs-hEaDgIrL, Romantically_Distant [THAT is exactly what I thought when I read through it again, I hope this doesn't feel forced (: ], TsukiyoTenshi, KEZZ 1, Ceralyn[I love you. There I've said it], Lorem tenebrae, LeonaMasha [I was thinking Sirius could be Eoin Macken, that man is a sex-god], NorthernLights25, amrawo, Humanized Serenity, INACTIVE Poptart-Freak, Kmj, random yet lovable.