Blind Hope

Chapter 14

Three weeks had passed and still neither John nor Rodney had made contact with Atlantis. Elizabeth put on a strong face for everyone on the outside but on the inside she was mess. Teyla was no different. As the days passed Elizabeth's hope that they would return miserably faded. However being the leader here on Atlantis she couldn't afford to have doubts. Elizabeth tried as best she could to run things as usual in Atlantis though it was hard. Her head scientist and military leader were gone making everything chaos. Aiden had mentioned that Rodney would be happy to know how much so many depended on him. And that was one of the few thoughts Elizabeth actually smiled at and really meant it.

Teyla however was not as eager everyday to try and go on with business as usual. She had miscarried and for a short time the symbiote had taken over again. But it was only for a few hours. John was supposed to use the device when the time came but seeing as he was missing Beckett had too. It worked out and Teyla was once again free from the symbiotes mind grasping control.

So many things had gone wrong. One moment she was happily expecting a child with the man she so truly loved. She was living in the city of the Ancestors, safer from the Wraith then ever before. Her people could finally be at peace instead of constantly fearing the Wraith's return.

She had headed to the north peer that day. In spite of the fact that it was raining outside. Though it was not as bad as the storm they had just faced head on earlier, the conditions motivated many to just stay inside. She hadn't been very sociable lately but who could blame her. Teyla kept her guard up constantly but when she was alone she felt safe enough to just let her true emotions show just a tiny bit. In the first week all Teyla had seen of Elizabeth was the strong leader that she was. Teyla hadn't a clue how she did it and had suspected she was putting on the same act as herself. And one night when Teyla found herself roaming the empty halls of Atlantis again she saw Elizabeth on one of the balconies. Teyla was going to go see her but when she noticed that she was crying she thought it best to let her be. Elizabeth needed this time to herself just as much and she did herself.

As Teyla roamed the dark and deserted hallways of Atlantis in the north peer she let her thoughts race through her mind freely. Endless questions that had been haunting her all day crept into her mind. And the one thought that had terrified Teyla the most kept screaming in her mind to be heard. What if he didn't come back?

Teyla had tried as hard as she could to shove such negative thoughts into the back of her mind hoping that if she did they would just go away or be trapped there. But they wouldn't and it was something she forced herself to face. Teyla walked outside onto a balcony that overlooked most of the amazing city. Trenching rain greeted her the moment she stepped outside. Teyla greeted it back, looking up at the sky with her eyes wide open at first staring at the dark sky that was illuminated by lightning.

She closed her eyes and let the rain fall freely onto her. It came thundering down but it was as though it slowed itself in an instant before splashing down onto her face. She walked to the edge of the balcony and leaned on the railings, her hair and clothes completely soaked. Her mind was swimming through an ocean of emotions constantly. So many things weighed on her mind but for these few moments as she stood out on this balcony they all disappeared. The constant voice of her inner mind was no longer there and the only noise that could be heard was the sound of thunder rumbling through the sky and the rain pouring down from the sky above. Everything else was completely quiet, not a thing to be heard.

Seems like just yesterday
You were a part of me
I used to stand so tall
I used to be so strong
Your arms around me tight
Everything, it felt so right
Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong
Now I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hanging on

Teyla woke the next morning to the soft and gentle sound of the ocean waves. The sun was shining into the room brightly, illuminating the entire room. Teyla waited for a minute before she opened her eyes trying to just imagine for a moment that everything was all right. John was lying next to her and that she was still pregnant. But this was now just a reality that had become a memory and now it was a fantasy.

Teyla opened her eyes and despite her hopes there was nobody next to her. Nobody was there to start her day with a morning kiss. The fact was, was that he was gone and there was nothing she could do to change that. At least not at the moment.

Teyla lay there for a while just staring at the empty half of the bed. The sheets were untouched, the pillow still perfectly adjusted without a wrinkle mark on it from ones head. Teyla placed her hand on it before she got up and ran her hand over it. "Please be okay John. Please." She softly whispered her soft voice only to be heard by the silence around her.

Two more weeks had passed and the small amount of hope that remained of finding Rodney and John was slowly dissipating. Teyla and Elizabeth had just gone on a mission by themselves earlier that day. The planet was abandoned completely so they saw it safe enough to go.

Despite the arguments of Ford the two of them went by themselves and came back within four hours. Completely unharmed and safe. Both of them had been waiting for a chance to be alone so that they could talk about what was happening. As soon as they got through the gate they did some recon of their immediate surroundings and walked around checking out the area.

And for the first time in a long time, Teyla was able to talk to somebody who could really know what she was going though. Things like having to be a leader of her people, having the one she loved missing and to her surprise losing a child.

It had been about three years before they had come to Atlantis. Elizabeth was about six weeks pregnant when she found out that she miscarried. Things had changed between her and Simon and from then on everything was different. They tried to ignore it but it was simply impossible.

Elizabeth had thought it be best if she just end things with him before she came to Atlantis. She knew that despite their efforts her relationship with Simon was heading down the tubes and it was better for both of them if she ended it then. Elizabeth couldn't ask of him to wait for her. All he would be waiting for was an empty relationship when she returned –that is if she ever did-.

Though it had taken a while for her to convince herself that she had made the right choice by doing so, it all eventually worked out. Her first impression of Rodney McKay was that he was some self-righteous, arrogant, know-it-all scientist. But after some time of really getting to know him shesaw right past that huge wall he had surrounded himself with. Today he was the man that she found herself completely in love with.

Two more weeks had passed with no word to be heard from John or Rodney. Bates and Ford had lead two more rescue teams to the planet where they had been but there was no sign of neither John nor Rodney. They had searched high and low and it was as if they were never even there. Their camp had been left, as it once was, everything in its place.

"It's been five weeks." Teyla said as she leaned against the doorframe to Elizabeth's office.

Elizabeth looked up and greeted her with a smile. However it went away just as quickly as it came. "I know," She said as though she were finally accepting the facts. Neither Elizabeth nor Teyla could deny it anymore.

Suddenly the gate activated, accompanied by Peter Grodin's voice announcing, "We have an unscheduled incoming wormhole!" It was late at night and everyone was either on the base or visiting the Mainland. No one was off world at the moment. No one except for, could it be?

Elizabeth and Teyla both ran into the control room to find out what was going on. Both of them secretly wishing it were them.

Grodin paused before he announced it, and double-checked the transmission. "It's Doctor McKay's identification code." He said half believing his own words.

Elizabeth gasped, shocked by what the man had just said. "Are you sure?" She asked trying to make sure she heard right.

"Positive." Grodin said. Elizabeth looked over at Teyla giving her a hopeful look. Elizabeth could tell that she was just a little worried that because it was Rodney's IDC and not John's he may not come through with him. If it was even them at all.

"Do you think?" Elizabeth asked leaving the end of the question in the open, however Teyla knew what she was referring to. Teyla just looked at Elizabeth and began to run down the steps towards the stargate. Awaiting anyone who would come through. "Lower the shield!" Elizabeth said as she ran down the steps, following Teyla and waiting by her side.

The familiar yellow sheet of energy could be seen lowering. Elizabeth and Teyla stood by one another's side staring at the gate adamantly waiting for a traveler to come through.

A mere second seemed like forever as they all waited. Then someone came through. Rodney came through first and quickly turned around as though he was expecting someone to follow. His actions seemed panicked and rushed. And as though he was expecting a follower. Behind him came John but something wasn't right. John stepped through the gate then the blue sheet behind the two worn out men disappeared.

Needless to say John didn't seem like himself. It was more less his actions that brought attention to this. He seemed unsure of himself and unaware of what was going on even though it was right before his eyes.

Everyone stared at the two men that had just stepped through the gate. Then Rodney shouted, "Well don't just stand there get a medical team down here!" His tone was sarcastic but still he was serious. Quickly a medical team had rushed in followed by Beckett.

In a swarm they surrounded both John and Rodney but Rodney insisted that they assist John instead. John fell to the floor and was staring right at Elizabeth and Teyla, but didn't even make a gesture as to show that he was glad to see them.

Rodney pushed his way through the med team and walked towards Elizabeth completely focused on her. Elizabeth ran forward to meet him and hugged him as soon as she could. "I missed you so much." Elizabeth said, "Are you okay?" She asked concerned pushing him back to see for herself that there were no apparent injuries.

"Oh I missed you too. Yea I'm fine though." Rodney said. His attention was drawn back to where John was when he heard his voice.

"No I can't see your damn penlights!" John yelled frustrated. His voice was loud and was clearly heard even up in the control room.

The med team became silent for a moment, as did everyone else. Then Teyla's voice broke the silence. "John?" Her voice was quiet and soft with obvious worry being hidden as best it could given the situation.

Teyla had been imagining this moment for weeks but never thought in a million years that it would play out all like this. John's eyes attempted to focus on where Teyla was. Slowly Teyla moved forward towards him as Beckett's assistants tried to help John. Or so they thought they were.

Teyla's pace quickened as she realized that John couldn't see her coming. She hopped up the few steps that led to the stargate and sat right in front of John. She took his hand and help it, rubbing it with her fingers reassuringly. "Teyla," John said quietly. He knew it was her, he could tell.

"Yea it's me." Teyla said trying to comfort him.

John's eyes fixed on where she was. He must have picked up on where she was by her voice. Rodney and Elizabeth stood there on the other side of the control room helplessly watching the moment play out. "What happened?" Elizabeth asked confused as to how something like this could play out.

"I'll tell you later. Let's just say these people on that planet aren't all that primitive." Rodney said in a more than serious tone. Elizabeth nodded in agreement; there was plenty of time for all that.

"Come here," John said pulling Teyla towards him and into a hug. After a moment or so her let Teyla go and stroked her face feeling a tear as he did so. "Smile," John said trying to cheer her up despite what was happening to him.

Teyla did smile; in fact she couldn't help but let a slight laugh come out. John tucked her hair back behind her ears. "I missed you." Teyla said hugging John again.

John smiled slightly and said, "Well I missed you times a thousand." Instantly Teyla recalled that night on the balcony a few weeks ago.

Teyla stood and helped John too. "A thousand and one?" She asked with a small smile on her face in a playful tone.

"Yea, a thousand and one." John said. The med team then helped John off to the infirmary. Teyla followed them closely as well.

One of Beckett's assistants walked up to Rodney with a first aid kit and tried to help him. "Don't touch!" McKay snapped at the poor guy. The person just shook their head and continued to follow the rest of the med team to the infirmary.

Elizabeth turned his head to look at her and hopefully give the guy a fair chance at getting out of there. "I love you." She said looking into his eyes meaningfully.

"I love you too." Rodney said seriously pulling Elizabeth into a big hug. "But I'm back now, and I'm not going anywhere." Rodney said comfortingly.

"I know." Elizabeth said.

TBC

Authors Note: So sorry this one took so long too. I've been kind of busy and I had to restart it. But I hope you liked it. I tried to make it longer but I didn't want to go into the next chapters plot. SG1 crossover is in the making. What did you think about the McWeirness? Well please, please, please review and thanks so much for being understanding of what happened. I really appreciate it. Please REVIEW!