Author's Note: There is no excuse for the delay in updates, but I'll make them anyway: graduated last year, started college, working, writing other things, etc. And also, the last season of Gossip Girl. Absolute crack. Sorry. Hope you like 'O Brother, Where Bart Thou?'! Enjoy!

O Brother, Where Bart Thou?

Blair went home after the Snowflake Ball- she and Dan both slinking away with their tails between their legs, ashamed for being so petty when lives were at stake- and changed into her favorite silk pajamas, before sitting up in bed for hours, staring at her phone and her computer screen in intervals, willing either to change. In the background, Audrey sang songs about the rain in Spain and Henry Higgins- and hadn't she put Funny Face in the DVD player?- but she couldn't focus on it. She was too worried, her stomach filled with lead and her muscles cramped up in agitation. Was Bart going to make it? How would Chuck take this? He and the rest of the van der Bass clan had run out of the ball in a harried, frantic mob, and she hadn't gotten a chance to talk to any of them about it. And she was furious at Chuck, yes, but she was his friend- she would always be his best friend- and she was concerned. Serena could handle this, she was sure of that, but Chuck didn't handle serious- particularly serious loss- well, and she was afraid for the outcome.

Her phone beeped to life around two-thirty in the morning. With shaking hands, she clicked open the text from Serena and read:

Bart's dead

A hand flew to Blair's mouth and she felt her heart thud in her chest.

How is everyone? Are you okay- is C? she texted.

Serena texted back quickly, saying:

I'm okay. My mom's a wreck. E's shocked. C's gone.

Gone?

The second they told us he stormed out of the hospital.

And went where?

It's C. Who knows?

Shaking slightly, Blair punched in a text to Chuck, and it read:

S told me what happened. I'm so sorry.

She didn't receive a text back, so she called the next person she felt she needed to speak to.

He answered on the fourth ring.

"Dan."

His voice was thick with sleep, but he woke up a little when he said, "Blair?"

"Bart died."

There was a long pause on the other end of the phone, and then: "Shit."

"I think Serena's okay, but Chuck stormed out of the hospital," she said. "I'm worried."

"About Chuck?"

She closed her eyes for a minute, saying, "You don't know Chuck like I do, Dan. He's- He's not as strong as he looks, and his dad was- You know his relationship with his dad wasn't the best."

"I know," Dan said sadly.

"But he loved him- all Chuck ever wanted to do was have his father's love and- I- I don't know if he got that," she told him, her voice breaking off at the end as tears burned in her throat. "Shit- what's going to happen?"

Sighing, Dan said, "I don't know, Blair."

She was silent as a hot tear dribbled out of her eye.

"I wish I did," he continued. "But I don't."

The following day was a Saturday. Dan woke early- when the sky outside was still pale, devoid of sunlight- and went out into the kitchen to make coffee. As the machine gurgled and dripped, he leaned against the counter, staring across the kitchen and living room, to the view outside the loft's windows. In the weak December morning, the kitchen was cold, and Dan hugged his arms to himself in his plain, white t-shirt, shuddering once. His mind was on a thousand different things, but at the forefront were two topics: Bart Bass's death, and the fact that he had told Blair he loved her at the Snowflake Ball.

What did Bart's death mean? for himself, for Blair, for Serena and Chuck? He wasn't going to lie and say his life was going to change drastically because the mogul had died, but he was sorry. This was Lily's husband- Serena and Eric's stepfather. And he didn't exactly appreciate Chuck Bass, but this was his father- not even the king douche of the Upper East Side deserved to lose his father, especially so young and so suddenly. And from what Blair had said, Chuck wasn't taking it well, and this was causing her serious distress. It was enough to make Dan ache with her- if not for Chuck, then for the girl he loved.

But, did he love her? He knew he had told her he did at the Snowflake Ball, but that had been in the heat of an argument- as ammunition to make her falter and lose her grounding, right? He couldn't tell- had nothing to compare it to. He had told Serena he loved her once upon a time, but this didn't feel the same as before. He didn't want to discredit his past feelings for Serena, but he felt different this time. Something about Blair made him think of buying houses and picking out baby names, about bringing her home to meet his dad and trying to impress her mother despite his address. It wasn't just teenage, let's-make-out-against-a-wall-at-school lust- though that was certainly a part of it. He appreciated all the details of her- not unlike how he had appreciated Serena- but he also couldn't stand her. Like when she and Chuck played games, when she toyed with him, when she let her snobbish tendencies shine through and wouldn't allow him the same luxuries of being self-righteous. But through it all he wanted to be with her- more than anything, he wanted to be with her.

Was that love though? He couldn't tell. And even if it was, did she feel the same? She certainly hadn't rushed to return the feeling in the hallway that night, so he didn't know. And he wasn't about to repeat those three words when she wasn't asking about it- when she was so worried about Chuck and focused on derailing the freight train of a nervous breakdown he was probably having.

"Dan?"

Looking up, Dan saw his dad- eyes squinting, hair messy, half-asleep- shuffle into the kitchen.

"What are you doing up?"

Glancing over at the coffee-maker, Dan said, "I couldn't get back to sleep. Figured I'd make some coffee."

"Are you okay?" he asked, his voice rough with sleep. "I didn't really get a chance to talk to you after last night."

Dan shrugged. "I'm fine. It's everyone else I'm worried."

"I'm sure Serena will be fine," Rufus said, coming around the island, rubbing his face. "She's a strong girl."

I'm sure she'll be fine too, Dan thought. She's not the most of my worries.

"Yeah," was all he said.

Rufus considered his son for a moment. "She's not what you're worried about, is she?"

Looking over at his father for the first time, Dan sighed and shook his head. "I don't- I don't really want to talk about it though."

He nodded. "Okay, just- just know that- Dan, I've been through it all, and I'm always here if you want advice or anything, you know that, right?"

"I know, Dad, thanks."

"Just, let me know if you want to talk."

Dan nodded, "I will, Dad."

Giving his son one last lingering look, he gave his shoulder a squeeze, grabbed a water bottle from the refrigerator, and left Dan to his thoughts and a full pot of coffee.

"He's holed up in his suite at the Palace," Serena said over her lunch of chicken and rice that Sunday. Seated across from Blair at their favorite little cafe restaurant, she looked tired and pale, but still beautiful. "My mom called the hotel and apparently he checked in yesterday."

This made Blair pause over her mushroom soup, asking, "Have you spoken to him at all?"

Serena shook her head. "He's not answering any calls or texts- and with an endless supply of alcohol up there, I'm kind of concerned for him."

"God," the brunette replied, her heart thudding in her chest. If Chuck wasn't responding to anyone at all and he was dealing with this tragedy on his own, how did anyone know he hadn't done something drastic up in the hotel by himself?

Seeming to read her best friend's thoughts, Serena said, "The hotel says they've been sending up food though, so at least he's alive."

Blair let out a breath she wasn't aware she'd been holding, and regarded her friend. "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine," she replied, shaking her head as if to dismiss any concern for her welfare. "Dan's been great- and Aaron too, so-"

"Dan?" Blair asked, before she could stop herself.

Nodding, Serena shifted the rice around on her plate with a fork, saying, "Yeah, we talked on the phone last night and he's been texting me, checking to see how I am."

Part of Blair wanted to appreciate Dan's kindness, but a bigger part of her wanted to find him and demand to know why he felt the need to be Serena's shoulder to cry on when Serena had a boyfriend and Dan had told her he loved her.

"What?" Serena asked, looking up and seeing Blair's preoccupied and troubled face. "What's the matter?"

Quickly, Blair composed herself, saying, "Noth-Nothing." Grabbing her bag from the back of her chair, she stammered, "I'm going to go try and call Chuck again- I'll- I'll be right back." And she got up, making a beeline for the bathroom.

Once inside, she considered herself in the mirror.

Dan had told her he loved her. Why was this so difficult for her to process? Why couldn't she decide whether she wanted to hear those words from him, or whether she was disgusted? She had waited ages, wanting desperately for Nate to say those words to her. She had even wanted to hear them from Chuck. But now that Dan had said them- sincerely and passionately, if not angrily- she was turning from them in a complicated knot of incomprehensible feelings.

With week hands she flipped open her phone and called Chuck.

It went straight to voicemail, so she hung up.

She stared at herself in the mirror for a minute more, before someone else was entering the room and she was going back to Serena.

By the morning of Bart's funeral, Dan and Blair still hadn't properly spoken, no one had heard from Chuck, and nothing felt right for the day designated to say good-bye to a family member and friend. Blair's mother and Cyrus were giggling and kissing and talking about Paris, Dan's father was sneaking off to places unknown, Blair was trying desperately to get a hold of Chuck, and Dan was trying to figure out whether or not he should go over to Seren's penthouse and comfort her, or whether he should just wait to see her at the funeral. As Jenny was going over to see Eric, he decided he'd come along and offer Serena his support.

He found her staring at herself in her mirror, dressed in a black dress with a thick necklace, lookig tragic and beautiful. When she glanced him in the mirror she turned around and smiled, saying, "Hey. I wasn't expecting to see you."

Hugging her briefly- once more surprised at how touching her barely affected him- he said, "I figured you'd need an extra friend today."

"I do, thank you," she said. "And thank you for being there for me the past few days."

He waved it off. "Don't mention it." Pausing, he thought of Blair, then found himself asking, "Have you heard from Chuck?"

Serena didn't even seem phased by the question, and she shook her head, saying, "No, but I'm sure if anyone can find him, Blair will."

This made Dan's stomach drop, and he swallowed.

"Serena?"

Turning, they both saw Aaron entering the room, looking at them suspiciously.

Serena crossed the room and kissed him, hugging him tightly in the doorway. Dan looked away awkwardly, trying to figure out whether or not he could text Blair and ask her if she was okay without seeming rude.

"Dan," Aaron said.

"Hey Aaron," he replied.

"I just thought I'd come and see how you were doing," Aaron explained to Serena.

Serena smiled, saying, "Yeah, I'm okay- I'm just worried about my mom and Eric... and Chuck. But I'm okay."

The three stood together in an awkward triangle for a moment. Dan wondered if he should say something, but nothing felt appropriate.

"I'm actually going to be driving over to the church with just my family though, so I'll see you guys there?" she prompted.

The two nodded and turned, leaving the room.

As they descended the stairs to leave, Aaron leaned toward Dan and said, "If you have any feelings for Serena, I'd appreciate it if you told me now."

Taken aback, Dan considered stopping on the stairs, but kept himself going. In response, he said, "I don't, actually."

"Oh, so you just weren't interested in Lexie because...?" he said. "You've been talking to Serena and checking up on her because...?"

At the bottom of the stairs, Dan turned to Aaron and said, "I wasn't interested in Lexie because I'm interested in someone else- no, not Serena. And I've been here for her because I'm her friend." Shaking his head, he continued, saying, "No need to worry, Aaron, she's all yours," and then he left him behind, exiting the penthouse all together.

When Blair and Nate went to retrieve Chuck from the Palace, she knew that he was a drunken, mourning mess. When she and Nate had to put him into a cab and keep him upright, she guessed that sobering him up before the funeral was going to be nearly impossible. But it wasn't until she saw him hurtling down the hill of the cemetery, throwing himself toward Dan Humphrey, that she realized he was absolutely and completely out of control.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he screamed, and she couldn't follow behind him fast enough.

Looking properly affronted, Dan yelled back, "Excuse me?"

"He's just upset- and drunk!" Blair called after him, trying to grab for Chuck's hand to hold him back.

He snatched himself away and got right up in Dan's face. She watched in horror as he pointed at Dan and spat wildly in his face, saying, "What are you doing at my father's funeral? Do you think he'd want you here?"

Blair resisted the urge to put herself between the two and keep Chuck away from Dan, though Dan was holding himself very well considering.

"Chuck, if this is about the article, you know I didn't write it," he said calmly, and Blair held her breath.

"You think I care about your failed attempt at investigative journalism?" Chuck snarled. Then, without warning, he grabbed the front of Dan's jacket and began hissing in his ear. Blair couldn't hear what he said, but she let out a cry at the way he was grabbing at Dan.

"Chuck!" Blair yelled, trying to pry Chuck off of him. It was no use though, Chuck wouldn't move.

Dan, however, managed to push him away, saying, "Look, Chuck, I'm sorry about-"

"Fuck you!" Chuck yelled. "Fuck you and your fucking family!"

"Stop it!"

Serena was suddenly putting herself between the two, intervening like some kind of golden-haired martyr.

"Chuck, Dan has been helping us! Unlike you!"

Chuck laughed acidically, saying, "Helping you? Do you even know what his family has done?"

Everyone seemed at a loss for words.

"Perhaps it would be best if Daniel left," Ceecee suggested.

"No," Serena countered, making Blair grateful. "Grandma, that doesn't make sense."

"Chuck is Bart's son, it doesn't have to make sense," she replied.

"It's fine," Dan said. "I understand."

As Dan began to back away, Chuck screamed, "You don't understand anything!"

And suddenly, Ceecee and Lily were ushering Chuck in the direction of the church, trying to get a hold of him, Nate following in their wake. And Serena stood, looking angry, on the sidewalk with Aaron, who turned her and guided her toward the church as well. No one looked for Blair or wondered why she wasn't following them, and she preferred this. She glanced at the church and the number of cars that were only just arriving, and she knew she had some time before the funeral began. So, with one look at Dan's retreating back, she hurried over to him.

"Dan!"

Turning, he was surprised to see Blair coming quickly towards him. He was even more surprised when she threw her arms around him and buried her face in his chest.

"I'm sorry," she breathed. "I'm so sorry about Chuck."

Dan held her, wondering if she was conscious of how many people could see them, and said, "Don't worry."

"I was so worried- I thought he was going to-" she cut herself off. "This whole thing sucks."

"It does," Dan said, pulling away from her and brushing her hair back from her face. He gazed at her for a long moment before saying, "You know, Blair, about the Snowflake Ball-"

But she cut him off. Because she knew where he was going with this. He was going to tell her he loved her again. He was going to demand some kind of reciprocation or something from her, and if he didn't get it he was going to end this thing with her. She knew it. And she wasn't sure if she ready. Wasn't ready to say she loved him or end the twisted relationship they had.

"I- I actually can't talk," she said. "I have to go back and- go to the funeral, but I'll call you."

And without another word she hurried away, leaving a very frustrated and confused Dan in her wake.

She did call him the following night though. She wasn't sure if it was because of all this talk of death- of life ending too abruptly and without warning- or because she just witnessed her mother get married to a man she truly, deeply loved. Maybe it was because Serena was jetting off to Buenos Aires with Aaron, or because the sight of Dan standing in her living room before the wedding- even if he was just there to help his sister- had confirmed in her something she had not been able to admit to herself earlier. In any case, she called him as soon as her mother and Cyrus had left for their night at the Plaza, and Dorota had left to stay with some friends in Queens for a birthday party.

"Blair?" he said when he answered.

"Can you come back over?" she asked, her voice pleading. "I need you."

He was there in under ten minutes- had been sitting in a Starbucks just up the road when she called- and was relieved to see her standing at the bottom of the stairs as soon as the elevator opened. She didn't look upset, or scared, and he was grateful for this- had been afraid she would need him for a shoulder to cry on. As it turned out, she actually looked perfectly fine.

"I thought about it," she said, as soon as he was standing in front of her. "And I wish the circumstances were different- and I wish things had happened differently- but I- I love you."

Dan felt his chest lighten as her words sank in, and he found himself smiling. "I love you too."

Feeling lighter and happier than she had for some time- despite the fact that Chuck was off somewhere rejecting everyone that cared for him and that her friend was dating her new grundgy, hipster stepbrother. And, without thinking twice, she grabbed Dan by the collar of his jacket and pulled him to her.

Dan responded in kind, putting his arms around her, feeling the silk of her white dress slip underneath his fingertips as he ran them over the curves of her hips. Greedily, she helped him out of his jacket, and pressed her hands against his chest, feeling the fast thumping of his heart underneath his shirt.

"Blair," he said, pulling away.

She gazed into his eyes for a moment, licked her lips briefly, and then took his hand and led him upstairs to her room.

Once inside, she closed the door behind them and said, "For once, just don't talk, Humphrey," and pushed him onto her bed.

He watched her crawl onto the bed as well, hovering over him, the hem of her dress tickling his legs through his pants. She looked beautiful- surreal- silhouetted by the light of the moon, and he took her face in his hands, kissing her hungrily. With deft, hurried fingers, she got him out of his shirt without leaving his mouth, and with the heat of his skin so close to her, she pulled at his hair anxiously.

He couldn't take it much more. He could feel her through her dress- every line and curve and inch of her body- and he wanted her. So, without asking for permission or second-guessing himself, he pushed at the material of her dress until she was helping him get her out of it.

"Dan," she said, pausing as she began to unbutton his pants. Looking him in the eye, she said, "Don't compare me to Serena. That's all I want."

And, as he looked at the vulnerable, pleading look in her eye, he realized how much he truly loved her, how deeply he wanted her, and he took her face in his hands once more and said, "There's no comparison."

Smiling, she kissed him once more, and fell with him against the cool, silk sheets.

Author's Note: Sorry, I don't go into detail when it comes to sex scenes. Hope you liked the chapter all the same!