Disclaimer: I own nothing.

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Holding the phone to his ear as he commandeered lunch time, Richard Castle objected loudly as he monitored his youngest daughter feeding herself pureed pumpkin. 'No we can't do the book launch then. What are you thinking man?

Sebastian was due to finish preschool soon, and so he only had limited time to take this call and get business sorted. 'What ... what? I don't care what Gina says. We're not having the book launch then.'

'What do you mean why?' Knocking his head in an exaggerated manner, he smiles as his daughter giggles at his actions. 'Kate's due in October.'

'Due with what?' Kissing his daughter's heads as he stands up from the table to pace the room, Castle wonders where his publisher is recruiting staff from. Mars? 'Did you fail Biology 101 or something? She's due with a baby.'

'No you can't change a due date,' exclaimed Castle, throwing his arm out, before covering his eyes in disbelief.

'Gareth. Listen to me,' said Castle, stopping in his tracks as he enunciated each word. 'You want to go ahead and launch a book in October, fine. But you'll be using cardboard cut-outs, cos I sure as hell won't be there. I'm not missing the birth of my kid,' finished Castle. He smiled as Shae nodded her head emphatically at his last comment, sending pumpkin flying everywhere.

'No Gareth, my books are not my kids. My books might be Gina's kids, but I have real ones at home.'

Removing the phone from his ear, he suspends belief for a moment as he looks at the handset, before returning it to his ear. 'My god man, you need a life.'

'When Gina gets back in the office, have her call me,' ordered Castle, before he hung up the call.

'Well that was a waste of time wasn't it!' said Castle turning to his daughter, placing his phone on the table. 'And your face is just covered in filth isn't it missy. We better get you cleaned up before we pick up your brother hmm?' murmured Castle as he leant down to pull Shae from her high chair, mindful of the pumpkin seemingly adorning every inch of her. 'Did you actually eat any kiddo, or were you just playing with it?'

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When Gina called later, Castle was strapping his two kids into the car. 'Gina Reeves. Where in god's name do you find the assholes that work for you these days? Is there a place that offers you a prime selection of the idiots from the last decade at a discount price or something?'

When Seb happily piped up 'asshole' as Castle finished strapping him in, he covered the mouthpiece and whispered to Seb. 'That's a bad word Seb. Daddy was naughty and shouldn't have said it.'

As Shae gleefully repeated 'naugh'y daddy' over and over again, Castle found himself thankful that at least she wasn't repeating the other word as he turned his attention back to the call.

'Yes Gina. I'm still here.' Sitting in the driver's seat, he listens to her outline everything she has planned for an October launch. 'I don't care if you managed to score me a spot on Oprah. I'm not launching the book in October. End of story Gin.'

Without breaking a beat, Castle reaches his hand onto the floor in the back to retrieve Shae's dropped toy as he continued the call. 'Increased sales would be nice, but it's not worth the wrath I would face at home...'

'No offence Gina, but my marriage to you was nothing like this.'

Resting his forehead against the steering wheel, Castle sighed heavily. 'Gina. I don't know why I'm still on the phone with you. As the person whose presence you would require at all these shindigs, I am telling you once and for all... don't get me started on Oprah... No.'

Flipping his mobile shut he said 'No!' once more at the silent handset. Feeling slightly better, he plugs in his seatbelt as he adjusts his rear view mirror. 'Ready kids? Let's go and make Mummy's day shall we?'