Yeah I know again haven't written in a long time but hey I'm sorry so yeah.

Disclaimer: I own nothing that you've heard of before.

The ceremony went well….ish…. I spent most of it with my brother and friends which meant I spent none of it with my new 'family', well except for Tsu'tey and Norm. Ku'li who had a part in the ceremony too kept complaining that outsider weren't aloud and should go die in the forest. He shut up when Fear started getting up which I thought was hilarious.

I was awoken from my musings when I felt Fear nudge my arm.

"What's up big guy?"

"It's been a while since we've had a moment to ourselves. I've almost started to miss you"

He was right, as always. When I wasn't training, I was with the kids if I wasn't with the kids I was with either Tsu'tey or Norm. Norm had become a nerdy older brother during my stay here. We were alone now because my brother and co. had been called to speak in front of the council to decide what the Omatikaya will do and the children were out playing.

"You're right my friend it has been a while."

Putting his giant head in my lap he sighed. "I don't like it here. There are too many people, to many emotions, to much going on…"

"I know I don't much care for it either." I groaned. Ever since the ceremony people have gotten friendlier and would come and say hi or try to start a conversation. I liked it better when they threw sticks.

Fear snorted. "Oh please. You'll stay. You have Tsu-Tsu, that geek, the screaming pups and Draak keeping you here."

"I also have Michael, Jake, Gabe, and all of them pulling me there…." then I realized "You make it sound like you're going to leave…" I murmured sadly.

"I'm not asking you to come. I just need some time on my own to think. If I come back or not though I don't know."

"Why? Why can't you stay? I'm sorry I've neglected you, but to leave? We haven't been separated since we first met!" I was seriously about to break down a life without Fear was no life for me.

"I'm sorry Night, but I can't stay here. I hate it here I hate the people I hate the confines of the tree. I hate what you are turning into."

"What do you mean? What am I turning into?"

"A warrior. An idiot that would throw their life away if they were told to, you are losing yourself."

Again I could see where he was coming from. My hate for The People had slackened and my morals are changing and fitting into theirs. I don't even pray to my own god anymore I pray to Eywa. And the warrior comment I don't get. I know Fears distaste for them, he still feels responsible for his future leader's death, and he was a warrior in his own right.

"When are you leaving?"

"Now."

"I will miss you my brother" I said as I hugged his head which was in my lap the entire conversation.

"I'll miss you too."

Fear got up, shook himself out, and gave me one sloppy wolf kiss then ran out the enclosure. I ran to the window to see if I could get one last glance at him. He ran to the edge of the forest and looked up at me. Knowing he could see me I waved, he howled his good bye and took off into the forest.

Brandon found me crying on the floor and hour later.

I couldn't eat or sleep for a couple of days after that. Everything reminded me of why Fear had left. Maybe I should go stay with my brother for a couple of days. My brother and his team all stay at Hell's Gate which isn't a far ride on an Ikran, but far enough to be a pain. Of course when I brought the idea up at breakfast 4 days after Fear left the thought was met with mixed reviews.

"That's a great idea! We've missed your snoring a lot actually." –Jake

"NO! We need every warrior to stay at Hometree! We don't know when the Sky People are coming!"-Jacob

"I think she should go we have enough people as is."-Neytiri

"We'd love to have you back. Maybe we can tinker with your collar and get you back to your normal self"-Michael

"Where's mama going?"-Storm

"No wait! Nightmare why do you want to leave? Did I-we do something wrong….*cough*"-Tsu'tey

"Mama! Jojo unta go woooooah!"-Sunlight

"If you want to go you may. Just make sure to come back soon."-Mo'at

All this said at the same time naturally. After a long debate it was decided that I could go. When asked when I wanted to set out I said right away.

So that's what leads to this point of me packing some of my stuff and telling Mo'at when to put Sunlight and Storm to bed. After Mo'at left with my children Tsu'tey came in.

"Why do you wish to go" he asked in English.

Slightly surprised I replied, "I just need sometime to think. A lot has happened in the past few months and I need to see where I stand on all of this."

"Well I hope this doesn't add to you're thoughts but some of the men wish to seek you as a mate. Ku'li included." Tsu'tey chuckled. I joined in his laughter it became an inside joke that Ku'li would be the one to seek me as a mate after all the stuff he's pulled.

"And how is it you came to know this?" I ask playfully, Tsu'tey gossips worse then old women.

"Some of the men were talking during the hunt. Ku'li was the one that brought your name up."

"Your responds to him?"

"He didn't stand a chance."

I laughed of course, but it bothered me that Tsu brought it up. That was the number one thing I was worried about after the ceremony I didn't know how the mating thing went. Did I choose or the males? Can I say no if they ask? Or did they ask the father and pay through gifts? I didn't plan on mating so it didn't matter until now.

"Hmm you know maybe I would have said yes" I joked knowing he'd catch on.

"If you said yes I'd take you to Mo'at to make sure you are still sane and not possessed"

"What Ku'li has some good qualities. He's a good hunter, he's good with kids, one of our best Pa'li riders, and I here he's good at sculpting." I noticed Tsu'tey's face grow darker after everything I said and chuckled.

"You know I'm joking why so serious? Jealous?" I asked as I walked over to him now done with packing.

"Yes actually I am. I would rather you not speak so fondly of him even if it is a joke?"

"I'm not getting you. Why are you so upset? It's not like I'm serious." Seriously why was he acting like this? …It couldn't be…..could it?

"I'm upset because it pains me to hear you speak like that even as a joke. It pains me because I know that you can choose anyone you want. It pains me to know you might not choose me."

It is. I never thought it would be Tsu'tey. I mean yeah I like him a lot and have liked him since I first met him. But I've come to terms with the fact that he would probably go for an actual Na'vi not a freak experiment like me.

"Tsu'tey uh…..wow… I never thought that…yeah."

"You don't have to answer now. Just give it some thought."

"Okay."

OOhhh how fun. Lets see how complicated it could get!

-Ace Skyler