Author's Note: As an answer to a reviewer, yes, I do update once a week, specifically on a Friday. As to how long I had to wait until the days of the week matched up… Well, I thought of the idea for this story in June or July of 2013, looked at the calendar, and realized that the next year would work out perfectly. So I wrote a chapter or two, and stored it away
[Peter Pettigrew]
Friday, October 24, 1980
Hello, Harry. I haven't written lately, I've been busy. The war isn't going well. The Death Eaters are attacking wizards and witches now, instead of muggles. And we have no idea why, what they're looking for, or if they're just killing to kill. And there have been disappearances, which are even scarier. I can't tell anyone else, but it really terrifies me, Harry. How do people live like this?
Everyone else seems to be fine, by the way. No one else is even ruffled at the idea that their families could be punished for their actions. Or that they themselves could be killed. But I'm not like that. I'm not as brave as Sirius, or James. Or Remus.
And you know what? That's fine, I'm being reasonable. It is perfectly logical to be afraid. They're insane if they think they can get through this without getting hurt. It's madness. I didn't want to say this, but I have to confide in someone, and my friends just won't listen to me.
I tried to bring it up, and they just tell me that I have to get passed it, and that I have a duty to those who can't protect themselves, and even that I can't let my fear control me.
And sure, those are great things to say. Write them on a scroll, will ya? But it doesn't help me. I'm scared, Harry, and motivational speeches aren't helping.
I know that I should help people, but I've never been as brave as James and Sirius, or even Lily and Remus. I'm just not made that way. Sometimes I wonder if-
I just, I know what I'm supposed to do. I need to fight, and help people, and do my part. But goddamn it Harry, I'm not ready to die.
Why do I need to be the one to fight? I wasn't made for this, I'm not like them, I didn't ask for this. This stupid war, I wish it was over. I can't do this, it's destroying me.
I feel bad for the muggles, I really do, but I just can't help them. I don't know what to do. I have to keep fighting. I can't let my friends down. I hope to Merlin that this is all over by the time you read this, Harry, because I can't keep doing this for much longer.
I shouldn't be unloading onto you like this. It's just, I'm writing down what I think, and suddenly it's a diary.
I have to keep fighting. That's it- that's the bottom line, I have to. I'm in this war, and I can't back out. I don't want to die, Harry. I know I'm repeating myself, and I'm sorry. But I just can't get the war off my mind.
James says he's going crazy, away from the battle, but I can't see how. I'd give anything to stay safe at home.
I keep going back and forth. I shouldn't do this to you. I'll keep it to myself.
What else can I talk about? You? Yeah, you. You're doing pretty great, Harry. You smile and laugh a lot more than you did the last time I visited. The crying hasn't changed, but that's normal for babies, right? Yeah, I'm pretty sure it is. You also wiggle a lot more, that's fun to watch. And then there's… Well, er… Oh! You're making more sounds, don't know what they're called, and…
I'm sorry, I can't concentrate. I better just leave it at that.
-Peter
Author's Note: Hello! So the general consensus appears to be yes to the Mum/Dad, YES to baby Harry, sure-why-not to little nuances of muggle-world, and some characters to make appearances as soon as the plot allows. Did I get everything?
PS- For a little behind-the scenes of what happens between this chapter and the next, you might want to re-read Prisoner of Azkaban, chapter 19. *Wink wink, nudge nudge* It won't be said explicitly in the story, but it will be implied.