Chapter Thirteen
Mrs. Bailey stroked the hair back away from Rebecca's face when Rebecca raised her head, wiping her face on her robe. "Now that you've got that all out, are you ready to talk about it?"
Rebecca leaned back on the side of the bed, holding her arms around her, looking away in shame.
"You know, it might make it easier to deal with if you just say what you're feeling," said Mrs. Bailey.
"He knows what Wei did. How can he even look at me?" He must think…."
"What do you think Adam thinks?"
"The way he thinks about the saloon girls in town. He'd never say anything to them; he's too polite, but he'd never take one for his wife either. As Wei told me…I'm used…I…I'm unclean," she said, tearing up.
"Hogwash. Rebecca, you did not go there willingly. And whatever Wei did to you, he did not do with your permission. He drugged you and threatened your child to get what he wanted. The only person anyone here thinks of as unworthy is General Wei, and we don't have to concern ourselves with him any longer." She paused. "Look up here at me. I want to see that you're hearing me while I tell you about your husband, because he suffered about as much as you did those three years you were gone." Rebecca looked up. "He also blamed himself for what happened to you, and he was tormented, thinking about what was being done to you. He knew at least part of what you were going through, yet he still wanted to get you back. Does that sound like a man who doesn't want you back now?" Rebecca looked away again, sniffling. "Rebecca, he looked for you, and when he couldn't find you he stopped living in the truest sense of the word. He never said so, but I know…he didn't want to live without you. There was a void…for both of us."
Over the next few days, Mrs. Bailey spent her time telling Rebecca about Adam's life for the last three years, reminding her that what had happened wasn't her fault or Adam's fault. But when she brought up Rebecca's brother, Rebecca's reaction was unexpected. She backed into a wall and began to scratch her arms again, causing Mrs. Bailey to call for help.
After Rebecca had lain down for the evening, Mrs. Bailey spoke with Adam at dinner. "Adam, do you remember how she was before…especially about her brother?" Adam nodded. "She's lost something. I don't know if she'll have the same outlook she had. She's finally seeing that there are some people that have nothing good in them. And it's a bitter dose of reality because it's her brother that she's starting to blame. I think we need to know what his part in all this was."
"She's the only one who knows that. I only have guesses."
As they sat at the dining table, Mrs. Bailey reached over and patted his arm. "We'll start on that tomorrow. And I think she's ready to come out of that room. Dinner at the table will do her good. She needs to become accustomed to being around you men again without thinking you believe she's dirty. We'll do a little at a time. Did you make any progress talking to her today?"
"I took AJ to her and sat on the side of the bed while she gave him his bottle. She wouldn't look at me. But she watched later when I got him to bounce on his legs on my lap. I actually caught her smiling."