Book XIV: Kiba

Kiba trudged down the street, feeling off-balance and completely out of sorts. There was no way this was happening. Not really ACTUALLY happening in the sense that it wasn't some huge joke, but real reality! He'd only just returned to Konoha an hour ago with Tenten and Hinata, the three of them scrambling to get back from a mission that had taken a day longer than expected just so they could make it in time to crash Naruto's birthday party. AND THIS WAS WHAT THEY'D COME HOME TO?! All of his plans to bully information out of Naruto were dashed, because that idiot was-

Kiba shook his head fiercely, not wanting to think about the thing that made his skin crawl and his stomach turn sour and his blood boil in his ears because it was not a fucking joke this time! He felt gross and twitchy, his brain running in a constant loop of suspicion and betrayal as he re-thought every moment he could recall that he'd ever been smiled at, or come in physical contact with Naruto or Kakashi. Neither of them had EVER given a sign - and being from the Inuzuka Clan meant Kiba was quite good at reading body language, thank you very much! - that their preferences were anything but normal! Well...admittedly, Kakashi might as well have been neutered with the kind of reactions he gave to anyone, but that still fell into the same category of "NOT GAY".

Huffing out a frustrated snort, he shoved his hands in his pockets and kicked at a small pebble. Had they both been hiding it the entire time? Locking it all away and secretly indulging their perverse desires with whatever small contact they could get without being found out? Shuddering and swallowing back the urge to spit out the bitter taste in his mouth that only made his stomach curdle and twist uncomfortably, he clenched his fists and hunched his shoulders as he walked aggressively forward.

No, that couldn't be right. He didn't want it to be right, because every instinct in his body was screaming 'WRONG'! Naruto was too stupid and too open to hide something like that. Up until a few years ago the blonde's crush on Sakura had been unwavering and genuine. Hell, Kiba could practically smell it on Naruto every time he had been near the kunoichi, which had only made Hinata's infatuation all the more troublesome and painful to deal with. On the other hand, Kakashi would have been able to-

Kiba's stomach clenched and rage howled in his ears as he kicked viciously at the dirt road to scatter dust and pebbles in a wide arc in front of him. Kakashi wouldn't do that! He was a god damned SENSEI! Sensei's don't do that! Akamaru's heavy bulk leaned into his hip, and he could feel the dog's soft whine urging him to calm down as he absently scratched behind Akamaru's neck. Okay, Naruto was an idiotic fruitcake to begin with, and was just too dumb to accept the fact that there had to be limits to how unpredictable he could be.

But Kakashi wasn't. Kakashi was the kind of aggravating genius that blew everyone out of the water when he WASN'T trying. He was feared, and respected, and one of the strongest shinobi Kiba had ever known, and damn it he had looked up to the man as a fellow ninken-trainer, and trusted him, AND HE WAS NOT A FUCKING PUFF! He was not one of those creepy old perverts that sometimes haunted the hot springs, 'accidentally' bumping into him as they reached for a towel or a drink!

He WAS NOT the reason Iruka had given their class that god-awful lecture on ethics and relationships being forbidden between Genin and Jounin; the one where he made sure everyone was paying strict attention to him by throwing shuriken at the desk of anyone who so much as looked away from him while he spoke. There was just no possible way that Naruto was-

Kiba shuddered and scratched the unpleasant goose-bumps on his arms, ignoring the insistent pressure of Akamaru's shoulder against his side as the dog's whine pitched down in irritation to a subtle growl. Naruto was stupid, but he wasn't THAT stupid. He was gullible, but he wasn't THAT gullible. He was obsessive about keeping the people he cared about close to him, but he wasn't THAT obsessed! That was just going too far, and there was absolutely positively NO WAY Kakashi was-

"-banging his own student!"

Kiba froze, his entire body going ramrod stiff as all thoughts were cleared away. All sounds ceased except for the slurred voice of a drunk stranger stumbling out of a doorway behind him, and the hushed vibration of Akamaru's growling against his hip.

"Oh boy, you've had too much to drink, you need to stop-"

"I mean...what kind of twisted fucked-up shit is that?!"

Kiba felt like he was standing in a dark hallway, the silence shrieking in his head. The staggering footsteps echoed as the two men crossed the street, one actually voicing the words he had been fighting back. Fighting back because it was revolting. Fighting back because it was disgusting. Fighting back...

"Hiromi! Knock it off, you shouldn't be saying-"

"That Naruto's a tough kid, though. I bet he takes it like a champ-"

...because HE was despicable! The silence screamed louder without the stranger's voice spitting out the hateful vile words that his own mind fought against and swallowed down to churn his stomach. Fighting, fighting, fighting back because those were HIS GOD DAMN FRIENDS! They would risk their lives for him! They DID risk their lives! Again and again, they just darted out there and GAVE their lives up for HIM! FOR EVERYONE! EVEN THIS WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT DRUNK MOTHERFUCKER THAT HE WAS TRYING TO KILL IF SHIKAMARU WOULD STOP INTERFERING WITH THAT STUPID-ASS JUTSU OF HIS!

"Kiba-kun, stop it!" Hinata's voice broke through the silent roaring in his head, and suddenly the putrid stench of that bastard's wheezing breath was blocked by the soft cool scent of her hair as she got between them and pushed back on his chest.

"No one..." Kiba growled lowly, blinking as his peripheral vision expanded beyond the bugging eyes of the man he was no longer trying to choke, but still WANTING to choke so much his muscles howled against the hold of Shikamaru's Shadow Bind Jutsu and Akamaru's teeth clamped and pulling on his forearm.

"Kiba! Step back and let him go! Now!" Shikamaru ordered.

"No one gets to talk shit about my friends except me!" Kiba snarled as his feet flinched reflexively back at Shikamaru's command, never taking his enraged gaze from his target and flashing his sharp teeth in a feral grin.

He felt liberated. Just saying one sentence to one drunk that probably wouldn't even remember it made him feel like he had just taken on the world and won. He let his arms drop while his fingers twitched and ached to be wrapped around that asshole's throat again, stumbling back as Hinata and Akamaru bullied him across the street where they could pen him in against the wall of a building. The idea of complaining at their somewhat rough treatment was fleeting, because the hairs on his arms were still standing up and his nerves were still rattling with adrenaline and killing intent. They knew him well. They knew him best. Tilting his chin, he gave the air a sniff and smirked.

"You're late for the party, Shino," he taunted, barking out a laugh that sounded too wild and malicious in his own ears.

"You are the one who's late for the party," Shino retorted coolly, dropping down from the rooftop and sliding his hands in his pockets. "Which is why we came looking for you in the first place."

"Took you long enough," Kiba snorted. "You're losing your touch."

"I arrived first," Shino said, glancing over his shoulder at where Shikamaru was talking with the two men.

Kiba bristled, tensing up and clenching his fists as he strained against Akamaru's formidable bulk shoving itself against the front of his legs while Hinata's grip on his shoulder never relaxed. He wanted to tear into the stoic bug-tamer for not doing anything! For leaving him to ALMOST have the blood of a civilian on his hands! ...almost... Narrowing his eyes, he turned his gaze to the drunk getting hauled to his unsteady feet by his companion. The man's eyes were wide and focused with fear, and he looked pale and sick, scratching randomly at himself as he hobbled away with his arm slung over his friend's shoulder.

"Your bugs are leeching..." Kiba trailed off, giving Shino a disturbed look.

"Alcohol," Shino stated. "That's because I wish to raise the percentages of that person's chances of remembering very clearly what transpired here tonight. It would be a shame to waste your efforts in teaching him a lesson, even if your barbaric methods were reckless and excessively violent."

"Says the guy who could have prevented it," Shikamaru drawled in irritation, stepping up to them and crossing his arms with a heavy sigh as he gave Kiba a weary dark look. "Are you seriously going to make us baby-sit you?"

"That bastard had it coming!" Kiba snapped, then gave a grumbling sigh of defeat and looked away. "Alright, I know, I know! It won't happen again."

"Promise," Hinata said softly, digging her fingers into Kiba's shoulder and her elbow into his collarbone as she looked up at him with steely watery eyes.

"Okay, yeah, I promise," Kiba responded immediately, cringing inside at the surreal way his brain was so easily interpreting Hinata's expression as both a real threat and a desperate plea.

She sagged back on her heels with a relieved smile as she let go of him to wrap her arms around herself, and Kiba bit back the urge to scold her for being so trusting and soft. Akamaru, however, wasn't so easily convinced. The big dog remained glued to his side with his ears slightly pinned back as they continued down the street, shoulders rolling and legs stiff with alert displeasure. Crap, his mom was going to be pissed if she saw them walk through the front door like that, and he was going to get strips torn out of him even if she didn't know what had actually happened.

Thankfully, he had some time to let Akamaru and himself cool off while they were at Ichiraku. Several weeks ago the whole group of them had made plans to celebrate Naruto's birthday there, and after everything blew up when the blonde had returned home, they all agreed to just keep the plans and get together without Naruto. Kiba pulled out a chair at one of the tables set up outside the ramen shop for the occasion, spinning it around and flopping onto the seat so he could sulk forward against the back of the chair.

Nearly everyone was there, and any questioning glances tossed his way were answered with a non-committal shrug. Tsunade's piercing glare, however, he downright shrank away from and tried to use the back of the chair as a shield. Grumbling about not needing baby-sitters as Shikamaru and Hinata took seats at his empty table, he rolled his eyes and sighed at their lame excuses while he rapped his fingernail on the rim of the steaming cup of tea Ayame set in front of him. He made no other complaints, and he would never admit that he felt a little better having them there to keep an eye on him.

Although it had begun as a simple toast to the absent birthday-boy, prompted by Tsunade, it was Lee who turned it into an extremely awkward and heated debate. All glasses had been raised at the Hokage's call:

"To Naruto! That brat has turned the village upside-down yet again, and I bet he's pleased as punch about it. I'm going to work his ass off when he gets back on duty, but for now I suppose I can wish him happiness today...and for the years to come."

"Oh, that's absolutely right!" Lee shouted exuberantly, his face slightly flushed and his eyes burning intensely as he stood up to raise his glass and clench his other fist close to his chest. "May Naruto-kun always find happiness with Kakashi-sensei as their youthful hearts burn with the passionate flames of love! And may they have many beautiful children together in the years to come!"

There was a tense moment of dead silence as everyone froze, broken a few seconds later by the tinkling sound of something small and metal dropping to the ground.

"Huh...so you really can hear a pin drop," Sai said thoughtfully.

Ino, who happened to be seated next to the pale young man, instantly whirled on him and kicked him under the table for stealing one of her hair pins. Tenten recovered at about the same time, cracking her fist over the top of Lee's head for being an idiot, and Kiba just set his cup down so he could cover his ears and pretend he couldn't hear the uproar. Lee stolidly defended his position because Naruto and Kakashi were officially a couple, and there was nothing wrong with him wishing them all the joys in life that he would wish for any of his friends.

Tenten's frustrated retort that the pair were never going to 'have beautiful children together' because they were both men only brought Lee back to his feet in indignant outrage at how completely unfair that statement was. They could do anything they wanted, and Lee scolded Tenten for being so closed-minded. Whether Sai's calmly pleasant intrusion on the debate was a deliberate ploy to stir things up even more, or it was just Sai being weird, Kiba didn't know or care. All he was desperately attempting to focus on was crushing his ears so he could block out the sounds as Sai's seemingly random comment about Naruto being a toad sage brought on a lot of yelling and confusion.

...and then Shino 'helpfully' explained how some species of frogs were capable of physically changing between male or female when they were in an environment populated by only one sex. Silence reigned again for a brief moment until Ino smacked Sai's hand before he could swipe another one of her hair pins, and started shouting that Naruto did not change into a frog when he went into Sennin Mode! He was a HUMAN MALE! Of course, this didn't deter Lee one bit, and he continued to insist that the two men had every right to a family, just like anyone else.

Kiba groaned and started banging his forehead against the back of the chair, willing the crazy to stop. He felt more than heard Shikamaru's supremely heavy sigh as the Nara youth sagged onto his elbow on the table and started to complain to Sakura about stepping in and ending the ridiculous conversation. It was the fact that Shikamaru didn't finish his sentence that drew Kiba's attention. It was the distantly calculating thoughtful expression on Sakura's face that had him shivering in dread for reasons he couldn't even comprehend. It was the slow smile and sharp devious glint in her eyes as she downed her cup of tea before standing up and walking off toward the hospital that had him just wanting to scurry under the table and HIDE.

Slouching forward, he gave up. It was all Naruto's fault, and the idiot wasn't even there. A chuckle escaped him, and soon he found himself laughing at the absurdity of it all. Hinata's light touch on his arm brought his head up, and he shook his head with a shrug at her concerned gaze. Flopping his arms over the back of the chair, he rested his chin on his forearm and grinned at Hinata and Shikamaru.

"I honestly can't even imagine what Naruto's reaction to this...'conversation' would be," he laughed, flicking his fingers at the continuing debate.

"It would be loud," Shikamaru drawled, propping his chin on his palm.

"Very true," Kiba snerked.

"Lee-kun's heart is in the right place," Hinata smiled softly, lacing her fingers around her cup of tea. "He's just caught in arguing a misunderstanding. Naruto-kun and Kakashi-sensei deserve a happy life and a family, however they decide to create one."

"So, you're okay with all of this?" Kiba asked, trying and failing to keep the slight edge out of his voice.

Hinata paused and looked down at her tea, her smile faltering before she took a deep breath and straightened her shoulders.

"I won't say that I'm not disappointed that I couldn't be what Naruto-kun needed," she said, lifting her chin as the smile returned with a sad shadow to it. "But I've had a few years to be able to understand that and accept it. It still hurts, but it's a good kind of hurt. I'm truly happy that they've both found joy, even though I never thought they'd find it with each other," she said nervously, darting her gaze away as her cheeks turned pink. "And that's okay, isn't it? Being happy that they're happy together is a good thing. They're still our precious friends, and that will never change."

Kiba grunted a begrudging noise of rebellious acceptance, not trusting his mouth to say anything remotely appropriate.

"You're going to have to get over it sooner or later. Just accept it, Kiba," Shikamaru said wryly. "You obviously aren't his type."

Kiba jerked upright and opened his mouth to deliver some seriously venomous retorts. Except his brain stalled on the first thing that he was about to say, and he clamped his mouth shut as he fixed Shikamaru's lazy amused eyes with a withering glare. Gripping the back of the chair, he growled in aggravation as his mind stumbled and clawed its way out of the confusion he'd piled on himself when the phrase 'What the hell is that supposed to mean?!' first popped into his head.

"Good!" Kiba huffed, snatching up his tea to distract himself before glowering at Hinata's quiet snickering.

"Well, one thing's for sure," Shikamaru chuckled, holding out his own cup. "When Naruto becomes Hokage, his reign of terror will never be boring."

"If he becomes Hokage," Kiba grumbled petulantly, raising his glass as well.

"Whatever makes you feel better," Shikamaru shrugged with an amused grin.

"Kiss my ass! I'll be Hokage before he will!"

"Cheers!" Hinata laughed and added her cup to the others with the delicate clinking of ceramic.