OK last super phluffy chapter for a few, gotta get back to business and create a solid plot hahaha I'm SO excited because I'll actually have a good chunk of time to commit to this right now :) First time in a long time! Again I am extremely sorry that the last few chapters have been so short. Life gets in the way. Thank you all for your reviews! They've given me a chance to visit and read YOUR stories too! Speaking of which, please drop by paisleygirl and read her work because it is amazzzzinnnggg. I wouldn't have joined fanfiction if I didn't run in to her story 'Penance' solely to review. I've also had quite an interesting bit of fun talking with Phantom-of-the-Opera-Phan who by far is the greatest 'phan' of POTO lol and for her young age I'd consider an up and coming author after some of her more recent posts. OH and Angel of Mystery-145 is also has a brilliant series that I sat and read from start to finish (Quite a bit of reading though, all of her stories are book length haha, like reading paperback romance novels romance novels)
Fanfiction is by far the greatest place I've ever been! Being among my own species who love to write and read - who are also very passionate about what they choose to write if I might add :) I'm having a lovely time here.
- Eriks POV (again) -
By the early evening hours after exploring every bit of my throne room her curiosity had finally been satiated. Anything that I did have to hide was tucked away in my bed chamber and by some miracle she'd chosen to avoid it completely. In fact, every time that Christine drew close to the doorway she halted dead in her tracks as if there were some kind of magical force field in place there meant to keep her out. Then again if she had decided to cross the threshold to investigate I doubted I would have had the strength to try to stop her.
Now it was a short time until dusk and we were both resting amongst the pillows in the cove behind my organ. Christine lay propped up on her elbows deeply absorbed in one of my old play books she'd plucked off of the shelves - William Congreve's English comedy, 'The Way of the World' while I sat against the wall across from her to provide ambient music on my sitar. Eventually she became so absorbed in the play that she didn't notice at all when I stopped playing to watch her. Occasionally she let out a gasp or girlish giggle, and when her elbows grew sore she would roll over on to her back and hold the book in the air above her.
Without Christine there was never any sweet laughter in my home, no smiles, no peace. My ultimate goal had always been to someday bring her here to gaze upon, to break the endless silence. Now here she sat before me and I still was not satisfied. I wanted to be closer, maybe just sitting beside her was what I needed but I couldn't bring myself to move, unwilling to cause her any discomfort. Her trust was sacred to me so for now watching her would have to be enough.
Never before had I been the allotted the chance to deliberately stare at someone for quite so long in person. I loved the way that her collarbones bridged to her shoulders, the way the base of her neck arched gracefully in to her hairline, or how the lobes of her small feminine ears connected to the corners of her jaw. A few dark unruly curls had come loose from the knot at the top of her head to frame her face, her beautiful flawless face. Here in this light her otherwise readable chocolate brown eye's were now deep never ending pools of black, their irises undetectable.
"Angel?"
"Yes?" I blinked, slightly startled when her attention fell on me. It had to have been obvious that I'd been gawking at her.
She crawled towards me and held out the book out, saving the page with her little finger. "Someday if I am ever blessed with the chance to sing as Diva in the opera again, I hope to hold a fan just like this one. Doesn't she look like a Queen?"
I set the sitar aside and took the book from her hands to see the page she was holding. The woman in the drawing was common compared to the goddess who was now positioning herself against the pillows next to me, but the wide fan clutched in her hands was indeed lovely - maybe fashioned out of lace. A fan like this would be easy to come by...
"Perhaps the costume department will fashion one for you." I suggested, handing the book down to her.
"My mother had a fan." she sighed nostalgically and smiled, closing her eye's. "I imagine it being royal blue or maybe periwinkle with gold tassels dangling at the bottom, but I was so young then that I don't think I remember it properly."
If something as simple as a fan could please my Christine, she would have one.
She was resting beside me now, just the way that I wanted and I never had to move a muscle. Her eye's remained closed, the book cast away, her mouth slightly parted. Was she truly comfortable enough to relax this close to me?
"Angel?" she yawned.
"Hm?"
She rolled on to her side and peeked up at me heavy lidded through her thick fringe of lashes. "If I told you that I felt..." If only she'd finished her sentence I would know the entirety of her thoughts but to my dismay, she appeared to have fallen fast asleep.
"Christine?" I leaned over to face her unsure, and gently nudged her shoulder. What was she going to say? I needed to know! "Christine!"
She bolted up right and her eye's popped open. The combination of how frightened she looked and the shock of her jumping awake sent me reeling back against the pillows. Fear was an expression that I was all too familiar with... I swallowed hard as she focused on me. Had it been wrong to wake her? Would she scream?
Her features slowly lightened and she shook her head and smiled, bringing both hands to her breast. "How rude of me to fall asleep like that. I never meant to - Oh please forgive me?" she asked sincerely.
My chest was heaving and my mouth felt dry but when she smiled and asked for forgiveness relief washed through me and I was able to compose myself. "Forget it." I grunted passively. "Finish what you were telling me before you closed your eyes."
"I - hm..." She bit down on her bottom lip nervously and thought hard. "I don't recall saying anything in the first place."
"How convenient." I grumbled sarcastically under my breath. Naturally as soon as Christine started mentioning any of her feelings the fates would swoop down to hide from me the truth.
A great sadness filled her eye's and she continued to worry her lip with her teeth, twisting her hands together like a scolded child. Seeing this caused me to immediately regret what I'd said, but it was obviously too late. The damage was done and I was at fault. Unable to bare the sight of her in such a state a second longer I pushed myself off of the ground and on to my feet to stand with my back towards her in the doorway. Soon she would ask to leave and I would once again have to become familiar with wretched solitude and the cold bitter loneliness of isolation, all because I could not seem to manage to keep my temper in check.
"Angel?"
Soon all would be lost...
"Erik!" The sound of my name passing her lips was still foreign to me, and the name alone sent an involuntary jolt of seething anger through my veins, but she certainly had my attention, and when she wrapped her arms around my waist I was even further caught off guard and spun around, throwing my hands up roughly to brace myself in the door frame. My aggressive reaction was but a very old and forgotten reflex. When that name was still in use it was always followed closely behind by contact of a painful orientation, first by my mother, and then by the gypsies she abandoned me to. Thankfully I'd managed to take it out on the stony frame and not the tiny woman who now backed away from me looking like she might cry.
Without thinking I stepped forward and pulled her in to my chest, tucking her head underneath my chin. Now it was my turn to beg for forgiveness or I would surely lose her. "Christine... Oh Christine forgive me. I have a monstrous temper." I spoke in to her hair, and ran my shaking hands down her back. There was more that I could have said to sooth her but my words caught in my throat and I was unable to continue. She did not struggle to break away from me. Instead she relaxed against me let out a long sigh of relief.
"You mean you aren't angry with me?" she asked in a small voice, reaching up to encircle her arms around my neck.
That was what she was so worried about?
My cravat was tight and unforgiving, pressing in to my throat as I struggled to maintain an even breathing pattern. This was becoming much more intimate than our embrace in the meadow. Never had someone held me this way. I had to wait for a moment before being confident enough to speak again. She was so close - the closest anyone had ever been. "Before you fell asleep, you started to tell me about something and I was disappointed to never know." I tried to make sense of my behavior, searching my mind for the least damaging words. "And you must remember to only use that name when I can see your face, especially if you intend to touch me. Do you understand?"
She tipped her head back to search my eye's. Our noses may have been an inch apart, maybe less, and I could feel her short little breaths against my chin.
My God.
I anxiously shifted my weight from one foot to the other, struggling to maintain our gaze. This new way of closeness was divine. Her heart was beating so quickly that I could feel her pulse in my finger tips through the smooth skin of her back... How easy it would have been to bend down and kiss her ... The urge was almost too strong to resist but now was not the time. I stood perfectly still.
Christine concentrated on the corner of my mouth, silent and uneasy... and then a look of dawning filled her eye's and she met my gaze again, smiling. "I understand perfectly." her voice was warm and rich, all fear and sadness gone from her eye's and replaced with her familiar angelic affection. The air grew thick and heavy, warm and sweet causing my heart to burst with anticipation, and then to my amazement, she stood on her toes, gaining the extra height necessary to close the distance left between us and pressed her soft lips to my bare cheek. She kissed me? My breath hitched loudly and she quickly pulled back to judge my expression.
My brows drew together as I strained to contain the intensity of feeling growing inside me, desperate to fight the tears now burning, threatening to fall from my eye's. "Christine I -"
And then, without hesitation, she moved to kiss my mask itself as if I did not wear one at all, lingering there against the side of my face. Initially the sensation was so alarming that I felt rigid and paralyzed. If she only knew what hid underneath the thin cover of porcelain, would she then still find a way to be so loving or brave? "Christine." Her name was all that I could think of to say, over and over again it ricocheted in my mind. I crushed her to my chest again and buried my face in her hair, breathing in the scent of her, desperate to calm myself as I overflowed with love and jubilation.
"I think that you worry I might run off, or of worse things." she trailed off and drew her arms under my waist coat and around my middle. "There is no way for me to know."
I took another deep breath and closed my eyes, knowing that I would have to be honest. There was no use in weighing out another option. "That is very true."
"Where else would I run to?"
"I could never dream of leaving this place, or to end our lessons. I have nothing else in this world." Her words from the first night I'd brought her to the throne room rang back in to my consciousness.
"I promise to only use your name with more caution from now on and -"
"No!" I had to interrupt her. "Use it as often as you can, lest I never become accustomed to it. Use it when I can see your face." In time I would be more comfortable to hear her call my name instead of 'Angel' and then at long last I could feel entirely human.
That's all I've got guys, my mind is totally fried _ I apologize if there are any errors floating around haha I'll edit this tomorrow because I am way too tired to bother with it now. Erik's just had his first kisses on his cheeks! I feel totally satisfied with that. It makes me so giddy and happy to write like this :) I'm almost too bashful about it to post! Thank you so much for reading :) Please review and keep me updated on your opinions! Your support means a lot and I really appreciate the input.