A/N: Despite the title, this one is rated T! :P Dedicated to Polarfanfiction, who requested I do one titled as such. Now, I know this isn't what you had in mind, but real acts of seduction won't be in this collection of one-shots :P

Luffy's POV XD Oh, I just though it would be so much funnier this way XD

So I hope you all enjoy~!

Of Seduction

"Meat. Meaaaat, I want meat," I sang to myself as I sat just off the pier. I swung my legs back and forth, waiting patiently for Nami to come along. I had to be patient with Nami. She got angry sometimes if I wasn't. She said we'd spend the day on the island together. Everyone except Zoro had long left to explore the island.

I wonder if he was bored.

Maybe Zoro was hungry.

I was hungry.

"Luffy~!" Nami squealed as she ran towards me, coming from the docks. I cocked my head to the side as I watched her. There was something off about her. I just couldn't place it…

She pressed herself against my arm, her hands gripping my tightly as she embraced my limb.

Maybe she was sick. "Are you feeling okay?"

"I'm feeling great," She leaned into me more. She was acting funny.

"Are you sick?" Maybe there was something wrong with her head.

"Never been healthier."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, Luffy," She sighed, leaning her head onto my shoulder as she began leading me to the streets of the town.

"Oh, so you're hungry," I was relieved, and here I was thinking I'd have to go find Chopper.

"You're not?"

"No! I am!" I said. "Let's eat!"

She giggled, different from her usual laugh. I felt chills run up my spine. I really thought she was sick. But I was sure she'd get offended and hit me if I took her to Chopper. Maybe she ate something funny earlier. Sanji was always doing some kind of weird voodoo love-dovey stuff to her food.

Was Robin acting the same, wherever she was? But I was sure Robin was with Chopper.

She should be fine.

I hoped Sanji was buying meat.

"There looks like a good place!" She pointed, dragging me along with a smile.

"Mm," I agreed. I didn't actually care where we ate, so long as it served meat. We entered the bar and she led the way to a table tucked away in the corner, still holding onto me tightly as we walked. It's not like I minded. I just hoped she wasn't going to be like this while we ate. I wanted to eat with both hands.

Thankfully she sat down across from me, releasing her grip on my arm. But her fingers trailed all the way down to my wrist before breaking contact completely.

"And you would like to order?" The waitress came by, pen posed over paper.

"Meat!" I grinned. "Lots of meat!"

I watched Nami as she gave her order. She smoothed down her skirt and looked over at me, smiling. It looked like a fake smile. I was beginning to worry about her.

"Where are we going after this?" She asked, speaking slowly. She reached under the table and grabbed my hand. I let her hold it for now, but I'd take it back when I needed it.

"Exploring!" I said, trying to contain my excitement. New islands were great!

I looked over at the bar. I was hungry –where was my food.

"I think we should go back to the ship," She said, her hand letting go of mine and touching my knee.

"We just left the ship," I complained. "And no ones there right now. It wouldn't be any fun."

She frowned a little, but plastered that fake looking smile on once more.

Finally our food arrived. It smelled delicious! I pulled my hand out of Nami's grip and picked up a large bone, hanging with meat that was well done. I ate it eagerly, while Nami just watched me for a moment. I frowned as I took a bite.

"I thought you were hungry," I said through a mouthful of meat.

"I get full just watching you eat," She said, continuing to smile. She leaned forward on the table, her arms resting underneath her breasts. When she caught me looking, she grinned even wider.

This Nami scared me.

I felt like something bad was coming along. Maybe she had indigestion.

"Nami, do you need to –?"

"Luffy, if you dare ask that, I will shove your head into the ground and make sure you never see the light of day again," She said, that smile still never leaving her face.

Yes. I was scared. "Sorry."

"It's okay," She said, sitting up and leaning over the table, reaching out with her napkin in her hand. I flinched away, thinking she was going to hit me, but instead she wiped my cheek. I watched her as she trailed her fingers across both cheeks before sitting back down.

"You're sure acting funny," I commented, wary of her as I continued to eat. "Aren't you cold in that?"

"I'm feeling fine."

"Maybe we should take you to Chopper, just to be sure," I set my meat down. "I don't want you to get sick."

"That's sweet, Luffy, but I'm fine," She said, her smile fading a little.

"So you're okay?"

"Mm."

"Ahh~ that's a relief," I said, picking up my meat once more. I called out to the bar, "More meat!"

"Poor girl," Someone was saying nearby.

"The man doesn't even know seduction when such a beautiful woman is coming onto him."

"Come on, beautiful, come over here and sit a while!"

I looked around, trying to see the girl that they were talking about.

"Luffy," Nami was getting scarier. Really scary. I looked back at her, and that fake smile was no longer there. "They're talking about me."

"Oh."

"Is that all you have to say?" She started tapping her fingers angrily on the table. Had I done something wrong?

"Umm... Why are they talking about you and treason?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Sedition. That's treason, right?"

"Seduction," She said, getting angrier.

"Eh? So it's a mysterious word…"

"I give up!" She said, throwing money down on the table before standing up and walking away.

"Come over to our table!" The men continued to call out.

"Go drown!" Nami snapped at them as she marched out of the bar.

I looked at my meat longingly. I wanted to chase after her, but it'd be such a waste of meat… but she'd be angry if I chased her with the meat…

"Nami," I called out, getting up and running after her. I spotted her. "Nami!

"Leave me alone!" She stomped towards the boat.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I'm stupid, and I don't know what you're talking about or trying to do most of the time. I'm sorry."

"I'm angry," She said, not turning around.

I saw that. "I know."

She continued, "I'm hurt."

Eh? "Why?"

"But I love you."

"I know. Shishishi."

"But there has to be a limit to your ignorance," She turned brought her fist down on my head.

"Shishishi," I wrapped my arms around her. "There's my Nami."

"Luffy?" I think I took her by surprise.

"I was worried about you," I squeezed her tightly.

"Maybe I was rushing things," She murmured, lifting her hands to my back and leaning into me.

"Rushing what?"

"Mysterious things," She muttered.

"Eh? Nami, you're so perverted," I pulled away from her. "I thought you liked just hugging and kissing."

Nami face-palmed. "Luffy, one day, I swear you will die by my frustrated hands."

"You can't strangle a rubber man," I grinned.

"You want to see me strangle a rubber man?" Her eyes narrowed into a glare.

"Shishishi. Nah~ Oh! Can we go back and finish eating? I'm still hungry."

She hit me again before walking away.

"Ouch. Is that a no?"