Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or any of its characters. I do own Kumi, though.
Warning: child abuse and bullying (mostly mentions of it), some dark themes, too much fluffiness sometimes, DRAMA!, unbeta'ed. A real rollercoaster (or, at least, it's supposed to be).
Author's note:
So... I took such a long time to post a new chapter that I feel embarrassed at how short it is. Seriously. I discovered Spirited Away fanfics by the end of November, then got terrible headaches mid-December and finally travelled to the beach until two days ago. Anyway, poor excuses, sorry for taking so long to post something.
I'll be going to my hometown (Rio, yay!) tomorrow, but the Internet connection won't be as bad as at the beach and I will have a real computer instead of just my cellphone, so I'm hoping inspiration will come.
On another note, guys, you are awesome! So many reviews for the last two chapters, I was baffled. I love it! That's why I have another note at the bottom of the chapter, please, do take your time to read.
But, first, enjoy the chapter (at long last!):
All Things Are Difficult Before They Are Easy
By Amaryllis D. Namikaze
Chapter XIV:
The Date
"Because they were roses and I was just a dandelion."
- Anonymous
I let my eyes roam around the busy market. I absolutely hated crowds, but watching such a colorful street coming alive while in the shadows wasn't bad at all. Although my one-room apartment came with the calmness of being near the clans' districts, I sometimes missed my old home. I missed how Daddy would spontaneously decide to buy dango or how Mom would stop in many stalls greeting everybody with a familiar smile.
"Kaa-san, it's Kumi-nii! Look, look!" A kid's voice said.
I turned at the mention of my name, surprised at being spotted. A familiar child with chocolate-brown eyes and equally dark hair came sprinting toward me, his lips twisting up in a smile around a lollypop. In a more sedate pace, the child's mother followed him. Except for her hazel eyes lighter than her son's, said child could be her mirror image.
"Kumi-nii, you never come visit anymore," the child, Shiranui Genma, complained. He had gotten bigger since last year, being five already.
I smiled down at him, apologetically. Genma pouted, wounding his arms around my waist and burying his face in my abdomen. I put a hand over his hand, rubbing it softly.
"You've grown, Kumi-chan," said Airi-oba-san, watching me with a smile of her own.
"So has Genma," I replied.
Said boy took a step back, his chubby hands still holding the front of my dark gray T-shit. He had exchanged his pout for a mischievous grin. Looking at his face, it was hard to believe that this cheerful little fellow would become future Genma - apathetic, laidback and whatnot. Then again, Kakashi was supposed to be a dickhead before becoming better.
"Do take your time to visit us, hmm? Bokuo sees you more than I do, nowadays," she said, playing narrowing her hazel eyes at me.
I felt my cheeks flushing in embarrassment. Bokuo-ji-san was Airi-oba-san's husband and a Chūnin. I usually saw him when he was on guard duty or in the mission room.
"Sorry, Airi-oba-san."
She hugged me briefly, "It's okay. Bring your friends over too, yes? Now come, Genma, we have to finish buying the groceries."
"But, Kaa-san, I want to stay with Kumi-nii," the five-year-old complained, trying to escape from his mother's firm grasp. He huffed, turning his head over his shoulder to shout at me and effectively attracting attention at us, "See you later, Kumi-nii!"
I waved in goodbye.
I heard footsteps approaching from behind me, the breathing of this group loud enough for my sharpened senses. Sakumo-sensei had spent so much time drilling tracking techniques in us - being a tracker first and foremost - that it had become instinctual to always be on guard.
"Namikaze Kumi-chan?" Someone called.
I turned around, observing the small group of kids around my age. They were obviously civilian with the way they carried themselves and their spotless clothes. Given the good quality of the cloth, I'd say they were from rich families, probably merchants or regular doctors.
"Yes," I nodded, hesitantly. What could a bunch of civilians want with me?
A dark-haired kid, the one who had spoken before, stepped up. His features were strangely familiar, but it took a few seconds for my usually perfect memory to comprehend why. Ojiro Tatsuya, a merchant's son whose family and associates had been escorted to Suna for the previous Chūnin Exam. I took a moment to praise myself for my good memory, as silly as it sounded.
"Uh," He stuttered, apparently losing his courage. One of his friends, a mischievous-looking boy with honey-colored hair, slapped his back in encouragement.
I tilted my head sideways, curious at the display.
"Doyouwanttogoonadatewithme?" The Ojiro family's oldest son sprouted in a single breath, mingling his words until they became a mess.
I blinked, observing as a couple of kids blushed under my gaze. Seriously, what was wrong with them?
I felt a hand falling over my head, knowing who it was as soon as I felt the chakra signature of this person entering my chakra field.
"Okay, show is over, kiddies," Kihito's voice said from behind me.
Glancing through his fingers to stare up at my friend's face, I saw the Saturobi heir glaring at the group of civilians. Huh. Kihito wasn't the friendliest guy in the world - in fact, he was almost at Uchiha-level - but he also wasn't directly rude. Most of the time, he just kept to himself and let a few witty comments flow into the conversation.
The Ojiro kid frowned, looking genuinely upset, and turned around. Huffing, he stomped away with his group of faithful followers. I stared at their disappearing forms in confusion.
"Ne, Kihito, what was that about?" Almost thirty-year-old mentality didn't meant much when you are reborn instead of acquiring new life experiences, apparently.
He sighed, "Something your brother fears with all his might."
I was really confused. Kihito suddenly smiled down at me, almost condescendingly.
"Forget, you know," his verbal tick made me lose interest. If I started pressuring him, our conversation would be full of you know's and everybody was in agreement that the only thing more annoying than Kihito's verbal tick was Kushina's verbal tick.
Kihito crossed his arms over his chest. His bō-staff was securely strapped on his back, looking innocently harmless. With his dark blue hoodie and black pants, not to mention forehead-protector slightly shadowing his eyes, however, his form was almost threatening. It seemed weird to think of my friends becoming legends and scary in their own way, but I knew enough about the Naruto series to be aware of their future reputation. Even sweet Mikoto would become a Jōnin before retiring early to take care of her kids. Seriously scary notion.
"What were you doing here alone, anyway, Flea?"
"Huh? Ah, I was waiting for Shikaku-san, actually," I admitted. Kihito's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "He sometimes comes to my Fūinjutsu class to play shogi with me. Suzaku-sensei says I need to train my mind to think on the spot or something."
Kihito scratched his cheek distractedly, "Shouldn't you simply go to the Nara compound like always, though?"
I shook my head.
"Shikaku-san promised to buy me my own shougi board," I said and shrugged, amending, "He said I can play by myself to think up new strategies, but it sounds seriously boring."
Kihito chuckled, rubbing my head affectionately.
"Never change, Ducky."
I looked away, pondering over this strange morning. What was it with people telling me not to change? And, really, what the hell was that with the Ojiro guy? I sighed to myself.
This world was so confusing sometimes.
In spite of all his brilliant deduction skills and analytical eyes, Nara Shikaku still managed to be surprised one time or another. He wasn't arrogant about it, but he wasn't all that humble.
(Humbleness had nothing to do with Nara genii, lazy or not, believe it or not.)
Shikaku had been spending an inordinate amount of time doing basically nothing this past year. Technically speaking, he wasn't that upset about it - but if he had to hear his mother hammering away at how much nothing he was doing, Shikaku was sure he'd snap.
Chitarō - the little jerk - was all too happy to point out how he could spend his time training with his teammates, despite being the only Chūnin in his Genin team. Smug bastard.
It wasn't his fault that Inoichi and Chōza still were Genin. Not that he blamed them exactly. However, it did annoy him how much time they had to spend with their new - and absolutely temporary - teammate, Umino Tetsuo, to learn teamwork and formations for the nearing Chūnin Exam.
(Nara rule number four: they could get surprisingly jealous of their possessions.)
Shikaku was in such a sour mood these past weeks that even the mission room's personnel had stopped pestering him about taking B-rank missions with other teams. An unmotivated Nara was equal to a snail refusing to move. Even their teacher, Kurama Murakumo, had given up on making him train individually.
Shikaku wasn't proud of his behavior per se, but it wasn't affecting everybody all that much, so he stopped caring mid-way November. He spent his days tending to their clan's deer, gazing at the clouds, stopping by Inoichi or Chōza's house when they were free and occasionally learning one thing or another from his father (who was remarkably calm at his heir's extreme laziness).
Somewhere around mid-January, when the weather got unexpectedly too cold to stay outside standing still, Shikaku occupied himself by interrupting his cousin's classes. He had known Suzaku ever since they were in their diapers, so it wasn't difficult to notice that it didn't really bother the old Nara when he abruptly entered his house. Tiny Namikaze Kumi didn't seem distressed at his presence during the Fūinjutsu lessons, thus there he stayed.
He had always liked his older cousin Suzaku. He wasn't a distant relative of the clan, like the Kinokawa and Tokuwa families, or even a many-times cousin. His father, Shintō, used to be Shikaku's uncle before he was captured by Iwa nin during the last war. Well, is his uncle, technically speaking. Suzaku's own older brother had fought during the Second War and died, effectively making the then young boy's mother die of depression. All in all, cousin Suzaku was left without immediate family and the only reason he didn't fall into the despair was because of his shared apprenticeship with his best friend under Uzumaki Mito.
Shikaku tried to visit him at least once every fortnight, if only to make sure the older teen was still correctly functioning. When he started to spend so much time with his cousin in January, he noticed the most curious thing. Little Kumi had no idea about his teacher's dark past, but he had somehow managed to make his cousin's days brighter with his shy yet determined demeanor.
And that was exactly why he had decided to buy the small blond a shogi board as a token of his gratefulness. Not that he knew this. Shikaku didn't care either way.
He sighed at his own troublesome conscience - technically he didn't have to buy the kid anything - before bypassing his brother's sitting figure in the living room and heading for the front door.
"Going out?" Chitarō called, smirking like the bastard he was.
Shikaku wondered when his younger brother had gotten even smugger than his usual bratty self. He was fifteen - seriously too old to deal with the brat's rebelling phase. Next thing you know, the younger Nara would be spouting lame comebacks and kissing everything with legs under a skirt.
(He'd know.)
"Obviously," he replied, dryly.
Chitarō's lips twisted into the usual Nara smirk. One would think the most annoying clan in Konoha was the Uchiha or the Hyūga, but they'd be wrong. It was easier to tolerate silent, anti-social jerks than unusually intelligent ones.
"I heard from a little bird that someone was going on a date of all things," he said, trying and failing to sound nonchalant.
Shikaku rolled his dark eyes, "Chita, you're such a little kid."
The younger Nara's smirk disappeared at once, automatically making the older one twist his lips into a mocking grin. Ah. The accomplishment of disturbing younger brothers.
"Only a little kid would think that going on a shopping trip with someone was the same as going on a date," Shikaku continued. "I'm buying a shogi board for an eleven-year-old brat, not making out with a eighteen-year-old girl."
Chitarō narrowed his eyes.
"Kumi is not a brat," was all he had to say, before turning around and lying down on the sofa once again.
Shikaku sighed one more time - just for the satisfaction of it - and went out. As if an eleven-year-old brat could manage to make him excited. Even if said eleven-year-old brat was the most curious puzzle in the world.
Eh.
"Good afternoon, Shikaku-san," I greeted the older teen once I saw his taller form coming in my direction.
The Nara heir patted my head, much like his brother would do, in response. Without saying a word, he started walking and simply followed. The silence didn't bother me - the guy had spent too much time staring at me during my Fūinjutsu classes by now - but it was unnerving in a way. Not because I was one of these people who couldn't help but fulfill the silence, but because Shikaku himself was disconcerting.
The Nara heir was as intimidating as he was caring. I'd seen the way he'd smile at his teammates or tease his brother, but I'd also observed how he could make a grown adult tremble with only a few words. I didn't consider myself especially gifted, but my constant reading had made me somewhat intelligent. Around Shikaku? I might as well have been a retard.
I looked down for a moment, trying to search for the courage deep inside myself. It was easier to talk to Shikaku with someone around, that was for sure.
"Hmm, you don't really need to buy me anything, Shikaku-san," I said. It came out more ungrateful than I was aiming for, but it still sounded more polite than blurting out about how I didn't even like shogi that much.
With his hands deep in his pockets and shoulders slightly slouched, the Nara heir was the definition of bored and relaxed. Only his dark eyes, paying attention to everything and everyone around us, betrayed his alert state of mind.
"Nah, you're a cute kid," he replied, not sounding worried at all about my words. "You deserve a treat once in awhile."
His answer made my cheeks burn like hellfire. He grinned down at me and the way his teeth settled behind his lips was almost devilish. I turned my eyes away at that, practically feeling the amusement dancing off of him.
The series really should show more of the secondary characters' personalities.
"So," Ren made as soon as I arrived at our usual training ground the next morning.
I looked at him, confused.
"So?" I meant to say so what, but it came too rude inside my head.
"How did your date go?" He said, his dirty-blond ponytail bouncing around his head in his excitement.
I gave him my usual response - that is, staying quiet while feeling my whole face burning in embarrassment. I hadn't thought of our trip yesterday as a date. Actually, I had gotten kind of used to being a kid once again, even though my mentality wasn't of one. The whole concept of crushing on someone or going out hadn't passed through my head until now, because my mind was still fixated on the same old instinct of self-depreciation from my previous life.
"It wasn't a date," I managed to stammer out.
Ren's pupil-less forest green eyes pierced me with unusual attention.
"But I thought you liked Shika," he said, though his voice wasn't speculating. He sounded sure of his words.
I thought I was going to faint with all the blood rushing to my head. Rather childishly, I covered my eyes. I wouldn't be able to answer if I kept looking at my best friend's expression.
"I've never liked anyone that way," I answered, more embarrassed than exasperated.
Well, that was lie. I had liked someone that way before. Thing is: middle-schoolers don't take you seriously if you're the freaky kid in the classroom. Needless to say, I had been harshly rejected. As if coming to terms with your homosexuality wasn't hard enough in my old world without others teenagers being cruel about it. The bullying during the last three years of my British life had been especially difficult to endure when compared to the other grades of my educational life.
I peeked through my fingers at the sudden silence. Ren seemed unimpressed.
"But you are always stuttering around him and blushing and," he'd drone on and on about all my little humiliations had I not put my hand over his mouth.
"I do not stutter," I said, trying to sound stern. I do hesitate before speaking, though, my mind betrayed me.
"But you luuuve him."
"I don't luuuve him," I mocked his sing-song tone.
"Who doesn't love who?"
I didn't jump in surprise at the new presence. My chakra field was in the process of being an unconscious action, always floating around me like a cloak. As soon as Chitarō entered my admittedly small range, I had sensed him. His breathing and footsteps should have warned me of his sudden appearance, but Sakumo-sensei had trained us enough to be able to walk around as quiet as the night.
"Kumi-chan says he doesn't love your brother," Ren quickly filled our friend in the news.
Chitarō quirked an eyebrow up. I glanced away, pretending to observe the trees, because this expression reminded me of his older brother, consequently reminding me of Ren's earlier words.
Why did Nara look so much alike?
"Aniki told me off yesterday for teasing him," Chitarō admitted, sounding sullen. "So, yeah, your gossip was wrong, Ren."
"Hey, I don't gossip, Chita!"
I was only too grateful they decided to drop the subject. I didn't want to think about Shikaku anymore. Not because in this world being homosexual was as bad as being in my old one, but because I wasn't ready to face the consequences of pondering over my feelings.
This world didn't care about gender. You could go and kiss anyone you liked. Clan heads were expected to produce heirs, of course, but no one would bat an eyelash at having a consort or at being in an affair or at homosexuality itself.
I should be content with the good news. But like the saying goes - old habits die hard. It was easy to pretend that I had never seen my Father's disappointed gaze or Sister's wary glances or Bullies' disgusted eyes. By now, it was all too simple to wake up and think nothing of my old life - to think of this life as my life.
It was in moments like this that I felt as if I had received a slap right in the middle of my face. In short moments of blushing under my best friend's teasing words due to a silly phrase such as You like Shikaku.
I was name eternal beauty in this life because I was beautiful, but I didn't feel beautiful. I looked at myself in the mirror when brushing my hair or washing my face and didn't think much of it. My memories were blurry, my old face was a ever-confusing image, but it was there. The feeling of defeat, of depreciation, of utter shame.
Glass shards weren't that easily repaired.
Me again:
In order to celebrate the mark of 200 reviews, I decided to post a side-story (kind of, whatever) to All Things Are Difficult Before They Are Easy. I was planning to post it after finishing this one or at least establishing major plot points, but I ended up changing my mind.
My idea is to let your guys give me prompts of what you'd like to see being written in a drabble or one-shot format. It doesn't have to be canon with All Things Are Difficult Before They Are Easy at all. You can request things that haven't happened yet and probably won't happen here, but you wish to see anyway. You can request a drabble about Kumi's childhood. You can request anything really.
I'm not saying that this "side-story" of sorts will or will not be connected to this story. You can prompt me and I will see what can be done about it. I'll just say at the beginning of each chapter if it's canon in accordance to my SI-OC story or not.
It's not posted yet since no one requested anything, but I'll try to post the first chapter as soon as someone says something. Next chapter of All Things I'll confirm this side-story's existence, don't worry. Or you can simply check my profile for new stories. Whatever suits you the most.
I hope you guys understood my idea. If not, just send me a PM (and do try to be kind about my absurdly horrible English in this note, gosh.)
Until next times, fellas!
(Can someone say Finally at the appearance of a taste of romance?)
(Brownie points for Womanizer!Shikaku?... Anyone?)