-"Nobody loves or hates more passionately than a madman." -
She heard the door open and she smiled. That hadn't taken long at all. She finished zipping her dress and turned to sit on the bed, facing the door. She was happy he was home and couldn't wait for him to crawl into bed with her. She couldn't wait to feel his rough hands on her and his mangled lips pressed into hers.
"Hi honey," he slammed the door behind him, the walls and window shook. He stood next to the door, staring at her. "I'm home."
Something felt off. His tone was slightly different from what he normally used around her. It seemed more like when they had first met. It sounded more nasally and with more of an acid edge to it. Plus he had slammed the door. Well, she was used to him being overly rough with things, not realizing, or caring for that matter, about his own strength. Still, he didn't usually use that amount of force just to close the door. No, something was definitely wrong. Shit.
"What's wrong, Jack?"
Ah, she was quick to pick up on things, his Angel. "Nothing's wrong, cupcake. I just missed you."
She smiled at him. Maybe she had imagined exactly how hard he had slammed the door. She struggled to swallow the lump of fear that had risen in her throat. She hesitantly lifted her arms up to reach out for him.
"I missed you too. I'm glad you're back."
He smiled slightly and stepped towards her, taking her face in his hands. He tilted her face up to look at him. Holding her there like that, it took every ounce of control he had not to snap her neck in anger. "Oh I bet you did. Listen, I want you to, uh, do me a favor, sweetness."
She smiled cautiously against his warm calloused hands pressed on either side of her face. She struggled again to choke down the still growing lump of fear in her throat. She didn't like the way this felt. Something was definitely still off. He wasn't hurting her like he could, like he had, but he wasn't exactly being as gentle as he could either. She didn't like the way his eye's looked either. Even though there was no harsh black make-up masking them they looked just as dark as they would when he wore the make-up, when he was the Joker.
"You know I'd do anything for you, Jack."
A small laugh escaped his half smile. "Of course you would, sweetness. I need you to look at me…"
She interrupted, confused and staring into his dark, ominous eyes. "I am looking at you, Jack."
His grip on her face instantly tightened, the half smile gone from his lips. "No, no. You wait until I'm finished talking. Oh, and stop calling me Jack."
Oh god. Now she knew something was dead wrong. She swallowed hard and nodded against his grip on her face. She silently started praying that she could somehow fix whatever was wrong.
He licked his lips, nodding back at her. "Good girl. Now, as I was saying, I need you to look at me. Not like you're doing right now, but uh, really look at me. Look me right in the eyes and, uh, tell me how you, uh, feel about me again. Think you can do that for me? Huh?"
She stared into his eyes. What was he doing? Was he back on his kick of being so undeserving again? Hadn't they already gotten past that? Was he trying to push her away? Or, maybe he really was going to kill her this time. She wet her lips and cautiously placed her hands lightly on top of his. "I love you. You know that. Nothing's changed since you left this morning, Jack. I promise."
She watched his face turn from serious to full of laughter. Not just a small laugh either, but a bouncing, booming laugh. He pushed her hands off of his, taking his hands off her face. What the hell was he doing? The more she watched him shake with uncontrollable laughter, the angrier she got.
"I get it now. That's what all this is to you, then? You think this is all just the biggest fucking joke in the history of the world? You're fucking unbelievable, you know that, right?"
He shook his head, quieting his laughter. He ran a hand through his hair and bent down closer to her, his eyes no longer full of laughter, but anger. "No, no, no. You got it all wrong, sweetness. Not a, uh, not a fucking joke to me. To you, though. See, I got to hand it to you, though. You had me fooled and that's not an easy thing to do, sweetness. I thought I, uh, I thought I knew you."
She shook her head, frustrated as he moved away from her. "What…I have no idea what the hell you're talking about. You go out this morning and you come back a completely different person. I mean, Christ, Jack. You ask me to tell you how I feel about you and you just turn around and laugh like it's the funniest fucking joke you've ever heard. Then you tell me that I'm supposed to be the one that finds all of this to be a joke? I wasn't the one doubling over in laughter for fuck's sake. What the hell's the matter with you? You believed me this morning when I told you I loved you…"
His face was completely serious again, all traces of laughter gone. "Exactly. I did believe you earlier, and that's the joke, right sweetness?"
"Goddamnit, Jack! What the hell are you talking about?! You aren't making any sense to me. What joke?! Please, tell me what joke I've apparently told you that's so fucking funny to you."
He lowered his face to hers again. His lips almost touching hers and his eyes locked on hers. "Oh, you know. The one where you tell me you love me like the lying little bitch you are, Angel."
She winced at the pain in his words. He may as well have sucker punched her in the gut because it would have felt the same. She swallowed hard, struggling for air and composure. She knew the end was coming now. There'd be no fixing this, but she had to try. She had to try for her sake, no for his sake. She shook her head slowly and her voice came out in barely a whisper. "I…I never lied to you. I swear. Please. I…I don't understand. I never…"
He placed his hand over her mouth, squeezing her cheeks as tightly as he could without breaking her jaw. He glared down at her and caught the look of terror in her eyes. It was the deer caught in headlights look of absolute fear that he had longed to see on her face when they first met. This was the look he had wanted to see in order to kill her. Looking at it now, he only felt sick. She did this. She had to have known he wouldn't let her get away with it. Why would she be afraid now? He let go of her, shoving her away from him. He turned away from her, no longer able to look at her face.
"You know what you are, Angel? You're fucking pathetic."
She stared dumbfounded at his back as he moved to the window. She couldn't think of anything that would make him believe what she was saying. She couldn't think of any reason he would so drastically turn on her. She knew the chance was always there for him to snap and kill her just because of who he was, but she never imagined everything would end like this. Something had to trigger this. She had to have done something. She was so mad and confused that she could cry, but she didn't dare. Not now, not in front of him.
She silently slid off the bed and stood watching him as he stood motionless staring out the small window. She didn't dare move any closer to him or touch him, but she had to break the unbearable silence.
"Look, obviously I've done something wrong, but I don't know what that is. You have to tell me. You have to tell me what I've done so I can try to fix it."
He laughed as he turned around to face her, his eyes full of anger. "Fix it? Oh no, sweetness, there's no fixing this. See, the damage is already done. It's all here in black and white."
He reached inside his coat and pulled the newspaper out of his pocket and threw it at her. It landed on the floor in front of her bare feet. He watched as she bent to pick it up and saw the look of horror on her face. He smiled to himself watching as she was caught red handed in her lies now.
She looked down to find Eric's smiling face holding her. Her hands were shaking as she read the headline that she was positive she'd never see when the Joker took her. So this is what she'd done. She knew why he was mad now. She knew what this looked like and what it meant to him. Of course he'd be mad. This went against everything she had ever told him. "Oh my god…no."
"Didn't think I'd find that did you? See, now you know this can't be fixed. This, uh, this isn't like Back to the Future. I don't have a fucking time traveling DeLorean hiding downstairs and I, uh, I don't think you have one lying around either. Not that it would matter anyways, though. Your lies have already been spoken and going back in time wouldn't even fix any of this. We were always doomed, sweetness. Doomed from the very beginning to, uh, fall apart at the seams like this. Plus, if we could go back in time, well, I'd kill you like I should have back at the vault."
She blinked back the tears that so desperately wanted to come out. She believed him and she knew it probably would have been an easier ending than whatever ending awaited her now. She had known happiness for a short time, and she believed he had too. Now that would all die with her. No, she couldn't just give up now. She still had to try to get him to understand, to believe her. She couldn't just let herself die without at least trying to piece this back together.
"I…I know what this looks like and I promise you I'm just as shocked as you are. I don't know who's looking for me, Jack. Eric's dead. I really did kill him; you have to believe me on that. My family shut me out years ago. They wouldn't come looking for me. Jack, I…I swear to you I didn't think anybody would ever come looking for me. I never lied to you about anything. Everything I've said to you has been the truth. Oh god, Jack you have to believe me. Please."
He was laughing now. She sounded so weak, pathetic, and desperate to him. He was used to people begging him for mercy and this was no different. He hated that she was just like everyone else now. She was trying so hard to get him to believe her lies all over again. Didn't she get it? There was no going back now. It's over. It's all over.
He walked over to her and pulled out his knife. He grabbed her face in his hands and placed the knife at the corner of her mouth. He laughed slightly, glaring at her as he patted her cheek roughly with the hand that wasn't holding the knife to her mouth. His face was so close to hers.
"Oh, I believe, sweetness. I believe that you're so full of shit. I, uh, I may look like a fucking fool, but I can assure you I'm not. The only thing you're doing here is making things worse by continuing to lie to me. Do not fucking push me, Angel. You know how little effort it would take for me to kill you right now. You know how easy it would be for me. I can, uh; I can guarantee you that if you continue to fucking piss me off it won't be pretty. Got it? Hm?"
She felt the tears that she could no longer control escaping her eyes now. "Why prolong any of this then, huh? If you're going to kill me, then by all means do it now. Go ahead."
He erupted into booming laughter again, shaking her along with him. He put his knife back into his coat, smiling, and shook his head, quieting the laughter. "Oh come on, sweetness. Thought you knew me better than that. I'm a little disappointed, actually. You should know it would never be that easy with me. Think you can just fuck up and I'll just go ahead and kill you right away? No. That's too simple, Angel. That's not how I like to do things. I'm not going to kill you."
She felt more hot tears running down her cheeks as she smiled and let out a whimper of relief. He wasn't going to kill her; she had a chance to fix this if she was going to live. She reached out to touch him, but he quickly grabbed hold of her wrist, twisting it so hard she was sure it was broken, and spun her around. He pulled her into him from behind, her back pressed against his chest. She let out a scream of pain and felt one of his hands cup over her mouth, silencing her scream. His other arm was wrapped around her waist, still gripping her shattered wrist. She could feel his breath falling evenly on her neck.
"Don't be fucking stupid, Angeline. Just because I'm not going to kill you doesn't mean I don't want to. Just because you're not dead right now doesn't mean I'm just going to forget about all of this. What did you think I was going to do? Did you think I was just going to turn around and fuck you and we'd live happily ever after together? No. I don't think so. You, uh, you know as well as I do that, uh, there are no happy endings. Why should this be any different? Why should you get a happily ever after? Did you honestly think that's what we were going to have, princess? Hm?"
She swallowed hard, trying to find what little voice she could have as his hand moved away from her mouth and trailed to the back of her head. "Maybe not a happily ever after, but something as close to normal happiness as you and I could get."
He laughed slightly, his lips now brushing lightly against her ear, sending shivers down her spine. "That's funny. It really is, but, uh, you should have known better than that."
She turned her head slightly to look him in the eyes again. "If you aren't going to kill me, then what are you going to do?"
He laughed. "Well, I'm going fishing, sweetness."
"Fishing?"
"That's right. I'm, uh, I'm going Bat-fishing and you're the bait."
"What?"
She heard his booming laughter then she felt his arm leave her waist and his hand tightening and pushing against the back of her head. He was laughing maniacally as she felt the top half of her body being pushed forward by him. The last thing she saw before everything went black was the cracked off-white wall her head was being slammed into at full speed.
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- AUTHORS NOTE -
- Sorry it took so long to get this one out, but I hope it was worth it! Only about 2 more chapters to go! Hope you enjoyed and hope you're all still with me. Thanks as always for reading.