Disclaimer: I do not own Total Drama or any of its related seasons. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. The alphabet theme isn't mine and is property of Frank15. The 52 OC's in this story however are mine so do not steal them.
The Warning: This chapter contains soda chugging, a short person being thrown, disturbing video game references, shout outs, honey, bad smells, Nakia covered in bee stings, some racism (which is a bad thing) and emotional moments. You have been warned!
Note: Something bad happened to me today; another of our chickens died. You may remember during TDL my pet chicken Korma died … this time an equally lovely chicken named Dotty as one to exit the mortal coil we call life. May she rest in peace. Do not squander the time you share with your pets … you won't realize how much you will miss them until they are gone. Because of this, day 7 will be dedicated in loving memory of Dotty.
Let's be a busy bee!
Dedicated to Dotty. 2010-2012
It was daytime on Wawanakwa Island; it was a rather pleasant morning … or as pleasant as Wawanakwa could be, which was actually quite a lot since Chris Maclean was no longer there and, let's face it, he's a dick; there is no denying that fact. Spider and Quana stood together on the dock of shame as the camera began rolling.
"Last time on Total Drama Letterama we tested our twenty two campers on their artistic ability through the use of painting." Began Spider. "It wasn't such a hard challenge as everybody is able to be creative … well, maybe not Helen, but the vast majority of people can be."
"I think the challenge went pretty well, each team managed to make a painting to be judged. But other interesting things happened such as Paul and VayVay forming a solid friendship, Winnie and Yannis bonding, Donny showing a surprising talent at art and leadership … and Fripp being Fripp." Continued Quana.
"Yeah, his drawing wasn't very good and he called Donny something like a 'big stupid doo-doo head' … honestly; is that his best insult?" Blinked Spider. "Regardless; Kim saw Fripp was upset and manipulated him into screwing over his own team by throwing away their original painting and replacing it with his. I kinda feel bad for Fripp really; Donny sure throttled him."
"It's made worse by the fact Donny is really good at boxing." Agreed Quana. "Still, Fripp kinda blew his own chances; then again, he probably wouldn't have done that if Kim hadn't manipulated him."
"Kim brings to mind a sort of a cross between Tabitha and Kasimar … it's almost disturbing." Gulped Spider. "But she hasn't really broken any rules … but seriously, some of the stuff she's saying in the confessionals is going to have to be censored in the American edition … except when it airs in Texas."
"Texas allows anything." Giggled Quana. "Well; in the end Team Savannah came in first place for the first time, Team, Mongolia once again avoided elimination by coming second … which left Team Everest as the losing team."
"It was probably pretty obvious, but they voted out Fripp. I think everyone saw that coming; well, with Fripp gone I think the average IQ on the island has gone up … was that a bad thing to say?" Asked Spider uncertainly.
"Don't worry about it, it was a harmless joke." Assured Quana. "I'm hoping today's challenge will go as planned … it is a little bit dangerous."
"As long as they wear the protective gear then they should be fine; I gotta say, Yessica was a genius for thinking this challenge up." Smiled Spider.
"Indeed; so, what's going to happen in this episode? Will any new friendships arise? Will anyone get injured … hopefully not. Will Team Mongolia's winning streak end? And who will be the sixth person voted off?" Listed Quana.
"Find out right now on Total Drama Letterama!" Finished Spider.
(Theme song, I Wanna Be Famous)
Xyly was finishing off her morning jog; she exercised regularly to keep herself strong not only so she would remain in good physical condition but also just for fun, working up a sweat and feeling the adrenalin running was a good reminder of her Viking ancestry, something she was quite proud of.
"Xyly wonders what today's challenge will be; hopefully it'll be another physical challenge, Xyly is good at those." Said Xyly hopefully.
As Xyly slowed from her log into a leisurely walking pace she noticed Donny standing nearby doing pull ups on a very low hanging tree branch.
"Morning Donny!" Waved Xyly as she walked up.
"Huh? Oh, hey Xyly." Said Donny while he continued to do pull ups.
"Why are you doing pull ups from such a low branch? You'd be better off doing them up higher; the risk of falling would make you work harder." Stated Xyly.
Donny dropped to the ground and mumbled something that Xyly couldn't hear.
"Could you repeat that? Xyly didn't hear you." Requested Xyly.
"… I'm too short to reach the upper branches." Admitted Donny. "It's because I suffer from Dwarfism; you do know what it's like not even being Able to reach the cookie jar?"
"Err … is it anything like not being tall enough to go on a roller coaster?" Asked Xyly.
"Exactly." Muttered Donny bitterly.
"Can't you outgrow the condition?" Asked Xyly.
Donny glared at Xyly and the Viking quickly realized her mistake
"Err … no pun intended." Added Xyly quickly.
"Sadly no; I'm going to be a short shit forever! Seriously, if I ever had children they'd be taller than me by the time they were six! Gaaaah!" Fumed Donny before taking a few deep breaths. "I've also got quite a high blood pressure, I have a nuclear temper."
"Xyly noticed." Nodded Xyly. "Say; would you like me to get you to a higher branch?"
"… Sure; if you can." Shrugged Donny.
"Ok!" Declared Xyly as she picked Donny up by the back of his t-shirt.
"Hey! What are you doing?" Asked Donny in alarm.
"Aiming." Replied Xyly as she reared back the arm holding Donny.
"Wait, I changed my mind - Aaaaargh!" Wailed Donny as Xyly threw him up into the tree with relative ease.
"Enjoy your pull ups." Smiled Xyly as she took off jogging towards camp.
Donny clung to a branch about seven meters off the ground and gulped.
Confessional: My dad once told me about a sport called 'midget tossing'; I bet Donny wouldn't like it.
Xyly: Xyly thinks Donny appreciates her help.
Donny: I was up in that tree for an hour before I was able to get down! Seven meters may not seem much to most people, but to me it's a giant cliff! Well, Xyly meant well so I can't be too angry I guess.
Tyson was sitting in the mess hall strumming on 'Sharon'; he was currently the only person in the mess hall (though Gary and Raven were in the kitchen) and was eagerly awaiting the next challenge. He felt that his team could pull of a second consecutive victory which would definitely boost the overall morale of the team. He had two unopened soda cans next to him and stretched out.
"Nothing much to do besides wait for the challenge; I wonder what I could do to entertain myself." Pondered Tyson. "I hope the challenge is a talent show, that'd be totally awesome."
The doors to the mess hall opened and Cherry speedily walked in; even her walking pace was rather fast. She spotted Tyson and sat down across from him.
"Hey Tyson; how you doing?" Asked Cherry as she bounced on her seat.
"I'm fine, just fine." Smiled Tyson. "How about you Cherry?"
"I'm feeling awesome, but I have a need for speed. I hope today's challenge will be a race of some kind. If it's a cart race I bet I'll win without much difficulty, cars are awesome, especially a Zonda or a souped up Ferrari."
"Cars are cool, but rocking out on stage is even better. The cheering crowd, the extremely loud noises, the complaining neighbors … awesome." Grinned Tyson as he stopped strumming on Sharon. "By the way; there's something I'd like to ask of you."
"Ask away; if it's a question about cars I can answer anything." Said Cherry confidently with a gleam in her eyes.
"I was wondering if you'd like to have a chugging contest." Challenged Tyson while gesturing to the two soda cans. "I saw you chugging maple syrup against Opal a few days ago … care to see if you can beat me?"
"Sure; I love a challenge." Nodded Cherry as she quickly grabbed one of the unopened soda cans while Tyson took hold of the other.
The two teens simultaneously opened the cans and prepared to chug.
"Just so you know, I've been drinking from the garden hose since I was three, so I've got the winning edge." Teased Cherry.
"We'll see dudette … we'll see." Said Tyson confidently. "One the count of three we'll chug; one … two … three!"
The cool rocker and the genki racer began chugging at a rapid pace; just two and a half seconds later Cherry slammed her empty soda can down with Tyson finishing two seconds after her.
"Victory!" Cheered Cherry while pumping her arms and shaking her hair around.
"Superior chugger, I salute you; that was totally awesome." Said Tyson while sounding very impressed. "Where did you learn to chug like that?"
"A future race car driver has to know these things." Smiled Cherry.
"… I don't see the logic in that but I totally understand." Said Tyson half logically. "So … I've got more soda; care for the best three out of five?"
"You're on!" Cackled Cherry giddily.
Confessional: Feel the sugar rush!
Tyson: Cherry kept on winning; man … that girl is cool.
Cherry: The speed of my soda chugging is as fast as five miles per hour over the speed of light!
Zed, Paul and Yannis were sitting on the steps of the Champion Cabin; they were talking about the contest so far and what they thought of it.
"It must be nice to be on a team that hasn't even lost once." Said Paul while Yannis nodded in agreement with his friend's question.
"It's alright partners; but I don't think Alice and Bishop like me that much, I reckon it's because I'm a farmer. Still; I bet they're nice people once ya get ta know them." Stated Zed. "By the way; how's it going now that Quarla's been gone?"
"It's quite a relief; she was as bad as an unwipable stain or a very, very dirty germ. It's all thanks to VayVay; she sure picked a good time to arrive on the island." Said Paul is relief.
Yannis nodded in agreement and frowned at the thought of the bully.
"It kinda reminds of how Nakia treated Spider last season." Noted Zed. "Nakia sure what a heckuvva scary girl at times."
"Indeed." Agreed Paul.
The door of the champion's cabin opened and Winnie stepped out attaching her cat tail belt.
"Good morning guys." Said Winnie cheerfully. "It's such a sunny day isn't it? Cornflake loves this kind of weather."
"Who's cornflake?" Blinked Zed.
"One of my kitties; I've only been gone a few days and I really miss them." Said Winnie while thinking about her cats that she loved very much. "When I win I'll take them out for some sushi, its Emerald's favorite."
"How many kitties do you own?" Asked Zed curiously.
"Five." Said Winnie sunnily. "Who knows; maybe they'll have kittens one day; what can I say, I just adore kitties! Heehee! See you guys at breakfast! Goodbye everyone who isn't Yannis, and a special goodbye to everyone else!"
Winnie cheerfully skipped off towards the mess hall while Yannis smiled to himself as a small blush appeared on his face.
Confessional: What would the chipping name be? Winnis? Yannie? None of those sound quite right.
Winnie: I don't know why I said that; but it's always fun to tease my friends a little. And Yannis is pretty much my best friend here.
Yannis: (He rubs his left arm nervously and smiles).
"I may not be much of an expert on interaction or girls … but I think Winnie might like ya Yannis." Noted Zed.
Yannis looked at Zed as though to say 'seriously'.
"I am being serious if that's what that expression means." Nodded Zed. "She likes you more than the chickens back home like corn … that means a lot."
Yannis blushed at the thought of Winnie liking him.
"Good luck getting kissed by her … I'm not one for that kind of thing, kissing spreads germs!"" Gagged Paul as he sprayed some air freshener.
Yannis silently laughed and made a few gestures to Paul.
"No Yannis, I don't like anyone here in that way; I bet you five bucks I won't have a crush on anyone throughout my time here." Gambled Paul.
Yannis nodded and the two team mates shook hands to seal the bet.
"Why would you make bets on love? It's something to be cherished and enjoyed, not something to be afraid of." Stated Zed.
"… How come you're so knowledgeable?" Asked Paul curiously.
"I'm like Dylan from The Magic Roundabout; I can come up with intelligent things in certain situations." Shrugged Zed.
"You watch The Magic Roundabout?" Chuckled Paul.
"Who doesn't? It's popular." Stated Zed.
Confessional: As popular as Earthbound was in the US … not very, it was a big seller in Japan though!
Zed: By popular I mean that me, my ma, my pop and my siblings like it.
Paul: Zed seriously needs to get cable. (Zed notices a spider descending from the ceiling). Ah! Germy bug! (Paul runs out of the confessional).
Yannis: (He holds up a sign which says 'spiders are not bugs, they are arachnids').
Alice was sitting against a tree thinking; she was thinking about how she was going to get rid of Bishop, Zed and Opal since she didn't like them. When I say 'she didn't like them' I'm not implying Alice likes anyone, just that she hates those three more than anyone else.
"I wonder how I can make those idiots look bad enough to get them voted off; … maybe I could pretend to cry or possibly guilt people into voting with me; it's worked plenty of times before." Mused Alice in thought.
"Hi Alice!" Said Opal cheerfully as she skipped up.
"What do you want?" Sighed Alice in annoyance.
"I wanted to tell you a joke." Smiled Opal.
"I don't want to hear it." Scowled Alice.
"How did the sea get high?" Asked Opal.
"… With baited breath I await an answer." Said Alice dryly.
"It smoked some seaweed! Hahahahahaha!" Laughed Opal crazily.
"That joke sucked; just go away and flash your undergarments to Zed or something." Shot Alice as she got up to walk away.
"Oh, I'm not wearing any panties." Said Opal casually with a smile.
Alice blinked and sighed.
"Go and put some on you freak!" Screamed Alice in anger as she stormed off.
"I'm not a freak." Said Opal softly before switching back to her hyper attitude. "Ok; see you later A!"
Confessional: Freak rhymes with Greek!
Alice: Opal is a danger to normal people; how many mental disorders does she have? I pity the asylum she lives in!
Opal: It doesn't matter if one or a few or everyone at school calls me a freak, all that matters is that I like who I am … and I like myself just as much as a tasty bola de neu at Christmas!
Sasha was playing on her DS while leaning against the communal washrooms. She was playing Mario Kart and was having quite a good time of doing so. She was currently trying to beat her fastest lap time on Rainbow Road which is known as one of the hardest tracks in the game if not the hardest … but for a gaming expert like Sasha it was simply but another track.
"Bower's speed would have been useful here … but he's got such bad cornering that it wouldn't be worth it." Said Sasha to herself; self narration was something that she was rather prone to.
"What game are you playing Sasha?" Asked Eddie as he walked up.
"Mario Kart DS." Replied Sasha. "It's quite a good game and I like that each character has three unique karts they can use … but I think Mario Kart Wii is the best in the series … unfortunately the wii isn't very portable and I doubt there would be a plughole for it on the island."
"True; this is kind of an outdoor experience." Agreed Eddie. "Nevertheless; you could always play on the games in the games room the next time we win."
"If we win again; victory is a very subjective term, it's all about luck and the variables of the challenges." Stated Sasha. "Too bad none of us are muscle men like Oscar … then again; I prefer trim and brainy guys."
"Are you flirting with me?" Asked Eddie with a little amusement.
"If that's how you want to interpret it; I was really just stating an opinion of mine." Replied Sasha as she finished the race and pocketed her DS. "So; what's the torture for today?"
"I'm not sure yet; but there was a fair bit of honey in the mess hall that we could optionally put on our toast, from that I deduce we will either have a cooking challenge or something to do with bees." Stated Eddie.
"I hope it isn't bees; the first time I encountered bees in animal crossing I screamed so loud my parents thought I was having a heart attack." Said Sasha while blushing in embarrassment at the memory.
"Was it that scary?" Asked Eddie in concern.
"Some people say video games can cause trauma; it's actually quite rare that a game can be that horrifying. Usually it's only in 18 rated games … and occasionally kids games." Said Sasha with a look of discomfort.
"What do you mean?" Asked Eddie.
"… Have you ever heard of a game called Earthbound?" Asked Sasha.
"… It rings a bell but I don't remember it." Said Eddie while shaking his head.
"It's an RPG for the SNES; it's the game that Ness from Brawl appeared it." Explained Sasha. "It is known for having a profoundly disturbing final boss … Giygas."
"Isn't that your worst fear?" Asked Eddie.
"Yes; Giygas is … messed up. He, well, 'it', has it all. Creepy battle theme, disturbing appearance … and it talks like a freaking mental patient. Giygas was actually based on a childhood trauma of Shigesato Itoi, when he though he witnessed a rape scene; and to add extra insult to injury, in Giygas's final form the silhouette of an unborn baby appears in him. It is said to be a coincidence … but I doubt it. Seriously; after first seeing Giygas I slept with a night light for two weeks."
Sasha looked a little shaky after explaining that; Eddie gently put a hand on her left shoulder.
"Don't worry Sasha; Giygas is not real, and you are, he won't be able to hurt you." Promised Eddie with a warm smile.
"… Thanks Eddie." Smiled Sasha shyly.
Confessional: Hands up if you've played Earthbound … or Mother 3. Or both!
Sasha: It's really nice to have somebody nice to talk to about your individual problems and worries; it'd feel silly talking to mum and dad about a monster in a retro video game.
Eddie: I wonder if minesweeper counts as a video game. And I have to wonder; how many games has Sasha played in her lifetime? Seriously; some of her favorites are games I haven't eve heard of.
Kim: What the #bleep#? Why does that Nigger keep getting close to Eddie? I need him as a ally and she's lousing it up! Well; nothing a little false love, emotional manipulation and possibly blackmail can't solve … the problem is that I don't have anything I can blackmail them with.
Bishop: I don't think that Kim likes Sasha much; that's fine by me as I don't like her much either … still, I'd rather pick a verbal fight with Alice since getting her angry is a lot more satisfying and fun.
Jill sighed as she sat on the ground outside the Loser Cabin; once again she had put up with Nina's bad body odor … in fact, Nina smelled even worse everyday, and trust me, that is really saying something.
"I can't take much more of this; my nose feels so sore." Mumbled Jill while sitting cross legged.
"Salutations Jill; you look as unhappy as a Paladin who did something bad and lost his paladin powers forever and was thus forced to be a fighter." Noted Max as he walked up.
Jill raised an eyebrow at Max's statement.
"What I mean is what's up? You look sad." Simplified Max.
"Quite simply my nose is dying; Nina is refusing to bathe and she ahs admitted it's been over a year since she last took a bath. She doesn't go anywhere near anything that could be used to make her smell better, only things that make her smell worse." Explained Jill. "Seriously, she rolls in mud at least four times a day and dunks her head in the toilet just as many times!"
"She sounds like she smells worse than the food a Black Dragon eats." Noted Max before adding. "Black Dragons eat carrion … carrion means rotting flesh."
"Ew." Flinched Jill. "So; do you have any suggestions on getting rid of the smell?"
"You could cast a Holy Spell." Joked Max.
Jill was stony faced.
"…Alternatively you could hang some pine scented fresheners around the room; that way Nina won't even come in. Harsh … but effective nonetheless." Suggested Max. "I'll get the fresheners off Paul if you want."
"… Thank you very much Max; I appreciate your assistance." Smiled Jill sweetly. "I seriously owe you one."
"It's funny you should mention that because I have something I'd like to ask." Began Max.
"If it's to ask for my bra like Cody did to Gwen you can forget it." Said Jill snarkerly but playfully.
"Actually; I was hoping you would join me and the guys for a game of dungeons and dragons tomorrow." Explained Max. "I think you'll like it."
"Why did I have to say I owed you one?" Sighed Jill in amusement before nodding. "Ok Max; I'll play this dungeons and demons game with you."
"Dungeons and dragons." Corrected Max.
"Whatever; sure, I'll give it a go … but don't expect me to become addicted." Stated Jill.
"Wasn't going to." Replied Max.
Confessional: Dungeons and Dragons … when you play this you know you are a nerd!
Max: Awesome! I'll get to play D&D with a girl! … That's a first. Girls at school don't really say much to me besides 'Scram Loser'.
Jill: Sometimes I'm just too generous; hopefully it'll be fun, but I'm not really too sure.
VayVay: When I was a little girl I always wanted to meet a dragon; they are apparently as intelligent as a genetically altered brain of mind flowers and all that doo dah.
Tabitha was sitting with her knees drawn up on the beach looking depressed and thinking about something. Rheneas was standing a distance away watching her and wondering how he was going to approach her.
Confessional: Rhenabitha? Is that a good shipping name?
Rheneas: I may look like a real and a tough street smart guy … but when it comes to girls I really don't know that much. I guess I'll just wing it. Tabitha sure looks upset, I wonder what's troubling her.
Tabitha let out a sad sigh as she thought about what would happen when she returned home to her family's mansion. A home was supposed to be somewhere you could feel safe … for Tabitha that wasn't exactly the case…
"I wonder how bad it will be this time." Mumbled Tabitha slightly shakily.
"Hey Tabitha, how's it going?" Asked Rheneas as he walked up.
"Eep!" Jumped Tabitha before seeing who it was. "Oh, it just you Rheneas."
"Were you expecting someone else?" Asked Rheneas.
"Not really, its just that pretty much everyone hates me so I have to be on alert in case they try and attack me." Explained Tabitha with a fearful expression.
"I don't hate you." Stated Rheneas.
"I don't see why." Mumbled Tabitha. "What I did last season was horrible; to be honest I deserve all the hatred I'm getting."
"That's not to say you cannot make things right." Smiled Rheneas as he sat down next to Tabitha. "A truthful apology goes a long way."
"I tried that with Uzuri yesterday … she … didn't except it." Said Tabitha while thinking back to yesterday.
"Yeah … I heard you crying in the confessional; I never really took you as the kind to cry. You seemed so emotionally strong, calm and collected last season, very sure of yourself."
"Well, that was before…" Tabitha trailed off as though she had stopped herself from saying something.
"Something on your mind?" Asked Rheneas gently. "Anything I can do to help?"
"Rheneas; listen … I appreciate that you don't hate me and that you want to help me out … but I'm not worth the effort, I don't want people hating you because of a terrible smear on society like me." Said Tabitha as tears began to appear in her eyes. "You can have much better friends than me; and after last season there probably isn't a single person who doesn't want me dead, trust me, I know."
Tabitha got to her feet and quickly left while looking like she was close to tears. Rheneas sat in silence for a few moments and gained a worried expression.
"Something is troubling Tabitha and it's not anything good … what has caused her to be like this?" Asked Rheneas out loud. "Poor girl; if I could help her I would do so in a heartbeat."
Confessional: What's troubling Tabitha?
Rheneas: Tabitha wasn't like this last season … something big and bad must have happened between seasons. I wonder how I can help her … maybe I should give her some space for now; but if Kasimar tries to harass her I'll break him like that cabinet I tripped into.
Tabitha: (She seems to be crying into her hands). I wish *sob* I was dead…
A while later the twenty one campers were in the mess hall conversing with their team mates. Breakfast was just about over and soon it would be time for the challenge.
"What do you guys think the challenge will be today?" Asked Ulric while drinking some orange juice. "I'm hoping for something else to do with art; we did pretty good yesterday."
"First place is always good, and my always I pretty much mean one time." Giggled VayVay while juggling a few spoons.
"Hey VayVay?" Asked Paul.
"You rang me on the telephone." Said VayVay to show she was listening.
"Where did you learn to juggle? Inquired Paul.
"Oh; my Auntie Ker taught me how; she's was a clown you see." Explained VayVay. "And she always told the funniest stories like the one about the car that enjoyed French Vanilla flavored gasoline."
"… Now I see where you get it." Chuckled Ulric.
"You mean my loopy personality? Life is like a pineapple upside down cake, it wouldn't make any sense if it was the right way up." Pointed out VayVay logically.
Confessional: Does that count as Insane Troll Logic?
Winnie: VayVay is funny!
Ulric: VayVay is very interesting; part of me wonders if what she's saying is an act or not. Either way I feel that we're lucky to have her on the team.
VayVay: I wonder is there are any words that rhyme with drumsticks; they are like the swords of the music world.
"So; we've voted off both Fripp and Lankston, they were kinda useless anyway so it's no big deal. Still; we're at a disadvantage." Stated Jill.
"Jill's right; we've got the fewest members of all the teams. If not for Team Savannah getting two additional members we'd be in less of a pickle." Agreed Imanda. "But I might get my 'become an underdog' badge thanks to this."
"Is there a badge for rolling in mud?" Asked Nina. "I could help you get that one if you like."
"No thank you; I'd rather not get dirty unless it's necessary, like for a challenge." Denied Imanda politely.
"Suit yourself." Shrugged Nina as she sniffed her armpit. "Boy; my pits sure are getting hairy and smelly."
"I don't suppose you use deodorant." Asked Donny dryly.
"Nope!" Laughed Nina.
"… That is not surprising in the least." Stated Donny. "You smelly worse than the dead rat the janitor found in the schools septic tank."
"I won't ask." Gagged Rheneas.
"Me neither." Agreed Max.
"So … any idea on what the challenge will be?"! Asked Rheneas. "Personally I hope it involves fire … but since we've already had a fire challenge I doubt that will be the case."
"If it's a boxing challenge then I'm game." Said Donny while pounding his fists together.
"You're funny." Giggled Nina. "Oh, hang on."
Nina let out a loud fart which made her team mates gag.
Confessional: I hope for a challenge where people will confess in me!
Nina: I wonder if the challenge involves skunks; I'd love to get sprayed by one!
Donny: Ok; I am so voting for Nina if we lose.
Jill: … Now do you see what I've got to put up with at night?
Imanda: Nina officially earns the 'let out a loud antisocial fart' badge.
"I find Raven's cooking to be of an inadequate standard." Stated Bishop as he swallowed his fried eggs. "Then again; I would expect nothing more from a poor person."
"I wouldn't recommend saying that; Gary might hear you, and we know that he is protective of Raven." Cautioned Eddie.
"… Point taken." Said Bishop. "Still; I do not fear Gary, only the pain he would dish out."
"I bet being beaten up by a so called 'poor person' would be pretty humiliating." Giggled Cherry.
"Shut it." Growled Bishop.
"She's right though, and besides, you're a pretty unlikable person." Sneered Alice.
"Rather be unlikable than as hatable as Jasper Batt Jr." Replied Bishop.
Sasha looked wide eyed.
"Oh man, he did not just say that." Eeped Sasha. "Jasper Batt Jr is the most hatable character in video gaming."
"Video games are pointless and stupid; that insult means little to me." Stated Alice.
"That makes it one of the only things that doesn't set you off." Chuckled Bishop.
"Good one Bishop." Smiled Kim.
"No problem m'lady." Replied Bishop politely.
"I didn't really understand the insult." Said Zed as he scratched his head.
"Don't worry; you'll learn." Said Opal from her seat next to Bishop while balancing a spoon on her nose. "Wheeee! I'm a walrus!"
Confessional: The game is called No More Heroes … but technically Travis is a hero ... sorta.
Kim: My team is full of brain dead cripples … at least we don't have any fags or gypsies on the team.
Bishop: Any day now Alice is going to explode; after she's voted off I'll win the hearts and minds of these pathetic saps. If I got a dollar for every time I was awesome I'd be even richer than the stupid Queen on England.
Cherry: Bishop is such a Grumpy Gus!
"Good morning everyone; are you ready for your next challenge?" Asked Spider as he and Quana walked into the Mess Hall.
"I'm so ready that I'd be ready even if I wasn't ready!" Declared Opal.
"I'd be ready even if that made sense." Giggled Sasha.
"Glad to hear it; today's challenge is going to be potentially dangerous … but you'll be fine as long as she wear the protective gear." Assured Quana. "Let's get to it everyone!"
Everyone followed Spider and Quana out of the mess to their next challenge; everyone was wondering what it would be and were also hoping it wouldn't be as bad as Chris's dangerous challenges.
Confessional: Chris is a dick!
Eddie: Now we're going to see if my hunch for this challenge was right.
The campers stared at the challenge set up that was standing a safe distance away; several bee hives (the white box ones you'd possibly find in a farm orchard) were set up in 10 columns of ten. Three tables were set up; each had the logo of one of the team on a flag as well as a large number of empty jars.
"Well guys; what do you think?" Asked Spider.
"… There are so many bee puns I could make, but I will refrain from making them and spare you the groaning." Stated Cherry.
"I wouldn't have minded hearing them dudette." Smiled Tyson.
"Ok, first of all … are any of you allergic to bee stings?" Asked Spider.
Everyone was silent since nobody had an allergy to the stings.
"Good; it's unlikely that you will get stung, but it is just a precaution." Explained Spider. "Now; today's challenge was thought up by last season's competitor Yessica. You will be wearing protective bee keeping suits and harvesting honey from the bee hives. You will then fill the empty jars with the honey. Whichever team fills the most jars when time is up will be the winners. Any questions?"
"Err, yeah. Is this challenge safe?" Asked Kim nervously.
"It will be as long as you don't take off your protective gear," Assured Quana before flinching. "Nakia took off her head gear because it was 'bad for her hair' or something even though she's still bald … you can probably guess what happened."
"She deserves whatever she got, after last season I think a load of be stings is exactly what her karma owes her." Said Ulric with a smirk.
Confessional: Black and yellow or yellow and black?
Ulric: Who would be stupid enough to take off protective gear when in the middle of a swarm of friggin bees … Obviously Nakia is.
Nakia lay in agony on a bed in the medical tent covered in bee stings and looking not only in pain but also murderous.
"One of these days I am going to kill Spider." Snarled Nakia as Chef applied some lotion to her stings.
"Yeah, whatever. You said that last season and we all saw how that ended up. You lost all of your hair." Smirked Chef Hatchet.
"Shut up!" Whined Nakia before wailing. "Owwwwwwwwwwww!"
Confessional: Buzz, buzz, buzz!
Chef: Bee stings ain't so bad; pain doesn't hurt that much.
"Anyway; you all know the rules so let's get this challenge started." Said Quana with a clap of her hands. "Before we begin you'll need to get suited up in the correct equipment. Lavender will help get you your individual suits."
"Follow me everyone." Said Lavender as she walked up and gestured for the campers to follow her.
"So that's why they asked for our measurements." Muttered Donny.
As the twenty one campers left to get suited up Spider and Quana looked at each other.
"I wonder how this challenge will end up; I sure hope nobody gets stung." Said Quana.
"If they don't take off their suits they'll be fine my Hispanic Beauty." Assured Spider while giving Quana a peck on the cheek which made her blush. "I wonder how much honey we'll get."
"I don't know; buy you are far sweeter than any amount of it." Flirted Quana. "So; who will buzz and who will be fuzz? Will anybody get stung? Will we hear any bee jokes? And who will be the sixth person voted off? Find out when we return to Total Drama Letterama!"
I'm really surprised that nobody else thought of bee keeping as a challenge; it just seems perfect for a Total Drama challenge. If Gareth from Tween Tour were hear this would be easy for him as he could control the bees … but how will our twenty one campers fair? Hopefully not too badly because they don't want to end up like Nakia! Stay tuned!