This is almost the most fun I've ever had, so why do I feel like this? All mixed up and sick inside. And I haven't eaten the baby keeches or anything that they're going to have at the reception later.

I like hanging out with Daddy and his girlfriend Heather. She has a convertible and she's very pretty. Yes, Mom is pretty, too, but like a mom. And Heather is nice to me. I mean, Mom is super nice but moms are supposed to be nice.

Dad always thinks of fun stuff for us to do, like going to the beach or Disneyland. (I went to Disney World when I was three, but I don't really remember it.) I've always liked when he visits, although he's very busy making doctor-mentaries, so he can't visit as much as I want. He asked me yesterday if I'd like us to spend more time together, so of course I said yes. I was afraid when I first heard that he was getting married that I would see him even less. Like what if Heather was a wicked stepmother who hated kids?

But then Dad asked if I would like to live with him and Heather. I said, "But I live with Mom, Tony, Sam, Grandma, Grover, and Iggy."

"I know, Little Tiger, but I mean some of the time. Like a few months a year in each place. Wouldn't that be fun?"

I don't know if it would be fun. I mean, it would be fun to go on the airplane, even if I throw up again. And I would like to see him more. But live with him? All my stuff, like my books and my iguana, are in Connecticut. I could maybe take some books on the plane, but not Iggy.

And I would miss Mommy, Tony, Sam, Grandma, and Grover. Yes, I miss Daddy sometimes, but I'm used to missing him.

"What about everyone in Connecticut?" I asked Daddy.

"Well, they're going to be pretty busy with the new baby soon, Sport."

I hadn't thought of that. I mean, I know babies take a lot of work. I remember when my friend David's sister was a baby, and Tony helped take care of her. But he still had time for me. Maybe it's different when the baby lives in your house.

"Yeah, I guess so. Are you and Heather going to have a baby?"

He seemed surprised by my question. "Uh, not for awhile. Besides, we'll have you, and you're all the kid we need."

Back home, I'm one of two kids, but it'll be three soon. I wonder if Sam will feel like they don't have time for her, or if she won't care because she's older and a girl.

Daddy and I talked after the bachelor party, when he tucked me in. I think everyone had fun at the party. I got a movie about stags and everything. Tony helped me.

Tony is more like a dad than Heather is like a mom, but he's older than Heather and he has taken care of me for a very long time, even before he married Mom. Also, he was a dad before I was born because of Sam. And he just understands kids. He knows how we think, and he can act like a big kid, but he can also be wise or tough like a dad when he has to be. And he is the best cook ever. Dad and Heather can't cook, but Dad says we could eat out a lot. I like restaurants when it's a special occasion but there aren't extra forks. I don't know if I'd want to eat in them all the time though. Mom can cook some, not fancy stuff, but things Sam and I like to eat. I guess the baby will eat stuff out of jars, because that's what they do on TV.

(My friend Steven says moms can feed babies with their boobies, but I don't see how that would work. I think he made that up.)

Tony has talked to me about all the best-man stuff I have to do. I wouldn't be able to do this without him. I mean, I guess I could've asked my dad, but he probably figured I should just know. Plus, he's the groom, and he has his own stuff to worry about. Anyway, it's helped to talk to Tony but I'm still nervous.

And now the wedding is about to start. I'm wearing a tucks. Mom says I look very grown-up and handsome. I feel silly, but it's what you wear at a wedding, if you're part of it I mean, not just watching it like Mom, Tony, Sam, and Grandma. (Grover and Iggy are staying with the Witteners.) Sam is wearing Mom's shawl over her sleeveless dress because she has a bad sunburn. I ran around in the sun, but I didn't lie down on the sand like a piece of bacon. Girls are so weird sometimes, even tomboys like Sam.

I would miss her, too, though. Sometimes she gets annoyed with me, like a real sister, but we also have lots of fun together. And she beats up older kids who beat me up. Not too often, because Tony and especially Mom don't like her to fight, but just enough to be a warning.

I wonder if she knows I might go live with Dad. I haven't really had a chance to talk to her.

But I did talk to Grandma this morning. She let me have some of her strawberry yogurt when she had breakfast in bed, because she was out late, like usual. I told her everything I was feeling. I couldn't tell Mom or Tony because they might feel bad that they want me to leave because of the baby.

Grandma didn't say much, just listened. Then at the end she said, "Jonathan, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do."

"But, Grandma, I don't know what I want to do."

"I think when the right moment comes, you'll know." Sometimes she can be mysterious like that, although usually she says exactly what she thinks, even if Mom and Tony don't want her to.

I thanked her for listening and for the yogurt. I never had it before. It's supposed to be good for you, even though it has lots of bacteria. I'd already eaten at the breakfast buffet downstairs with everybody else, but yogurt doesn't fill you up. People eat it when they're on diets.

Then Grandma said she would buy me some frozen yogurt. I don't think they have it in Connecticut yet, but they have it in California and maybe New York. It's not as healthy as regular yogurt but it's healthier than ice cream. She took me to a "frogurt" store a couple blocks from the hotel to get mint mango. She said there was time before the wedding and there was, but I had to change into my tucks as soon as I got back.

I wonder if I shouldn't have had so much yogurt. Maybe that's why I feel sick, and not because of all the things I have to think about.

Daddy looks at me and says, "Well, Little Tiger, ready to stand up for me?"

That doesn't mean really standing, and it's not like "stand-up comics." It means that I'm here to be my dad's best man, like a best friend. "Daddy, I'm feeling really scared and nervous."

"You're a Bower, Son, and Bowers don't get scared."

I've seen Mom get scared, but maybe it's different if you're a lady and not born a Bower. "But my stomach hurts, too."

"Come on, Jonathan, this is my big day and I'm counting on you."
"I'm sorry, Dad." I will do my best to be the best best man I can. I will hand him the ring at the right moment and try not to think about how I feel.

The wedding march starts. Sam told me that usually the bride walks down the aisle with her father, but Heather's father is dead. Dad and Heather are going to walk down together, and then I'll go after them. She comes over and she looks even prettier in her white dress. She smiles at me. I will try to do a good job for her, too.

They walk over to the minister and then I wait a moment and follow them. I try not to think about my stomach or anything else but the wedding. But by the time I get over to them, I feel like I'm going to throw up. I try to tell Daddy, but he says, "Not now, Jonathan. After the wedding."

I don't think I can wait that long. Suddenly I feel all the yogurt coming up. I try to keep my mouth shut but I can't. And then it all comes out, onto Heather's shoes!

Heather screams and everyone at the wedding is surprised. I feel bad, I mean my feelings, too, but mostly I want to lie down and have Mommy stroke my hair and give me ginger ale.

"Angela, do something!" Daddy yells.

Then Mommy is there next to me, and she leads me away. She takes me back to our hotel sweet. She says, "It's going to be OK, Darling," and part of me feels like it can't be because I ruined Daddy's wedding, and part of me feels like it will because she's here for me, like she always is.

But what will happen when I have to live with Daddy instead of her sometimes? Maybe he'll be mad at me, and maybe Heather will hate me now. Mommy and Tony always love me and they hardly ever get mad at me. Or at least that's what I thought until I found out about them sending me away.

Mommy has me lie down with a damp washcloth on my forehead and she orders ginger ale from room service. She strokes my hair while we wait. I want to ask her if I can stay with her and Tony in Connecticut, but I know it will help them to have me gone when they have the baby to take care of.

When the ginger ale comes, Mommy has me sit up and drink it. I feel better now. She says I should nap, but I don't know if I can. I have too much to think about.

After she leaves the room and shuts the door, I hear Tony come back. I know it's wrong to eavesdrop, but I can't help it. I put the empty glass to my ear against the door and I can hear Mom and Tony talking.

"How's he feeling?"

"Better I think. That poor little boy! He made himself sick trying to please his father."

"Uh, I think Mona plying him with yogurt may've had something to do with that."

"Why would Mother—?" She stops talking because someone knocks. Then she says, "Michael."

"Hi, Angela. How's Jonathan?"

"Better, but you're going to have to get married without him."

"Yeah, I figured. Listen, I've been thinking. Jonathan is a great kid, but I just don't think Heather and I are ready to take him on. He can visit us of course, but maybe he's better off living with you."

"Do you mean it?"

"Yeah, I do. Uh, we'll work out the details later, but I've got to get back downstairs. You two coming?"

"Yeah, we'll be there in a minute," Tony says.

"Oh, Michael, here's the ring." I gave it to Mom while we were waiting for the ginger ale.

"Thanks. I'll need this."

After they all say goodbye, I hear Mommy say, "Tony, we get to keep our little boy!"

"I know! It's going to be great, the whole family together forever!"

So they do want me, even with the new baby. But Daddy and Heather don't, or not very much. I wish Daddy loved me more, but at least Mommy and Tony do. And I think Grandma does, too, although she shows it in sneaky ways.