A/N- Another short chapter, I'm sorry! It's my birthday today so I didn't have much time. To make up for it, although this chapter is short, it is HUGE in terms of hints of what is to come, especially for those who are wishing for some Rory and wondering what's really going on there. Hope you all enjoy! Read, review, recommend if inspired to. I do not own Gilmore Girls but I do own a balloon today and that makes me very happy.
Chapter 14
The next day, Jess had a chance to reflect on his experiences over the last few weeks. He'd seen Rory. Rory Gilmore, muse, town princess, pivotal woman in every story he wrote, and yet he couldn't reconcile himself to her as comfortably as he always had. Something was off.
Furthermore, not only was he making an effort with Lorelai for Luke, but he was beginning to actually not mind being around the woman. He always thought she would be someone who, at the most, he'd have to put up with for Luke or Rory and that she would always be a challenge. The last part was true. In no way was he clamoring to listen to the Bangles or deal with the kind of drama Lorelai Gilmore brings into your life on a regular basis. But as true as those things were, he realized that not only could he deal with Luke's choice, but he was starting to see the good in this woman. Her wit was always entertaining and intelligent, albeit a little dated. She obviously really cared about Luke, as was obvious just in the way they looked at each other. Those types of glances were the things that authors neither of them had heard of or would ever read wrote of and that amazed Jess from the time he could turn a page. And he saw the little bits of Rory here and there. Not just in the coffee or the eating or the repartee but in the insight and kindness and strength and intuition. Understanding Luke's position made it much easier for Jess to handle the crazy. Plus, he had to sympathize with him a bit. There was no hope for any man when it came to falling in love with a Gilmore girl.
He tried to refocus on stacking the rest of the volumes before Lorelai and Luke came downstairs. He had decided to stay at Matt and Chris' place last night after realizing how awkward the whole situation was when it came down to it. He was definitely going to have to just sleep on the downstairs couch in Truncheon when they visited from now on. Getting a bigger place wasn't an option. He had made the decision a long time ago that he wanted to stay still for as long as he could, at least until there was a reason significant enough to make a move. Something like a relationship serious enough to merit a possible need of more space. And there was plenty of space in the apartment for a cozy twosome.
Matt and Chris weren't exaggerated when they mocked his nonexistent dating life. It was pathetic, actually, which was why Jess refused to think about it. It's not that he didn't get attention. He always had, especially when he didn't want it, but he refused to settle, which meant that truthfully he hadn't dated anyone at all in the last few years. He'd gone out once or twice with a few girls, always leaving them in the kindest way possible but never able to become serious with them. Some part of him thought it was time to just realize that there were more options out there and that life wasn't a novel, but that entire thought process was counterintuitive to the major part of his personality. So for now he settled for being the hermit of his family since Luke had abdicated the throne, resting on the idea that he had plenty of time for those things once he felt more stable.
But he was stable. He was ready. He just couldn't reconcile himself with the fact that he was strong and safe and able and wanting to give everything that is a part of a real, serious, possibly lifelong relationship. He couldn't believe it of himself, that he had achieved that. And even though he was ready, he knew in the surest part of himself that maybe he wasn't the only one who needed to get their shit together.