What's a dimension without Oprah?
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"So you're telling me that when we did that spell, we tore the fabric of reality and pulled you out of your dimension?" asked Abby as she sat at her kitchen table across from Damien as Dean paced back and forth in the living room on the phone with Sam who was filling him in on what was happening at Bobby's.
"Yep, ripped it clean open." said Damien as he watched Dean pace. "Damn, that boy still has one of the smexiest rear ends in history, I just wanna lock him up in a glass case and stare all day."
"Wow, that wasn't disturbing at all." said Abby as she stared at Damien in amusement. "I can't say I disagree though." she muttered as she turned to look at Dean who was still pacing.
"Hell I would mount and stuff that thing in an instant and I don't just mean on the wall." said Damien as he winked at her.
"oookay then." said Abby, blinking rapidly as she tried to dislodge the mental image Damien had just lodged in her brain. "So what's your dimension like?" asked Abby. Damien looked back at her with a twinkle in his eye, he opened his mouth then frowned in confusion before closing it back.
"Looks like I'm not allowed to talk about it." he said, pursing his lips in confusion.
"What do you mean not allowed?" asked Abby.
"The powers that be just caught wind of our presence in this dimension and worked some kind of binding spell on us, if we try to talk about the other place, nothing comes out." said Damien.
"hmmm," said Abby as she nodded thoughtfully. "So how exactly did a little summoning spell do something so big?" she asked.
" The spell you and hot stuff did pulled Castiel in this direction and the spell the little nymph did pulled him in another direction and with him being such non-humanesque ball of angelic hotness, it tore a hole in the fabric of reality and we fell through." said Damien.
"Ok, Cas is safe, Lily passed out on the way to Bobby's, they're waiting for her to wake up so they can ask her about the demon." said Dean as he walked over to them.
"What's that?" asked Abby, pointing to a large dark stain on the left side of Dean's shirt. Dean looked at the spot Abby was pointing at and lifted the shirt to check. As the shirt moved higher, Damien's eyes grew wider and wider till they almost bulged out at the sight of Dean's sculpted body.
"That's a nasty booboo Deanny, better let me take care of it." said Damien, leaping out of his chair and practically bouncing over to Dean as a small gash was exposed on midway on Dean's ribcage.
"It's ok, I'd rather not." said Dean quickly lowering the shirt. Damien groaned in disappointment as he was deprived the droolworthy sight of Dean's torso.
"But it might get all infected and gross, you should really. .. " began Damien as he moved towards Dean. He was cut off as Abby popped up between them and put her hands out to stop Damien.
"Let me." she said firmly as she stopped Damien who pouted at her.
"But I. .. ." began Damien.
"Should check out the TV, I think Channel 52's got something you'll really like." said Abby as she pushed on his shoulders, making him sit on the couch, knowing the Mr. Universe pagent was playing on repeat this week.
"Fine." grumbled Damien as he picked up the remote.
"Let's go." said Abby, taking hold of Dean's hand and pulling him.
"Aye aye captain." said Dean with a grin, relieved that she'd gotten the dragon away from him. He chuckled when she stuck her tongue out at him before pulling him towards her bedroom.
"Ooooowheee, girlfriend, I ain't mad at you no more." yelled Damien from the living room as the parade of oiled up, muscular, half-naked men marched across the screen.
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Willow fidgeted as she stared at her sister who was fast asleep on Bobby's couch. She'd dressed her sister's wounds, dismayed at how frail her sister looked. It looked like she hadn't been taking care of herself, her bones were practically jutting out of her skin and she didn't look like she'd slept in days. She listened with half an ear at the conversations going on around her, Gabe was telling them about his encounter with Loki while Felix and Bran argued about whether they should stay in this dimension or try to find a way back. Bran was all for going back, he couldn't stay in a dimension where Oprah was over, he'd all but broken down when Bobby'd told him that.
"That's it, no Oprah, we're leaving, NOW!" he'd practically yelled the minute he was told.
Sam watched Willow out of the corner of his eye, he was wearing what Dean called his moody broody look. In the few hours he'd known her, she'd been constantly flirting with him and touching him but the moment she'd seen her sister she hadn't looked at him once. He hated to admit it but it was driving him a little crazy, she hadn't bothered him as much as he'd pretended she had. He watched as she chewed her bottom lip nervously looking like she would bite clean through it any moment. Suddenly there was a soft moaning sound as Lily woke up.
"Will?" she asked in a quiet voice as she looked up at her sister's worried face.
"It's me Lil." said Willow as she dropped down on the couch next to Lily who was slowly sitting up. "You wanna explain to me how the hell you're alive?" asked Willow.
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Dean sat on Abby's bed as she rummaged through her closet for a first aid kit. His eyes widened in suprise when he spotted a school girl outfit complete with a pleated skirt and tie hanging in her closet. He was about to comment on it when he spotted what looked a pair of grease stained coveralls at the bottom of the closet. He saw a pair of red shorts folded under a white top that read "lifeguard" across the front of it.
"That's one hell of a halloween collection." he commented as he turned his gaze to her.
"Huh?" She asked before realing he was talking about the vast array of clothes in her closet. "Oh, those are work uniforms." she said.
"What exactly do you do?" asked Dean, still preoccupied with the school girl outfit.
"Well right now, I'm unemployed." said Abby as she located the first aid kit and walked over to sit on the bed next to him.
"Well what did you do then?" asked Dean.
"Well a few months after I finished highschool I started college, I wasn't quite sure what I wanted to do but as soon as I realised we couldn't really afford college I left and got a job as a lifeguard but then the pool closed and I got a job at a themed restaurant where all the waitresses had to wear these naughty schoolgirl outfits, but I couldn't take all touchy feely pervs so I quit and got a job at a garage. That was my favorite but after I accidently landed myself in jail I got fired." she said.
"How exactly did you wind up in jail?" asked Dean curiously as she opened the kit and began pulling out a bottle of antiseptic.
"I slapped my boss' son." she said, with a sheepish grin as she pulled out a gauze pad.
"You got arrested for slapping a guy?" asked Dean in surprise.
"Well, I may have been holding a wrench at the time." she said as she found the tape for the gauze.
"Why'd you slap him?" asked Dean with an amused grin as she motioned to him to lift his shirt so she could see the wound.
"He, uh. .. " she was at a temporary loss for words as he reached up and pulled the shirt off. She swallowed hard at the work of art in front of her, her train of thought totally derailed.
"What did he do?" asked Dean gently, thinking that her loss of words was because of whatever the guy had done, not realising it was because of what Damien liked to call his 'devastating sexiness'.
"He accused me of teasing him and tried to er. .. relieve his frustration." she said, rolling her eyes at the last word, doing her best to keep her hands steady as she made quotation signs with her fingers. Truth was she'd been scared out of her mind and the memory of Earl pinning her against the wall with his beefy limbs still gave her nightmares, if she hadn't had that wrench in the pocket of her coveralls she didn't want to think about what would have happened.
"Son of a bitch" exclaimed Dean in anger at the same time that she started to clean the shallow gash in his side that must have gotten there when he flew backwards after the spell.
"Sorry but I have to clean it first." apologized Abby.
"What?" asked Dean, cunfused for a minute before realsing she thought she'd hurt him. "Oh, I didn't even feel that, I was just. .. hang on, how come you were the one arrested then?" he asked.
"He claimed I went ballistic and attacked him for no reason, I didn't have any marks or bruises, just a bit dishevelled and he was sporting a bloody nose and a gash on his cheek, so his story was a lot more believable than mine." she said with a shrug as she covered the wound with the gauze and started taping it down. "You know I still don't understand what he meant by saying I was teasing him, I wore baggy coveralls for goodness sake. Willow was pissed, raved on and on about it for days." she said shaking her head with a grin at the memory of Willow's tirade in her head, not noticing the angry frown on Dean's face, he didn't even know the son of a bitch but he was ready to castrate him for trying to touch Abby. Abby held up the large green shirt and surveyed the side, there was a small rip in the cloth.
"Check it out, looks like the fabric of reality wasn't the only thing that got torn." she said with a grin, sticking a finger in the small hole and wiggling it. Dean chuckled as she grinned at him, he couldn't help it, her smile was infectious. She put the shirt on the side and handed him another one, a little sorry that he had to coverup the masterpiece that was his gorgeous torso.
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"Well it's nice to see you too." said Lily, a little taken aback by the sudden question.
"Aww Lil, I'm super glad to see you, but it's a little weird, afterall you've been dead for the past 10 years." said Willow. "The only reason I'm sure you're actually you is because of the scoreboard on my back."
"I wanted to tell you, I really wanted to but you had to believe I was dead, you're a horrible liar and you'd have been the first person they'd question." said Lily.
'I was prepared to help you escape, Layla and I had a plan, plus they thought you'd died in some horrible accident whiile trying to escape and I got in trouble anyway." said WIllow.
"Who's Layla?" asked Gabe as he dropped down on the couch on the other side of Lily with a loud groan as he rubbed his giant belly which had doubled in size over the past hour.
"She was my mother." said Lily, her eyes glued to Gabe's stomach.
"So what exactly were you and your mom gonna save Lily from?" asked Bobby.
"Layla wasn't my mom, Lily and I are half sisters and we were going to help her escape the minatour's castle." said Lily.
"Minatour?" asked Sam in suprise.
"Yeah, I was supposed to marry it." said Lily.
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Walked in on my aunt and uncle doing something R-rated in the balcony, too traumatized to write a coherent author's note today. .. .