Hard To Get Chapter 14: Lost Souls, a harry potter fanfic

Dark: Read & review plz

Summary/Disclaimer: check the prologue.

Italics – thoughts

"..." – speaking

Chapter 14... Lost Souls

"Sorry!"

There went another statue to the floor.

"I'm sorry!"

Ups, another person losing their balance.

"Ack! Sorry!!" Iris cringed as a tray full of food fell heavily to the floor. Though she was running too fast to even care about helping the people. As the label 'Infirmary' was seen, a large grin curved her lips.

He was there.

Her dragon was back.

No more tears, no more mourning, no more time alone. He was back in her arms now, and she, in his, and there was nothing that would stop her from keeping it that way.

She almost jumped off of her own skin as the door was slammed open, crashing against the wall, the sound monstrous in the usually calm environment.

"By Merlin, Miss Koltchak, please keep it down!" Madam Pomfrey poked her head through a set of burgundy curtains, going back in almost right away.

"Yeah, sorry about that.. Where's Draco?" glancing around the other occupied beds, she didn't spot a familiar blonde shock of hair. So that meant-

"He's right here, child. Be quiet now, he's resting."

The witch parted the curtains, closing them again as she entered, eyes widening slightly as she took in the sight.

The boy was lying down on his back, a thick, definitely warm blanket draped over his lower half. He seemed thinner, and his complexion was even paler than usual.

I can't run anymore
I fall before you..
Here I am
I have nothing left

A shaky hand ran over his cool cheek in a feathery light touch. "Is... Is it that normal to be this cold?" in the end, her voice cracked.

The older woman's warm brown eyes glanced over at her, stopping their careful examination on the wound in the boy's right side, "You need to understand. Aurors do not care if he's only sixteen or twenty-six. They just locked him up and that's that. From what I heard, he refused to eat most of the times. Lack of nourishment and rest and the loss of blood may be the causes for that. He has not enough blood to warm up own his skin, therefore he's cold and pale."

Though I've tried to forget
You're all that I am.
Take me home,
I'm through fighting it

Absently, she nodded. Conjuring a chair, the girl sat down somewhat tensely. Her eyes caught the discreet movement of his hand once in a while, the twitch of his left eyebrow, the casual fluttering of his eyelids. "But he'll be ok... won't he?" a haunted look shadowed her irises, giving her an almost frail look.

The mediwitch smiled softly, "Yes, he will. All he needs is rest and a comfortable bed. And of course, knowing how he is, a nice company will only do him some good."

Broken...
Lifeless...

I give up..
You're my only strength

At the thought, the black haired witch smiled, "I suppose." Taking his hand in both of hers, she held it gently, carefully, intertwining their fingers together. Bringing it to her lips, she kissed his knuckles, rubbing her cheek against his smooth cold skin. "Come back to me soon. Please." Her voice quietened, barely above a murmur.

Without you,
I can't go on
Anymore.
Ever again

Dark blonde eyelashes lifted subtly, showing a set of grey hues, silver and light blue rays running through the middle of the irises, giving them a look of liquid mercury. His nostrils flared once or twice, catching the familiar scent of the Infirmary. So he was back in Hogwarts. Damn that cousin of his... To relieve the pain indeed. The fingers on his right hand flexed experimentally, as did the muscles on his legs. Incredibly sore, but they worked. His side ached terribly and his wrists felt almost raw from the magical binds that had burned into his skin while he was taken to the prison he stayed at. His left hand felt warm, though. He didn't feel warm; hence, he shivered every once in a while since he currently had no shirt on.

His eyes slowly turned to look at whoever held his hand at the moment, being careful to remain still. His breath hitched in his throat.

My only hope
(All the times I've tried)
My only peace
(To walk away from you)
My only joy,
My only strength.
(I fall into your abounding grace)
My only power,
My only life
(And love is where I am)
My only love

Sitting down in a leather black chair, not unlike her own couple of chairs back in her room, was Iris, gently holding his cold hand between both her warmer (even if it was just barely) ones, her lips brushing over his knuckles every so often as she mouthed to herself, tickling the skin there.

The grey hues lightened visibly, turning silver ever so slowly, his own way to soften them. His anger towards what had happened vanished as the idea that she was there, unharmed, sank into his still half groggy mind.

I can't run anymore..
I give myself to you.
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry

"I'm sorry." Even the weak whisper cracked at the end. Well, technically he hadn't talked for three days, it wasn't all that odd.

The silvery eyes, which were just staring listlessly at the opposite wall, not even half way opened, snapped back into attention, the pupils getting smaller as they opened wider, the bluish irises becoming larger. Her pale face turned to look at him, an enormous sense of hope and longing burning in them, making his insides churn with guilt.

In all my bitterness,
I ignored
All that's real and true.
All I need is you

When night falls on me,
I'll not close my eyes
I'm too alive...
And you're too strong

"I shouldn't have escaped. Or tried to. I should've told you everything from the beginning. And if you hate me now, I won't blame you." He continued, his voice breaking again, now for different reasons.

"I should, you know. I really should." The gentle hold of his hand was gone, as was the warmth. Opting not to look into her eyes, he turned his head away from her, even if he knew she was completely right. He did deserve this.

I can't lie anymore,
I fall down before you
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry.

"But I'm sorry too." His light blue eyes, darkened with the pain her mere words caused, turned back to her in surprise, "For not seeing it all before. It was a bit stupid of my part." Confusion seeped into his orbs; her words had double meanings, so what exactly was she referring to? A sad small smile was on her lips, "Yet I can understand your reasons. Sort of." Her warm hand rested over his cheek as her eyes looked deeply into his. It wasn't long until he realised what she was trying to do. And much like the last time she entered his mind, he did nothing to stop her advances. And even if he tried, the only thing he would be able to do would be hurting himself.

Even if her expression was intriguing, he kept quiet. Usually, Draco was the one making the smart and sharp comments, not the other way around.

"Because of all this, I made everyone else's lives miserable, that I know. And I'm sorry for that as well, but I can blame it all on you." Her smile grew, becoming somewhat amused, "You got me really worried, you know. I knew you weren't dead, I'd feel it if you were, but... Still, you could be injured, and I wouldn't know. And yet..." as she spoke, her eyes glazed over, only to focus back on his, "Even though your reasons were downright ridiculous, I forgive you."

My only hope
(All the times I've tried)
My only peace
(To walk away from you)
My only joy,
My only strength.
(I fall into your abounding grace)
My only power,
My only life
(And love is where I am)
My only love

Constantly ignoring...
The pain consuming me
But this time it's cut too deep.
I'll never stray again

"We're just the same. You're all that I am." Her eyebrows relaxed, giving her an almost innocent look. Almost. "Meh, besides I love you. No matter what I say, that won't never change."

Blue eyes changed to a light silver tinge, immediately rolling. What did he expect, she was as sarcastic and proud as he was. "Right, if you say so." Crossing his arms behind his head, his eyes slowly closed. The worst was over. At least that.

A sudden whack on his head made him snap his eyes open, "What the hell's your problem?!"

"You are." A smirk was now on her lips. Iris was looking down at him, standing up, arms crossed firmly over her chest. "You almost made me die with worry." Her head shook gently, "Selfish pureblood."

"I was captured, locked away and almost killed and you call me selfish?" a golden eyebrow was lifted as the boy sat up slowly. Yes, she was back to normal, or so it seemed.

"Well, you were. And still are." The last part was muttered to herself, making his light frown deepen, "When you ran away, you just thought about yourself. Like I said, I was very worried and Ten barely rested." At the mention of her best friend, her eyes lost the happy and playful glint. She continued, her voice much more quiet, "Dumbledore's gone, you know."

Any remotely relaxed posture he might have had disappeared then, his shoulders tensing and making the bandages covering his injuries become uncomfortable. The thought that the worst was over vanished from his mind right after. What now? Knowing he was the responsible for the whole attack and all of its victims was one thing. But knowing one of said victims was someone that actually tried to help him, one of the few people that didn't judge him for his family's background and most of all, someone so close to a girl which he considered his own sister, was a completely different kind of thing. A thing that when someone said he was 'feeling guilty' didn't even start explaining how exactly he was feeling at the moment.

Weary eyes closed as the blonde spoke in the same tone she had just spoken, "And how is she.. taking it?"

The witch sat back down, "Not very well, if you want my honest answer. I know I've been acting like a bitch these last three days, which only makes her feel worse. When she most needs me, is when I go emotionally unstable." She glared at him for a moment, though no feeling was behind the motion, "And it's all your fault."

At her words, he had no courage to keep looking at her. She didn't know just how true that statement was, "I know. I know."

«««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««

Harry looked around the small bedroom.

Just like the coloured office behind him, the area was circular and full of silvery things here and there. A large bookshelf stood to the right, against the wall, all sorts of books packed into it. In his mind, absently he suspected that not another book would fit there; it was completely full. Dividing and holding them, supposedly by categories or something, were silver columns with little phoenixes on their tops. The bed was right in front of him, not big but not small.

To his left, a large window held the view to the lake and a few trees of the Forbidden Forest, the setting sun casting warm oranges and deep reds over the fields and into the wooden floor of the room, every metallic object shining like small diamonds as the sky slowly darkened, purples, dark oranges and fading yellows giving way to the velvety darkness. It may have been considered a gorgeous sight some time in the past, but with the still red and darkened grass from below and the heavy presence of a lost one, that sense was completely gone. His bright green eyes dulled as the heiress passed by him in the bed's direction. Albeit only four days had passed, each sunrise, each sunset weighted down on her shoulders like a handful of years would.

The last few rays of sun light bathed over her pale skin, casting a warm healthy golden glow to it as well as making the dullness of her eyes seem brighter, more alive. Carefully, she sat down on the very edge of said bed, as if afraid to rumple the covers. Slowly, one lone tear slipped down her cheek, as if unnoticed, tracing her jaw line and falling to the wooden floor when reaching her chin.

"No matter how hard I try, I always cry when I enter this room." Her voice was a mere whisper; the heavy silence in the room however, making him hear her perfectly.

Slowly, hesitantly, a few steps were taken in her direction. He sat down beside her, "No one says it's wrong to cry for a loved one."

"I know..." wrapping her arms around herself, the young woman shivered. Long minutes passed in a somewhat comforting silence, until she spoke up again, "But it's not fair. I've lost my parents already..." her eyes looked up at him, brimming with fresh tears, "Is it fair to now lose the last member of my family?"

"Ten-"

"Am I going to lose Iris as well?"

"No, you-"

"Are you going to die next?"

Those six words made his dull green eyes sparkle with confusion and indignation, "No!" Harry got up, kneeling in front of her, his hands resting over both her cheeks. His voice grew warmer as if talking to a small child, "You won't lose me. You won't lose Kolt- Iris. You won't lose Malfoy-"

"-Draco." She interrupted him softly, cracking the smallest of smiles.

When I'm on the loose
It is you who's shining through and through again
Whenever the rain comes down, the sun turns grey
When I needed you, you were always there
When it comes to you, really nothing can compare

At that, he smiled back, "Draco. You won't lose him either. You won't lose any of us. He's pretty strong, in his own way, I know that from experience. Iris is too proud for that, yet she treats you like a sister; she would never leave you. And me..." his lips curved into a light green, "Voldemort's dead. He tried to kill me for the past six years and failed. So," he shrugged, "if I survived the greatest Dark Wizard in history, it would be far too ironic to die because of something else, don't you think?"

Her smile grew, "If you put things that way... I'll have to."

You feel what I feel, know what I know
Even through the darkest night
You'll see what I see
There's a reason to believe in you and me

Her arms fell to her sides as her hands were placed on her lap. It wasn't long till one of his own rested on top of them. Her eyes rose to his.

Never looking away from the endless sky coloured hues, his own lowered half way. Their heads gradually came closer. His lips stole a kiss to the corner of her mouth.

The hands previously guarded in her lap fisted his shirt rather suddenly, pulling him towards her, lips capturing his own desperately. That small attention from before after the days with just a few glances at each other had triggered something, a fire burning in her lower abdomen, hot and longing. The emotions she had been so careful to keep in control ran free through every fibber of her being.

I would die if you left me
Drowning in sorrow
Baby don't kill me tonight
Would you hold on to me, girl?
And love me tomorrow...

The boy moaned quietly against her cold lips. Though instead of pulling her closer as he would usually do, his hands rested over her own, stroking the skin between her thumb and index finger. He wasn't all that sure if she was completely aware of what she was doing or if she was doing it because she felt she should. Reluctantly, but with that thought in mind, he pulled away from her gently.

When I'm feeling blue
It is you who's reaching out for me again
Whenever I need your wings to fly away

Her haunted greyish blue hues looked up into his, wide, questioning, their depths shining with confusion but mainly, hurt. Even before he had heard her whisper, he had known what she would ask, "Why?"

You feel what I feel, hear what I hear
Even through the darkest night
You'll sleep when I sleep
There's a reason to believe in faith 'cause
Heaven sent me you

"I don't want you to rush things because of what happened, Ten. Everything was too sudden and I understand you want-"

I would die if you left me
Drowning in sorrow
Baby don't kill me tonight
Would you hold on to me, girl?
And love me tomorrow
Love me tomorrow again

"Please..." the tears from before returned, now fresh and entirely his fault, "Harry... Let me forget it... Even if just for a while... Please let me forget it all." Before he was able to reply, a slender finger was placed over his lips, her voice lowering even more, "I know you won't hurt me. I know. Please." The finger was replaced by the feathery light touch of her lips, "I need you."

So if you need me, I will be near
Another thousand miles, I will be there
I will hear you, I will see through
Even through the darkness, I'll be true

His eyes closed.

It's not right. I shouldn't.

Malfoy does it, all the time.

I'm not like him. Ten's not like him. We-

And he kissed her.

We need each other. His eyes snapped open; that hadn't been his thought. Bright emerald locked with light blue. His lips turned upwards into a smile against hers, now warmer by his own skin.

I would die if you left me
Drowning in sorrow
Baby don't kill me tonight

Her petite hands started unbuttoning his shirt deftly, fingers running over his muscles, feeling the skin there twitch beneath her touch. Her eyes – were they actually brighter, or was it just him? – looked up to his once more, his shirt now completely open.

A hand reached up, resting over her cheek. Like her lips, under his warm touch, her skin was cold. "Are you sure?" the words were whispered quietly, hanging in between them.

She smiled. Not a smile that didn't reach her eyes like the ones she gave everyone else to cheer them up, but a real one. "I'm sure."

Their lips met once more, gently, softly, not rushing. His arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer and onto his lap. The heiress sat sideways, arms coming up to wrap about his neck and secure herself, their eyes closed.

And so I wrote you these words down
For you to remember,
For you to remember why

I love you...

Breathing came in second place, or so it seemed, their lips only parting if there was a really serious need for it. Harry let his body fall backwards, pulling her along with him so that she was half lying on top of him. Shaky fingers found their way down the buttons of her shirt, slowly pulling it off her as they both stopped kissing for a few seconds, the sounds of their harsh breathing the only sounds in the room.

Forest green locked with darkened light blue hues. As if a silent understanding had crossed between them, Harry rolled to his left, now on top of her. His hands went around her back to clumsily unclasp her bra, lips trailing from her temple to her jaw line in a feathery like touch. By the time he had taken off the annoying item and let it fall silently to the floor, her eyes had drifted close, an absent smile on her face. She almost seemed completely healed to him... Almost.

His lips claimed hers, the desperation from the last few kisses now controlled. His hands trailed down from her waist to her hips, starting to take off the jeans she was wearing. His own trousers, he now noticed, seemed to be somewhere on the floor already.

A soft whoosh indicated her pants had also landed on the floor. He felt her tremble lightly under his touch; whether it was from the cold it was now being felt from the time of the year or if it was actually his touch, he didn't know.

His hands covered her breasts almost shyly at the same time as he kissed her once again. In response, her arms tightened around his neck, pulling him closer, a quiet moan muffled by his own lips. The boy relaxed somewhat; at least he wasn't scaring her.

Only to shiver unexpectedly, as Harry felt her hands run down his back and over his sides and chest. A groan escaped him.

Ten reluctantly parted the kiss, looking up at him as his eyes opened slowly. Her kiss-swollen lips drew a small, if not insecure, smile.

He smiled back reassuringly. His hands rested over the sides of her panties, pulling them down slowly, deep green eyes never leaving hers. His lips brushed over the skin of her eyelids, her temple, her cheek, the tip of her nose. "I heard this hurts." He whispered, lips just above her own.

"I know." Tilting up her chin, their lips met briefly, "But I'm with you." Their lips met tenderly, his hands resting over her hips, her own tangled in his hair. As the kiss deepened and her body relaxed, the boy took the chance to enter her suddenly, stopping immediately as he suddenly felt her tense. The kiss was broken by a painful gasp coming from her part.

The jade coloured orbs opened, watching as her features turned from pleasantly contented to painful in a way he would never be able to describe. He supposed it would be like having a dull pain in your abdomen; you knew it was there, but no position or remedy would make it go away. Just that, maybe, it might be worse. One of his hands reached for hers, which in turn, she gripped painfully tight. He leaned in, nuzzling her neck, the words "I'm sorry." whispered every few seconds.

It seemed like a very long time, which were only one or two minutes, until she started relaxing again, letting go of his hand. Her darkened eyes were a few tinges lighter, the sudden pain overcoming her passion for a bit.

He bit the side of his inner lip, "Are you alright?"

In answer, the girl merely nodded. The pain was fading. Her tongue wet her upper lip leisurely, "Don't stop." As a small enticement, her hips rolled under his hands, causing him to bit back a quiet groan.

The only sounds in the room were their fast breathing and soft, quiet moans mixing together as they moved as one, sweat lingering on their skin.

Her body grew tense as she reached her climax, features a mixture of pleasure, surprise and satisfaction. Not long after, his hands tightened their hold on her not so gently, as he also reached his own climax. Not that she would notice that until she woke up several hours later, when she would see herself in the full length mirror of her bathroom.

As their vision came back to focus and breathing calmed down enough, one of her hands rested over his cheek tenderly. Instinctively, he leaned into her touch.

"Thank you. I think I really needed that." Her lips turned into a tired smile, "I love you."

"Love you too."

They laid in bed in a tangle of limbs, tired, spent and in a comfortable silence. Eventually, as the minutes passed by, Ten shivered lightly. That made the other blink and sit up, pulling the covers over them both.

Harry laid back down again, motioning for her to come closer, which she did, snuggling into his chest comfortingly. Long after her breathing had become regular as sleep claimed her, his green orbs were still open, his arms wrapped protectively around her waist. Concern and sadness mixed in them, one thousand thoughts passing through his mind.

No, it had nothing to do with what they had just done. It had felt right, in every aspect. But there was something that wasn't accurate, something amiss.

And it was rather simple. Albus Dumbledore.

He had still seen it in her eyes, that awful sadness, the feeling of being the only one in the world, that everyone was against you. He himself had felt that way a few times.

And like always, he hoped it would go away. Though in this case, he didn't expect it from his part.

Still, her soul wasn't pure anymore; she had seen death, death in a way he had never seen it. The death of a beloved one.

Leaning in, he let his lips brush her temple. Her lips formed a sleepy absent smile at that, her body snuggling closer to his. Despite the sadness of it all, the boy felt a replying smile of his own.

To everything, there is a season. A time to be born and a time to die. A time to be happy and a time to grieve.

…TBC…

Thanks 2:
Tenebrae Rosa: thnx, I really am going 2 need all the luck I can get xP oh, & a chappie dedicated 2 u, ne ;)