" I don't think we should go to DC" Steve had said, " or New England, or anywhere that Fury says."
They hadn't moved from the couch, and a new thunderstorm began rolling into the late night hours. Neither were tired, content, but not tired. They wanted to figure out what was going to happen next. Natasha began feeling ill again, and Steve had her lay down along the couch, with her head resting on a pillow in his lap.
" Is that what you were researching before you watched a human baby being born?" she asked.
Steve nodded, but she could not see, " Fury is the one who told me not to trust anyone, maybe he expects us to go on the run, and have no idea where we are."
Natasha closed her eyes, hoping it would calm her stomach, " so, we go back to New Jersey?"
" London."
And then, they popped open, " London, England? You think that we should leave the country?"
His fingers stroked her hair, gently pushing it back on the pillow, she loved that feeling. " I do, be out of sight, but in plain sight where no one knows the difference. An ocean could be the perfect cover up." He then became nervous when she didn't respond, " if you think it's a bad idea, we can go back to the drawing board."
" I trust you to make the best decision" she said, " for all of us."
" We're going to need new identities. I know that's your speciality."
She let out a laugh, " Captain England."
0000000000
Five Weeks Later
0000000000
Natasha thought she felt her body being nudged forward, and then roll back to its original position in the bed. It was enough to jolt her out of a deep sleep now she was hanging out on the border. She was still trying to process when the shove came again. Now, she knew.
" Whaaaaat" She grumbled, tasting the pillow case in her mouth, feeling the mattress give way beside her.
Steve scooted closer, pressing up against her back, " Natasha" he whispered, " Natasha!"
The voice, it was the strict captain voice, but with a gentle tone. She sighed when feeling his fingers gliding along her back, " mmmmm, what?" and she was hoping his response would come before she drifted off again. Her eyes were still closed, senses at a minimum.
" Can I touch your tummy?"
Natasha's head turned so fast, she almost took him out, " what?" the question was becoming repetitive, " why do you want to touch my tum...my stomach" her voice remained very light.
Steve pressed his forehead against hers, " because of the baby."
Her eyes closed and she smiled, not sure if he would be ale to see it, " You can't feel anything yet. I can't even feel anything yet, it'll be awhile."
" But there's still a baby."
Who was she to argue, or worse, dampen his excitement. She laid back down, in the same position as before, and lifted her shirt, just enough to expose her protruding stomach. Steve cuddled right behind her, arm curling over her waist, hand splaying over her. It was warm on contact, she let out an appreciative sigh. If there was one thing she never had to worry about, it was his protective instincts, even over something so tiny.
" You never have to ask" she said, " it's your baby, too."
Steve kissed her shoulder, " but, it's inside you."
Natasha's hand stroked his, " you still don't have to ask. Consider this a verbal pass until the baby is born. I'll sign something in the morning if you want me to."
His hand began to move in circles over her stomach, " did you know that you can feel the baby move as early as the sixteenth week? But it could be as late as eight weeks after that."
She smiled again, " no, I didn't know that."
" But, it may take longer for me to feel it. However, the baby is moving now" he paused, moving his hand again, " but, nothing."
" Where are you getting all this?"
Steve opened one eye and looked around, " the internet." It still fascinated him.
Natasha looked over his shoulder, her nose almost brushing against his, " careful what you read, one wrong article and you're going to scare yourself."
But his open eye remained just as bright, " did you know the gender is determined at conception?"
She rolled back and let out a snort, " you sure you don't want to deliver the baby?"
" Yep" he felt Natasha laugh and waited a moment, " do you want a boy or a girl?"
She had allowed for her eyes to close again, " I haven't thought about it, to be honest" she held his arm closer to her body, " I just thought of it as a baby, it's still so small."
The room went silent, and she could feel his deep breaths as his chest pressed against her shoulder blades. She, too, was growing more exhausted and slowly drifting off.
" I think it's a girl" he whispered.
That certainly got her attention, " really?"
He mumbled for confirmation, " a little girl."
" I sure hope it's little" she muttered, " Captain America doesn't want a son to carry on the tradition?"
" A daughter could do that."
She grinned, " you're going to allow your little girl to fight crime?"
Another pause, " good point. But, it's still a girl."
" I love that you want a girl" she cooed.
" Yeah" her hand rubbed over his again adding to the warmth, " I don't know, I just like the idea of protecting a little girl from the big, scary world."
He picked up his head, " I would protect a boy, too. I mean, I will."
" Steve, there is no part of parenthood that I think you cannot handle."
His head plopped down on the pillow again, " not everything."
Natasha rolled onto her back, their hands stayed in the same place, " you'll never rest again, will you."
" I'm over-obsessing, aren't I?"
" Not that it's a bad thing, but we still have months left."
" That's not a lot of time!"
Her hand reached up to lay along his cheek, " are you sure there isn't something else bothering you?"
He pushed himself up higher to readjust, but she took the opportunity to slide under him, but their contact remained, her eyes locked on him. " I just don't want anything to go wrong. Maybe that's a bad way to word it" and he looked away.
Natasha's hand reached for his, she grabbed it and moved it back to her stomach, this time over her shirt that had slid back down. She took a moment to silently admire that any time she did touch her, there was always a soft massage or caress, and she knew that wasn't all for her. It got his attention even if he couldn't feel anything on the other side just yet.
" Everything goes on in here, we just have to make sure everything is ready out here. There's no way for us to be one hundred percent ready, doesn't matter if its our first baby or our tenth" his eyes spasamed when she said ' tenth.' " I know it worried you, that you can't be prepared."
Steve rolled out of her touch and onto his back, though his hand stayed on her stomach, "it's the one thing happening to us that's not a bad thing, and that scares me." She stayed quiet for a brief moment, watching his fingers travel across her shirt. He never complained, not even when provoked to do so. Maybe this was his breaking point, but she was waiting for it, and wanted to catch him.
" So, that's what's bothering you" she whispered.
And she knew he was referring to Bucky, in some sense, though it would not be said, " everything else has been taken away from us."
" I'm still here."
" Yeah, but for how long."
" Steve!" she snapped, slapping his shoulder.
Steve rolled onto his side, his back now facing her, " sorry" he muttered.
He was sincere, in addition to being moody.
0000000000
Natasha slept soundly for the remainder of the night, and awoke to the bright sunshine (they really needed to get curtains) as well as an empty bed. She wasn't surprised by the lack of company- in fact, she knew there was a good chance he didn't go back to sleep at all.
Also not to her shock, there was a note that had been left on her bedside table.
Dear Nat + Baby,
I went out for a walk, and didn't want to wake either of you. I'll meet you at your doctors appointment, and I'm so sorry about last night. I love you both- Steve'
She smiled, and remembered it was a good thing the note mentioned a doctors appointment, because she had forgotten. Finding the best doctor possible was Steve's top priority the moment they set foot in London, and today was the first appointment they were able to schedule- which practically gave Steve ulcers.
She pulled back the bedsheets, her bare feet stepping onto the cold, hardwood floor. The apartment came soon after the doctor, but Steve was just as careful regarding those details. Eventually, they settled on a small, two bedroom location that was above a new age shop. The quaint style was more in Steve's comfort zone, and she was starving for simplicity herself, so it made that decision easy. Anything to counter act his reaction to the store downstairs.
Walking by the bathroom mirror, her reflection would catch her off guard. Not that she actually believed the new, dark brown hair color would really throw off even the dullest bad guy out to get her, but she had been so caught up in all the other changes, what was one more.
Natasha quickly showered and dressed for the day. Her clothing options were becoming more and more limited, faster than she was expecting. Twelve weeks didn't seem too far down the road, but her uterus said different.
" You're calling the shots now, Sergeant" she said, while pulling one of Steve's shirts over her body. This was going to have to be addressed soon.
Her spring jacket, fortunately, still fit, even if she wasn't able to zip it up. She slipped the directions to the office in her pocket and headed out. The little village they chose to start a new life was perfect, narrow streets that were decorated with various shops and other low key attractions. Downtown London was not far, so there was the advantage of the big city blend in without the crowd.
The office was only a few blocks away (and she did make the note that they should probably locate the actual hospital, though it was likely that Steve already had), it was an old home that had been converted, and the waiting room was just inside the front door. Steve was right where he said he would be. He wasn't dressed like he had gone out for a long stroll, but she wouldn't bring that up right now.
He stood up when he saw her walk in, looking like he had dome something wrong. She saw a single rose enclosed in his left hand, which he was quick to hand over to her.
" I would have loved to see you go in for this appointment before I even got here" she said with a smile.
Steve pulled her against hid body, " I'm so sorry" he whispered, breathing in the fresh scent of her shampoo, " I am such a jerk, and I had no right to be speaking to you like that."
Natasha let out a little giggle, " I appreciate the apology, but, you didn't do anything wrong."
" My fears are not your problem."
" Yes, they are" she looked up at him, " we're in this together, and if you have any concerns, I want you to talk to me about it. I can handle it."
He squeezed a little tighter, " I will, but, for right now I think the receptionist is leering at us."
She laughed again, and he released her, " I'm glad you came today."
" Well, I was lucky that there was an opening in my schedule and all."
Neither of them had participated in anything 'work' related since arriving in London- other than settling in to a new, if not fake, life. Steve also found a side job of making sure Natasha pretty much did nothing out of fear, and she knew that staying at home all the time was taking its toll on him. It was starting to drive her insane, as well.
They weren't given the chance to sit down again, before a young nurse emerged from the back hallway and called Natasha's name. Well, she called Cady Grant's name- the name on Natasha's fake passport. That seemed to be their biggest adjustment so far. He would get use to it, maybe. She tired to make it into a game, but for the most part, he was just uncomfortable.
The two were led to one of the exam rooms, being told that the doctor would join them shortly. Steve seemed surprised that he wasn't staying in the waiting room, and even more surprised by everything around him. He stood in the doorway, like he would self combust if he actually went inside. She watched him look around, like everything he had learned about in the current century was eliminated from his head.
" I don't know what any of this is" he whispered, eyes in every direction as Natasha changed into the cloth gown.
She snorted, stepping up to sit on the edge of the leather bound examination table, " you don't have to know all of it" she whispered back.
Steve was studying a chart on the wall, once he had finally gone inside, which illustrated the stages of labor and birth. " I am SO sorry that this is going to happen to you.
" Hey, no, stop looking at that. Stop, come here" she held out her hand, and he did as told, standing next to her at the table, " we're going to get to see the baby, aren't you excited?"
He slowly nodded, " yeah, I am. Hey, I wonder how different it'll look from the last time."
Oddly enough, the only person who knew how the baby looked last time, at least of anyone they knew, was Tony. He never had the chance to give Natasha the pictures from the first ultrasound.
There was a quick knock on the door, and a blonde woman appeared in the room, greeting them with a warm smile. She appeared to be in her early forties, and wore a brightly colored sun dress under her lab coat.
" You must be Cady" her accent was very strong, " I'm Victoria. Well, Doctor Shepard, but lets stick with Victoria."
Natasha shook her hand, " hello, so nice to meet you. This is my husband, Mark" Steve said hello, and mimicked the hand shaking. IT was best that Natasha introduced him by the fake name for the time being.
" Americans!" the doctor seemed delighted with the discovery of foreigners, " how wonderful!" she held the beige file at her side, " mind me asking what brings you both across the pond?"
It amazed Steve with how easy it was for Natasha to play along with a false life. That's usually why she interacted with any new people since moving there, though there had been only a few. Her lies were so effortless that it stunned him. She was amazing at it.
" Well, I wanted to get my Masters at Oxford" the way she spoke sounded just like it did when she told similar lies to the Apple store employee, " I'm lucky to have a supportive husband, especially now with a baby coming."
Except now, they were married, and they even wore wedding bands to play along. Hearing her tell strangers about their marriage, even to their land lady who heard all about a wedding that never happened. IT made him question if he was suppose to propose the idea of a real one. As Natasha continued speaking with the doctor, he tried to read if thats what she really wanted- his best guess was likely not. He was programmed to believe that it was the right thing to do, even if they were going a little out of order.
" Now, your file says you haven't seen a doctor since the seventh week?" Victoria was reading her file again, it was back to business.
Natasha shrugged, " it was a crazy couple of weeks, with the move and all. But, if the vomiting indicated anything, it all seems to be normal."
" Has the vomiting since stopped?"
" For the most part."
Victoria gently tossed the file onto a nearby tray, " wonderful, why don't you go ahead and lay back?"
Natasha leaned back against the leather, the layer of paper crinkling under her weight. Victoria opened a few of the snaps on the front of the gown, revealing her bare stomach.
" What about you, Mark?" she asked while sitting on the stool next to the table, " are you excited about fatherhood?"
He was still getting adjusted to the name, and Natasha was looking up at him as though he was going to give a different response. But, he didn't- " I'm thrilled."
The doctor smiled, puling form the drawer under the table a small device- a portable speaker with what looked like a small microphone attached to it by a black cord. Steve thought technology was getting the best of him (again), but his better half seemed just as perplexed.
" Let's find the little guys heartbeat, shall we?"
The tip of the microphone glided along the underside of Natasha's stomach, slowly making its way around. The sounds that were emitted form the speaker were muffled, dead air. It sounded like they were scanning the bottom of the ocean floor, waiting for any sort of changed. The time seemed to drag on, until, suddenly:
Jackpot.
It was the most peculiar sound, a loud, strong echo of a very consistent, thumping sound. Natasha gasped, and Steve flinched. Neither had expectations on what this experience would be like (heck, Steve didn't know it was possible), but such a vibrant sound kept them speechless.
They also didn't expect the doctor to be just as taken aback as well, but she appeared to be just as stunned.
" That's a heck of a heartbeat" Victoria's gaze grew more concerned, " certainly very fast."
She removed the microphone, and the sounds stopped, though the heartbeat was still fluttering, even if it was going on without being heard.
Natasha propped herself up on her elbows, " is that bad? What's wrong?" and Steve looked as though he would vomit.
Victoria stood up, "I'm going to do a sonogram, just to take a quick look."
She strolled across the room for the proper equipment, and to turn off the lights. In the dark, Natasha's hand reached for Steve's, and their fingers laced together.
" It's okay" he whispered, feeling her tremble.
The wall next to them illuminated with a blue screen as the projector began warming up.
" Have you felt any cramping at all? Any movements?"
Natasha shook her head, eyes tightly closed, " no, I haven't felt anything at all."
Victoria squeezed warm gel onto her bare stomach, and she began having flashbacks to the last time she was in this position. She promised it would be different this time, but ended up being just as scared. She could feel the wand from the sonogram machine traveling across her skin, but her head was turned away. There was silence in that room for agonizing moments.
Then, she felt Steve's hand squeeze a little righter, " look at the baby" he said, having leaned down to get her attention.
And she did just that, trust Steve's judgement since he had looked first. The sonogram was projected on the wall, and frankly, it made the little being look like a monster. The mixture of grey and black coloring made the image more disoriented, but she was able to see the outline of the child's head and body.
" There's the little bugger' Victoria announced, examining the picture just as closely as they were.
They watched the baby's small body as it rocked back and forth in the womb, all this action that couldn't be recognized on the outside. A little hand appeared, rising up near the head.
" Oh, someone knows we're watching!"
Steve looked down at Natasha, whose eyes were locked on the screen. He had never seen them so wide, or focused. Her mouth was opened slightly, and there was no breaking her gaze, but her head stayed firmly in his.
" Is everything alright?" Steve dared to ask.
The wand pressed harder into the pelvic muscles, " yes, I'm sorry if I worried you, but all is well. That certainly is a strong heartbeat, though. There must be some strong genes from one of you two."
Natasha finally looked away form their child and up at him.
" Right here is the heart beat, and there's the spine, this right here looks to be the mouth. And I hope you Americans still plan on celebrating Thanksgiving when you're over here, you'll have a good reason. Now, the date may change, but right now I would pin point it at the end of November."
" Nice to have some clarification on that" Natasha said.
Steve perked up a little, " can you tell if its a boy or a girl yet?"
" Hey!" Natasha smacked his hand, " we haven't decided if we want to know that, yet."
Victoria laughed, " don't let the projection fool you, it's far too early to tell" she flipped a switch, and the baby was gone. The lights came back on. " But, if I had to guess, with that heart beat, I would say a boy. But don't quote me just yet."
Natasha looked up, worried that Steve would be crushed, but she saw the corner of his mouth curl. Her stomach was cleaned off, and she sat up again, readjusting the gown.
" I would like to see you again in four weeks, but please don't hesitate to call or stop by with any concerns" Victoria opened one of the drawers under the counter, and brought out a rather large stack of pamphlets, " help yourself to some free education!"
Once Victoria had left, Steve made a quick dash for those pamphlets, but Natasha grabbed the back of his shirt.
" Easy there, Captain. That's enough for you."
0000000000
I apologize for the delay, but thank you for reading!