Just an idea I had. Edvy needed more attention than I gave it before.
Chapter Fourteen
Edvy returns
"Oh, Edward," Envy sighed, snuggling closer to his lover's exposed chest. "I'm so glad that we have fangirls who're willing to work out the little kinks in our relationship for us..."
"I know what you mean," said Edward, kissing Envy's neck. "How could we ever manage to love each other if they weren't there to make all our actions seem logical?"
"Exactly!" said Envy. "Because, really, we could get a lot of haters if it weren't for them... After all, I'm a few hundred years older than you."
"Well, you know what they say!" Edward said with a grin.
"'If Edward and Bella can be together, so can Ed and Envy'!" they said in unison.
Envy laughed. "And where would we be without 'their "hatred" for each other is just a manly way of hiding their love'?"
"We'd both be miserable," Edward said with a nod as he reached for Envy's hand. "And how about 'it's only sort of yaoi because Envy's not really a guy or a girl'?"
"Oh, you," Envy giggled as his cheeks turned bright pink. "Come on, let's have sex!"
Envy tackled Ed.
Envy forgot that he weighed hundreds of pounds in his true form.
Ed was crushed.
Even the most rabid of Edvy fangirls couldn't excuse that one away.
The End
Chapter 51, page 35. Look it up.
I think that I now understand why most Edvy fics are crappy high school AU.