A/N: My patient lovely readers, i Promise the time is coming. Were right around the corner from the big show.

After are first real fight thing's were a little tense between us. It was hard sometimes to be so near him, so I retreated. I spent more and more time in my room, or with Ally. I hated to see the rejection everytime I slipped up, to know that he simply didn't want me the same way I wanted him. That was the only real conclusion I could reach, cause it would be impossible, if he felt the way I did, to stay away from me so much.

My daily visits turned to once a week visits, I stopped in to check on my babys, but it was usually while he was away at school. I spent more time with my parents, playing piano with Dad and reading with Mom, but they were busy alot. They were a happily married couple who couldn't stay away from eachother, thankfully they usually left before I heard to much.

School was normal, it was starting to bore me, the excitement I once felt about being emerged in human interaction turned to anoyyence with the hormone riddled adolescents. The only class that ever held my interest was art, and Ally had a blast turtoring me in health because we were studying sex ed this year. You would think normal school's have health once in the four years, with sex ed being a couple weeks course. Oh no, we had health every year and the courses took months.

I tried finding thing's to accommodate my time with, grandma installed another book case in my room, holding my expanding collection. She suprised me with plans for a medium size shed she was planning on building in the backyard. It would sit in the far left side of the property, and would be a special spot for me to store my paintings and I could set my easel there. She laughed when she told me, looking at the expanding pile of paintings in the corner of my room.

She had it built and finished in less then a week. I really loved it, it was a pretty big size, probably around the size of Jacob's living room. It had special storage racks on one side, and my easel on the other, it was made from a light natural wood, with the inside painted white and large windows, the casings and cabinets painted a pale pink. There was a plush love seat in the front corner, and wide double doors opened to outside. It was peaceful and bright, and the perfect spot.

So I spent the following months painting, reading and generally avoiding. The more time went on the more upset I grew. I was upset about the way thing's had gone, how far apart I felt from Jake these days. I had let my feelings for him get in the way of are freindship. So I decided one day I was done, I missed my best freind. It was early spring, and summer was around the corner.

I got home from school and changed, made my way to his home and laid on the coach, waiting for him to get home. I must of fell asleep, cause next thing I knew I opened to my eyes to his face, just a foot away from mine. Emotion immediately bubbled in me, rushing over the edge and I sat up, hugging him tightly. My eyes welled and spilled over.

"Nessie what's wrong? Shhh, its okay. Dont cry hunny. Its alright." He sat down, pulling me to him and holding me tightly. He stroked my hair, rocking us slightly.

"Please tell me what's wrong hunny." His voice was hard, worried. I sniffed, trying rein myself in. I knew I must of been freaking him out. I opened my palm, trying to find the right words.

Iv missed you. I thought. I didn't think I could get more then that out.

He laughed once, holding me tigher. " Iv missed you two hunny, im so sorry I let this happen." I shook my head, but held him closer.

No jacob. This wasn't just you, I let..other things get in the way of are freindship. Thats wasn't fair. Iv missed you so much. Im so sorry.

He held me for a while, and I tried to ignore my racing heart, and the feeling of his body pressed to mine.

I pulled back after a while, feeling overwhelmed. I stayed with him that afternoon, making dinner in his house and we stayed up watching movies. I remembered sitting on the coach near him, my arm brushing his. I felt so relaxed being near him again, I woke up sometime later, in Jake's arms being carried. He brought me to my room, laying me on the bed and pulling my covers up.

"Jacob, My Jacob." I mumbled.

"Shh, go to sleep hunny." He said calmly, stroking my hair. I felt his lips brush my cheek, I couldn't remember when the last time he did that was, and I was pulled back under.

Thing's went mostly back to normal, at least pre fight normal. It was still frustrating being with him and not being able to really be with him the way I wanted. But atleast I had my bestfreind back, and that was the most important thing.

We were studying one night, for finals. He got out of school a week before I did, so his finals started tomorrow. We were sprawled around the living room, a pizza box on the coffee table.

"You know, I think next year I might take some of my required classes online. I don't really like having to drive back and forth everyday."

"As long you think you'll have the time for that. It seemed to work out last time." I smiled at him, happy for his accomplishments. He grinned back, and my heart flutterd. He smiled bigger and I blushed.

"Well if I do that ill have time in the morning's to drive you again."

"You just wanna drive my Tesla." I teased. He grabbed another slice of pizza, standing up and stretching. I watched him, watched the way his muscles moved over his body. I sighed, looking down at my home work. He sat on the coach, watching me go over my notes. I felt his eyes on me, and I glanced up.

"What?" I asked self conscious. He just smiled, serenely.

"Your kinda incredible." I blushed, looking down. I should of known better then to push my luck, but I was just a glutton for punishment.

"Hey Jake...have you..uh, thought anymore about..you know?" His face fell and my insides dropped. I immediately regretted bringing it up.

"I just..don't understand it. Why?" I hurried, trying to salvage are night.

"Ness, its just..what we have is so important. That bond we shared, the imprint its sacred, and its the most important part of me, and I have to take care of it, protect it. Which means we need to wait till things are right, I have to make sure I do it right." His words made sense, but somehow they didn't seem to fit right. I understood what he meant about are bond, it was a huge part of me, and if thing's somehow got messed up I would be devastated, but his words didn't seem like they were meant to protect, more like they were there to avoid. I nodded, keeping myself calm and relaxed. I had to be grown about this, if I broke down everytime I thought about it I would get no were.

"I think your wrong tho." I said calmly. "Not about the imprint, I fully agree on that one. You might have imprinted on me, but I feel that, I can't live without you the same way you can't live without me. But I think your using it as a crutch, the bond is there to tell us what we need, not to come between us." His eyes stared into mine, watching me talk. He seemed speechless, just looking at me even after I was done talking.

"I just..need alittle more time." I was expecting the awnser, so it didn't sting as much. But it still hurt. I nodded, getting up and gathering my thing's. I smiled, trying to show him I wasn't that upset.

"Im ganna head to bed, ill see you tomorrow Jacob." I walked over, and kissed his hot cheek, trailing my hand down his arm and stepped away, making my way outside.

I laid in bed with Jacob on my mind. I knew I had made the right decision to go to him when I felt him slipping away, I knew that even if it killed me I wouldn't ever let him go. If he decided that he would never be ready for us I would have to accept that awnser no matter what. I agreed about are bond, it was the most important thing to me, it was my foundation, without him I would shake and collapse. But to me that was the reason I didn't understand him. He says he needs to protect it, and wait till..what? But he doesn't understand that's exactly why it will work, are connection runs so deep, its so engraved in the very core of me how would things ever not work out? We were made for eachother, mind, body and soul. Isnt that what the imprint is for? To find your other half?

I rolled over, trying to fall asleep. I sighed and got up, making my way over to the window seat, and looking down into his room, he was outcold. Sprawled across his bed, his broad chest bare and the blanket pulled around his hips. I battled with myself, but lost, getting up and grabbing a sketch pad from my desk and sitting back down.

I new sleep was distant so I concentrated on my sketch. Starting with his outline, he truly was huge. It amazed me how many bands of muscles wrapped themselves around his body. Maybe if he wasn't so tall it wouldn't be so drastic. I moved to his face, drawing the line of his strong jaw, his straight nose. His eyes were closed, his face peacefull. I loved watching him sleep, his carefully controlled features melted away and gave way to his almost childlike innocence. I was thankful for my extended eye sight from the vampire part of me, it allowed me to see the long eyelashes resting on his cheeks, the soft form of his lips. They were parted slighlty, for once not hanging wide open with a snore coming out. I traveled down his neck, across his shoulers and down each arm. His hands, like the rest of him were large, rough from years of working with them, but I knew for a fact how gentle those hands could be, how soft they were on my cheek, or how gently they engulfed one of my own. I worked back down his chest, carefully drawing out every abdominal muscle, the slight slope of his waist. My heart started to beat faster, pumping through my body and I tried to ignore it. I sketched his lower abdomen, following the dark trail of hair that started from his bellybutton and disappeared under his covers, I moved on to the deep V, tracing that till it to disappeared. Alittle frustrated, I moved on to the covers drapped over his lower body, finding the outline of him under the sheet. I stared at the sketch, trying to find any anomalies. When I was satisfied there were none I got up, feeling the tiredness creeping its way into me. I crawled into bed, putting the sketch pad under my pillow and pulling the blankets over my head. I was out in minutes.