So as you can see from the last chapter the traffic stats that let me see how many people have read my story are down. And since they are I don't know if you guys are reading this. I assume you guys are but I don't know for sure. Until the stats are fixed I really want you guys to leave a comment at the bottom telling me you've read this. Please and thank you. Thanks to the one guest for telling me they read it last time.

Betas for this chapter are: LittleDrummerGirl2010 and Literatifan4eva. You guys are great.

Also thanks to Prongs Smitch for looking over this even though you didn't find anything wrong.

Chapter 14: You Really Love Me

When the rest of the school returned from Christmas holiday on the eighth of January, Mandy pulled her sister aside and waved the potions book at her. "Who told you?" Mandy snapped. Parker took hold of the book to properly read the title.

"Potions while Pregnant? No one had to tell me. I'm your twin sister and even though I'm not as close to you as James or even Sirius is, I notice things. You getting sick every morning. Not drinking at the "I've Never" game, saying it was something you ate. The nail in the coffin so to speak was you quitting Quidditch. You're not too busy. You've never been too busy," Parker said. "I just wish you would have told me."

"What about Mother and Father?" Mandy asked.

"My parents? Of course they know. Dumbledore told them the day he found out."

"But I'm of age."

"Doesn't matter, you're still a student. He wanted them to know to prevent them from finding out any other way. They told me not to tell you, but I figure I owe you that much to not keep this from you. They're disappointed, but you're still their daughter. Dumbledore told them you're giving it up for adoption."

"I can't keep this gift. Besides I turned out okay. Do Tiff and Shelly know?"

"No, neither does Talon. I'm not going to tell any of them. I'm glad now I at least know where I stand with you." Parker glared at her sister and walked away.

Mandy sighed and shook her head. That wasn't how she wanted the conversation to go but knew there was already too big of a rift formed between her and Parker to ever get back to being close friends again. She didn't know when the rift had started to form, whether it was because of her friendship with James or if it was something else, but if pressed, Mandy figured it had something to do with Talon. When Talon had been caught sneaking around with Parker, Mandy's heart was broken, but she also felt betrayed by her own sister. Not that she had known they were sisters at that point, but Parker was still family. It had still hurt her. Somehow the girls hadn't really made up from that and as time passed, Mandy had stopped hanging around her sister and things just weren't the same.

The following day, after breakfast, McGonagall asked to see Mandy, then told her that they would begin Transfiguration lessons that afternoon in her classroom promptly at four. Mandy agreed and promised to be there. The lesson went by smoothly and Mandy was surprised at how kind and gentle her head of house could be when it was just the two of them. She broke every spell down step by step and didn't get angry when Mandy didn't get it the first time. However, Transfiguration wasn't the only subject McGonagall trained her on. She also taught her Charms, which was evidently the older witch's second best subject and had been McGonagall's mother's best subject.

During one such training session in the middle of January, Mandy brought up something that had been bothering her. Normally transforming into her bear form was no problem for Mandy, but with the full moon on Christmas it had taken all of her concentration to transform.

"Professor McGonagall, I was wondering, not that I want to try to become one while I'm in this condition or even if it's possible with me being what I am, but has a pregnant witch ever found herself unable to transform into her animagus form?" Mandy asked, looking up from the Charms book she was reading.

"I have not been lucky enough to have children myself, nor have I personally known a pregnant animagus, but I have heard of it happening in the earliest stages. Why are you asking?" McGonagall asked.

"Just curiosity. I wanted to make sure I knew everything about the subject. I want everything covered so there are no surprises on my N.E.W.T.s," Mandy said.

"Of course," McGonagall said. Mandy could tell her head of house was suspicious but she breathed a quiet sigh of relief when the elder witch didn't press the issue.

On the 21st, while everyone was out at Hogsmeade, Mandy went to the library to study some of the newer spells McGonagall had set her. Sirius spent the day in the Common Room planning a big prank for later in the year. As Mandy studied, she could see Regulus Black studying at a table not far from her. For a while, they studied in silence, but Mandy eventually found herself needing another book. As she searched the stacks, Regulus got up to return a book. The book Mandy was looking for was in the same section that Regulus's book belonged in. The only problem was that Mandy's book was on the top shelf just out of her reach. She stared up at the book wondering how to get it.

"What's wrong?" Regulus asked.

"Book I need, I can't reach it," Mandy answered, pointing to it.

"Just summon it."

"That's what's wrong with the Wizarding World, you are all lazy. Here's an idea. You're a good six inches taller than me, you get it. Please," Mandy said.

Regulus reached up and grabbed the book. "So you want this book? Advanced Human Transfiguration. Hmm."

"Regulus, just give me the book, please."

Regulus looked at her, but all he saw was that she didn't look like she was up to anything and she was just calmly looking at him. He shrugged and handed her the book.

"Thanks." Mandy tucked it close to her chest and walked away.

Regulus watched her go, feeling more and more confused. There was no way this girl was just naturally nice to everyone. She had to be up to something, but until he caught a whiff of what it was he'd just accept her being nice to him and see if he couldn't get something out of it.

Mandy went back to her table to study and a few hours later, figured she should get back and see Sirius. As she put her books back, she walked past Regulus's table. "Werewolves are only dangerous under the effects of the full moon. The other twenty some days of the month they are as harmless as any other witch or wizard. You may think differently because of your parents' thoughts on the matter, but that is the truth according to nearly every reliable book in this library. I have to tell you that Professor Hunter thinks the same. It'd do well to fix that sentence in your essay." Mandy smiled and walked away. Regulus glared after her but once she was gone, he fixed the essay.

The halls were silent as Mandy made her way to the Common Room and found it empty. She figured Sirius was downstairs waiting for the boys to return, so she headed straight up to her room. Seeing no one there either, Mandy locked and warded her door then set her books down and knelt on the floor. She closed her eyes and concentrated hard on her bear form. Normally to make the switch, she just had to picture herself shifting from a human to a bear, but when that wasn't working she concentrated harder on the small details. The way her snout looked, her stubby little tail, the padded bear paws, the fur layered over itself to keep her warm. That still wasn't working.

Even though McGonagall told her it was possible in the early stages, Mandy felt sure that it would have passed because she was almost into her second trimester. She swallowed the disappointing feeling, got back up, and sat down on her bed unlocking and unwarding the door. She'd have to try again later. If she still couldn't transform, that meant no accompanying Remus on his transformation later that month. This was not good. Mandy stared at her hands and prayed this was only temporary. If it wasn't, then she would have to look through the library to see if she could find anything on a witch losing their powers to transform into an animagus. If she couldn't find anything there she'd have her brother make a trip back to the Hunter home and bring her back all the books there.

When she crawled into bed later that night, her worries about transforming still hadn't left her mind. Mandy knew that worrying about it wouldn't do her any good so she did her best to think about something else. When that wasn't working either Mandy took a deep breath and did as her brother taught her. Jason, worried that something about his parents' jobs would slip from Mandy's mind or mouth when she wasn't fully aware of it, had taught his kid sister Occlumency. The trick, he had told her, was to take slow, deep breaths, and to build up walls. It wasn't to picture your brain as an expansive space with walls around the outside but rather rooms built in a single row. Each door would open to into a room with another door on the far wall. Jason had told her to build up each door and wall so that it was harder and harder to get through. That it wasn't about wiping the mind clear it was about focusing on something else to misdirect someone. Granted Mandy had only been nine when Jason had tried to teach her so that was why it sounded so simple. Mandy had agreed that it was simple in theory but now knew that it was harder in practice.

Before Mandy knew it sunlight was shining on her face and looking around it was already the next morning. The trick must have worked because she felt rested and not quite as worried as she had been. Breakfast passed in short order then they returned to the Common Room to study and lounge as it was a Sunday. Just before the clock stuck noon a thought hit James and he turned to look at Mandy curiously. "How are lessons?" he asked.

"They're all right I guess. I mean, it's not easy, but she's really great when I need the extra help," Mandy answered grinning.

"You're getting extra lessons?" Peter asked.

"From McGonagall, she thinks I need her extra help since I'm not allowed to be in practical classes," Mandy said.

"What are you doing for Lily's birthday?" James asked, changing the subject so suddenly everyone stopped and looked at him. James didn't want to take the chance of Peter asking why Mandy couldn't be in practical lessons and him having to lie again.

"Uh, hadn't thought about it. I think Parker is planning it again this year. You know because—" Mandy said.

"Her birthday's on a Monday," James said, knowing that even though Lily was born on the 30th of January and that was the same night as Mandy's transformation, it wasn't a smart idea to throw a party on a Monday night.

"Hmmm, I guess we could throw it on Saturday, but remember she'd love it better if it was an intimate get together rather than a big blow out. Save that for March or April," Mandy warned. "Play this right and you may score another more romantic date."

"I know, please don't worry about it," James said.

"Are you going to help Parker with the party?" Mandy asked.

"I'm going to see if she'll accept any. You know, I know I used to think Lily was perfect, but with all the time I've been spending with her during our Heads' meetings and business makes me realize that she's just as human as everyone else. Did you know she's allergic to lilies?" James answered.

"I think I told you that a couple months ago," Mandy said.

"I can't explain what makes me see her so differently but—"

"You spent time with her, you got to know her, James. She's a beautifully imperfect person. Love does things to a person. It can hide or excuse even the worst faults in other people."

"I know. That's why I'm trying to spend more time with her and get to know the real her. That way I know her and I will know how true my feelings really are," James said.

"You know, as arrogant and cocky as you can be, at times you're really sweet," Mandy said.

"Hey!" Sirius exclaimed.

"I'm not flirting with him Sirius, drop it," Mandy answered not even looking at Sirius. He rolled his eyes and sighed. Mandy smirked and she and James both laughed. Sirius sighed again.

"Wait a minute, you're going throw Lily her 18th birthday party in one week?" Remus asked.

"James is a Marauder," Mandy blurted, "he can do anything in a week. Besides I'm sure Parker's been planning this for weeks."

Remus nodded accepting the answer.

"So you guys have fun yesterday in Hogsmeade?" Mandy asked.

"It was okay. Not the best because we missed you guys, but we had some fun," James answered.

Mandy nodded then stood and walked to Sirius's chair. She took his hand and tugged on it. "Come for a walk with me?" Mandy said.

"Sure, where to?" Sirius grinned. Mandy rolled her eyes.

"I just want to talk."

"Okay."

They walked for a while until they came to a stop in the Entrance Hall. They sat down on the steps and stared at the door.

"I know it's been nearly four months," Mandy sighed crossing her arms over her chest, "but I need to talk about this."

"I know, I want to apologize again but I think you're sick of hearing it," Sirius said. He knew she was talking about the Halloween Party and hoped this would finally be the end of it.

"I will never forget what you did. You may not have actually slept with her, but you still slept in the same bed with her. I will forgive you for that and I will accept that it happened and I can move past it. I just want you to know that I'm not mad about it anymore. It's over and it will never happen again. I need you to understand that. What we have has to be extremely important."

"It is."

"Please, let me finish. Sirius, if you don't see us working out then let me know now because I can't hold on to something that is just going to fall apart. You mean the world to me and I would nearly bend over backwards to do anything for you. I am willing to die for you Sirius; I expect that you don't screw me over again."

"I am never drinking without you around again."

"I'm not asking you that, Sirius."

"I know, but I love you and I am willing to put my life on the line for you. Please, believe me. I'm not willing to screw up again. I do want this to last like you do and I do want this to mean something. No excuses. No more player attitude."

"Then we're ok. I will never forget it, but I do forgive you for it."

"Thank you," Sirius answered. He cupped his girlfriend's chin and kissed her gently. Though things had been okay between them for a while, it was good to know exactly where Mandy stood on this. "I love you," Sirius said.

Mandy swallowed and looked away. She wasn't sure she was ready to say that to Sirius. Sure she did love him, but admitting it was completely different.

"It's okay. You don't have to say it. I know how you feel," Sirius said.

"But I don't even know how I feel."

"That's ok, I've felt this once before, I know what it is when you feel it."

"Okay," Mandy nodded. They walked back up the stairs hand in hand not speaking but enjoying each other's company.

While they walked Mandy thought about what he had said. Could he really love her? Was it even possible that this boy, one how had been going through girls like towels, actually find love and find it in her? She knew his home life and childhood hadn't been easy and in Mandy's mind he should have stayed extremely far from the L-word but for some reason it was easier for him to say that her; a girl from a warm and loving home. Mandy's parents had loved her and her brother very much and had always tried to make sure that the children knew that. Why was it hard for the girl to show love if she had seen such a great example of it at home? Maybe that was the reason. Maybe she had seen such a perfect example that when she did find love she couldn't recognize it unless it was exactly the same as her parents had shown. Either way she'd have to keep her mind open to the thoughts.

As the next six days passed Mandy watched Sirius and their relationship but couldn't come to a decision on what the cause of her fear was. On that sixth day Remus, Talon, Parker, Lily, Shelly, Tiff, and Mandy were sitting in front of the fire when Sirius and James came in through the portrait hole. "Lily," James said.

"James," Lily said slowly. This seemed a little odd. Peter scrambled in behind them then over to couches as James and Sirius walked over more slowly. Both had their hands behind their back and Lily watched them confused.

"Tada!" James grinned. "Happy Birthday." James produced a birthday cake that was frosted in purple icing.

"James," Lily said shocked.

"Don't you like it?" James asked. "Because I've also got this one if you don't."

Sirius produced a chocolate iced cake from behind his back.

"That one is white cake with chocolate icing and this one is carrot cake with purple icing," James said nervously.

"Say something," Mandy hissed at Lily.

"I love carrot cake with purple icing!" Lily squealed. Lily's mum had always made her carrot cake for her birthday and one year when Lily was about eight she was going through a purple phase she had thrown a tantrum until the icing in the bowl had turned purple. Ever since then, Lily had been hooked. Seconds after James and Sirius set the cakes on the table, Lily grabbed James in a hug and James looked like a deer in the headlights. Mandy motioned for James to hug her back, which he did, and Lily's grin grew. They let go and Lily sat down at the low table and looked at the cake. Mandy grinned and produced 18 candles. A few seconds later, they were lit and they were singing happy birthday to her. Lily blew out the candles then they dished out the cake.

Slowly, one by one, the party goers drifted off to bed and by the end of the night, Lily was curled up on the couch next to James as his arm rested across the back of his couch and they were talking softly. Mandy was perched on Sirius's lap in her over-stuffed chair and they were covertly watching the pair on the couch with interest.

"Hey," Sirius whispered softly. Mandy glanced at him. "Do you think they'll end up together?"

"I think so. They look really sweet together," Mandy agreed.

"And you're not just saying that because he's James and you don't want to bet against him?"

"Nope. Though I shouldn't because we are that close, I can't help but think that maybe it will work out this time. If it doesn't I can always ditch you and date him."

Sirius looked at her in disbelief.

"What? It's true. He's sweet."

"And he's not you're type."

"I love you Mandy, but I'm not in love with you," James said loudly.

"I know, I'm just screwing with his head," Mandy answered. Sirius rolled his eyes and James went back to his conversation with Lily.

The fire eventually died down and when Mandy became incapable of keeping her eyes open and prevent herself from yawning, she suggested they go to bed. The boys shared a look but nodded and wished their girls a good night. Mandy and Lily ascended the stairs with James and Sirius watching them. As they got ready for bed, Mandy asked Lily about her talk with James. "It was nothing really. He was just telling me about his parents and I told him about Petunia and how it used to be between us," Lily said.

"Before you met Snape?" Mandy asked.

"Before he started telling me about magic. She was a good sister."

"I know, and I know how much you miss her. The her that used to be."

"Life's hard right?" Lily asked.

"And getting harder. No matter what happens, you and I will always be sisters," Mandy said.

"I know, thank you."

"So you're giving James another chance?"

"He's been really sweet, and when we were in Hogsmeade last time, I did have fun on that date."

"So another date?"

"Maybe. We do have rounds every couple of nights and now that he's stopped trying so hard and he's talking to me like a normal person."

"Didn't you meet up with him in Hogsmeade last week? Or was that what you were talking about?"

"No, I was talking about the one in October and last week it was a girls' day out. Time without their boyfriends. Did I tell you Tiff's got a boyfriend?"

"No! Who?" Mandy asked in disbelief.

"We don't know. She won't say because he's quite a few years older and she's still only 18, but evidently he's really into her," Lily said.

"Did she say anything else about him?"

"Only that he's tall, dark, and handsome."

"Crackers," Mandy muttered. She was glad the girl was happy but she also wanted to know who this guy was. She didn't want her friend getting hurt by him. Either way she wasn't going to find out that night so she crawled into bed as Lily did the same.

As I said before the traffic stats aren't working so I have no idea if anyone is still reading this. I hate to be one of those people but unless I get three different people leaving comments/reviewing to at the very least say they've read it, I'm not updating until it's fixed and who knows when that will be. Thanks.