The day of Ayla's adoption into the Zelandonii dawned sunny and warm. Ayla sat quietly just outside the cave, enjoying watching the sun rise and thinking her own thoughts. She often rose early, just to be able to enjoy the time alone. She had been there for awhile now and the rest of the cave had already woke to start the new day. The feeling of expectation was palpable in the air and Ayla was more than a little nervous. Jondalar had explained the status she would carry once the adoption ceremony was complete and it weighed heavily on her shoulders. A lot of responsibility came with that much status. Could she live up to it?
Since her first encounter with the Others, she had been told of a great and powerful destiny by just about every one she met who interceded with the spirit world. She was having a hard time explaining that all she wanted was a mate and children to raise. Zelandoni was determined to train her to join her ranks but Ayla kept putting her off. Jondalar had told her a long time ago that Those Who Serve were not allowed to mate according to Zelandonii custom. Ayla would not now, or ever, give up Jondalar. She would be content to learn from the one who held the rank of First among the Zelandonii, but she would not join her. The invitation to be adopted was quite an honor and she had accepted but she didn't know how to gracefully decline the second offer to train with Zelandoni. She truly liked the older woman and didn't want to offend her but she felt she had to draw a line somewhere if she was to have the life she so yearned for.
The new life nestled safely in her womb was just becoming visible to the rest of the cave, though they had known about it for a while now. She patted her stomach, feeling a soft roundness where before there had been flat, hard muscle. She smiled softly to herself, envisioning herself with her new child in her arms and Jondalar right beside her. She wanted it so badly, it was the one thing that had kept her going through all the traveling and uncertainty. She wanted a normal life; a mate, children, a hearth. She wanted Jondalar. She loved him more than life itself, and he would give her all these things and so much more. How could she explain to Zelandoni? She decided she would have to find a way. She was unwilling to give up her dreams now they were so much more attainable. There was only one more thing that she wanted, to make her life complete. Her first born son.
She had been thinking of Durc a lot recently. Her adoption into the Zelandonii made her break from him seem even more final. She thought she had accepted her life without him when she had made the decision to travel home with Jondalar. She knew she would never see him again when she left. Now, he was always in her thoughts, and her dreams. She had been having dreams of him, all grown up, and traveling the same path she had taken since she left the Clan. Every night for the last cycle of the moon, she had dreamed of him. First he had found Baby, then he went to the Mamutoi.
She watched him in her nightly visions, learning the language and learning the ways and traditions of the Others. It warmed her heart to see the family she loved take in her child and help him. She always woke from these dreams with a feeling of peace and well being. She didn't know why her son was in her thoughts so much but it eased the ache that was living without him. Even if it was just her imagination, seeing him alive and well and thriving was a soothing balm to her tortured soul.
She sighed and stood to go back inside. The peace and quiet of dawn had been broken for quite some time now and it was time to make the morning meal. She waved to Marona on her way in, and thought about learning how to make blackberry wine. They had finally gotten around to the lessons promised earlier and Marona had spent the better part of a day showing her how to ferment the juice that was left over after crushing to a pulp the berries that had been collected and dried, then soaked in water to rehydrate them, and draining them. She added a few ingredients, some of which Ayla had never seen. Others she had seen but had not known they could be used for this purpose and then they put it up and waited.
Marona said it would take time to ferment properly and that the secret to making really good wine was in how long you let it 'rest'. She laughingly told her that she didn't know if this batch would even be palatable since they had used berries from last season but they would wait and see. She smiled at the memory of Jondalar's teasing smile when he commented to Marona that she should be glad they had used last years berries or there might not be any left to make the wine with. Marona had laughed at the purplish hue of Ayla's lips, even using the soaked berries, and had to agree..
As Ayla walked through the cave, she smelled the mixed aromas from various hearths' morning preparations. She heard her stomach growl and realized how hungry she was. She hurried to her own hearth to fix herself and Jondalar a morning meal, only to find him already serving out two platters of food from the cooking skin hanging over the fire. He turned when he heard her walk in and smiled at her look of surprise.
"It's not very often that I get to make a meal for you," he said.
"Oh Jondalar, I'm sorry, I just was outside enjoying the morning, thinking about lots of different things and I lost track of the sun. I should have been back long ago," she replied, feeling guilty at not having his meal ready for him.
"Ayla, it's alright. I enjoy getting to do things for you too, once in a while. You always get up before me and have everything ready when I get up. I've almost forgotten how to fend for myself now. I've always enjoyed cooking and I like helping you. Come over here and get your breakfast, I think I can still make an edible meal," he said, genuinely happy that he got to do something for her for a change.
Ayla sat at her place near the fire and gratefully accepted the platter from him. Still feeling a little guilty that he had to make his own breakfast, she guessed that a lifetime of training couldn't be overcome in just a few years. It still seemed strange to her that he would be willing to help her in so many different ways and she was still surprised every time he did something like this.
She enjoyed her meal in silence, still thinking about the differences between the Clan and these people, which made her again think of Durc and what his life would be like if he were here with her. Would the Zelandonii still be so accepting of her if she had brought her son with her? Would they accept Durc too? They had come around rather easily when it came to her, would they be so easy to convince if she had a child of mixed spirits with her? She didn't know and they still had to face the council at the Summer Meeting.
Both Marthona and Zelandoni had warned her that it might be a little difficult for them at first but they thought they would come around. Since Willomar had recovered so quickly from the mountain lion attack, it had cemented her acceptance in the Ninth Cave. They had been willing to accept her even before he had recovered fully but when he suffered no lasting side affects from the mauling, even the people still somewhat reserved around her had softened and tried to get to know her better. She now had made many friends among the Ninth Cave but everybody evaded the mention of the Summer Meeting.
It worried her that she still had try to convince another group of people of something they should be able to see for themselves but apparently, did not. She did not want to spend the rest of her life having to defend the family she had loved and lost. She would not, however, allow anyone to call her son an abomination, or Iza and Creb animals.
Jondalar watched her slowly raise a bite of food to her mouth and pause with it in mid-air. She was so lost in her own thoughts, she was forgetting to eat. He had noticed that she had seemed a little preoccupied lately and she had told him some of what was bothering her but he had a feeling there was more to it than she let on..
"Ayla?" He said, trying to get her attention. When he got no response, he tried again.
"Ayla?" He said a little louder.
"What... Oh sorry, I was just thinking," she said, snapping out of her reverie.
"What were you thinking about? You seemed pretty serious for this early in the morning. Did you dream about Durc again?" The worry was showing in his eyes and she would have preferred to keep it to herself, but he asked...
"Yes, I did. He was talking to Lion Camp, he was actually speaking Mamutoi! It seemed like he was still learning the language but Jondalar, my son was talking! They were telling him about our time there and about how they live differently than the Clan does. He was asking them questions, and they were helping him to try to understand. I saw Mamut and Talut, even Latie! It was so nice to see them again, but then I woke up. Do you think it means something? I think it's just my heart's way of letting me see my son again," she said sadly.
"I don't know Ayla, you could try talking to Zelandoni about it. She may be able to help you interpret your dreams. Is there something else bothering you? You have been awful distracted lately, are you worried about something?" He probed, convinced there was something else bothering her.
"Well, yes, I am a little worried about something. Jondalar, Zelandoni wants me to train with her. She says it will help me control my gifts but she really wants me to join the Zelandonia too. You told me that One Who Serves is not allowed to mate. I don't want to join the Zelandonia if I can't have you as a mate too. How am I supposed to tell her no? I don't want to offend her, after everything she has done for me, for us, but I won't lose you to serve the Mother." The problem she had been struggling with finally spilled out and she couldn't hide the concern in her voice.
"Oh Ayla! Is that what you've been worried about? Why didn't you tell me? I could have relieved your fears a long time ago. You don't have to fully commit yourself to the Mother's service just to train with Zelandoni. A lot of people who have been blessed with certain gifts go to her for help and most of them don't feel a call to Serve. It's better though, if you have a powerful gift, to learn how to use it. That's what she's there for. I'm sure she would love it if you did decide to commit to becoming a Zelandoni but she won't try to force you and she certainly won't be angry with you if you don't want to. She just wants to help you," he said, taking her in his arms.
"Really? She won't be angry? I just want to have our hearth and our children but everyone keeps telling me that I have this great destiny. I don't want all these 'gifts' they keep saying I have, I just want to be your mate and have your babies," she said, pulling back to look at him.
"Oh woman, do you know how happy that makes me? I can't wait until we can have Zelandoni tie the knot and I can't wait for you to have this baby of yours. I will be the happiest man on the Mother's earth when that happens. You don't have to worry Ayla, I wouldn't let anyone take you away from me again, not even Zelandoni." He said, before leaning his head down to kiss her softly on the lips. "I love you and you will be my mate, hopefully very soon."
--
The Ninth Cave had again gathered around the central hearth; this time there was no need to silence them. Everybody was quiet, waiting for the ceremony to begin, and only a few murmurs could be heard. When Joharran stepped up to the front of the expectant crowd, a sudden stillness fell on the people, and a drum started a steady beat in the background.
"People of the Ninth cave of the Zelandonii! We have gathered here tonight to accept a new member into our lives and into our family. It was your choice that this person be allowed to be counted as one of us, to be counted among all the Zelandonii. By adopting her into our cave and into our lives, we make ourselves stronger and we offer her our strength in return. It is not an offer we make lightly, and one must be worthy. By what means has this woman proven her worthiness?" he asked loudly. This part had been rehearsed before the ceremony and this was Marthona's cue.
"She is a skilled Healer!" she said loudly, so everyone could hear. Then it was Folara's turn. "By her gift with animals!" she declared.
Around the room, everybody had their rehearsed lines. "By her gift of the Firestone!" Willomar said.
"By her gift of weapons," Larsolan said. They went on to name all of her accomplishment and gift's she had brought with her. Then Zelandoni stood. This part had not been rehearsed.
"Ayla has many gifts to offer the Ninth Cave, but it her wisdom that is her greatest gift. Through her courage and strength she faced us all and taught us what we should have already learned. In our fear of the unknown we made a tragic error in judgment. Many of us have hated and abused an entire race of people through ignorance and fear. We have taken the judgment of the Mother in our own hands and condemned some of her children as animals simply because they are different. Thanks to this woman, we will no more look at the Clan with unseeing eyes, no more will we abuse their ancient race. The Ninth Cave of the Zelandonii is free of hatred and ignorance for what we did not understand. Thank you Ayla, for making us face our fears and overcome them." When she sat back down, Ayla was not the only one with tears in her eyes.
Joharran stepped back to the front of the group, the powerful, unplanned speech by Zelandonii making him momentarily lose his place.
"What do we have to offer this Woman in return for all she had brought our people?" he said, when he finally found his voice.
"Our family!" a voice cried out.
"Our strength!" said another,
"Our love!"
"Our lives!"
"Ayla of the Mamutoi, the Ninth Cave of the Zelandonii has offered you the honor of our name, the strength of our numbers, the love of our family and our lives to protect you and your children. Is this acceptable to you in return for what you bring?" Joharran said, addressing the woman directly.
"Yes, I accept your promise of honor, love, family and protection and offer myself and all I have in return." Ayla said, her voice a little wobbly from the tears in her eyes.
"Does the Ninth Cave accept this woman and her offer of the same in return?"
"Yes, we accept her!" the cave replied in unison.
"Then may I introduce to you the newest member of the Ninth Cave, Ayla of the Zelandonii!"
--
Durc woke with a feeling of restlessness. He had been with the Mamutoi for half of the moon's cycle now and he was anxious to continue his journey. He lay in his furs contemplating the new and wonderful things he had learned here. They had, of course, shown him all the new wonders that Ayla and Jondalar had brought with them and he was in awe of the woman who was his mother. The fire stone itself had fascinated him and consumed his attention for a full day. By the time he had gone to bed that evening, he had built dozens of small fires and the stone Mamut had given him to take with him on his journey had a small groove already worn in it. He could now strike a bright spark on the first try almost every time.
The spear-thrower had taken a little more practice but he saw the advantages immediately and was quickly becoming adept at using one. He had started construction of his own spear-thrower the day Talut had taken him to the practice field to show him the weapon Jondalar had constructed on the basis of Ayla's sling. Durc own natural ability with the sling helped him learn the new weapon quickly, and like Ayla, his accuracy was deadly. He also had the strength of a full grown man of the Clan but with longer and more supple arms and could cast the spear much farther than many of the Mamutoi men. His combined heritage had given him the strength to match Jondalar's mighty throws and the deadly accuracy of his mother's, making the spear-thrower the ultimate weapon in his hands. It only took him a couple of days of steady practice to quickly outmatch even Talut.
The Lion Camp was beginning to see in him the same awesome power that had shone so brightly in his mother. There was nothing the young man couldn't do. If he didn't already know it, he made sure to learn it quickly. He was already fluent in their language and the use of Clan signs was no longer necessary, though he carried the same strange accent that his mother had. It made more than one member of the camp smile to hear that familiar way of speaking again. Once he had Mamutoi down, he moved on to learning any other languages the people in the camp could teach him. He was picking up Sungaea and the little bit of Sharamudoi that a few members of the Camp still remembered. He even seemed to have Ayla's gift with animals. He had taken to the horses quickly and they to him. After the first spectacular ride with Latie, they went out almost every morning. The first time she let him ride Midnight by himself was a day he would never forget. He and the horse had moved almost as one and Latie was reminded of seeing Ayla on Whinney. The young man and the horse developed a very close relationship after that and Latie again approached Talut and Tulie.
It was the same beautiful woman who was occupying his thoughts right at this moment and as he lay in his furs, he again felt a strange heat spread through his body. He had talked to the Mamut about it and the old man had seemed amused. Durc didn't understand what the man had found so funny, but what he told him had helped him understand himself a little better.
"Durc it is not unusual for a man to have these feelings for a woman. The love that can be between a man and a woman is one of the most complex aspects of our people and it always causes confusion the first time around," Mamut explained. "I know that there is no word for it in the Clan language, but you had strong feelings for your family there right?
"Of course, I cared deeply for my adopted mother but seeing her did not make my heart pound," he said.
Mamut laughed. "No, what you are feeling is not the same as the love between a mother and child, but it is just as strong. In the Clan, emotion rarely plays a part in mating. As long as it's a good, useful match, it is normal to mate someone whom you don't have strong feeling for. With your people, you grow to care about your mate after the ceremony that joins you, hopefully, anyway. Our way is different, we tend to have to love a person, before we decide to mate with them. The feelings you have for Latie are the basis for why people want to spend their lives mated to each other. It is one of the reasons we have our Summer Meetings every year instead of every seven; it gives young men and women a chance to meet new people and maybe find a mate they can love and be happy with. Between a man and a woman it can be a very powerful thing, like the love that's shared by Ayla and Jondalar. The thought of losing each other almost destroyed them both."
"Why? What happened?" Durc asked, not having heard this part of their story.
"Let's just say it was a long winter of mixed signals and misunderstandings. It was painful to watch them hurt so much but it was best to let them work it out themselves. In the end, their love for each other was stronger than their pride and they finally talked out their problems. Love is the most wonderful feeling you will ever experience but it can be the most painful one too. A person can love many other people but sometimes they will meet that one special person that makes their heart beat a little faster. When you find that person, if they feel the same for you, don't let them go. True love is a rare gift from the Mother and should be cherished. Have you told Latie how you feel when you're with her?" Mamut asked, knowing the young man had not.
"No!" Durc said, his eyes wide with fear and again the old man laughed.
"Well, if you don't tell her, how are you supposed to find our if she feels the same thing for you?" Mamut asked him, humor still shining from his eyes.
"She might feel this 'love' too? For me? But, what if she does not? If I tell her I love her, and she does not feel the same for me, then what happens?" Durc asked, worry in his big brown eyes..
"Well, that's where the painful part comes in. Sometimes love is only one sided, and you just have to get over it. But, if this old man is any judge, I don't think you should worry. Tell her Durc, and do it soon."
"What if she does love me too? What happens then?" Durc asked, a small glimmer of hope in his eyes.
"Well, most of the time, two people in love mate."
"But I must leave soon!"
"That is why I said to hurry up and tell her," Mamut said, and smiled.
--
He sat on Midnight's back with Latie in front of him, watching the sun rise over the mountains to the east. It had become their habit to get up early and ride to watch the sunrise together. Today they had chosen to ride together on Midnight and the feel of her warmth pressing back against his body made Durc more than a little flustered. He could smell the lavender she had used in her hair and it kept distracting him. He had been up almost the whole night, planning what he would say to her but now not a single thing came to mind. He knew what was in his heart, but could he ask her to do this? Leave her family and everything she knew to make a long dangerous journey with him? Did she feel the same as he? So far, fear of her answer had kept him silent but the fear of losing her was urging him to speak.
"Latie..." he started, nervousness causing his tongue to stick to the roof of his mouth. She turned at the sound of her name and saw a glimpse of fear in his eyes. Wondering what had caused it, she raised her eyebrows, silently asking him to continue.
"Latie, I need to tell you something. I.. um, I am going to be leaving soon, I must make a long journey. Mamut says it is my destiny to follow the path that the Mother laid for me and find my mother. " He saw a flash of sadness cross her face and it gave him a spark of hope.
"I know, I will miss you. You must do as the Mother wishes, but I wish you didn't have to leave," she said, turning her face back to the rising sun so he wouldn't see the tears in her eyes.
"You could come with me," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. He felt her body start to shake. "Latie, please look at me." He caressed her cheek, gently turning her face to his. She turned her head to him but would not look him in the eye.
"Latie, I want you to come with me. I know we haven't known each other very long but the way I feel when we're together... I don't know, I've never felt like this before. I just know I don't want to leave without you."
She raised her eyes to his,and he finally saw what she had been hiding and caught his breath. The tears shimmering in her eyes were golden in the early morning light and it reminded him of his mother. Uba had told him his mother's eyes had watered when she was sad. "How do you feel Durc?" Latie asked quietly, daring to hope he returned her love for him.
"I don't know how to explain it. When I'm with you, everything is brighter, colors are sharper, it's like I'm seeing everything for the first time and it's beautiful. I feel warm, here," he said, raising her hand to his chest and laying it over his heart.
"Seeing you makes my heart beat faster and when you must leave me, I cannot think of anything but when you will return. I look in your eyes and it's hard to breathe. I don't know... In the Clan, men and women do not show emotion openly. I asked Mamut, he said it is love. All I know is I don't want stop feeling this way. I want you to come with me."
Latie could see his heart in his eyes and could not look away. Her heart soared as he spoke and the tears started again. Seeing the tears, Durc's heart plummeted and fear and doubt returned to his liquid brown eyes. Latie saw this and tried to speak but could not form the words through her tears. Instead, she reached to bring his head to hers and softly touched her lips to his.
Durc's heart started to pound and a slow heat spread in his loins. He had no idea what she was doing but he did not want her to stop. When her lips left his, he raised his head, his eyes still closed. The feelings coursing through his body were brand new and he wanted to explore them. He opened his eyes and saw her watching him.
"What is that? Touching lips?" He asked her, barely able to force the words out loud enough for her to hear them.
"It's called a kiss," Latie told him, seeing the wonder and a new flush of heat on his face.
"Can you do that again?" he asked. Latie smiled and gladly did as she was asked. Turning on the horse's back, she wrapped her arms around his neck and again brought his mouth to hers, this time with a little more pressure. Durc groaned, instinctively pulling her closer. When he felt her lightly flick the tip of her tongue against his lips, he gasped in surprise. Latie pulled back a little and smiled softly at him.
Durc could not get enough, he pulled her back to him and touched his lips to hers. Mimicking her actions, he hesitantly ran his tongue lightly against her lips and she felt his surprise when she opened her mouth to receive him. He slowly explored the heat of her mouth, loving the way she tasted. When she finally ended this wonderful new experience, Durc was breathing hard.
"Why is this done? What does it mean?" He asked, trying to control the rush of emotion. He had dared to hope she loved him too, but he still wasn't sure.
"A kiss is something that a man and a woman do to show how they are feeling. I know it is new for you, did you like it?" She asked, wondering if she had rushed him too fast.
"Yes, I liked it, but what does it mean?" He asked, determined to get the meaning from her.
"Durc, what you said to me... it was the most beautiful thing I have ever heard. I was afraid to tell you how I felt about you. I knew you were leaving and I didn't know how you felt about me. When I heard you ask me to come with you, I couldn't breathe. I wanted you to love me, I wanted to be with you, but I didn't think you would want me to come with you. I love you Durc, more than I ever thought possible. I would go anywhere to be with you. If you must find Ayla, I want to be by your side when you see her for the first time. I want to see Ayla's face when she sees you for the first time. She loves you so much, I want to see her again, and Jondalar too," Latie said, trying to tell him what was in her heart.
"It is a long and dangerous journey and you will have to leave your family behind. Can you do that? I don't want to take you away from everything you love, but I must go. Are you sure you want this?" The concern in his eyes for her touched her heart and only made her love him more.
"It will be hard to leave my family. I love them all but that's what life is about. Deegie left to start her own lodge with her brother, and Ranec is no longer here either. When he and Tricie mated, they left to live in her home camp. This camp reminded him too much of Ayla. Yes, Durc, I want this. I want to be with you," Latie said, surprising herself with her own conviction.
Durc breathed a sigh of relief, then another thought occurred to him. Would the Mamutoi allow it? He knew that Lion Camp had taken in a mixed child, and loved him, but would they allow one of their daughter's to mate one? The thought again made his heart race, this time with fear.
"Will your family allow it?" Durc asked, trepidation in his voice. "I am mixed, Latie. I know what most of the Mamutoi think of people of mixed spirits."
"The Lion Camp loves you as much as I do, of course they will allow it," she said, trying to sound confidant. "Our camp has never been like the rest of the Mamutoi. Now however, even the worst of our people are learning the truth. It may take them a little more time but eventually all of the Mamutoi will accept it. And..." she hinted coyly, "it's not like we are mated or anything."
Durc felt his heart slam in his chest, "You will not mate with me?" he asked, the pain evident in his voice.
Latie instantly felt awful, she had not meant to hurt him. She took his face in her hands. "A woman likes to be asked first," she said softly, looking into his eyes.
Durc felt the weight lift off his chest and again he could breathe. He lowered his eyes and took a deep breath. Raising his face back to hers he asked her, "Latie, will you be my mate? Come with me to find my Mother? Spend your life with me? Will you bear children for my hearth and make me the happiest man alive?"
She smile a beatific smile and said simply, "Yes."
--
They rode back to the camp, content in their decision. Latie dreaded the reaction she knew she would get from her mother and Talut, not to mention the rest of Lion Camp but she knew in her heart that she had made the right choice. She smiled back at Durc and received a glowing smile in return. When the arrived back at camp, they saw that most of the camp had awakened and were already starting the day's activities. Riding double on Midnight, the young couple drew many stares. The people watching them could see a subtle difference in the aura surrounding the couple and many knowing looks were passed around.
They rode Midnight into the surround. The camp watched as Durc dismounted and then helped Latie off as well. Offering his hands to her, feeling the slow lingering contact of their bodies as she slid her way down, only communicated even more the new intimacy of their relationship. Totally unaware of the captive audience, they stared deeply into each other's eyes for a moment longer before parting to release the horse and walk inside.
Mamut watched them approach, seeing the subtle movements of their bodies that said more than words and felt his heart gripped with both elation and a sense of loss. He had already known they would lose at least one member of Lion Camp to Durc's destiny and watching the two young people for the last few days, he had guessed who it would be. Seeing them together only confirmed what the Mother had already shown him but it didn't lessen the sadness of Latie's coming departure. He knew the love between them was real, however, and that made his heart soar with happiness for them both.
"Mamut! You are just the person I wanted to see. I have something I need to tell everybody and I wanted to do it here. Do you think everyone could gather at your hearth tonight?" Latie asked, both excitement and nervousness shining from her eyes.
"Of course, and congratulations, I am very happy for you both, but I will miss you both dearly," Mamut said.
"But, how did you know..." Durc asked, a little confused. Latie stood and stared at the old man, realizing for the first time in her life exactly how powerful he was. She had always heard stories about their Mamut's great gifts but she had never realized how far they could reach.
"The Mother showed me, well not everything, but I knew someone from our camp would go with you. It only took seeing you two together this morning to figure out who it would be. Latie, child, close your mouth. I'm still the same old man who has always loved you and I am happy for you. It is your destiny, as well as Durc's, that you seek. The Great Earth Mother has her plans for you as well, it is both of you that create the bridge between our two peoples. Both of you, and a few others you will meet along the way." With that, the wise old man walked away, leaving the young couple to try to figure out the shadows he wove in his words
The people of the Lion camp gathered at the central hearth, chattering amongst themselves. Latie watched as the people she loved and had grown up with slowly found seats and looked at her expectantly. Taking a deep breath and sending a fleeting smile in Durc's direction she stood and faced the group. Letting her eyes scan the familiar faces she loved so much, she realized this was going to be harder than she thought. She saw Nezzie, Talut, Tulie, and Barzec, Frebec and Fralie, and all of their happy, healthy hearth, including a much happier Crozie that any of them had ever known. She though of Deegie and Ranec, both gone now to start their new lives and took heart from their example. She felt someone move to stand behind her and take her hand and turned to give the man she loved a grateful smile. Turning back, once again facing her family, she told them all the news.
"Thank you all for coming here. I know this is a little strange but I wanted to be the one to tell everybody and this was the only way I could think of." She laughed a little nervously,
"I have something to tell you all and I hope it will make you as happy as it has me. Durc has asked me to be his mate and I have accepted."
The crowd sat silently for a moment, digesting this sudden news, before Nezzie spoke.
"But Latie, he must leave, it is the will of the Mother! He must follow his destiny. You can't ask him to stay here," she said, trying hard not to face the truth she knew in her heart was coming.
Latie looked her mother in the eye and saw the fear in her heart. She felt her chest swell with love for the woman who had given her life and tried to break the news to her gently. She smiled a slow, sad smile and said,
"Yes, he must go and I will go with him."
--
The day of Durc and Latie's mating dawned with a bustle of activity already in progress. Latie nervously fingered the beautiful tunic that Tulie and Nezzie had made. She thought back to a few days ago and wondered how everything had come about so quickly. Telling her mother she was leaving had been the hardest thing she had ever done.
The tears had come quickly to Nezzie's eyes, when she realized what her daughter had just said. Leaving? Latie was leaving! The thought of her daughter traveling for more than a full cycle of the seasons across the sparsely populated, dangerous land filled her with absolute terror. Until she saw the protective way Durc held her. If there was anyone who could protect her, it was Ayla's son. She bowed her head in acceptance but her shoulders shook as she hugged her daughter. Pulling away, she looked at her, seeing her for the young woman she was. A young woman, very capable and very much in love. She smiled a smile full of pride and love but also tinged with sadness.
"You love him that much?" she asked, wanting her to be sure.
"Oh, yes! I do mother, I really do. I want to be with him and help him if I can. I want to see Ayla again, and Jondalar. I have always wanted to go on a journey and now I can go with the man I love. Please be happy for me, I need you to be happy for me," Latie said, her eyes pleading with her mother for understanding.
"I am happy for you but that doesn't mean I won't miss you terribly. Will you return?" Nezzie asked, already knowing the answer but hoping none the less.
Latie looked to Durc, who slowly shook his head. He saw the pain flash quickly across his love's face and hated to hurt her but he didn't think there was any way. Latie returned her gaze to her mother, who had also seen Durc's answer. She had already masked the grief in her eyes by the time her daughter turned to face her again.
"Well then, we will just have to make the next few days memorable, won't we?" She said, turning to her mate. She saw Talut watching her and realized the whole camp was witnessing the drama. Taking their cue from her, they crowded around the young couple, wishing them well and trying to be happy. Latie was a favorite daughter of the camp and it wasn't going to be easy for any of them. Latie didn't see Talut wrap his giant arms around his mate and lead her away, sobbing.
They spent the next few days preparing for their matrimonial. Mamut would be performing it, since they wouldn't be attending the Summer Meeting. Nezzie and Tulie had surprised her with the new tunic, explaining that they had already started it when she had become a woman, anticipating the time when she would take a mate. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen, made of white rabbit and fox fur, similar to the one Ayla made, only much more intricate and in the style of the tunics Mamutoi women wore for their matings.
It was decorated with hundreds of tiny beads made of amber and beautiful, many faceted red and green gems that Talut had found in the walls of a cave a few days travel from their camp. It had taken many, many hours of patient polishing to make the stones shine as if they were alive and even with Ayla's new thread puller, it had taken many moons to sew them all on. They were sewn on in the patterns bestowing the Mothers blessings on their mating and outlined with rich, vibrantly dyed threads of mammoth fur. The tunic did well to show the status of the woman being mated and the irony was not lost on Latie.
No one but her own camp would witness the ceremony and because Durc had nothing to give, her bride price was being waved. She smiled to herself. Before she had met Durc, she had dreamed of the mate she would one day find and had taken pride in the status her position in the high ranking Lion Camp would bestow on whoever it might be. Now she was more than willing to give up all the trappings of rank to be with the man she loved. It was not how she had predicted her life to be but she was happy.
Still lost in thought, she didn't hear anyone approach, so she jumped a bit when strong arms wrapped around her from behind. She turned quickly, putting herself between him and the matrimonial tunic. She still held strongly to the traditions of her people and it was bad luck for Durc to see it before the mating this afternoon. Leading him away from the private section of her hearth, they talked of the upcoming day. "Are you ready?" she asked him.
"I think so. Talut and Barzec have been instructing me on what to expect and my part in the ceremony. I think I have it down now," he answered her, his face blushing a little. "Mamut has also been going over it with me." He would never tell his soon-to-be mate but they had been instructing him on more than just the ceremony to come. Mamut, knowing his Clan background, had also made sure he had a few lessons on how the others behaved in the privacy of their furs. Durc had never had a red foot, his only experience with intercourse had been the Clan version. Remembering Ayla's stories and his own long ago experience, Mamut had thought it wise to make sure Durc had at least a rudimentary knowledge of the way his race shared pleasures.
He didn't have time to line up a woman to teach him, so he brought a red-faced Talut and Barzec to give the young man some verbal instruction. If it hadn't been for the sake of the daughter of his hearth, Talut might have refused but he didn't want Latie to have an unpleasant experience with her brand new mate. Barzec felt compelled to contribute as well, after all , Latie was his mate's heir. They quickly got over their embarrassment, however, when after a few questions, they realized how ignorant of the process Durc truly was. The young man didn't know a thing, other than what he had witnessed the men of the Clan do whenever the need arose. At the men's surprised looks, Durc explained his lack of knowledge, with a hint of bitterness and shame in his gruff voice.
"I have always been told, from the day I learned how to speak, that I was deformed and should never been allowed to live. Broud made sure to remind me daily how ugly I was and that it was a good thing I had a deformed mate lined up for me when I was an infant or I would never have had a woman. He said as ugly and deformed as I was, no man would allow the daughter of his hearth to mate me. I was considered unlucky and I had no status."
"When Broud refused to allow the woman my mother had arranged for me to come live with our cave and be my mate, he knew I could never find another. He had planned, or so Goov told me, to keep me permanently the lowest ranked male. When I became a man, I felt the need, just like all young men do but Broud told the women of the cave they didn't have to respond to any signal I might give. He said he would not force a deformed man's lust on any of them. I would never have tried anyway.
"I cared deeply for most of the people in my cave and they for me but most of the women were like a mother to me and the younger girls my age looked at me with more than a little revulsion. Broud had made sure to remind them everyday of my differences and they were never allowed to see me as normal. I really didn't mind though, I didn't really want them either. I took care of the problems I had in private, though I would never have admitted it to the Clan. Sometimes it was necessary," he finished, unable to look at either man.
Talut looked at the young man's head bowed in shame and felt a great anger at the injustice done to him. He had a few things he would have liked to 'discuss' with this Broud he kept referring to. Durc had suffered so much in his young life, it was time to right a few wrongs. Putting his embarrassment aside, he patiently explained the physical side of love and answered any and all questions he could.
Barzec chimed in every now and again, offering his own advice and together they prepared him as well as they could without the aid of a woman. He may still blunder a bit but he wouldn't out right offend the daughter of the Headman's hearth. Talut grinned, thinking Latie would be more than willing to teach him anything he still might not know. Other than the slight blush on his cheeks, he indicated none of this to the beautiful woman in front of him. They continued talking for a bit, then both headed off to finish last minute preparations.