(At the lake- Ashley)

I watched as all my surroundings were obliterated in a fiery storm. But it was all for naught as I could still feel the immense rage coursing through my body. I don't know why I was always so mad, there were even times that I thought it wasn't mine to begin with. I always felt like the real me was in the back of my mind watching it all even though I was doing it.

I walked over to the lake's edge and stepped into the shallow waters but even the soothing waters were unable to calm the anger in me. I released a mighty shockwave miles out and watched as animals of all kinds floated up to the surface of the lake. And just like all the other times I've gone through these phases it just ended like that. I felt myself come back to stare at the lake and forest behind me. I felt the tears come as looked at the bodies I had killed and the life I had destroyed.

'And here I thought I was actually getting better at controlling these episodes of mine. Silly me, how stupid.' I thought sarcastically.

I started moving the waters so as to retrieve the animals before anyone saw them. Once they were gathered all in a pile I set them all on fire. As I sat back to watch the fire to keep it under control I thought of how these episodes were now getting worst. My thought on it being someone else causing it was really my only one. I knew I shared a connection with someone and I knew I needed to find this person but I was afraid of leaving this place. As much I hated to admit it, and I mean that in the strongest way possible, I actually felt safe here and I enjoyed watching the activities of the Autobots.

I enjoyed watching them fight with the Decepticons on a daily or weekly basis. I enjoyed watching the races they would have with each other. I was also jealous of the times they shared with the other kids. I felt jealous that they could trust them and play with them. There were times I wished I could be with them, laughing and playing along with them. I wanted to be with them when they found a new Minicon. I wanted to be there to comfort them when they lost a Minicon to the Decepticons. I wanted them to give me the same kind of love they show the other kids.

"I can wish the same thing every single day but I should know by now it will never come true."

I looked over to the pile and saw nothing but ash. I stood up and doused the fire and let the ashes disappear into the wind. Once they too were gone I let my final tears fall before walking deep into the forest hoping I would actually be able to sleep for a couple of hours but unbeknownst to me I was being watched and listened to the whole time.

(In the trees- Blurr)

'This is an interesting new development. I certainly wasn't expecting something like that but she does have a good point.'

Once we had felt the shockwave back at the base Scavenger and I had immediately set out to search for the young girl. When I had finally found her I was shocked to silence before reporting to Scavenger about what I had found. He said he would be there momentarily. Once he arrived he too was shocked by what he saw. All of the fits of rage had been small compared to this one.

We watched as she gathered the dead animals from the lake before burning them. As she watched she let her thoughts wonder enough for us to listen to without trying to get through her barriers. We both remembered how Prime had said she missing someone she was connected to and now it made sense. She either had a twin or a bondmate.

It was the only logical thing we could think of. This rage always came out of nowhere. It would explain a lot of the time we had talked to her in the past even though I had yet to do so. One minute she would be all calm and happy then the next she was looking to rip your head off. If this other person was in pain or going through rage themselves then Ashley was only getting the backlash of it all and it made me wonder how much destruction would she be able to do if the rage was just hers.

"We have to take this to Prime. We may need to tell this to everyone Scavenger."

"I agree. Let's head back to base."

(In the base- Optimus)

When Scavenger and Blurr brought their reports of what they had figured out I felt my spark clench painfully. It was obvious now that we something to compare it to. I had seen what happened when one has lost their bondmate and in a war it wasn't as uncommon as you thought. Seeing friends you love go into this unspeakable rage was something you wish you had never seen.

"Are you guys absolutely positive about this? You really think it's necessary to bring her in?"

"We feel like we have no choice Prime. You've seen that she's only been getting worst as time goes by. There may be a time when there is nothing left standing. She either has to learn to keep control of herself during this rage or she needs to learn to block her other half before she finally goes insane."

"And with the way things have been going so far I don't think we have much longer to wait before she finally breaks."

(On the mountain- Rad)

I was probably one of the few that got up this early in the morning. I had another nightmare last night. I know they aren't as bad as Ashley's or even the Autobots, who have sometimes woken us up screaming for friends and comrades I have the feeling are dead. I never say anything to the others because I feel they aren't bad enough to cause concern.

It's always the same one. Of that one time when Megatron was holding me hostage telling the Autobots to hand over their Minicons. I know they would always do it for us but in my nightmares there are times when Optimus has said no and refuse to give them over. It was last night that really got to me. In this one he did give over for once but this time Megatron didn't give me back. He just started squeezing me.

I could still remember the sounds my body made as my bones would break or the sound of my blood curdling scream as I felt my heart explode. I never scream in my dreams or my nightmares. I would always wake in a cold sweat or with tears running down my face. I had woken up at three in the morning but I refused to go back to bed so I planned on heading outside for some fresh air.

I was walking to the entrance when I heard voices the war room. I crept closer to hear Scavenger and Blurr speaking to Optimus. The more I heard the more worried I became. Ashley was in danger. So here I was sitting on the Cliffside waiting for the sun to come up. I knew I should head back to bed or they would all panic once they saw I wasn't there but I wasn't ready to go in. The sun always chased my fears away and I felt I could really use this time.

"Wasn't expecting you to be such a rule breaker Rad."

I jumped up and turned to see Ashley standing there, looking just as tired. I remembered then that Ashley probably hadn't had a good night either. I shrugged my shoulders before turning to sit down again. I patted the spot next to me. I wasn't surprised when she accepted my offer.

"You had that nightmare again didn't you?"

"Yes I did only this time it was different."

"Tell me about it."

So as we sat there waiting for the sunrise I told what had happened in the nightmare. She said nothing while I told my tale. She just nodded her head at certain points. Once I was done we were both quiet but when the first sliver of light appeared she turned to me.

"I think it might be best that you talk to Optimus about this Rad. I know you feel like it isn't important enough but you need to hear it from Optimus that he does love you. That he would be willing to do anything for you. Show it to him that you love and trust him to take care of you, physically and mentally."

I could feel the tears prickling my eyes. She was right. I knew Optimus loved me but it would help if he actually said the words to calm my fears. I wiped them away before they could fall ad nodded to her. I had the feeling it was my turn to help her.

"There is something you should know. Blurr and Scavenger found you last night after your episode. It seems you left your mind open and they were able to look a little deeper then before."

I could see her entire body tense up. I immediately tried to calm her.

"I think you should what I have to say."

She didn't relax completely but she calmed down enough so I could continue.

"They think this connection you have with this other person may be a bondmate or a sibling. They have something similar in their society and they have some ideas which may be able to help you."

She had now adopted a curious look on her face which made me think it safe to continue.

"These bonds they have let them feel someone who is very close to them. There are two bonds that I know of that might relate to you. The first one is a bondmate. Basically it's their soul mate. The way it works they can feel emotion and sense that the other feels. They can send thoughts and feelings to each other through the bond. So when one is hurt the other will their pain as well."

Her eyes widened in recognition. She looked to the sun and got a glazed look in eye. She was searching to see what she could make of her own bond. When the look passed over she turned back to me with a confused look.

"It doesn't feel like that kind of bond. I can love coming from it but it doesn't feel like that kind of love."

"Then you may have the other bond, the twin bond. It's basically the same thing only with different thoughts and feelings. The only different thing is that it may be harder to find your soul mate because the way the Transformers talk about it they refuse to have a bond with anyone else besides their twin."

"They refuse to have a mate at all?"

"Yes that's it exactly. The twins a half of a whole spark and you need to have two whole sparks to be able to bond. Most of the time someone will fall in love with one twin but not the other and so they both refuse to leave their twin behind."

"I think I like this bond better."

"But you do understand right? That means someone is hurting your twin and you're only getting the backlash because she trying to block you from feeling it but failing or you're refusing to block it. Optimus is worried that with the way your episodes are going that sooner or later there won't be anything left surrounding you. He wants to help you control it."

She stared at me for a bit before staring at the sun. I knew she was contemplating whether or not she should trust the Autobots or not. I wish with every bone in my body that she would say yes but before anymore thinking could be done a bunch or shouting near the entrance made us both turn to see the Autobots race out calling my name.

I flinched as Ashley gave me a look of sympathy before getting up and dusting herself off before looking over to the sunrise once more. She turned to give me a nod before warping away. Once she was gone I listened as the Autobots continued their search for me but I didn't feel ready just yet. I felt I needed more time but my time was up when Blurr came up the ledge and saw me.

"Hey guys I found him."

I curled into a little ball as the others ran up the ledge. They were all shouting, asking why I had left the base, why didn't I tell anyone where I was and why was I alone? I listened to them all shout before hearing Optimus ask for silence. Once it was quiet he stared at me before telling everyone to head back into the base so he could talk to me alone. The others weren't happy about it but they obeyed nonetheless.

Once they were gone Optimus lowered himself down so his legs were hanging off the ledge. I scooted over next to him and leaned into him when I felt his large hand curl around me. I felt ashamed that I had made everyone worry but I felt what I had done had been right.

"Is everything alright Rad?"

"I'm fine Prime."

"No you aren't Rad so please don't lie to me."

"I'm not lying. I said I'm fine so I am."

"You never call me Prime unless you're upset about something."

He had me there. But I knew I could be stubborn so I just turned away to sit in silence. But he refused to let me pout because he picked me up and held me against his chest.

"I can't help you unless you tell me. Please tell me what's wrong."

His words hit me hard. I wanted to be stubborn and keep it to myself but I also wanted these nightmares to stop but I still felt they weren't important enough.

"It's nothing you need to be concerned about Optimus."

"They are if it involves you outside the base at three in the morning. Did you have a nightmare?"

I silent for a while before Optimus started rubbing my back and I just nodded my head.

"Do you want to tell me?"

I could feel the tears gathering but I refused to let them fall.

"You have more important things to worry about then some little kid's nightmare Optimus."

"Don't you ever say something like that again Rad."

I looked up at his face at that tone. His look was filled with love and concern. His grip on me tightened.

"I care about you and the other kids very much. The Minicons maybe important to me but know that I will always make time for you and your friends. I love each and every one of you very much. There is nothing I wouldn't do for you. If Ashley were here she would receive the same amount I show you, Alexis, Carlos and Billy."

Hearing those words released all the tears I had kept bottled up and with them came of all my nightmares. Optimus proved to me how much he loved me because he released his grip on me until I was done and asleep in his arms, hoping he would do everything he could to keep the nightmares away. And I knew that Optimus's words had also touched someone else's heart as well.

(In the trees- Ashley)

I could feel the tears coursing down when heard speak those words. He was willing to give me the one thing I had always wanted, even after everything I had done. He was still willing to take me in. I felt like it was finally time to take in his offer that he had made me so many months ago.

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