A/N: For those of you that are reading the Other Side of Fearless, you already know that I'm back. For those of you who aren't...I know it's been forever. I can't really give you a good reason for it. I will say that this story has been on my mind. I can't tell you how much it has bothered me that it is out in the FF world unfinished. I have sat down in front of my computer many times, especially since posting that author's note, to write. I've watched that darn cursor flash at me and I just had no idea what needed to happen next. I woke up yesterday and finally FINALLY knew what needed to happen. And it seemed so obvious, I can't believe it's taken me this long to figure it out. I hope you enjoy it, and I want to thank you so much for sticking with me.

As always, Twilight and all recognizable characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Chapter Thirteen

"Bella!" I looked up and saw Samantha running towards us. "Bella, I need to talk to you. Now." She glanced at me. "Alone."

"Sammy," Bella said, her hand tightening on mine. "I don't know if now is such a good time."

"But I need your help. Please?" Samantha took Bella's hand and tried to drag her away.

I tried to untangle our fingers. "Sam, give me a second, k?" I looked at her and she nodded, stepping back to give us some space. Bella turned to face me and I could see the fight words already brewing on the tip of her tongue. I tilted her head up and kissed her before she could start. I felt her hands fist in my shoulders and it almost felt like she was pushing me away and pulling me closer all at the same time. I smiled against her lips. "Honey, it's okay for you to go with Samantha."

"But what about what we just found out!" she hissed at me. "We have to figure out what to do. We just found out that RJ is James' son for goodness sake."

I kissed her again. "He's not going anywhere. You go with Samantha and come up to my room when you are done. I think she really needs a good friend right now."

Bella sighed. "Why," she started. "Do you always have to be so darn rational."

I shrugged my shoulders and kissed her one last time. Then I turned her shoulders and sent her gently in Samantha's direction. "Thanks Edward!" Samantha said gratefully as she took Bella's hand again and started pulling my girl towards one of the benches that lined the courtyard. I watched for a second and then turned back towards the dorm. I quickly mounted the stairs, hoping Matt would still be in our room.

I really needed to talk to him.

And it would be better without Bella. I walked into our room and saw Matt sitting at the computer. "I need to talk to you," I said without any preamble.

Matt turned to look at me. "About?"

I sat down on my bed and crossed my arms. "RJ. I need you to tell me why you guys don't get along. And everything you know about him."

Matt's eyes narrowed. "Why?"

I barely resisted the urge to growl. "Because I found out something about him today, something that could be potentially dangerous for me and Bella."

"What did you find out?"

"Why are you being so difficult?" I asked a bit harsher then I intended. But geez, I just needed answers. I wanted to ask the questions, not answer them.

Matt shrugged. "Curiousity I guess. I don't like RJ. He has made my life..." his voice faded and he looked down at his hand as it tapped the back of his chair. "Challenging," he finally said. "I guess that word works. He's made my life challenging."

I waited a second, and then sighed. "And his father made my life challenging," I said softly.

Matt's brows lifted. "How do you know his father?"

With a mind of it's own, my right hand went to my left arm and I could feel the scar through my sweatshirt. I knew if Matt was going to tell me his truths, I needed to tell him mine. But besides the Cullens and Bella, I hadn't told anyone about my past. "His dad was my step father," I answered.

Matt's brows lifted even more. "For real?" I nodded. "Man, small world huh?"

"Yeah," I laughed slightly. "Really small."

Matt looked at me for a second, his hand continued tapping his chair. Then he nodded. "The first time RJ came to live with my family, we were both five. I don't really know all the details because I was only five and who talks to a five year old? They told me his mom was sick and until she got better, RJ was going to live with us." He snorted. "Of course, now I know that 'sick' is a synonym for drunk and get better means she has to get out of rehab. But anyway. At first I was excited. I mean, I'm an only child and it sounded like fun. Who wouldn't want a brother?"

I nodded. After being an only child, I loved having siblings.

"But RJ was...," Matt paused as he once again tried to find the right word. His eyes narrowed. "Different. He acted one way around my parents and another when it was just us. He liked to get me in trouble. Stupid shit really. Like Mom would ask me to put my toys away and I would. Then I'd hear her screaming at me because I didn't clean up. I'd go back to my room and all the toys would be dumped out. She didn't listen when I tried to tell her I had cleaned up. Or she'd bake cookies and tell us not to eat them until after dinner or whatever. RJ would sneak some and then leave the crumbs in my room. When my mom found them, she get angry and not let me have any." Matt moved his shoulders. "It sounds so stupid now. Not getting to eat cookies."

"No it doesn't," I said quietly.

"I was so happy when his mom got better and he finally went home. I had my mom and dad back and things went back to normal. But he came back. And he kept coming back. Sometimes for just a few weeks, sometimes for a few months. And every time he came back it got worse. My parents started thinking I was acting out to gain their attention. I tried so many times, especially in those early years to tell them that it wasn't me, it was RJ, but they felt sorry for him and he acted like such a perfect angel when they around that they just didn't believe me. Eventually, they started looking at me differently even when RJ wasn't there. If anything went wrong, they blamed me. I was constantly sent to my room or grounded for things I didn't do."

"I'm sorry," I said when he stopped talking. I could hear the frustration in his voice. I could only imagine how difficult it would be to have someone taking away your parents' trust in you.

"Yeah well." He shrugged again. "My parents are bleeding hearts. I don't blame them for wanting to help. I just wish they wouldn't have forgotten about me in the process." He cleared his throat. "Anyway. When we were nine, RJ's mom finally did enough to get sent to prison for three years. That was tough. Three years of RJ. I mean, you've seen him. You saw him when we first met how he played it all innocent, calling me his brother and all that shit."

I nodded. I remember thinking that RJ didn't seem so bad.

"Trust me. That's all his charade and such a lie. He's a great actor."

"Yeah," I agreed outloud this time. RJ definitely was not the person I thought he was.

"But my parents have never seen it. I guess with RJ, they just see what they want to see. And they totally give him the benefit of the doubt because of all that he's been through." Matt rolled his eyes. "I am sorry about what he did to Bella."

"Not your fault, but thanks," I said. I was looking at Matt in a whole new light now.

"So I told you how RJ made my life challenging. Your turn."

Where to begin? How to begin? I cleared throat and felt my hand squeeze my arm. "My mom married James, RJ's father when I was nine."

"I guess that explains why his mom went off the deep end at that point in time," Matt said with a snort of laughter.

"Yeah," I agreed quietly. I couldn't laugh. Not right now.

"Anyway, he started hitting my mom a few months after they got married."

"Oh man," Matt said, his tone more serious now. "I'm sorry about that."

I moved my shoulders. "I didn't like it. When I was ten, he started hitting me instead."

"Oh man," he repeated, quieter this time.

"When I was seventeen, he killed my mom. Put me in the hospital."

"Oh man," he whispered now. "Geez Edward, you weren't joking when you said he made your life challenging. He made it horror movie."

Somehow a small smile lifted my lips. "Yeah, a horror movie is a good way to describe."

"You said that doctor took you in though, adopted you right?"

I nodded. "Carlisle. Most amazing man you will ever meet. Took me in and his family accepted me right away." I looked him in the eye. "It wasn't like you and RJ. I would never, ever hurt the Cullens."

"I believe you," he said. "And I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"Yeah well. It's good to have facts before you judge. But I did the same thing about you. So I guess we are even."

Matt nodded. "So you said at the pizza place that James died in prison."

"Yes." My hand squeezed my arm tighter.

I watched Matt's eyes dropped to my arm. "The scar," he said. He looked up at me. "Did James push you threw the window?"

A lump grew at the base of my throat making it difficult to talk. "No," I said, my voice hoarse.

I looked up and saw Matt's perplexed look. My hand squeezed tighter and then I released my arm. My hand was shaking as I pushed up my sleeve, revealing the scar. I didn't stop until my sleeve was up past my elbow, the entire length of the scar glaring at me.

"Holy shit," Matt said slowly. "What the hell happened?"

I had to clear my throat again, then swallow hard to talk past the lump. "While awaiting trial, James was released on good behavior."

"No way."

"He came to Forks and found me. When you asked if I had tried to commit suicide, it wasn't that far off. Only, it wasn't my decision. James held Bella and the Cullen's safety over my head and I didn't have a choice. So I cut my own wrist."

"A horror movie man. A no good, low budget horror movie."

A small laugh escaped my lips and I shook my head as I looked up at Matt. "He went back to prison and that's when he overdosed on pills his attorney brought him."

Matt shook his head. "That's insane." He looked at me and tilted his head. "Bella knows, doesn't she."

"Of course."

He nodded.

"Why?"

"Because she's SO protective of you. At first I thought it was because she was the jealous type and I felt sorry for you. But it's not jealousy. That girl would do anything for you. Anything. And if anyone tried to hurt you. Watch out." I looked at him, surprised he had figured that out. Matt laughed. "Come on, it's so amazingly obvious."

Just then our door opened. "Well speak of the devil," Matt said as Bella walked in.

Her brow furrowed as she looked at us. While talking, Matt had moved his chair closer to mine. My sleeve was still pushed way up, the scar I kept hidden completely exposed.

"You okay?" she asked, the worry apparent in her voice. She came up to me and laid her hand on my arm.

Matt burst out laughing. "Told you man."

I smiled and put my arm around Bella as she sat next to me. "What's going on," she asked suspiciously.

"Matt was telling me about RJ. And I told him about James."

"Oh." Bella slid her arm around me waist.

I looked back at Matt. "So now you know the story. I need you to do something for me."

"Anything Edward. After all you went through," he shook his head. "And after the crappy way I acted when I found out you were adopted, I'll do whatever you need."

I was surprised at the change and a part of me wondered if it was too fast. But I needed his answer to one question. "Do you think RJ is dangerous. Should I be worried about him hurting me or Bella."

Bella's arm tightened on my waist. Matt took a breath and blew it out slowly. "I remember RJ talking about his dad. He adored his father. And I remember when he was sixteen. That was the last time he came to live with us. Apparently his mom went back to prison."

"For drunk driving," Bella put in quietly. "Right after RJ saw James in Chicago."

Matt nodded. "RJ told me that he had never been so angry because someone dared to steal his father."

At those words, Bella's protective shield flared. "Did he tell you it was Edward?" Bella burst out. "Did you know James was Edward's step father before Edward told you?"

"No," Matt shook his head emphatically. "RJ never talks to me. He didn't tell me, I promise."

I rubbed Bella's arm. Matt looked at me. "Keep going," I said.

"RJ was so angry at that point. Honestly Edward, Bella," he looked back and forth between the two of us. "I wouldn't trust him. Not at all."

"What are we going to do?" Bella asked.

I shook my head and looked over her shoulder, squinting in the sun light. Matt had left for classes and Bella and I had gone outside. "I don't know."

Bella reached and pushed her hair out of her face. "Do you think RJ will try something?"

"I don't know," I repeated. I looked at her. "But really, what can he do?"

She rolled her eyes. "Honey, his father was a monster. And it doesn't sound like RJ is much better. He could do anything."

"We just have to be careful, I guess. I mean we know he's no good and we know not to trust him. That has to be good for something."

"I suppose. Can we like, call the police or something?"

"And tell them what?"

"I don't know," Bella said, frustration ringing in her voice. "We could get a restraining order or something. Anything! I'm not going to sit here waiting for him to hurt you!"

I pulled Bella to me, holding her to my chest. I wished I could tell her he wouldn't hurt me and that everything was going to be okay. But given everything that had already happened in my lifetime, I just didn't know if I could make that promise. "I think we need a reason for a restraining order."

"He's a threat, isn't that reason?"

"Sweetheart, he hasn't actually tried to hurt either one of us. We don't know if he will. Plus, I really don't think a piece of paper would keep him away."

Bella grunted. "We at least need to talk to Carlisle."

I sighed. I knew we did. Really and truly I knew we needed to talk my father. "He's going to worry so much."

"Edward..."

"I know, I know. It's his job. But Bella, I've given the man so much to worry about, it's ridiculous."

"No, you are ridiculous."

"Hmmm," I said quietly against her hair. "Soon Carlisle is going to regret taking me in."

Bella pulled away from me, shock written all over her face. "Edward Masen I can not believe you just said that."

"I didn't mean it," I said softly. "I just... Sometimes..." I stopped. I had no idea where the words I was thinking were coming from.

"What?" Bella asked, she tilted her head as she looked at me, a line appearing in her forehead. "What are you trying to say?"

I looked over her shoulder and watched the breeze blow through the leaves of the trees in the courtyard. "Nothing," I whispered.

Bella put her hand on my cheek and forced my eyes back to her. For a second, she just looked at me, her thumb lightly rubbing my cheek. Her brown eyes roved my face and I could see her trying to figure out what was going on in my head.

"It's a lot of trouble, isn't it?" my words barely more than a breath. I saw the crease in her forehead deepen. "Taking on an abused kid, trying to love an abused kid. Especially when the past keeps coming back. Is it really worth it?"

I watched her lips moved as she went to speak, but no words came out. Her other hand came up to my face, resting on my other cheek. I saw her swallow hard. "You don't really believe that, do you honey?" she asked me softly. "I know speaking for others is wrong, but I think I can speak for the Cullens when I say that having you, having your love in our lives is pretty much priceless. Their family and my life would not be complete without you."

I reached up to hold her wrists. Her eyes closed and I saw the tears she had been fighting spill down her cheeks. "I just wish I was normal."

"Normal," she said hoarsely. Suddenly, her hands left my cheeks and I found myself in a tight embrace, her tears like hot knives stabbing at my neck. I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her closer to me. Her hands fisted in my hair. She took a ragged breath and pulled away, her hands still in my hair. "How can you think you are not worth it?" She shook my head slightly. "How?"

"Bella, I don't-," I stopped, as I tried to get myself together. "I don't know. I just hate that I have so much baggage and that you have to deal with and that once again I'm going to have to force you and the Cullen's to take on my past. I hate that loving me causes so much worry, so much stress, so much pain. Your lives would have been so much easier if I would have just stayed in Chicago."

Bella was shaking her head and when I stopped talking, she leaned forward, placing her forehead on my mine. When she spoke, her voice was filled with so much raw emotion it pierced all the way to the bottom of my heart. "Loving someone means you worry, sweetheart. It doesn't matter how 'normal' the person is. You are always going to worry. You are always going to feel pain when the person you love feels pains. It's what it means to love another person. Would my life be easier without you? Honey, I don't think so. At all." She backed up slightly, staring into my eyes. Her hands slid down to my shoulders and I tightened my grip on her waist. "I love you so much. What we have so special. I wouldn't trade it for anything. Nothing, no one in the entire world could mean as much to me as you."

"Bella," I murmured. I reached up and gently ran my thumb under her eye, wiping the tears the clung to her lashes. More tears gathered at my touched and I replaced my thumb with my lips, tenderly kissing away the tears. "Don't cry, my love, please." I kissed her cheeks, her eyes again. "I can't bear to see you cry. Please." My lips found her mouth and I kissed her deeply. "I love you so much," I said against her lips. "So much, you have no idea." I kissed again, trying to show her through my kiss, the depth of my emotion.

The kiss slowed, and Bella pressed kisses along my jawline, down my neck and on my shoulder. "Tell me you know you are worth it," she said quietly into my shoulder.

I squeezed my eyes shut. "I'm worth it," I whispered, trying not to stumble over the words. I opened my eyes and ran my fingers through her hair.

But my past was back. And God only knew who it would hurt this time. I could only hope, with everything I had, it wasn't the precious girl I held in my arms.

A/N THANK YOU so much for reading. I hope this chapter was okay. Let me know what you think :o)