In the next days Ianto was struggling. Not just with the crutches and learning how to maneuver around in them while still injured, he struggled with everything. His voice hurt when he used it, it hurt him to stand and hurt him to sit, he had to spend most of his time lying down, it hurt him to watch Jack walk by without even glancing at him, it hurt him to sleep, because nightmares constantly plagued him, but it hurt him to stay awake night after night, avoiding the darkness in his mind.
"Hey Ianto," Tosh sat down on the couch next to him one day,
"Hello Tosh," he replied, while wincing from the pain in his hip.
"Are you ok?" she asked worriedly
"Course I am, why wouldn't I be?" Ianto lied
"Does it still hurt?"
"Sometimes," he admitted,
"Are you getting enough sleep?" she pestered,
"I'm fine Tosh, please just… leave me alone" he snapped. Tosh leaned away in surprise but left him to his thoughts. Another spike of pain traveled up his side and he grit his teeth, wishing the pain would just go away. Someone settled onto the couch next to him and Ianto looked over to see Jack.
"How are you doing?" Jack asked,
"Perfectly fine," Ianto spat out as leg gave a sharp prod of pain.
"You don't look it," Jack told him.
"No shit," Ianto whispered.
"Hey, we're trying to help you. We don't know what you want unless you tell us, ok?" Jack patted him on his shoulder and Ianto shut his eyes tightly as pain blossomed from the wound. "Sorry," Jack whispered.
"Yeah, whatever." Ianto murmured, all of his strength gone.
"I noticed you no longer call me sir," Jack told him, and Ianto frowned, momentarily confused.
"Oh… sorry sir, I must've-"
"No it's fine, you don't have to call me sir, we've worked together long enough." Jack smiled,
"First time you've said that when neither of us are under drugs," Ianto muttered,
"What?" Jack asked,
"What?" Ianto looked at Jack, unaware he had said anything.
"Do you need to sleep?" Ianto opened his mouth to protest before realizing that was exactly what he needed.
"If you can get me sleep without nightmares then sure," Ianto replied tiredly.
"I wish I could but… why don't you tell me about them," Jack shifted so he was facing Ianto more.
"I can't." Ianto looked away,
"Really, you can tell me, it helps sometimes." Jack told him.
"Really, I can't tell you." Ianto replied.
"Do you forget them?" Jack asked,
"Yeah," Ianto lied, "No idea what happened after I wake up," Ianto laughed softly.
"How about you go to sleep in one of the extra rooms, I'm sure there's a room with a bed somewhere."
"Actually there's only one." Ianto informed him,
"What room?"
"Yours." Jack paused for a moment before replying,
"Then you can sleep there,"
"I can't actually. The ladder," Ianto explained when Jack looked confused.
"Oh… well we can move a bed into an extra room, or clear a room out and move something in there for you to sleep on." Ianto nodded his agreement,
"In the meantime I'll make a cup of coffee," shakily Ianto stood up and made his way over to the coffee machine.
"You're magic." Jack called after him.
"The pots mostly full so I'll just set it up and all you'll have to do is press the on button and you'll get coffee," Ianto explained to Jack a few minutes later.
"The room's ready," Tosh announced as she appeared on the stairs Jack helped Ianto to his makeshift room and told him about the way they had the room set up,
"There's a camera watching so if you have nightmares we can wake you up," Jack informed him,
"Thanks," Ianto looked down, embarrassed he needed people to watch him sleep.
"Anyway, I'll let you sleep, we'll be right out there if you need anything,"
"I may be a cripple but I'm not helpless," Ianto muttered after Jack had left. He set his crutches down and collapsed on the bed, soon falling asleep.
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