Disclaimer: none of this is mine... All are property of Stephanie Meyer.

A/N: I'm back, hopefully I'll be able to write regularly. There's no reason on why I was absent this long though, so I'm really sorry for those who keep on waiting for updates. Great applause for my wonderful beta; inkstainedfire. One more thing, I'm really struggling in writing lemons, anyone would like to collaborate with me in writing lemons? I will give you the setting, all you have to do was just write it into story. Please let me know if any of you is interested in helping me. Thank you for all your wonderful reviews... Love you all...

I loved him... God how weird yet light-hearted it made realising that I Loved Edward freaking Cullen. I fucking fell in love with my own abductor who I thought had been fucking abusing me all the time. Not to mention that he freaking twisted my mind, saying that it was fine and oh so normal for him to smack me from time to time. Unfucking believable. I actually fucking loved him. It had been two days since that magical twisted night where I realised that I fucking fell in love with Edward Cullen. It had also been two days since my heart beat like a hammer in my chest and my stomach felt full of butterflies every time Edward was around me. It had also been two fucking agonizing days where for some fucking reason I hadn't been able to tell the man that I actually had fallen in love with him, deep and hard.

After that twisted speech he made about how fucking okay it was to smack my bottom until it was red, toasty and warm, I can't fucking believe that it actually made me see things so clearly. No, I don't really believe that the things that he said were alright, because damn all things to hell, there was no way I would say that it was fine to smack my bottom anytime I'm having a 'Bella' moment. But the thing he said about how deeply devoted he was to simply trying to know me. The things that he did so that he could actually take care of me, that was what made fall in love with him, deeply.

I sighed; still too confused with everything that had been going on in my life these past three weeks. Part of me realised that the only thing that prevented me from saying the words 'I love you' was my pride. Deep down I knew that Edward was right and that all those childish behaviours of mine did need some discipline as I had lacked that kind of thing throughout my childhood. The other part, however, was terrified of not knowing who I was anymore. Would my submission end up with me losing who I was in the end? Would I still be Bella? Who is Bella without 'Bella moments'? And most importantly, how should I react without my emotions? Still, despite all this confusion, I knew without a doubt that Edward Cullen had successfully captured my heart to the fullest.

I was incredibly busy redecorating the new house with Alice that week. It was still so weird for me that I could now so easily do whatever I wanted in decorating the house. Furniture being chosen without having to bother what the price tags were was simply a new world for me. Add to that the fact that I actually enjoyed this shopping stuff. I still felt very guilty though, using this shiny new black credit card (which was stated clearly by the fact that it was black that it had no limit whatsoever), to do all the shopping. I hated the knowledge that it was Edward's money that I was spending, another thing that was only part of him, not me; no matter how wrong most people saw my perspective.

"Bella? Helooooo???" Alice said while waving her hand in front of my face.

I blinked several times before trying to focus my sight towards her. I didn't realise that I was so deep into my own mind and world that I had simply spaced out. We were at the moment sitting and relaxing in front of the television in mine and Edward's room while trying to select which new set of bedding would be appropriate for the guest room in the new house.

"Sorry, I was just thinking," I said, blushing.

"About your feelings and Edward again, I assume?" Alice said, smirking.

It was no secret that Alice was my best friend at the moment. She was just too nice not to become my best friend. She loves me to death, and who was I to deny such love?

"You know Bella, admitting that you do love Edward and actually giving yourself to him does not mean that you are going to lose yourself."

I gaped, though I suppose that it shouldn't surprise anymore how Alice seems to just know everything, but it still made me wonder how she did that, how she knew what was confusing me.

Alice just smiled and sighed. "Did you forgot that I am a woman myself, Bella? I also have the feelings of doubt and confusion that you are having at the moment, though I am luckier than you because I had my whole life to adapt to the situation and try to keep balanced between submitting to them without losing myself in the process. But trust me Bella, you would not lose yourself. Edward loves you too much, we all do, and none of us will let you lose yourself. What we all wanted, especially Edward, was only for you to be better, emotionally and behaviourally. Trust Edward when he said that you did need the smacking sometimes just to simply let go of yourself and help you think clearly."

I just nodded, trying to understand what Alice was trying to tell me. I knew that my pride was the only thing that prevented me from giving my whole self to Edward and yet I still couldn't overcome that feeling.

Night and day came, and without even realising it, my engagement party with Edward was only two weeks ahead. Edward and I have gotten even closer with us talking, relaxing, and just being together like a couple every night when he came home from work.

"Bella? Sweetheart?"

"In here, Edward," I replied from the bathroom where had I just finished my shower. I was just about to change into my clothes when the bathroom door suddenly opened. Standing there was my own personal angel and devil for his features fit perfectly to be both an angel and the devil himself.

He looked at me hungrily and my stomach twisted into a knot with thousands of butterflies floating around.

It still amazed me to no end how such a handsome, fit, and pure sex-god could find me like I was a goddess. My feeling was amplified; it was like my heart was about to jump out of my chest. The words that I kept to myself these past two weeks, the passion that I knew we both shared and everybody who knew us knew, yet, I was so determined in denying it for fear crackled and erupted like lava out of a volcano.

I didn't know nor did I care who made the first move, all that was in my mind was to hold him, claim him, kiss him, and just be one with him.

"I love you, Edward Cullen; I am so in love with you. I can't be without you anymore, please Edward; God, I love you."

I could feel him carry me to the bed and slowly put me down in the middle. He then traced his finger around my collarbone before opening the towel that wrapped my body.

"Oh Bella, you don't know how happy you made me, to hear those words from you. I love you Isabella," he whispered to me, his voice firm, soft, and full of promises. "I swear to you Bella, I will make you live to the fullest even if that's the last thing I have to do."

I felt my eyes tear up, my heart thumping loudly and my whole body burning with desire. My senses were full of him and all I could think of was how I needed him. I looked at his burning gaze that matched with mine, showing me just how much he desired me, loved me and adored me.

"Make love to me Edward..." I murmured.

"My pleasure, my love," he murmured back. His hand slowly grazed my body, lazily tracing my collar bone down to the tip of my breast before slowly and painfully touching the heat of my clitoris.

"God Bella, you're so responsive, so wet."

My mind was overwhelmed; I didn't even realise that I'd tore his shirt, buttons flying everywhere.

"Please Edward, you can tease me later...I-"

"Shhh... I've waited too long for this, let me do this. Let me just adore you, love," he whispered while giving me small kisses starting from the back of my ear down to my neck and my breast.

And adore me he did. He pinched, nibbled and massaged my breasts, kissed and bit everywhere his mouth could reach. I could only surrender my body to him. He then unzipped and pulled down his pants as fast as he could and I greedily looked and touched his dick... his so wonderful dick that I still find it difficult to comprehend how someone could even have a dick that beautiful.

"Lay down love; I want to taste you. Keep your hand behind your head, Isabella, and make sure you do not move it until I said so," Edward said, his breathing hard and deep. That dominant and dark voice was making me even wetter.

"You're wetter; you like it don't you Isabella? To be told what to do? You love to please me don't you sweetheart?" he said.

"Yes... God yes... Ugh... Edward... Please." My mind was incoherent; all I could think of and feel was Edward.

He slowly but surely lowered his head; I could feel his finger tracing circular motions on my clit. I thrashed from side to side, my hand clasped tightly behind my head. I could then feel Edward's tongue slowly licking my clit before he suddenly thrust his three fingers in and out.

"Goddamnit all to hell, fuck!!! Edward!!!" I screamed.

"That's it Bella, scream my name sweetheart, let every – fucking – body know what am I doing to you, what I am about to do to you," he said, his breath fanned directly in front of my clit and that with the vibration of his voice sent me to the edge. I came hard.

My breath was haggard, my body felt like Jell-O the way that only Edward could make me. Never in my life had I known that sex could be this satisfying, this good. Edward slowly came up and kissed me passionately on the mouth. He took my bottom lip, biting and sucking it like a damn lollipop.

"I fucking love you, Bella," he whispered in my ear. I trembled; I could feel his prominent erection on my stomach and it was making me fucking wet again.

"Please Edward, I need you..." and the truth was, I truly needed him. In such a short time Edward has successfully broken my entire wall down, captured my heart and awakened my sexual side like no other could.

"Shit Bella... You sure, baby? I love you so much, Bella, I need you to be really sure with this sweetheart," he said, looking at me intently.

"I love you Edward Cullen; make love to me now before I go crazy, please..." I said to him, desperately. Edward nodded and before I knew it, I could feel him slowly inching his dick inside me. I felt myself stretch, trying to accommodate him.

"God Bella... so tight... warm..." Edward panted. He started slowly, sliding in and out of me, driving me absolutely crazy with the intense feelings of pleasure. Never in my life had I felt this whole, this good when having intercourse with someone. Both of our breaths were hard, deep, and short.

"Edward," my lips chanted his name like a prayer. His was the same, chanting my name over and over, incoherent words was being spilled from both our lips. I held onto his biceps, feeling his muscles contract with each thrust.

"So good" and "Wet" kept on flowing out of his mouth. I could feel my stomach starting to foil, my muscles contracted and Edward knew that I was close. He always knew my body so well, and that thought make me even fuller. I loved this man so much, and God I loved him more for loving me this deep. He was so deep, sliding out and in, kissing, nipping, licking and biting my neck, mouth and breasts. He suddenly brought his thumb to my clit and massaged it vigorously. "Come with me sweetheart, let me feel that pussy of yours massage my cock," and that was my undoing. I screamed, my whole body going rigid and waves of pleasures way more intense than I had ever felt in my entire life came crashing. Edward then thrusted harder and after several more thrusts he came. He collapsed on my body, letting me feel his entire body on top of mine. We lay there for some time; neither words nor movements were made.

"I love you, Edward," I said to him, and his smile was so blindingly beautiful it actually made my heart ache.

"I love you Bella, thank you..." he replied before he slowly moved his body, covered us with sheet and hugged me tightly into his chest. I lay there contently, feeling very satisfied and loved.

Morning came faster than I liked; I slowly opened my eyes feeling and looking at the beautiful face of a man sleeping contently beside me. Both of his arms were still circling me and our feet were still tangled together.

I then remembered last night's activity and felt my blush creeping out. Last night had been phenomenal. Saying the words 'I love you' and acting on them was purely magical when the person you were doing it with was Edward Cullen. I smiled contently; I loved this man so much and was grateful with whatever it was up there that had given me this chance.

Edward slowly opened his eyes and smiled a lazy smile.

"Good morning," his voice was thick and still full of sleep. I beamed, feeling my chest full of love.

"That's a smile I would love to wake up to every morning. I love you Bella," he said before he slowly kissed me, and let's just say that kiss turned out to be the start of something excellent that gave me three orgasms.

The day was passes very slowly when you are in love and the person that you are in love with is at work. I kept on looking at the time, scowling, for it was only two hours ago that Edward had gone to the office.

"Relax Bella, the clock is innocent," Alice said, giggling.

"Umph..." was my smart reply.

"Thank you Bella; I've never see my brother this happy before in his life. This morning, looking at the two of you so in love and happy was truly amazing. You don't know how happy you made my brother by loving him. Thank you..."

I looked at Alice and I already felt like crying. No one had ever thanked me before for simply loving someone.

"No, thank you for choosing me. I never knew that life could be this alive and fulfilling. I love you Alice; thank you for your 'premonition'," I said, chuckling.

Alice beamed at me and soon we were giggling together. Life was good, and it would only be better when I solved another problem that had been nagging me in the back of my mind.

Alice helped to distract my mind from trying to look at the clock countless times. We tried to finish decorating the house again and finalizing the engagement party. I still had to decide whether I wanted to wear my engagement ring before or during the party. Alice said while scoffing that I was ridiculous to think that Edward hadn't gotten the ring yet. I think even my inner thoughts scoffed at me.

Edward came home at approximately five o'clock that day and I literally jumped on him. He laughed heartily while he spun me around before kissing me. We only broke apart thanks to his little pixie sister and brother in law who cleared their throats exaggeratedly with a huge smile on their faces.

"I love you, Bella," Edward said and I could never tire of hearing that.

We ate dinner in full of happiness and both I and Edward just can't stop touching each other. Alice and Jasper kept on giving us silly comments but I could see how happy they actually were with this new development. Night came and with the new physical need between Edward and I, we made love several times again before both of us collapsed exhausted.

"Edward?"

"Yes, sweetheart?" Hearing him calling me those nicknames always warmed my heart; I simply loved the way he called me.

"I truly love you, Edward. You know that, right?" I said and looked at his green eyes.

"I know, Bella, and I believe you. I love you to love."

I nodded, my heart thumping in my chest, half of me was scared not knowing what his reaction will be, but I need this.

"I want to go meet and talk with Mike," I said, closing my eyes, not wanting to see what kind of reaction Edward would show from his eyes. I could feel as his whole body suddenly went rigid. He slowly took several calming breaths before he hugged me tighter to his body.

"I..."

"Shhh...I understand, Bella. I don't like it, but I do," he said before I could even tell him my reasons.

"You do?"

"I trust you, Bella, and I know how good of a person you are. This is just simply you, Bella. I understand. When do you want to meet him?" he asked. I was bewildered, not believing that Edward was actually letting me meet Mike this easy. I thought he was going to be more... I don't even know what his reactions were going to be but surely it was never to be this easy.

"I don't know; this weekend perhaps?"

I could feel Edward's head nodding in my neck. "Okay, we can do that."

"Errrmm... sorry, but did you just say we?" I asked him.

"Yes... I won't bother you nor will I be in the same room with you when you talk to him. But I will come with you sweetheart; I have to, Bella."

"What? Why? What for?"

"Because you are my fiancée, Bella, and I am yours. You are about to face your ex – boyfriend, and despite that he is harmless, I still have to be there to protect you, sweetheart, both your physical self and your emotions."

Typical Edward reaction I thought, always the protector. Yet for once I let him be because I knew that this was not about him thinking that I couldn't take care of myself. This was simply him loving me, taking care of me, and I'd be damned if I let my pride and stubbornness prevent him from showing this to me.

"Okay..." I said.

"Okay?" Edward replied, his turn to be bewildered with my easy submission.

I nodded.

"Okay, I love you, Edward and like Alice said, giving myself to you does not mean that I will lose myself," I smiled.

His face was shocked but then it quickly turned to elation before he suddenly claimed my mouth and once again made me fly for the fifth time that night.

REVIEWW!!!!!!