Hey guys! I apologize for posting so late after my last chapter. It wasn't about lack of inspiration - only lack of time. Second year of uni has taken its toll on my life. Either way, hope you forgive me for my long break and hope you'll enjoy this chapter; the title is inspired by Ross Copperman's song "Holding on and letting go".

CHAPTER 14 – HOLDING ON AND LETTING GO

ELENA's POV

I couldn't believe what I was doing. Had I literally gone mad today? I was in Elijah's car with Rebekah on the back seat getting closer and closer to Rodeo Drive. Yes, that is exactly what Rebekah requested – to go shopping on Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills out of all places. I must say, she did have high-class tastes if she wanted to shop in such an expensive place. But then again, if she could afford it, then I didn't mind. I was actually going to have fun with her, I could feel it.

But I did feel like I was losing my mind. How could I have snuck Rebekah out of that house like that? I simply told Elijah and Jenna that we were going out for a drive and that we would be back in about two hours… They didn't really suspect anything – not kind, naïve Jenna and polite, sincere Elijah. I bet they didn't even imagine that I hadn't told Mr. Salvatore. That was basically lying to him. And if I didn't get back before he came home from his meeting with Stefan, I would basically be fried. I felt my conscious starting to scream at myself, condemning me for basically kidnapping Rebekah. But then again, she had wanted this, didn't she? She had come to me and begged me to go out with her. All in all, I knew that Damon wouldn't give a shit about that. He would blame me and for good reason…

Just as I was parking the car, I realized Rebekah was looking at me through the mirror. She seemed worried about me – an emotion I had never seen on Rebekah's face until now.

"Are you ok?" She reluctantly asked. It took me a second to concentrate on what she said.

"Yeah… Don't worry, I'm fine." I said but then right as I tried to get out of the car I miscalculated the height of the car and hit my head pretty badly against the roof.

"Ow!" I involuntarily squeaked. Reebekah quickly came out of the car and put her hand on my shoulder.

"You're not ok, are you?" She demandingly asked.

"Well, right now, I'm definitely not…" I said and smiled whilst rubbing my head.

"Elena?"

"Yes?" I asked whilst getting out of the car.

"Don't worry, nothing's gonna happen. Dad won't catch us." God, she had figured it out… She was just like her father, wasn't she?

"How do you even know?!" I couldn't help but ask.

"Because you're just a goody-two-shoes. And I know how your mind works…" She said sounding like an old lady. I couldn't help but giggle.

"Fair enough… You are right though, so you get extra points for that." Rebekah looked slightly impatient but was fighting against that feeling.

"Shall we go now? Or are you not feeling well?"

"No, I'm good. Let's go shopping!"

Two hours later, after going through ten different shops and trying on tens of dresses, I was sitting in the VIP changing rooms of xxx. Without even a shadow of a doubt, Rebekah was the most indecisive person ever! Even I couldn't top that and I was pretty indecisive when it came to clothes. I was getting more and more impatient and after seeing another set of 5 dresses getting sent back by her, I completely lost it and took my cell out of my bag. I dialed as quickly as I could, hoping I wasn't too late.

"Yes?" I was so relieved he hadn't pronounced my name.

"Stefan, this is an emergency. Please, whatever you do, don't seem panicked or say my name out loud! I'm begging you…"

"Ok." Stefan said after a short pause.

"I'm sorry for dragging you into this but I need your help. Otherwise Damon will kill me." That seemed to have caught his attention.

"I'm hearing you…" He was clearly with Damon.

"Is he still there with you?"

"Yes."

"Can you keep him busy for another hour and a half?"

"I think so. Why?"

"I took Rebekah out shopping without asking for his approval. And we're running late. And I fear that if he catches us, I'll be jobless tomorrow."

"Hold on a bit…" I'll be right back, Damon.

Oh, come on, Stefan, we're already late with this report. Just fuck them!

It's something important.

Oh… is that your girlfriend?

Just shut up, you prick! After a few seconds I heard a door closing and then Stefan's voice was normal.

"How come you did that Elena?" He seemed upset.

"She wanted me to take her out. And it's the first time in four months that she's asked me a favour. You know what she's like…"

"Yeah, I know what she's like…" He seemed to understand.

"Please help me out, Stefan! I know you hate lying, especially to Damon, but I… I just wanted to bond with her."

"Ok, Elena, don't worry. I'll try to get you two hours."

"Thank you so much, Stefan! I owe you…"

"It's cool. Just don't ever do that again please!"

"Don't worry, I won't…" He closed the phone right after that. I really did owe him…

Just as I felt like screaming because Rebekah couldn't make up her mind I saw her coming out of the changing room carrying the most upset face in the world.

"I'm never going to find a dress for the ball!" She was basically about to start crying. For once in her life, Rebekah seemed desperate. She collapsed to the floor, not caring that I was looking at her with shocked eyes. Before she could say anything I kneeled in front of her holding her hands tightly. She was accepting my proximity, actually welcoming it for the first time.

"Mum was always good at picking out dresses… She knew everything I liked, whatever I felt and when I felt it…" To my shock, Rebekah started weeping. And squeezing my hand harder and harder...

"She was good at everything… We all loved her… I don't understand…" And then she started saying something over and over again but I couldn't make out her message as she had buried her face in my arm.

When I realized what she was saying, a cold shiver went right up my spine, making my skin turn into goose bumps. I grabbed the poor child and tucked her in my arms in the protective way I had always craved to be held. Over and over again, her little speech reminded me of many painful and cold nights when I kept saying the same thing. Over and over again until I would hate myself less and my mother more and more…

Why did she leave me?

The waitress gave us both a huge grin as she put the two glasses full of ice-cream in front of us on the table. I thanked her by smiling back however Rebekah kept avoiding everybody's stare. I couldn't blame her, poor child… After the breakdown she had experienced earlier in the store she didn't even want to get out of the changing room. After a few soothing words and suggestions of getting ice-cream she finally caved. As the waitress left I feared the silence that would come.

"Well, these look delicious don't they?" No answer from her.

"We should probably dig in before they get a chance to melt." Rebekah kept circling her spoon in the ice-cream, not really listening to what I was saying. She was in her own little world.

I didn't even know how to react in her proximity – most of the time she was just a ticking bomb and every time I talked to her I made her explode with anger. In a sense, Rebekah was just like her father, although Damon had never been as mean to me as she had. They both shared one quality though: ice-coldness.

"Rebekah…" I said reaching out and holding her hand in mine. That was when she looked me in the eye. She was confused, sad, angry, hopeless…

"I'm fine." Her voice was shaky but sincere. I was amazed that she could have such a positive tone when talking to me.

"You don't look fine honey…" She wasn't bothered by me calling her honey like the other times. One step at a time I thought.

"I'm not really fine. I'm just…fine." I knew what she meant. My usual armor defending me against Rebekah collapsed and I found myself confessing things to her.

"I know how you feel." She shook her head.

"I don't think you can." I felt my hands fidgeting.

"I lost my mother when I was 10…" Somehow telling Rebekah that phrase didn't bring me as much pain as usual. It might have been because she had gone through something quite similar. That was probably it. Rebekah's face turned into shock and confusion.

"Your mother… died?"

"No. My mother left me." Her expression got even weirder and for a second I thought she was going to come and hug me. Her composure was completely lost and I got the chance to see the face of a true 12-year-old.

"Why did she do that?"

"God knows…" I said and smiled, trying to seem ok with it. She read through me in an instant.

"I'm sorry." Well, that was definitely a first…

"I'm sorry about your mother as well, Rebekah…" I half-expected her to get up and leave but instead she started eating her ice-cream. Thinking about it all, digesting the new piece of information I had given her.

"Have you seen her ever since?" She asked after a minute or so. She seemed really curious about it all.

"No." I didn't hesitate. I felt my face turn into stone.

"Didn't you go after her?" She said, taking a sip of her juice.

"No, I didn't, Rebekah." I said trying to keep her away. But she was quite a smart girl indeed.

"You knew where she was and you never even tried?" Her reply left me with my mouth hanging open. I smiled so as to applaud her.

"There was no point really. She left us all, never wanted to see us anymore."

"Are you sure about that?"

"I'm sure of it. Not even when my father and brother died – not even then did she come searching for me. And she could have found out one way or the other." It was weird hearing those words come out of my mouth. I couldn't believe I was saying them in front of Rebekah of all people. She didn't seem scared; just shocked.

"I never knew Elena… I'm sorry." Her voice was so childish and sincere that for a second I thought I entered a parallel universe.

"For what honey?"

"For asking you about your family that day at breakfast… for pushing you… You clearly didn't want to talk about it but I did it on purpose." It was endearing that she felt sorry about her actions.

" It's fine, Rebekah, you didn't know."

"Still, it was because of me that you had that asthma attack." It was my turn to be surprised.

"How do you…"

"…know? Dad told me." She said as a matter of fact.

"When?! And… why?" I was still confused. She seemed embarrassed.

"Before leaving to London he had a long talk with me. Asking me to be nice with you because you seemed like a really good person; that you genuinely wanted to help us all... And he mentioned the asthma attack."

"Oh…" Damon had surprised me once again.

"Yeah…" She suddenly exhaled as if she had put two and two together.

"I'm sorry for being such a bitch to you…" I thought I couldn't believe my ears. But it was true – Rebekah was there saying those words out loud. She had apologized three times today.

"I thought you were just another slut that was interested in my dad's money and fame. Turns out it wasn't like that." I felt my cheeks go red as she said that. I could understand why she felt that.

"Another…slut?" Emphasis on the 'another' bit… She started laughing.

"Please… My father is the George Clooney of Malibu Beach." That was the weirdest thing I thought I would ever heard from Rebekah. Seeing my surprised face she raised her eyebrows.

"Come on, don't tell me you thought he was a saint." I remembered Damon's words from the beach : Rebekah blames me for her mother's death. Told me I didn't make her mother happy enough, that I was the reason Katherine committed suicide. I can't say she's wrong, my daughter is partly right.

"No, I guess I didn't."

"Trust me, there's not one woman in L.A. who wouldn't give millions just to get in his bed." Her openness startled me and for a second I thought she was the same age as me.

"I'm 12, Elena, but I'm not stupid..."

"I never said or thought you were." Her expression and voice turned glacial.

"I hate them. All of them... On the day of mom's funeral our house was full of my father's and mother's female acquaintances. And even a few weeks after the funeral they kept coming in and checking on us; also checking whether dad was home to cheer him up – he never was, or at least he always instructed Jenna and Elijah to say that he wasn't. In the beginning I thought they were genuinely sorry for my mum's death. But then I realized they all wanted the same thing." She looked away seeming genuinely disgusted by the memories she was reliving. She tightly closed her eyes.

"Dad was too sad and miserable to even realize what was going on. And he blew them all off without really thinking twice. But there was one occasion when one of them succeeded to get in his pants." Again, the way she was talking about Damon made me think she was an ex-girlfriend rather than his 12-year old daughter.

"Rebekah..." Her voice was steady though and she kept on going.

"I hated him for it. So badly... Doing that in my mother's house with a complete stranger who kept calling me Rachel over and over again..." She wrinkled her nose seeming deeply hurt as she was talking, kept looking away.

"I'm sure it didn't mean anything to him, Rebekah. If she was just a random woman..." Why was I even defending him?! For the first time though, she didn't fight with me.

"No..." she said shaking her head. "That was the problem. That it was with a completely random woman. If he had loved her, maybe...but he just stained my mother's memory without hesitating. No matter how bad a person is, you can't just do that one month after your wife dies..." She felt so strongly about this, I could tell. I pitied her, she had grown up way too soon.

"He didn't do it to hurt you, honey." I said trying to comfort her.

"I know... But I still hated him – for five whole months. And I was beginning to get over that episode and forgive him but then..." She stopped there thinking about her words very carefully. She looked me in the eye and her expression turned cold again.

"...he brought you into the house." My heart must have skipped a beat as I heard her saying that.

"And I hated him more for doing that. More than I hated you, Elena." She said in such a nonchalant manner that it was like she was telling me I was the best nanny ever. I was violently taken aback by her words.

"I don't understand... Why did you hate me so much?" Her eyebrows furrowed in an instant.

"You don't know?!" She asked seeming incredulous. A pause came before I asked.

"Know what Rebekah?" This whole thing was freaking me out.

"You're kidding right...? Have you never seen a picture of my mother?...ever?!" Her face was blank.

"No, I haven't." Where was she going with this?

"Oh my God." She uttered. "You've been completely blind then..."

"I don't understand..." I saw Rebekah take out something from her bag – a picture. She handed it over to me seeming both worried and curious about my reaction.

"I think you should see this with your own eyes."

As I took the picture in my hand I smiled seeing the family – it was a very young version of Damon who was holding what-I assume-was-a -baby Rebekah and next to them was... Katherine. Oh my God...

I almost choked as I saw Rebekah's mother. Nothing in the world could have prepared me for this –Rebekah panicked as she saw me fighting for air. I grabbed my bag frantically searching for my inhaler and after I managed to breathe into it I felt more self-conscious than I had ever done. I took the picture in my hand and looked at it again, examining it more carefully. Because despite all odds, I looked very much like Katherine Salvatore...

"Elena!" Rebekah asked me for the fourth time.

After seeing that picture I threw 20 dollars on the table, took Rebekah by the hand and stormed out to the nearest park. We had been sitting on a bench ever since, me with my head in my hands staring at the pavement. For about 20 minutes I might add...

"Elena, stop it, you're freaking me out!" I managed to overcome my emotions and look at her.

"Do you think he knew that I looked like your mother before hiring me?" Rebekah's face was still for a while but then she very confidently answered.

"No. That's impossible. Jenna told me all about your encounter in the kitchen." I was surprised to see how many things Rebekah was aware about. Oh God, I prayed she didn't know anything about the kiss I had shared with Damon.

"Plus, dad wouldn't have done something like that on purpose. He's not a masochist or sadist... He couldn't have known."

"You seem so confident about your words."

"I know my father better than you."

"True." I felt like pulling my hair out.

"It's just... too freaky." I said and looked at the picture of a very young Katherine staring back at me.

"Tell me about it. She was my mother."

"Why do we look alike?" She seemed to have solved that one.

"You don't really. If you look closely she has green eyes – your eyes are dark brown." That was true.

"And you are much taller than my mother as well..." I could clearly see that from the way Damon was holding his wife in his arms. She barely reached his chin.

"Plus, her natural hair colour was blonde. She liked dying it brown sometimes, don't ask me why... but you don't look that much alike! Not when you look closely."

"I agree. But... the rest of our features are so similar..."

"No. That's exactly what I thought as well the first time I saw you..."

"You look alike but only because she was young in that picture. Before she died mother had changed a lot. Look." Another photo magically appeared out of her bag. This one showed such a different woman.

"Wow..." I couldn't help but state but felt sorry for saying it.

"Yeah, mom got really old really early for some reason..." Rebekah sadly said.

"When was this photo taken?" I couldn't help but ask.

"One month before she died."

"Your mother was still beautiful, no matter how badly she had aged..." I sincerely said. There was something about Katherine; maybe it was her seductive cat-like eyes (which I so much lacked) or the gorgeous blonde colour of her hair.

"I thought that as well..." Rebekah added before she put on her mask again. She stated in a dreamy voice.

"I wish she were still alive..." She was staring in the distance. I was about to take her in my arms again and console her when all of a sudden I saw a man running in our direction. Before I could even get up he flashed his giant camera a dozen times capturing both of our shocked faces and blinding us for a few seconds.

My stomach turned upside down as I realized what had just happened. The guy had a sympathetic look on his face when he saw me bewildered and confused and something made him stop and say this one phrase "I'd run really fast if I were you." And then he ran away vanishing into thin air.

It didn't take me long to realize that if one paparazzi had taken photos of us others would do the same thing. I simply took Rebekah by the hand and ran as fast as I could towards the car pushing people in my way and recklessly crossing the streets when I shouldn't really have done that. I had heard stories about Hollywood paparazzi – even one from Caroline – all of them had made my skin turn into goose bumps. Hearing about it was one thing but living it was completely different.

The adrenaline was pumping violently in my veins as I heard voices shouting after us to slow down, to let them take just a picture of us, that they would leave us alone after that. I might have been naïve but I wasn't an idiot. I ignored them rushing through the crowds while Rebekah whined continuously; she never stopped running though. As the car park came into view I heavily exhaled, mentally thinking that we were saved.

Out of the blue though three weird-looking men with cameras blocked our way to the car. I turned around wanting to run back but the other paparazzi had arrived as well and were now taking picture after picture of Rebekah. I took her in my arms protectively covering her face up, not knowing what to do. We were trapped in a circle and I had no idea how to escape. One of the guys came with a microphone next to us asking in a very fake tone of sympathy.

"Miss Salvatore, could you please comment on the ongoing rumors that your mother actually killed herself?" My face turned violent as I heard that jackass ask her that. Rebekah started crying in my arms and I felt like I had screwed up so badly.

"Leaver her alone." I said loud enough for that guy to hear me. He looked at me as if I were crazy.

"And… you are?!"

"The person that's gonna punch you if you don't stop harassing her." The jerk actually started laughing.

"This one actually has some guts…" I was going to reply but another rough-looking man suddenly pulled Rebekah away from me, leaving her completely defenseless in the middle of the gruesome paparazzi hungry for celebrity news.

"Rebekah!" I screamed before another guy immobilized my hands at my back bringing me outside the circle. I couldn't believe this was happening. I felt like dying right then and there.

"That's it honey, give us some good shots." A slimy bastard said.

"Hey, Rebekah, look here sweetie!" Another one shouted.

As she started running towards me the guy with the microphone slightly pushed her back into the circle making her fall on her back and crying out with pain. Hearing her desperate voice and seeing her being harassed by those animals made me lose it completely.

Before I knew it all of my Judo years came back rushing into my veins and my anger made me turn into a monster. Everything that happened next seemed to be in slow motion. Me grabbing the guy who was holding my hands and throwing him over my back on the ground. Me running right into the circle and twisting the camera man's hand so badly that his expensive camera fell on the ground shattering to pieces. Me punching the guy who pushed Rebekah on the ground in the face as hard as I could, clearly breaking his nose in the process. Me getting caught from the back by another paparazzi and hitting him in the forehead with the back of my head making him release me.

After that, the rest of them just ran away scared that I would do the same, or even worse, to them. I scooped Rebekah from the ground, got in the car as soon as possible and drove away without looking back. I felt like I could die right then and there. Because I knew that after this incident Damon would never forgive me…

Rebekah and I slowly came in the living room without being noticed by anyone. Her right elbow was slightly bleeding after being pushed on the ground but apart from that she seemed fine. I couldn't explain how I felt – embarrassed, guilty, ready to pull my hear out for what I had done today. The only thing I could pray was that Damon didn't find out until later so that I could at least think of what I should do next : quit or not quit.

I made Rebekah sit on the comfy sofa and just as I was going to get her some water from the kitchen Damon's icy voice made me freeze with fear.

"So you have come back." I turned around trembling as to what I would see. I tried to keep my face composed as I hoped he hadn't found out.

"Yes."

"I had a very interesting chat with my brother just a few minutes ago, Miss Gilbert." I felt betrayed as I realized Stefan had confessed everything.

"You told him?!" I turned around facing a very embarrassed Stefan. He didn't reply.

"I thought you understood!" My voice was ice-cold.

"He lied." Damon's empty voice brought shivers down my spine. I was speechless.

"Something that you should be very familiar with…" That had stung.

"Don't worry. Even if he hadn't told me, I would've found out eventually." Damon slowly made his way to the big plasma screen and turned it on Channel 7. I saw myself running away with Rebekah chased by paparazzi… I swallowed hard. Damon looked more furious that I had ever seen him.

"As you can see, you're on the news. And not just once – but over and over again." He switched to the 24h News Channel and then to a completely random teen channel. Again and again I could see flashes of me and Rebekah being hunted like ordinary dogs by the hungry paparazzi. I felt dizzy. I had been completely exposed. Not just to Damon but to the entire world. I felt I had to say something.

"Damon, I…" But I was interrupted half-way.

"Hey everybody! How are you? Why the long faces? It's such a beautiful day!" Caroline's squeaky voice emerged out of nowhere. I didn't even turn around to look at her. I was staring into Damon's cold eyes.

"Get rid of her." He simply said and Stefan obeyed. Damon Salvatore wasn't in a laughing mood at all. That's exactly why I couldn't take my eyes off him for one second.

"I'll deal with you later." He looked at me as if I was a worm and then looked at Rebekah in the same ice-cold manner.

"Come on. We are going to have a talk young lady." He instructed. Rebekah seemed more scared than ever and was silently begging me to help her. As Damon was already walking towards the door I suddenly blurted.

"No!" He turned around looking shocked by me addressing him let alone screaming at him.

"Excuse me?" It took me a lot of courage to stand up to my boss but I did.

"You heard what I said." I was definitely crazy today.

"I said we were leaving, Miss Gilbert." Somehow him going back to using my last name was even more humiliating than getting caught.

"I won't let you shout at her. The whole trip, the lying, the hiding – they were all my fault." Rebekah seemed shocked to see me confronting her father.

"You do not get to make decisions anymore when it comes to Rebekah. Or any of my kids for that matter." That stung. And then I felt so much hurt.

"When have I ever made a decision regarding the kids?" My voice was surprisingly sad. That question actually seemed to take him aback.

"You make all the decisions for me. And this, right here, is my decision. Rebekah is scared and she needs to be taken care of. I will do that. That's my job."

"No you won't. I am going to take care of my daughter while you're out making such brilliant decisions…" For a second there I thought that he was going to fire me. But then something miraculous happened.

"She wasn't to blame!" Rebekah simply shrieked making us both jump. "I wanted to go out and made her take me shopping. I guilt-trapped her into saying Yes and she agreed cause she's such a goodie-two-shoes. You can't blame her for something I wanted to do." I couldn't believe my ears. Rebekah of all people was defending me. In front of her father… Damon seemed adamant though.

"Go to your room, Rebekah." Before she could even reply Damon shouted.

"R-i-g-h-t n-o-w!" She seemed so scared that she couldn't do anything but run outside the living room closing the door behind her. Which left me all alone with Damon… I clenched my teeth as I saw the furious glare on his face. I was so getting staked today.

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't fire you." I froze.

"You can do whatever you want." He started laughing.

"You're bullshitting. Big time. I'll tell you something. I don't appreciate bullshiters."

"You can think whatever you want."

"So you're telling me you have no desire to stay?" He seemed confused and taken aback.

"There's no point in me staying any longer if you don't want me here." I said avoiding his gaze. I was being weak but then again I couldn't stand looking him in the eye.

"I should kill you for what you did today to my daughter." Again, such a nonchalant manner of voicing unpleasant thoughts... I ultimately cracked.

"What did I do that was so wrong? I just took Rebekah out. Nothing happened to her!" I thought he was going to strangle me by the way he was staring at me.

"Are you freaking kidding me?! Nothing happened to her?!" Wrong thing to say to an angry father.

"I defended her."

"She shouldn't have needed to be defended in the first place."

"I agree and I apologize for my actions. I shouldn't have hid it from you. But she thought you wouldn't agree to it."

"Damn right I wouldn't have agreed to it! I avoid letting them go out precisely because of what happened today."

"We were just unlucky…"

"Unlucky? Those animals almost broke her hand when they pushed her around."

"I don't think she has any broken bones. She would have said."

"That's not the point ELENA!" He thundered coming towards so fast I thought he was going to slap me. He was pointing his finger at me.

"You shouldn't have let this happen in the first place! You should have told me, you should have asked Elijah to accompany you."

"Elijah? Damon, he's 50 years old. He couldn't have helped us."

"So you're telling me you handled things properly today?"

"I think I did. Not when I lied to you and snuck her out the house. But when I defended her. I didn't let them do anything bad to her, Damon… I protected her as much as I could."

A long pause came as he didn't know what to reply.

"I know you did. I saw you on the news right before you came inside the house. The whole media is talking about you. I'm afraid you'll most definitely be sued by the paparazzi."

"What?" That had come as a true shock.

"You smashed a camera they were filming with, broke a guy's nose and kicked two other guys' asses in the process. I'm sure you'll be sued for attacking them."

"Attacking them? They were attacking us!"

"The law doesn't agree with you on this point."

"Well that's crap! I don't deserve to be sued. I was just defending me and the child I was responsible for."

"I agree. Unfortunately that's what happens in such cases." I was panicking by the second.

"What's going to happen to me?"

"Nothing. Stefan will defend you. You'll probably get off with a big cheque to write to the gossip magazines and some community work. I reckon you haven't committed any felony before today?" He seemed less angry.

"No." My voice was shaking.

"Then you have nothing to worry about. I'll give them the money and you'll do the voluntary work." A long pause came before I could answer.

"Thank you." Damon's eyes turned furious again.

"Oh no. Don't you dare thank me. I'm not doing this for you." He stated in his usual ice-cold voice.

"I'm doing this for Rebekah. Apparently she looks up to you now. And I really don't want to be the bad guy again. You can be her hero." I pitied him.

"She just wanted to escape this house Damon. She feels suffocated! She wants to see the world outside these four walls."

"Wow, thank you so much for the heads up Elena!" He said and sarcastically winked at me. I felt like punching him for being such an arrogant jerk.

"You should be an understanding father..."

"Wow, that's advice coming from you… See, don't get me wrong, Elena. I don't mind being the bad guy in this household. I've always been the bad guy in my family. I will make all the life and death decisions regarding my kids while you're busy worrying about collateral damage. I'll even let Rebekah hate me for it. But at the end of the day, I'll be the one to keep her safe."

"You're being so unfair..." My voice was cracking.

"Really? Little girl thinks she's not treated properly?" Now he was mocking me.

"I'm not talking about me. You can scream at me all you want, you're entitled to that. But you're being unfair to Rebekah."

"So enlighten me. Why am I being unfair to my daughter?"

"Because I know what you'll do to her."

"And what is that?" He said whilst pouring a drink for himself.

"You're gonna have a talk as usual, ground her for disobeying your rules and then you won't be addressing her for a few weeks, make her feel miserable." He turned around to stare me in the eyes.

"What in God's name are you talking about?" He seemed furious again.

"That's what you've done to me in the past month. You've punished me over and over again for not even giving you a chance. I'm really sorry, Damon… Please understand that I…"

"That's enough!" He threw his glass on the floor and as it shattered I genuinely felt fear coursing through my veins. How could I have been so wrong about Damon Salvatore? Right now he seemed an animal compared to the angel I had met on the beach on that magical night.

"You have to leave now." I defiantly stared back at him.

"You're pissing me off, I'm already very angry and you need to leave."

"Is that why you're so upset right now? That I rejected you back in July?! That's why you're taking this whole thing out on me?"

"No, Elena! I'm angry at you because you didn't think! You didn't even think about the consequences of your actions for a second. You put my child in danger and you lied to me about it. And now, we all have to pick up the broken pieces following your mess."

"You have every right to be mad about today. I'm sorry about that. I'll never do it again, I promise."

"Damn right you won't do it again if you want to keep living here. I won't allow anyone to be that reckless when it comes to my children!"

"Reckless?! I took Rebekah out shopping. I didn't say yes to her jumping off a building..."

"Excuse me, have we switched bodies all of a sudden? Cause I'm hearing you raise your voice at me."

"I'll raise my voice if I have to. You're not listening to me Damon!"

"Typical woman…" He said with a smug on his face.

"I'm not even gonna reply to that."

"Good, then you can find the way out yourself."

"For the record, I know how to be a good nanny. How to take care of kids and make them happy. And trust me when I say this, it's getting harder and harder to make them happy without taking them outside. You won't even allow them to go swimming while supervised in the ocean, which is 50 feet away from this house. How are they supposed to grow up and know the world if you keep them in this cage?"

"You have no right to judge the way I behave with my children. If you don't like it, you can resign."

"That's not what I want to do."

"Then what the hell do you want Elena?!"

"I want you to stop acting like a hurt little child and get over the fact that I can't be with you."

"Get your ass out that door until I throw you on my shoulder and carry you out myself."

"No. You can't just shut people out when you don't like what they're saying."

"You've already disappointed me enough today, Miss Gilbert. I'm warning you…" His arrogant sarcastic voice was the last straw. There's only so much humiliation that a woman can take.

I found myself doing something I would've never thought of doing. I felt my right hand curl into a fist and then I just wanted to hit Damon in the face – punch him as hard as I could – for everything that he had said, for being such a jerk to me in the past month, for kissing me in the first place. And then, just as anger blinded me, I felt my hand being caught right before it hit his face. His grip was so brutal that I felt a tear involuntarily come down my cheek after a few seconds. I wasn't angry or upset anymore. I was simply hyperventilating. I felt utter fear as I saw him slowly closing the distance between our faces. We looked at each other's lips for a split second and then made eye contact. What I saw in his eyes made me feel so ashamed of how I was acting.

"Don't ever do that again."

He was right there – in all his glory next to the most beautiful woman at the party – Andie Star. They looked so good together – a match made in heaven for all I knew. I turned around right before Damon Salvatore could spot me. I wasn't in the mood to pretend or lie. I had had enough of that. For the past month since the paparazzi incident that had been all I had done – pretended to be happy; to want to be in that household; to accept the fact that he would never forgive me for that day. I didn't know why he hadn't fired me. It would've been easier for both of us. But he probably thought that firing me was the easy way out for me. He had wanted to torture me. Continuosly…

And tortured me he did. Let's see – what did he do first? Ah, yes, I remember. He denied me the right to talk to any of his children in private anymore – Jenna or Elijah were supposed to be with me all the time, watching my every move and step. This way I wouldn't be tempted to deceive him and run away with his kids anymore. Second of all, he stopped looking at me. Not talking to me – but looking at me; made me feel like an unworthy being. Third – he never showed up at my court hearing. As he had said, I was called to court where Stefan defended me against the paparazzi I had beaten up. Damon was supposed to be a key witness in my favor. He never showed up…

The last dreadful thing he had done was to make me attend his glamorous 20's themed party that was organized in the backyard. The kids were sleeping upstairs while I had to sit down here surrounded by complete strangers and feeling awkward in the dress he had ordered me to wear tonight. Well, he hadn't exactly ordered but sending Caroline with a gorgeous white dress together with a perfect set of accessories, meant the same thing to me. So here I was getting humiliated by him again – but being unable to do anything about it. After all, I had signed a 12-month contract and he wouldn't let me quit anyway.

A very recent pop song crept into the music list and all of a sudden I felt like I was in a movie. I was staring at my boss who was on the other side of the swimming pool.

Is anybody out there?

His gorgeous grey eyes made contact with mine.

Is anybody listening?

He had truly listened to me that night on the beach. But since then he hadn't listened at all.

Does anybody really know it's the end of the beginning?

It truly felt like the end to us. Whatever we had had going on for the past five months was obviously coming to an end. I should have felt relief – I had never wanted to be with him since it would have complicated everything. I should have been happy for him. Andie seemed like a really good partner for him. But somehow, no matter how badly I tried to hide it, my feelings came out and then I realized.

It's everything you wanted. It's everything you don't.

Damon represented everything I wanted and everything I didn't.

It's one door swinging open and one door swinging closed.

Mason had been the door swinging closed. But Damon could have been the door swinging open for me.

Some prayers find an answer, some prayers never know

Ross Copperman was so right… Some prayers never did find an answer…

We're holding on and letting go…

DAMON's POV

I had invited more than 300 guests to this party. There were some people that I didn't even know had come. So many connections, so many people from the law firm. So many ass lickers and gold diggers that I felt I was going to be sick. I had entertained all of them. Well, almost all of them.

Elena was standing on the other side of the pool staring intently in my eyes. I was having a legal chat with Alaric Saltzman, my other best friend apart from Klaus. Normally I would've engaged in this conversation giving 100%. But since Alaric was already tipsy I couldn't be bothered to even pretend I was listening. My only concern was the beautiful girl who was begging me to forgive her. I could see it in her eyes. In her gestures. She wanted to come and talk to me but she didn't have the courage to.

How could she? I had ignored her the entire night. Even though I had wanted to tell her so badly how beautiful she looked in the dress I had picked for her. That dress. God… How humiliated she must have felt upon receiving the package from Caroline of all people. An enthusiastic Caroline who probably didn't even let her object to this whole charade… I had treated Elena like scum for the past months and I hadn't even apologized once. I started to think that Rebekah had been right. That I was the only reason Katherine had killed herself. It would explain what I was doing now – torturing Elena like this.

And the only reason I was doing that was because she had rejected me. She had been right; but no way in hell was I going to admit it in front of her. My stupid pride had always got the best of me… always made me flawed. That was what I had always heard from my father. No matter how hard it was to accept, he had been right all along – my pride would eventually be the death of me.

ELENA's POV

I slowly made my way inside the house since I couldn't take it anymore being out there. I deeply inhaled and exhaled. It was too much for me – this whole charade. First thing in the morning I would leave. There was nothing more for me to do here. Contract or no contract – I couldn't stand being next to him anymore; not when he paraded his girlfriend like that in front of me and making me watch as well.

I suddenly realized that the living room light was on. I made my way to the door curious to see who was inside. I was surprised to see a man with his back turned to me, admiring the painting of Damon's four kids. I felt like talking to someone who wasn't outside so I simply said in a sincere voice.

"Beautiful isn't it?" As he heard my voice, the mystery man turned around to look me in the eye.

I felt like I had stepped back in time when I saw his green eyes, cocky smile, confident posture.

There was really nothing different about him…but I still couldn't believe it.

Mason was standing right in front of me looking more dangerous and cunning than ever before…

I hope you guys like it! The next chapter is going to be legendary - I promise you. Many secrets will be revealed... So what did you think of this chapter? Please review...