We build a big fire that night. Tomorrow morning, we'll be at the Citadel Ruins. We could have very well reached it tonight, but Dizzy said she wanted to wait. I don't know why, but she does. I told her shelter was at the ruins, but she didn't want to hear it. It was almost as if she was scared of something. But, I didn't bother to pry. Instead, I made a fire, cooked some food, and when all was said and done, let Dizzy open the fresh bottle she obtained earlier.

"This is…so fun, you know that?"

She tells me, before taking a quick shot of the liquor. I smile at her, and look at the bloodstain on her side. I don't know why, but it makes me angry and sad at the same time. Dizzy catches me looking at it, and her smile disappears.

"I'm alright, you know. There's no more wound."

Reaching towards her, I feel the dryness of the stain. I frown at her, wishing I could have prevented it altogether.

"I know…it's just…"

"It's alright, really. Don't worry."

Dizzy sits beside me, her head against my shoulder. I cradle my injured arm, looking down at her. She takes a bigger sip of the whiskey, and I take it from her.

"Sharing is caring, little sister."

I tell her, taking an equally as large gulp.

"Hey, Cain?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't call me that."

"What?"

"Don't call me 'little sister' anymore. It bothers me."

I stare at her as her hands reaches for the bottle. Putting my good arm around her, my hand strokes the dried bloodstain. I wish there was a way, for me to keep her perfect. For me to never let harm touch her. I think these thoughts, are just the booze talking.

"Why? I've always called you that."

Lifting her head, her eyes meet mine as the bottle meets her lips. I think, for both of us, that bottle is going to give us liquid courage to say things, we could never say sober. Shrugging as she puts the bottle down, Dizzy puts her head in my lap, and lays over me. In the light of the fire, I can't take my eyes off of her. The shadows of the flames dance around her body, illuminating it, making it that much more perfect. If there ever was a more perfect.

"Because I don't want to see you as my brother right now."

"Huh?"

Reaching for my hand, she takes it, and holds it close to her face.

"You're the only thing I really like about myself."

"Diz, there's a lot to like about you."

"Yeah?"

"Well, that boy you're interested in seems to think so."

The mischievous smirk fades from her face. Looking away from me, she stares into the fire. Still holding my hand, Dizzy sighs and shakes her head. Her fingers play with mine, and I think the liquor is starting to hit her. Her face becomes more relaxed, more open. Her blue eyes, shine like they never have before.

"…Sometimes… I think people like the idea of me, rather than me."

Her tone is sad, lost and hopeless. I turn her face to meet mine. I want to look at her while I talk. The whiskey, is working its own magic on myself. Taking the bottle, I gulp down another shot to help myself with words.

"What do you mean?"

I ask her, hoping to urge her into the conversation. Maybe then, with help of the whiskey, I can say what I've always wanted to say. Then, tomorrow, if things are bad, I can blame the whiskey.

"I think people like the idea of me. You know. Daughter of the two most famed people in the Wasteland. Even if I didn't know it, they did. And because of that, they must think I'm some badass femme fatale, like mom is. But I'm really not. I'm just a stupid kid who doesn't know any better. Then they get to know me, and realize…I'm nothing what they thought. And then, they don't like me anymore."

"If this boy doesn't like you for who you are, then he isn't worth it."

"That's easier to say than do, isn't it? It's easy for you to walk away from emotions. You're just like dad. You never say what you're really feeling, and keep it all inside."

Raising an eyebrow, I take one last sip as the effect take hold on me. Putting the cap on the bottle, I set it down. Dizzy is right, though. I never really say what I'm feeling, especially with her. Instead I do keep it inside, in hopes it'll all go away.

"Are you talking about Erica?"

I say, confronting her. Dizzy nods, not saying anything. I smooth her short, choppy, dark brown hair with my palm, and smile at her as she lays in my lap. Her big eyes stare back up at me, and a breeze makes the fire smoke blow in our faces. We hold our breaths, trying not to inhale it and make a coughing fit. As soon as the wind changes, we take deep breaths in. Feeling her back extend over my lap, sort of excites me. But like Dizzy says, I hold it all inside.

"Erica and I didn't get together, Dizzy. We're not together right now. In the past, we were. But I didn't take her back. She didn't even ask to be taken back."

"But you love her, right?"

"No, I don't. I…don't really love anyone."

"Except me?"

"Yeah. Except you."

Getting up, Dizzy makes me dizzy. In my mind, I laugh at the statement. She stumbles around the fire, and I grow a bit concerned.

"Hey, careful."

She laughs at me, and from across the fire, begins to sway her hips.

"I want to dance…"

Closing her eyes, she sighs, and it's the most beautiful sight I've ever seen half-drunk in my entire life. Stupidly, I smile at her as I feel the full effects of the whiskey. It's stronger, but then again, it's also been a while since I drank.

"What are you dancing for, Diz? You can't dance for no reason."

Thinking about what I said, Dizzy puts a playful finger on her chin. The straps that hold her top around her neck look like they're about to break, as she takes a deep breath in.

"For you. And…for realizing all men, except you, are useless."

"Oh, really? What about if you fall in love?"

"Who needs that? I have you, remember?"

Smiling at her, I feel a bit egotistical. Laughing, Dizzy stumbles over her own feet. All around, tonight is a relatively good night. We're laughing, having fun, enjoying ourselves. Innocent fun, with the inclusion of liquor. She laughs, and I laugh in return. Her balance is off, her speech slightly slurred, and I raise the bottle of whiskey to her.

"Dance to…to us!"

I say, and Dizzy laughs even harder. You know, no one ever really laughs, like she does. It lights up the clear night sky, and reminds me of sun. She has a wide, white, toothy smile. With her high cheekbones, whenever she smiles, her eyes are forced to slits. It makes her button nose crinkle, and a tidbit only I know, is that when she really wants to, she can wiggle her ears. The strap around her neck, the one that holds up her shirt, or lack thereof, moves with her neck when she laughs.

"Do you like my dancing?"

Dizzy asks, pretending to be shy.

"That I do, miss. That I do."

Without further complications, Dizzy begins to dance to a beautiful beat. I can't hear it, only she can, but I can see it. See it, as her bare hips bounce and move. Her arms, creating magic in the air, while her legs do complicated footwork to keep it all in sync. She moves against the flames of the fire, almost, in opposing rhythm to them. It's beautiful, erotic, like nothing I've ever seen before. Not in the saloon with its dancers, or in the Brass Lantern with its entertainment. Maybe it's because I've stayed in Megaton so long, but, I think Dizzy and the way she moves, is the most beautiful thing in the world.

As the flames lick at the night sky, her arms reach up, and her fingertips seem to touch the stars. Out here, with our parents blessings, we are free. Free to travel to the moon, free to fly together, and free to do whatever it is we please. I see this, all of this freedom, inside of Dizzy's trace-like dance. Her eyes, against her body's movements, stay focused on me. As she turns, showing me the small of her back, I hear the fire cracking, as her feet hit the ground in perfect rhythm. The stars…don't shine nearly as brightly, as she does.

Beads of sweat form on her body, and I notice it makes her look like she's shimmering. With the bottle of whiskey clenched in my hand, I take another sip. I can't explain, the emotions and feelings running through me, as I watch her move. Her face turns pink, with excitement at her own steps. I want to hear the beat she has in her head, so badly. I want to know what it is, that drives her to be so passionate about something. I never want her to stop, but…she does. She stops, and stares at me, sweaty and breathless. Her cheeks are reddish, and she licks her lips.

"Did you like it? I danced."

I smile at her, and outstretch my arms.

"I liked it this much."

Dizzy laughs, and walks over to me. She falls into my lap, her fingers grazing my bandaged arm. Staring up at me, as her chest moves up and down, Dizzy smiles.

"You know what?"

"What?"

I reply to her, and it feels like she's telling me a beautiful secret.

"Mom says that one day, the entire land will be green, like Megaton is."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. She told me once, when I was really little, that there'll be gardens all over the desert. That one day, there's going to be grass and flowers as far as the eye can see."

Putting the bottle down, I realize how possible that is. But, I may never be able to see that. I may never, be able to share in that excitement, that Dizzy holds so dear to her.

"When it happens, you'll be there, right?"

The smile fades from my face. She reads my mind, without even knowing it. I won't be there, to see the Capital Wasteland fertile and green as so many people want it to be. I won't be there, to hold her hand, and watch as the land we were raised in changes. Tears form in my eyes, as Dizzy stares at me, still hopeful. I'd give anything, to live half as long as she will.

"…Yeah…I'll be there."

What'll happen, when she finds out the truth? What'll become of us? Dizzy trusts me. I'm the only person she has to confide in. So…what will she say, when she finds out I'm lying to her?

"Tomorrow, we'll go to the Citadel Ruins. We'll swim in the river, and we'll have lots of fun. Won't we?"

Her cheeriness sounds forced, as the tears in my eyes grow. I notice, Dizzy is crying, too. Does she know the truth? Impossible. There's no way she could have figured it out on her own, and yet…here she is, feeling just as sad as I am. What happened to our happiness? What we were feeling just moments before?

"Yeah…we'll have all the fun in the world."

"And then…a hundred years from now, we'll still be here, right?"

"Yeah, we'll still be here, and this place, will be our place."

She sniffs, holding back tears, holding back sobs. I'm doing just the same. I didn't come here, to lie to her. I didn't come here, to deceive and keep things from her. I came here, to spend time with her. To show her how much she meant to me. Is it possible, that I can do both at the same time? Will I be capable, of loving her and keeping myself at a safe distance?

"…Tell me, in the end, everything will be alright."

She begs me, the source of her sadness unknown to me. Wrapping her head in my arms, I look up at the sky. Some people, they believe in an ultimate being. A God of sorts. The Son of Atom, whatever you want to call it. And I want to know, if there is someone up there, what does he want from me? What pleasure, does he get, by allowing me to feel this way, and knowing there's nothing I can possibly do about it?

"Yeah. Everything…everything is going to be alright."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

No amount of liquor, can shake the feelings of despair that plague me and Dizzy. It's as if we both know the truth, but neither want to admit to it. Looking back down at her, I brush her eyebrow with my thumb. Tears fall from the outer corners of her eyes, and I smirk down, forcing it.

"Why are you crying, Diz?"

"I don't know…I guess I'm just crazy, huh?"

"That makes two of us."

She reaches up, and strokes my face with her hand. Her hand, is smooth and soft. It doesn't know, the efforts of work. She has no idea, what'll happen to her perfect skin if she stays out here. With time, and fights, she'll grow hard and calloused. She'll have more scars than she can imagine, inside and out. Even though being out here brings her joy, I don't want her to go through it all alone. I don't want her to have to fight Super Mutants or Raiders, without me there beside her.

"Diz?"

"Yeah?"

My hand moves to the dried bloodstain on her side. I feel her skin against my lower palm, and her ribs beneath the Brahmin-like fabric of her shirt.

"If you stay out here, this scar…will be one of the lesser injuries. You're going to get hurt, badly. Just like mom did."

"But mom had dad, right? She had dad, when she was out here."

"She did…"

"And I have…I have you so, it'll be alright."

"Yeah, it will be."

I feel her fingers tangling in my hair, and she smiles.

"I wish…people would tell me the truth, you know. I wish…somehow, there was a way for everything to be okay. But there isn't. And I know that. I just don't want to accept it."

I don't think, after the Great War, there's room inside Heaven or Hell, for people like me and Dizzy. I think instead, we're going to end up in limbo. I can smell the liquor on her breath, as I let my face get close to hers.

"There's nothing to cry about, Diz."

I whisper in her ear, nuzzling my face against hers.

"There's everything, to cry about, Cain."

I don't know what she means, but the warmth of her face against mine, as I hold her in my lap, erases all my worries. It erases all my concerns of the world. There's no words I have to offer, that'll comfort her, and work.

"Cain?"

Her hot breath bounces off my cheek, and a shudder crawls up my spine. If I was sober, I'd never let myself get so close to her. But at least, I can blame the liquor, if nothing else.

"Yeah?"

"Will you kiss me again, like you did before?"

I pull away from her, her eyes glossy with tears.

"…You…want me to?"

Nervous, she bites her lip, and nods.

"Is that wrong?"

Shaking my head, I feel strands of my hair brushing against my forehead. The fire that warms us, is like ice compared to the heat of Dizzy's lips against mine. I kiss her, as her nails gently scratch my head, as she holds on to my hair for dear life. My mind is empty, and I feel nothing except for her warmth, and the urges being fulfilled. She tastes like stale cigarettes, sweetrolls, and a trace of whiskey.

As the kiss ends, I can't help but want more. I open my eyes, and Dizzy opens hers. She takes in a deep breath, and stares at me. I don't know what to say, so I kiss her again. Her arms fall around my shoulders, and I can't even feel how cold the breeze is. If anyone sees us out here, they're just going to think we're some star-crossed lovers, wandering the Wasteland in search of the homeland. They'd never know, that we were raised together. That Dizzy and I, are closely related. No one out here, would judge us. They'd never berate us, or call us freaks. Instead, out here, we'd be accepted. I think perhaps, out here, is the only place, for people like us.

Dizzy takes in a deep breath of air, as she climbs to straddle me. I don't want to…want her to think that this is sexual. Of course, there's lust but…but kissing her is more than enough for me. My father, he said that in pre-war times, people would talk about the final judgment. That when people die, they're taken before Death and God and other patrons and saints, and judged on where to go. I wonder, if kissing Dizzy, is worth spending an eternity in hell? Feeling her warmth, though, I think it is. I think, right now if I died, it wouldn't matter much to me because I was able to do this so openly. My hands are firmly on her hips, while she holds on to my shoulders. I feel her lift a hand, and brush hair from my forehead. Opening my eyes, I see the moon behind her. She pulls away, her face heated with…passion, I suppose. Stupidly I smile at her.

"What's so funny?"

She asks me, as I rest my head on her chest, wrapping my arms around her back.

"Nothing. I'm just…smiling."

Her hands fall from my body, as she shoves them into her pockets. I kiss her collarbone, simply because it's there.

"Cain?"

"Hmhm?"

She puts her hands back around my shoulders, and I look up at her as she lifts herself up with her thighs.

"…Tell me everything will be alright?"

Curiously, I look up at her. Her eyes, once again, are filled with tears. It confuses me, and I feel something sharp in her hand, scraping against my neck.

"Dizzy…what're you doing?"

"I never wanted to see you unhappy, you know. And I thought you wanted the same thing for me…"

I go to grab her wrist, but I'm too late. She stabs me, with something small, sharp, and something injects inside of me. Toppling off of me, Dizzy lays on the dirt beside the fire, watching me as tears fall from her eyes. Pulling it out, I notice it's a needle, about the size of a Med-X dispenser.

"What is this?"

I demand, and Dizzy shakes her head.

"…I'm sorry."

"Dizzy!"

I go to stand up, but my legs drop from beneath me. Dizzy watches me, sitting up on her knees. The world spins around me, and my heart starts to speed up.

"…D…Dizzy…"

I say as my vision begins to blur, going in and out of focus.

"I can't do anything without you! I can't do anything when you're here!"

There's no response I can give, because my body simply won't work. The only thing I can do is breathe and look at her. I try to communicate with her through my eyes, but it does no good. She just stares at me, crying.

"You're not dying, don't worry. But…it feels like it, doesn't it?"

She lights a cigarette. As if…none of this matters to her.

"I…didn't realize how dependant on you I was. I didn't realize any of that. And then one day I wake up and realize 'oh shit, this is my brother'. How'd you think that made me feel, huh? You want me to be happy? Well I can't be with you around. Because then I'm reminded constantly of you, and…"

She doesn't finish her sentence. Instead, she reaches and lets her fingertips brush mine. Somewhere, I don't know how far, I hear something moving. Dizzy takes her hand away, and stands up. She looks down at me, as the fire shadows her mercilessly.

"Just close your eyes. When you open them, you'll be safe. I promise."

Bending down, she kisses my forehead, as the urge to just sleep washes over me. I can't fight it, but I don't want to sleep. I want to know why she did this, and where she got whatever she shot me with. My breathing becomes deeper, as Dizzy stands over me. I feel droplets of water, tears from her eyes, as they fall onto my neck. There's a sweet sadness in her eyes.

"Can't you just let me be? Close your eyes."

I refuse. Even as my vision blurs, and blackens, I force myself to stay awake. Wiping her face with the back of her hand, Dizzy bends down once again.

"Sleep."

She presses her lips against mine, and even though she did this to me, I'm still mesmerized by her.

"I won't ever, ever forget these emotions. I promise…okay? I promise…"

She tells me, pressing her forehead against mine. Even with all this, all I want to do is comfort her. But I can't raise my arms to wrap her in them. I can't do anything, except sleep.