Oh, crap. More depth in everything. XD But hey, this is still inclusive of my plot… Shizuo is still sandwiched between his love for the two of them. ^_^ Though everything is getting haywire.
Disclaimer: I do not own Durarara! As well as Catherine. Plot and weird unheard-of places mentioned are mine. Some other references used as well.
Warnings: Yaoi and hentai. Horror and supernatural themes implied. This is NOT based on the game Catherine's story line. Shizuo, forgive me.
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Whistling Dolls
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Hi, I'm Shizuo Heiwajima and the son of a man who almost turned into a Handler as well. I have met Neko-rabbit at his last challenge and he has duly announced that my nightmares will stop. However, by then… I discovered something that I have been thinking of lately.
Neko-rabbit is, no doubt, Izaya Orihara. I have told him my bases and he has acted duly as if saying yes. Despite being killed in the nightmare realm, I have survived with only red dots in the real world… where I have seen Kasuka. How can I forget he will be back today? Now he's getting involved, too.
At the cemetery where we are going to ask about Kaa-san's warning, we met a girl named Anri who appears to be a Crier, too. She said she saved my father… but she failed to save someone named Mikado Ryuugamine from whom Izaya has sprouted out of.
My life has been turning again into a more dangerous path…
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Whistling Dolls
Yanderes… men dressed as women… nightmares… I must be so fucked.
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Inside Kasuka's head, last night…
It is almost midnight when I arrive at Ikebukuro. I promised Nii-san I will arrive by daytime… however, these scary nightmare accidents have been torturing traffic due to sudden deaths and police mobiles have been roaming around lately. Security measures have also doubled and things begin to slow down. I wish my brother is doing fine… but my instincts tell me otherwise.
I reach our house and so I use my duplicate keys to open the door. There is a pair of weird shoes of the porch… owned by a woman perhaps. Does Nii-san have a lady visitor? I walk upstairs and decide to go and check up on my brother. However, I pause for a moment when I start hearing a weeping woman's voice from his room.
"…chan, I'm so sorry. I… I can't stay with you anymore…" I peer in the door and then I see a beautiful woman in a black coat sitting on top of Nii-san. She is crying and touching Nii-san's face, "Shizu-chan… you shouldn't have gone deeper. Why? How come you are able to tell? Why did you investigate?" She then rests her head besides his chest to contain her wheezing, "I… hate you! I hate you! I hate you!"
She straightens and then she blows on his stray bangs, "This is the last time we might meet. Goodbye, I love you so bad…"
"…" I open the door and then she turns to me, "Who—?" She then twitches and escapes through the window. Instead of running after her, I stay by and call a friend, "Shinra-nii-san, please help me. Nii-san is…" He screams from the other end and he will be here in minutes. I end the call and stare at the bloody mess. I raise my brother's shirt and find no wound at all. From where does this blood come from…?
The next day, at the cemetery…
"Neko-rabbit… is Izaya Orihara. I know what he wants to do… and so I wanted to help him. Izaya doesn't want to turn me anymore. So I wanted to return the favor and do my best to purify him without him dying."
Nii-san speaks so determined that I can feel something from those words. He and that Izaya must have shared too much that they are roughly inseparable. But from the sounds of it, this Izaya Orihara is a demon like what my mother doesn't want him to get near to. We continue to stand here before Tou-san and Kaa-san's graves… in hopes of knowing answers for our own questions. Though they have not explained everything clearly, I know my brother is in great trouble…
Anri-san then looks away from us, "…There is nothing you can do, Shizuo Heiwajima."
"At least let me try! Help me save him!" He tries to force her… but mere eagerness is not enough. She then just turns away and proceed walking, "You're nothing like Kichirou-san. You're much like a greedy person who wants to consume and take hold of everything you desire. You wanted to have things your way and you're going to stop at nothing—!"
She suddenly twitches and then she turns to us… "You… how old are you?" Nii-san twitches and then he answers, "Eighteen. Why?" Anri-san then steps back and she covers her mouth with her hand, "No, it can't be like that. They must be dissolved upon recovery…"
"What are you trying to say, Anri?" Celty asks and then she responds, "It sounds impossible but it seems that one seed didn't disappear after stopping the transformation. It continued to grow… inside the human."
I don't know what they are getting to. But everyone looks at my brother… Anri-san saying, "You… your father's seed is still within you. His Handler abilities are still inside your soul…"
…?! "Shizuo Heiwajima… you're born as an incomplete Handler."
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Whistling Dolls
Rei Haruno —Sakura no Imooto
Chapter 14: Submerging in a New yet Dark Reality
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Inside Namie's head, nights ago…
My eyes finally succumb to my body's sudden imperative to open despite the bright light I am exposed to. I block my hand as a refusal to get blinded by the light. I get up and roll out of bed… soon noticing that I am indeed in my own unit. I stand up and walk to where Seiji must be… only to see such a being holding him up…
"Hahah! Wake up, little one. Seems like Mama has awakened…" He carries the baby in his arms and then he turns to me, "Yo, Namie. How are you doing?" I walk to him and then hesitate as to what I should do. Should I simply cry in desperation and elation? Or should I yell at him for the sorrow and agony? Finding no time to think, I simply speak in my usual tone, "Izaya…"
Though I am very disgusted at the way he appears in front of me, I still crave of holding him near and kissing him like how I used to. However, those feelings seem to have melted along with my pain. I stand before him like we have met every day… no missed love… no… nothing. I stare at his ruby eyes and then he gets near me after putting Seiji back at his crib…
"Seems like Seiji is very healthy. Killing burglars and all…"
"It's the seed that is making him do such a thing."
"Oh, right. You are filled with murder and greed. Ready to get rid of anything that… comes in the way of our love, neh?" Izaya smirks and then he embraces me like he used to, "I still feel your warmth despite your frozen stares, Namie. Tell me, would you like to have some reunion sex?" I can sigh and push him a bit away from me, "You're still insane. Seiji will be disgusted."
"…Uh, still regarding this little cretin as a human, huh."
Izaya Orihara… or the hooker who calls herself Kanra… still talks and acts like the man I used to be with. That, I am very glad about. I know I can't show my feelings that much… but I am happy. I then walk up to him and then wrap my arms around him… "Thank you for coming back." Izaya twitches and sighs, "…I'm just starting to have problems. And never hurt Shizuo again, will you?"
"…That man again." I glare at him and break off, "Do I still need to hold myself back? You know I am filled with murderous intent and abominable greed, ain't I?" The man turns to me and then he chuckles, "Fine, Namie. Do what you like. Just don't go over the line I am setting…" With a brief kiss, he leaves me again… might as well attempt to walk away from me for a lifetime once more.
More nights have passed and Izaya magically drops by night by night. He knows I need him more than anything and it must be because of the other woman in Shizuo Heiwajima's life. That woman who aimed her guns at me… that same woman I wanted to abolish as well. I look down at my hands and then I speak, "What have I been doing lately? I haven't killed anyone with my hands for quite some time…"
Knock. Knock. Knock. I fling to the door and expect to see Izaya again tonight. I open the door… only to be stabbed by a woman I do not recognize. I get pushed further in the room and she has been yelling out incoherent things about Izaya… lies that she indulges herself into. She then goes to stab me more and more, the sweet scent of blood conquering the room. Though I do not like it… for it is my own tainting the carpet.
I try to move yet I am unable to. My body feels so numb after what she has done and I lie awake in pain… waiting for Izaya to come and find me. I stare at the cream ceiling and somehow… I get tired and lightheaded. The blood loss is killing me and somehow, I think I will never meet Izaya again. I hear Seiji crying all of a sudden… me remembering that I have to make him milk for the night. But my body is irresponsive… might as well listen to his cries for me until the last huff of my breath.
PANG! A strong sensation of pain suddenly attacks me and I soundlessly begin writhing in pain on the floor. My numb body attends to its pain reflexes as I feel my chest burn and tear off. Soon, I feel my consciousness slip away from me. Images of something rising from my body flash inside my head as my eyes closed. I can see myself lying down at the bloody carpet… the view as if someone is lying over me.
And then I am able to take over. I escape from the tight, warm and slippery compartment I am stuck at. Slipping off from what seems to be my body I walk towards Seiji who has been crying louder and louder. I then reach out to him— only to see my arms and hands red as flames. Ignoring the shuddering fact, I hold my baby and suddenly… I feel like wanting to eat him. Extreme hunger fills me… then I begin munching at my poor child's head.
Every bite makes me feel stronger and more stable… realizing that the Handler's seed is what I have been craving for the whole while. I drop the headless body back in the crib and open the window to feel the midnight wind brush against my face. Feeling so powerful and demonic, I climb up and stare down at the people of Ikebukuro. The knob moves vigorously… and I then jump down…
Submerging myself into this new yet dark reality.
Present time…
Like that night, I sit upon the ledge of a high-rise building… waiting for Izaya to come and check up on me. It has been nights since I have awakened as Lullaby, the new Handler. And it seems that there have been a lot of Handlers that have sprouted out of Izaya's love. His love has been his greatest weapon as a Handler… finding it as the best tool to recreate our population.
Since the rise of the Handlers and Izaya's games, Criers have flocked in this marvelous city of luck, loyalty and lust. Just earlier, I have socked my fiery hands inside Criers who bleed to death… their blood getting seeped inside my skin. My long locks sway as the fierce wind fails to take them with it… yet it has successfully taken my woes to the demon I adore.
"Lullaby." I hear his voice call me as he descends out of nowhere and settles a seat next to me. I turn to him and he smiles at me along with that wicked mascot face, "You're awake." I stare at him and then I speak, "Izaya." Hearing it normal for me to say only his name, he chuckles as he admires the night view of Ikebukuro, "Do you remember your fall?"
"…And rising as a Handler? I do."
"Why does everyone I turn always remember as fast as they wake up? Most handlers don't even remember their human identities."
"I love you so bad to forget about you. And I'm dying to eradicate Shizuo Heiwajima and his woman. I cannot forget. Even for a second."
He stares at me and then he sighs, "I must admit, you never changed, Namie. I shall grant you the obligation of finishing off all the Criers that comes in the way of your love for me." I turn to him and then he begins staring at his claws, "But let me deal with Anri Sonohara. She's… my enemy."
"Then leave the other Crier and that treacherous Goat to me."
"I expect you to do your best, darling."
Izaya gets up and walks around the ledge with his arms straightened at the sides, "But let them get closer before attacking. I wish to know how much deeper Shizuo wants to submerge himself with this… fucking reality."
"I shall serve you with everything I have left."
"…No, serve yourself." He chuckles and leaps off the building to vanish with the wind. I stay seated at the ledge and wait for the moon to be coated with the blurry clouds. The hunt for those who need to die has started. Where will you be when I strike? Shizuo… Heiwajima?
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Whistling Dolls
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Outside Namie's head, inside the Kishitani Unit…
The faint sound of the whirring fan conquers all over noises within the white-green premises of Shinra's home. Shizuo, Kasuka, and Vorona have joined them that night… trying to figure out a way to help everyone.
It has been two nights since they have met with Anri Sonohara, the Crier who failed to save the human whose soul has become Neko-rabbit. She has also told them about a devastating truth of what Shizuo might have been all along. His abnormalities as a human being have been finally answered… as a human that is contaminated with a Handler's seed.
However, it has never helped them solve anything. It only has made everything complicated.
Shinra is browsing across the channels of his TV as Celty finds comfort in lying at his lap. They have been at the couch for a long while now and nothing good is on. The bespectacled man hits the sleep button and then he strokes at Celty's locks, "Hey, Shizuo. What are you planning to do now?"
"…Find Izaya." Shizuo answers as he gives up in finding something to do at the lounge. He then walks to where Shinra and Celty are— settling at the chair adjacent to the couch, "No matter what happens, I will."
"What if he doesn't want to be found?" Shinra continues to stroke at his lover's hair in a bored manner… appearing much more bored than usual. The blond then eyes at the bespectacled man's Crier, "He will be around…"
Shinra shoots his glare at his best friend and speaks with a warning, "I don't care what will happen to my bones… but I won't let you use Celty as a lure." The blond sighs and leans at the chair, "I'm not going to use her as a lure. She already is a lure in their eyes…"
The man of science silences down in his own space as he begins staring at the beauty at his lap. Her innocent face is making it hard for him to imagine that she is nothing but a Crier, a being that is born to fight with these demons called Handlers to death. He then sighs and he turns to Shizuo, "Shizuo, how do you think things will end? I mean, we'll be able to find ourselves sitting here again— with a loud TV and a dozens of stories to laugh at? Graduating with all our other acquaintances and finding decent jobs?"
"…Let's try." The blond can only chuckle at the long-shot dream as if everything is a joke. Considering their condition that has turned ugly in less than three days, Shizuo Heiwajima and his best friend, Shinra Kishitani, are the unluckiest bastards of the world. The bespectacled man nonetheless chuckles along with the best friend and he whispers, "I'll write that down… so we'll look like idiots for talking about it someday…"
"Add this up…" Shizuo whispers and then Shinra looks at him with his usual smile, "If something happens to me, please take care of Kasuka for me."
Silence eats them up and then they both laugh out. Shinra holds his mouth to stop laughing, "Kasuka is going to kill you for saying that." The blond then covers his face with a hand, "Yeah, you bet…" The bespectacled man then speaks, "…Sorry, I know you're serious but I don't think it's possible." He then strokes at Celty's locks again, "Because… I will sacrifice myself for Celty…"
"…Love… it sucks." Shizuo chuckles again and he sighs at his seat, "…I don't know how Anri-san will help us… but I still wish she would. I still have this feeling that she wants to still save Izaya." Shinra nods and then he smiles, "…As humans, we can't actually do anything much about this. But we'll still gamble in the name of love…"
Inside Shizuo's head…
"…As humans, we can't actually do anything much about this. But we'll still gamble in the name of love…"
I cannot agree less about that statement. Shinra is definitely right. It seems that we're fighting against a whole cycle of the world; and as humans, we don't have anything to stand up longer against it. But I am not an average man to start with… I'm an incomplete Handler, right? I never think there will be a day that my inhuman strength will be explained all along. It sound so fantastical at first and if I am not even acquainted to Izaya and Celty, I will never believe a word Anri-san has said. My father and I seem to have things we should have talked about…
"Shizuo Heiwajima, I didn't think you will be able to sense your fellow Handlers even when you're not one yet." I remember Izaya speak of such when he stabbed me back then. I thought he already killed me… only to find that I'm still alive and the stab is all in my nightmare. Ever since then, I cannot find myself not looking for him. I know Vorona's here with me and she's already pregnant… but there's always this part of me that asks me to make him stay.
I love Izaya. I love Vorona, too. I don't want to lose either one… or even both of them. My attachment to these definitely opposite persons has been so deep that cutting these ties proved to be lethal. I know that for one day, I will lose one or both for I will never forever have everything. That's why I plan to fight for both of them even if it means shattering my mind and heart in the process.
It is a complete picture… those two. I will never feel complete and satisfied without one of them.
Ah, I wonder where Izaya is right now. Is he sitting at his desk serving the Hotline to Hell and taking years form people? Is he chatting with his clients at the bar and seducing them into his room? Is he walking around the dark street in his dark apparels and observing this moon looming all over the city? Or perhaps he is observing human race from the tallest building in Ikebukuro.
I cannot decide which one to think of… now that more and more things get laid before me. Things are becoming more and more complicated than what I think for it to be. It all started from a day I met Vorona… the obsessed Russian girl I liberated from her father's iron hand. Also in that day, I walked into Goat's Den to meet Izaya… the bar hostess I seem to get attracted to magically. Fitting into pieces to ultimately complement each other in the yin-yang circle, Vorona and Izaya seem to become one to me. I love the both of them and I feel like I love such one person alone…
And maybe, that is the truth. I might have never seen Izaya and Vorona as different persons… only as part of an ideal woman I always wanted to have. But can I really blame myself from doing so? I was never plainly human to begin with. I'm not so sure about the details but I know I love and I will fight for love. No matter what the price is…
To me… or, ironically, to Izaya and Vorona.
This little pep talk seems to motivate me and I decide to get up and walk around the unit some more. I wave at Shinra before leaving him with his beloved Crier. I walk along the hallways and I know somehow… I want to relieve myself from everything that has been going on. I have decided on what to do and why should I do it. All that's left is to keep my resolve and survive to hold Izaya again…
Of course together with Vorona. Ah, right. Vorona… where is she? I walk around the unit and then I find her coiled up at the bed. I walk to her and then I smile, "Pregnant women shouldn't do that. Lie down properly." She then twitches and gets up, "Shizuo, I thought you have left me…" I twitch at her words and then I chuckle as I sit down beside her, "Why should I do that?" She then hums… "You have been so caught up with Neko-rabbit. I thought you have forgotten about me."
"I will never do that, Vorona." I smile and then she gets closer— asking for a kiss. I close in to seal our lips and then she starts to move and kiss me hungrily. I play with her and soon, we find ourselves on the bed and me stroking at her face, "This is bad. Shinra might even get angry… but then again, who told him to leave us alone?" I kiss Vorona back and the game of lust begins.
And upon the closure of my eyes, I see a fetus-looking seed. This must be the Handler's seed… and I can feel more and more power radiating…
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End of Chapter 14
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Thanks for reading. Please review! :)