MWAHAHAH I'M BBBBAACCKKKK!

I don't own Naruto and I will soon begin work on Metal Fox

Sunlight stabs me deep in the retinas, attacking my sleep without remorse.

"Fuck you sun, I'll kill you and plow your wife in the ass" I mumble. Naruto laughs in the bed besides me, looking much better than he did a few hours ago.

"It's time for the battles to start" a white-clad doctor gently hauls us up and leads us into a large arena. Pair of hands the size of a small building form a seal and an inscription lies underneath.

War…War Never Changes.

"Damn straight. Where there is man there is the darkness to carry out evil deeds"

The remaining genin teams, the ones not killed by Naruto and I, line the rails of the arena, looking down at a battle already taking place. A scoreboard flickers a little to draw our attention.

Choji Akimichi Vs. Rock Lee.

"That's just…unfair" Naruto cocks his head to the side in a sadistic bemusement.

The chubby Akimichi has anime tears running from his eyes as he barely dodges Lee's amped up and spandexed taijutsu barrage.

"YOSH! MY FLAMES OF YOUTH WILL LIGHT A FIRE IN YOUR HEART TO GUIDE YOU TO THE SPRINGTIME!" Lee rants as he chases poor Choji.

I shiver slightly.

Choji suddenly stops, pulling out a sword to perform seppuku.

Hayate is there to stop him time, although it causes his coughing to act up.

"Choji Akimichi is no longer able to battle! The winner is Rock Lee!" Hayate announces to the face palming crowd. One shinobi from Kumo actually knocks himself out with the force of the palm.

"THE SPRINGTIME OF YOUTH HAS PROVEN TO CONQUER ALL!" Lee sprints to his sensei.

"Naruto! Now!" I twist my fingers into a ram seal while his form hare.

Gai and Lee freeze, a perk of ripping the space and time barrier.

"Use Hiraishin, Naruto! I can't hold them much longer!" I begin to panic as the two begin to move ever so slowly.

"I can't!" Naruto pats his pockets frantically.

"WHY THE FUCK NOT!?"

"I left the kunai in the room!" he begins to run away.

One brave shinobi from Iwa takes a blow for us all as he throws himself between the two, resulting in a three-way hug but a lack of genjustu.

He is sent home with mental scars and a jonin vest….

"What the fuck just happened?" Kakashi asks.

"I…I have no clue" Kurenai stands, mouth agape and trying to process what the hell just happened.

Hayate clears his throat from the center of the ring," Will Kin Tsuchi and Isamu Shimizu step down to the battlefield, please?"

The girl smirks at me and gloats about how this will be an easy match.

Yeah. Right.

I sense something off about her, the way she walks, the way she looks back at her teammates. It's all a very elaborate act to be left alone. With a polite nod and smile I wish the raven haired beauty luck in the match.

She snorts but I take that as a warm thank you.

"Hajime!" Hayate drops his hand.

We both leap back, me sticking to the wall with chakra. I reach for my sword but soon retract it, remembering it's lying in a million pieces on the forest floor, save the hilt.

Instead I can only draw a kunai.

Bells ringing. That's a new one. My vision becomes horribly blurred then all turns black.

Genjutsu World of Kin

A dark silver moon casts an ominous glow on a blackened forest, charred and sharp grass bites at my ankles.

Kin stands in the center, holding a sword to an incapacitated Naruto's throat. His eyes plead for me to save him as the sword cuts a gentle, shallow line across his jaw.

"How does it feel to be this helpless?" Kin drags the blade across her tongue.

The sword quickly opens up Naruto's aorta, spraying me with his crimson essence. He slumps against his bonds and I can see the life draining from his eyes. A gurgle emanates from his throat for a few moments before all turns quiet.

"Genjutsu , huh? Kind of tame if you ask me" I pick my thumbnail nonchalantly.

"You should be under MY control!" she backs away slowly.

"See? That's the thing right there…I'm under no one's control" I snap my middle finger with a muted crunch.

Immediately the room returns to normal. No Naruto, no moon, and no blood.

"How?" Kin demands.

For a response I hold up the finger, the bone jutting through the skin," You're strong, no doubt about that. But sadly…it's time I ended this."

I grasp the hilt of my shattered sword and with a simple wrist flick I send it on a path for her head, it acting like a dulled kunai jetting for her forehead.

"Great Breakthrough!" I fire a gust of powerful wind to form behind the hilt.

CLANG.

Her head snaps back at the sudden contact, she's unconscious on her feet. Slowly, she rocks back and forth before toppling forward.

I'm there before she connects with the concrete.

"Winner: Isamu!" Hayate announces to the other genin.

I opt to carry Kin to the infirmary myself, an odd feeling tugging at the back of my mind.

"What a great match, Isamu!" Hiruzen laughs heartily and shakes my hand vigorously.

"Thank you, Old Man" I grin at Naruto's surrogate granddad.

"You seem worried about this girl" the Third sees me tense slightly.

"I just have this…feeling something horrible is gonna happen to her I want to keep an eye on her. Can I allow her to stay at the mansion for a while until I get this all sorted out?"

"Of course Isamu, she'll be welcomed with open arms" Sarutobi swings his arms out.

"But first…" I pull down her scarf to reveal a small curse mark. I copy Kakashi's hand signs quite easily and smear my blood from a freshly bitten thumb onto the seal.

"Seal Dissipation"

Half a heartbeat passes before huge wave of agony washes over me like a ninety foot tsunami, filling my senses to the brim with despair and pain.

I bite down on hard on my cheek to try to stop the scream boiling in my throat like molten tar. Crimson jets from my eyes, nose, ears, and mouth, making a large puddle on the floor.

"Sucks to be a janitor today" I choke out a strangled laugh.

After an agonizing forty minutes of pain I finally succumb to blissful unawareness.

…

"Fuck. My. Life." I manage to squeeze out through tightly grit teeh.

"Get up" a foot pokes my nostril and an ethereal voice drifts from above me.

I crack open my eyes to find an ocean, pitch black in color. A girl stands to my side, her hair a golden waterfall, and her eyes ripple like the ocean.

"And you are…?" I fish for a name.

"The clan spirit of the Shimizu. My name is Kai and I'm the one who's been keeping your ass alive" she snorts.

I drop to a knee with my head bowed low," It is an honor, Lady Kai."

Her face shows shock, like this was the last thing she ever expected.

"Why are you…?" she gestures to my prostrated state.

"You've save my life many times. I am forever in your debt, My Lady."

"Uhhhh…Rise?" she utters.

I do just that, meeting her eyes and quickly becoming lost in them," So what the fuck's up with the ocean?"

"When you absorbed that disgusting seal, you tainted your inner peace with the demons of Orochimaru" Kai looks at the ocean grimly.

"How do I fix it?" It seems like a pretty damn big project to take up.

Kai waves her hand and a small boy appears in between us. He has jet black hair, yellow-slitted eyes, and pale skin.

"Orochimaru as a…child?" this is a new development.

She nods and pushes a dagger into my hands," Kill him."

Two simple words blow me back miles. The young snake turns to me with a warm and trusting look in his eyes.

"I…."

His eyes are full of such curiosity and life, not a goddamn thing like the sick adult version. My hand trembles as I force myself to raise the blade, fear flashing in his eyes.

Something stirs deep inside of me, reminding me of my own past. The fear, the loneliness, the dire and dark pain that seems to seep into every part of your soul. The bandits that took my eye cross my mind. Orochimaru reminds me of….

Me.

That dreaded knife falls to the ground with a soft thump and I embrace the young boy. His arms wrap around me and I feel tears on my chest.

"Lady Kai, I refuse" I stand my ground firmly, eyes blazing with resolution.

A low hum draws my attention back to the black ocean. The black fades into a whirlpool and I can make out faces trapped in the riptide. Bandits, demons, skeletons, everything that had haunted me is dragged under without so much as a death rattle.

Kai seems to glow as the ocean turns a frosty ice-blue.

"I have no clue what the Hell just happened…care to explain?" I face the smiling Kai.

"You pass my test…you are the Hero of Innocence. The Gods above have deemed you worthy as have I. You now have Orochimaru's purity, something he cast aside decades ago in his bastardized quest for immortality. With it, you and you alone can help save him from the dark path his dances down" this time Kai embraces me tightly.

She whispers something in my ear," Ask your Hokage about the Clan Restoration Act. I'll be happy to join it."

Suddenly my pants feel eight sizes too small.

"What will happen with Orochimaru?" I look at the young boy clutching my leg tightly.

"I will guard him until the time is right for you to save him."

With a nod I step back and ruffle the snake's hair, making him laugh happily.

"You really are something else, Isamu. Naruto and you might just redeem this sad and corrupt world", she winks and gives me a small kiss on the cheek before I'm thrust back into the world of the conscious.

So what'd you think? See you later, bro's.