This is not a funny chapter, but it's obviously an essential one and I've been meaning to write it... So here you go. What I have to say about the major argument against our favourite pairing.

Disclaimer: It's all Rowling's.

The-don't-hit-me Disclaimer: I love Harry Potter and everything about it. I also love Harry Potter fanfiction. I'm not criticising anything here, nor do I think I'm funny. I'm just doing this for my own amusement.

50 Reasons to Ship Draco/Hermione

Reason n°14: Because blood prejudice is outdated.

The major argument against Dramione is obviously blood status. "Mudblood" is a hugely offensive term and Draco is the first one to use it during the series – against Hermione, no less. How are you supposed to get past that? How could love bloom (*cough* excuse the cheesiness) despite this prejudice? Easy, Dramione fans say. And they're right, for the following reasons (list not exhaustive):

1 – Canon does it for us

In canon, Dramione-haters will say, Draco is possibly the most stuck-up, cowardly and despicable character ever, second only to Wormtail. He needs bodyguards (Crabbe and Goyle), needs to be around idiots to feel important (Crabbe and Goyle), doesn't know what true friendship is (Crabbe and Goyle, and Pansy), lies and play-acts (the Buckbeak incident, and Pansy), and he can't even cast a proper Killing Curse. He acts all important because he's on the Dark Lord's side and isn't even capable of carrying out his decisions. On top of all that, he's blood prejudiced. So canon Draco should be pretty low on the desirable scale, shouldn't he?

Well, he isn't. I mean, not that low. Certainly not as high as fanon Draco (yum), but still. Because despite everything I just said, Draco isn't quite as hateable as Voldemort or even Wormtail (who is actually more hated by fans than Voldemort). He isn't capable of murder. This is a weakness for him, but it's most importantly a sign of his humanity. Draco knows fear, he probably knows love (his family?), and above all, he's human. And in this fandom, anything even vaguely human is dateable.

Okay, okay! I promise I'll stop trying to make jokes.

He called Hermione a Mudblood, that's true. Not many fics even try to deny that, though some just skirt over the fact rather smoothly. But you have to admit it was a long time ago, and canon shows Hermione as someone with a lot of love and compassion and a huge capacity for forgiveness. Remember her reaction when Kreacher called her a Mudblood? (I realise this is the second time I compare Draco to a house-elf in this fic. I should probably stop.) It's kind of the same thing with Draco. (I'll stop now.) He believes his blood is superior, but only because he's been taught to think like that ever since he was little, like Kreacher. (Or now.) If Kreacher is forgivable, so is Draco. (All right, so I won't stop. So sue me.)

2 – Blood prejudice must know an end

"What made you change your mind, Draco?" she murmured, her lips brushing against the top of his head. "I've always wondered."

He took her wrists in his hands and pushed her away slightly, so he was looking her in the eye. "It was inevitable, really..."

Because I say so.

Nineteen years later, "All is well" and the biggest racist of all wizarding time is gone for good. The Death Eaters are all either dead or imprisoned, except for one or two (Lucius and probably Draco, though we were never explicitly told he had the Mark; we know Narcissa didn't), and peace has been restored to the wizarding world. Happily ever after. I've already mentioned this once or twice (or three thousand times), but can you think of a better way to signal that bad blood is behind them than a Dramione romance? (There are also some good Harry/Pansy fics out there, actually.)

After what happened, the Malfoys couldn't go on being openly prejudiced. Not that anyone would listen to them anyway. Maybe Lucius would be too far gone, but I can really see Narcissa reaching out to the only sister she has left, Andromeda, and growing to care for Teddy, her half-breed (Remus was a werewolf) and half-blood grand-nephew whom Andromeda looks after. After Hermione's torture at Malfoy Manor (do you remember Draco refused to identifty them? He didn't want them to die, even though Hermione was Muggleborn), I don't think Draco could consider her as anything less than human. Muggleborns scream just as loud as anyone else, and I believe Draco knows that, somewhere deep inside. That being said, it becomes strangely not unthinkable to imagine he and Hermione having to talk to each other once after the war and finding, if not a romance, then at least some sort of mutual understanding and closure. From then on, anything can happen.

3 – Flat characters are boring

"Oh... Malfoy," she said, surprised.

He hadn't changed much, except for a few lines on his face and maybe a slightly higher forehead.

"It's been... a long time."

Disgust flashed in his grey eyes as he straightened up and looked at her. "It has, hasn't it," he said slowly, disdain dripping from his voice. "Fancy bumping into the Mudblood know-it-all after all these years."

I'm not saying that there is no other way to flesh out Draco than by having him engage in a romantic relationship with Hermione, though it certainly is the best way. I mean, there's also Drarry and Draco/Ginny and some other pairings (I'm just kidding, people). But (un)surprisingly, many people who are against Dramione fall into one of three categories:

a) the fangirls who say that Hermione isn't good enough for Draco (WTH?),

b) the more reasonable people who believe that canon Draco is a stuck-up, arrogant, prejudiced bastard who would never even look at Hermione and who isn't good enough for her anyway, so why bother?

To which I say: in what way is Ron good enough for Hermione? *ducks flying tomatoes* All right, all right, don't get your knickers in a knot. It was a joke. I don't much like Ron, but this isn't really an anti-Ronmione fic, and as much as I would love to rip Ron to shreds, I have more respect for his fans than that... and Rupert Grint was awesome in the films, by the way. So let's take a different stand... What kind of flat, one-dimensional villain do you take Draco for? Rowling doesn't have a single one-dimensional character in the entire series, with the possible exception of Vernon Dursley who makes up for it by his physical dimension. Rowling is much too good a writer for that. Draco appears several times throughout the books and he is not flat. Like I said before, she has shown us that he is human.

It would be boring to have him, nineteen years later, still as prejudiced as ever. It would be interesting to see him change his ways and realise how human and worthy Hermione herself is.

4 – Impossible is fun

"Hey, Draco?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think that... if we tried... this could work?"

"No. But let's try anyway."

Should I have failed to convince you that Draco could change enough to make him date material, keep this invented-on-the-spot Dramione motto in mind: there is nothing sweeter than impossible love. Anyone will tell you that. Ole' Shakespeare would totally approve. So let us have fun with these characters. We believe they can work.

And that's it... So very not funny, but important so I hope you'll forgive me! :)