Disclaimer: All characters belong to J.K. Rowling. I own nothing of hers! *This chapter jumps a lot in time!*
Chapter 14
"There you are."
Hermione turned around to see her husband's relieved smile at locating her. Closing the door to the Burrow, he entered the frigid air outside. Ron stood by her form which looked across the Burrow's frozen garden.
"Bit chilly to be out, love," Ron pressed a kiss to Hermione's curls. She had left her hat on the hook, yet, wrapped herself in her winter coat.
"I needed some air," Hermione sighed, knowing her husband would know exactly what was going on.
He sighed as well, taking her glove covered hand in his.
"We knew this kind of news would be coming. The family's only bound get bigger," Ron attempted to justify, knowing his heart ached as well.
"I thought that would make this all easier. All the new additions that have come and are coming...Perhaps I was wrong." Her breath spilled out of her mouth in fog.
"Hey. You're not ready to give up yet, are you?" Ron nudged her shoulder with his, while feeling her hand squeeze his harder.
"Of course not. But..." she let out a frustrated breath, "it's been a year, now over a year... and nothing! Yet all the women in there are so damn fertile and... and... I'm... not." She spat, coming to a solemn end.
"Hey," Ron turned Hermione to face him, taking both of her hands into his, "We knew this would be a possibility- not that it makes it hurt less. What does Healer Clarke say about it?"
"That these things take time. Sometimes years... that it might not happen at all..." Hermione tore her eyes away from her husband and looked out to where they knew gravestones laid under a blanket of snow.
Ron's stomach tightened as he remembered visiting that grave just a few months prior, at the gathering to remember Maisie's one year of passing.
"I keep thinking about it too. We were much more healed since Maisie's funeral, but, it still rattled me more than I thought it would." Ron whispered, and wrapped his arm around Hermione's shoulders, keeping her warm.
"I don't think this healing thing is ever going to end. A full year passed without her... Right when I think I have it together, I'm reminded that I'm barren and lost my baby girl. And then feel greedy and guilty for dreaming of another when I have one healthy, intelligent, bloody amazing, daughter to care for."
"We don't know that you're barren. And you're not greedy. Not everyone's experienced what we've gone through, what you've gone through. We'll have our family. If that means waiting, or adopting, or being content with that we have. As long as I have you and Rose, I will be the happiest I can be. Any other children that may come into our lives will just multiply that joy."
He heard her sniffle before the air moved again with the door opening.
"Hey, Mum says supper is ready, and Rose is scarfing down a roll as we speak. She practically growled at Harry when he told her to take smaller bites."
Hermione gave a small chuckle, pressed a kiss to her husband's cheek, and entered the house.
Ginny stepped out once it was just the pair of them. She wrapped her sweater tighter around her body, and bulging stomach.
"How is she?"
Ron glanced at his sister, concern written across her face.
"She'll make it. I told her last night, but, I think it's all been hard on her. The family keeps growing, yet, ours is at a standstill. It gets to her."
"And what about you?"
Ron shook his head and sighed, "When Charlie told me last night, I was happy for him and Sophie, proud even. But, once he left, it hurt. Knowing that we've been trying for over a year, and theirs was completely unplanned... that's what hurt the worst. I didn't tell Hermione that, but, I'm sure she worked it out."
"I'm sure she did. She's brilliant," She paused, taking in the serene winter landscape around them. Breathing a sigh, she turned toward her brother, "And whatever happens, I know you and Hermione will make it through together. You've already been through so much... there's no way anything will keep you down," Ginny smiled and placed her hand on top of Ron's
Ron grinned at the gesture and her words. He wrapped a large arm around he shoulders and gave her a squeeze, "thanks sis. Now let's get you, and my future nephew inside and warm again."
And together, they returned to the family inside.
"I saved you a piece."
Ron looked up to see Hermione bringing him a slice of cake.
"Ta, love. I assumed it was already gone," he happily took the plate from his wife, and sighed contently as he bit into the delectable creation.
"I managed to slip a few pieces into the cupboard before the family snatched it all."
Ron nodded, as Hermione relaxed further into the sofa, pulling her legs up to sit on her side, watching him.
"I can't believe she's already five. I mean, where did the time go?" Ron looked at all the gifts left behind by family members hours ago. Knowing their newly five year old was sleeping soundly upstairs.
"I wondered the same thing. She's not a baby anymore, not even a toddler." Hermione managed a small smile.
They came to a small silence, as Ron finished his cake, licking the fork clean of any remnants.
Hermione chuckled at her husband's manners, before turning serious.
"Ron, I know we've been thinking about adoption..."
Ron's ears perked up when he heard the topic. He turned to look at his wife. Ever since their tragic loss, the light that had once shone brightly through her eyes every day, turned sad. He had seen that light only a few times since that day.
"Have you?" Ron replied, thickly swallowing and listening intently.
"Yes," she paused and watched him for a moment before continuing, "I think we should begin looking into it. Or at least start saving for it."
He nodded, sitting up straighter and setting the dish and fork on the low table.
"What are your thoughts?" She whispered, apprehension showing on her face.
"I think it's a great idea. The timing seems right. I just..." he leaned forward, placing his elbows on his knees, "I don't know much about it in the muggle world, but, in the magical world, there's not many options there."
Ron spoke methodically, watching his wife's reaction.
"How so?" Hermione questioned, keeping a stoic composure.
"Well, with all the potions and contraception spells, there aren't too many unplanned pregnancies. And if there are, well, there just aren't loads of babies to adopt. The ones that are typically up for adoption are the kids whose parents have been killed or sent to Azkaban."
He recalled the infant they were requested to care for just after they lost their own child. A department for this was practically nonexistent at the ministry. Most of the time they just researched the next closest relative or godparent, and sent the child to live with them, even if they were unaware the child even existed. Harry's past showed exactly how well that system worked.
"And I'm sure muggle adoptions are almost out of the question." Hermione spoke sadly.
Ron wrapped his arm around her, pulling her to himself, "Hey, we're going to try, and whatever happens, is the right thing. Perhaps we will be the best fit for a child. We could be just what they need."
She looked up at her husband and smiled, pressing a kiss to his lips.
"Thank you for being so positive in this."
He looked into her deep brown eyes and was filled with reassurance. He could see that light. It was dim, but not extinguished. Whatever they were doing, was the right step. He kissed her again.
"I'm just being honest. I truly think our family will work itself out. And if you're worried, I'll believe it enough for the both of us, until you do too."
Hermione's eyes became very shiny then, wondering how she got so damn lucky to be married to this man. She stood, and took his hand, causing him to stand as well.
"Let's go to bed, love."
The crisp October air caused Hermione to pull her coat tighter around herself. Squeals and the chatting of children were all she could focus on, as Rose held tightly to her parent's hands, stretching her neck around, keeping a careful watch.
A heavily pregnant woman toting a girl with sleek black pigtails, made their way into view.
"Mummy! Daddy! There she is! There's Jasmine!" Rose giggled, tugging on Ron's hand to move them closer.
As they both arrived near the flagpole, Rose jumped up and down in excitement. The woman approaching there seemed a bit winded, as the child with her had be pulling her as well.
"Hello! You must be Rose's parents! Jasmine has been chatting my ear off for weeks about her bestest friend Rose." The woman chuckled, resting a hand on her protruding belly and rubbed it in a small circle, while trying to catch her breath.
Hermione's stomach clenched, causing her to hesitate, when Ron caught on quickly.
"Rose has been telling us about Jasmine as well! She couldn't wait for us to meet you. I'm Ron, and this is my wife, Hermione." Ron reached out and shook the woman's hand, Hermione quickly recovered and shook her hand.
"I'm Amelda. Geoffrey, my husband, had to work this morning, and couldn't make it.."
"It's a pleasure. Now we can get some sort of play date scheduled for these two," Hermione said cheerfully.
"Yes! Jasmine would just love that-"
"My mummy's having a baby! I have a baby sister coming in three weeks!" Jasmine said gleefully, jumping with joy, as she held up two fingers.
Rose gasped and put a hand over her mouth, "My mummy's having a baby too!" She joined squealing and hopping.
Amelda looked up to Hermione, and smiled, "Congratulations! How far along are you?"
Hermione stood shell shocked at what her daughter had said.
"No... I'm... I'm not..." Ron reached down to hold her hand.
"I apologize, I'm not sure why Rose said that," he said pointedly looking at his daughter, "We're not expecting right now." Ron explained, feeling Hermione squeezing his hand tighter.
"Oh, well-"
Luckily the bell rang for the children's school day to begin.
Kisses and hugs were exchanged between the children and their parents, and the little girls skipped over and into the classroom.
"It was so nice meeting you. We'll be in touch about a play date?" Amelda smiled sweetly.
"Absolutely," Hermione responded, nodding her head.
With that, the parents dispersed.
Moments later, when Hermione and Ron Apparated home, he instantly took Hermione into his arms.
She sighed heavily, and shook her head against his shoulder.
"I'm fine," she muffled.
"Are you?" He quipped, feeling the tension in her shoulders lessen, as she moved her arms to hold tightly to Ron.
"I don't know anymore. I'm beginning to think I never will be," she rested her head into his chest for a few moments more, before stepping back.
"Did what the adoption agency say, make this worse?" Rob asked comfortingly, knowing the answer.
She scoffed, hastily wiping the tears from her eyes. "We knew they probably wouldn't have any children for us."
"That doesn't make it any easier," Ron rubbed her arm.
"Right. It doesn't." She snapped, cringing and taking a deep breath before steadying herself on the counter.
"I'm sorry. I just... I'm sorry," she took another calming breath before continuing, "I shouldn't have snapped. I've got to get going now."
She paced over to grab her briefcase and pecked Ron on the cheek.
"Love you."
She spoke before Flooing to the Ministry, leaving Ron staring at an empty fireplace.
That Thursday evening, Ron stepped out of the Floo into the living room. The day had been relentless, and he sighed, as he stretched out his neck, and removed his cloak.
He moved to the kitchen to begin dinner, something he enjoyed doing while Hermione spent some time with Rose after picking her up from school.
When he entered the kitchen he noticed his wife sitting at the bar with a glass of water in front of her.
"Mione?" He mused, taking in her pale, and clammy form, "What are you doing home? Where's Rosie? Love, are you sick?"
He rushed over to place his hand on her forehead, feeling just how warm and lightly sweaty she was.
"I'm fine. Rosie's still at Mum's. I just went to the healer today," she spoke, her hand shaking slightly when moving to pick up her water glass, before changing her mind, and leaving it on the tabletop.
"The healer... what did she say? Are you alright? You're not getting sick again, are you? I thought the last time you saw her you took the potion to prevent influenza. Did she say that's what it is? It's really early in the season for that. We should get you on the settee or in bed. Which would you rather-" Ron rambled before being cut off.
"Ron."
He snapped his vision back to his wife, waiting to find out just why she looked so awfully sick.
"I'm pregnant."
Ron looked at his wife, shocked.
"You think you're pregnant?" Ron asked seriously, knowing it had been years since...
"No. I am. That's why I went to see Healer Clarke this morning. I'm five weeks along," Hermione sighed, attempting a sip of her water.
Ron stood there taking in the information he was given; his heart thumping madly at the fact that they were finally pregnant after years of trying. A baby. They were going to have a baby, something they had been yearning for for... that's when he realized this wasn't like she told him last time.
Keeping his excitement internal, he asked, "How are you?"
Hermione understood his vague question, shrugging her shoulders, "I'm scared."
Ron watched as she began to wipe the tears from her eyes. A moment which was supposed to be so happy, was now cloaked with sadness and fear.
"Hey, hey," Ron rushed over to sit next to his wife, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. "This is going to be different than last time. You had the procedure done, you heard Healer Clarke."
"Nothing is for sure. I could lose this one too... I can't make it through losing another baby, Ron. I can't."
"Neither can I, love. That's why it's not going to happen."
"You and I both know it's out of our control."
"Then I'll just hope as much as I can for it. And I'll hope enough for you too, until you're able to." Ron kissed her forehead, and hugged her to him. She smiled at the familiarity of his phrase.
"I want to be happy. I thought, I'd be happy. But, as soon as she confirmed it, I've been terrified," she sniffled, while reaching up to dry more fallen tears.
"I'm sure Healer Clarke's treating this one differently, eh?" Ron countered reassuringly, as she leaned in further to his embrace.
She nodded into his shoulder, "Appointments once weekly, minimum. Check-ins halfway through each visit, reduced stress, more potions, possibly less work..."
"See? She's taking care of all the worrying for us. We don't need to do any of it," Ron said, hardly being able to stop himself from bursting with joy.
Hermione had to admit, her husband's smile, the one she fell in love with, so many years ago, was contagious. She felt herself give a little smile as well.
"I'll try my best."
His grin seemed to stretch across his face as he leaned forward to press his lips to hers, "that's all I ask."
...
Later that night, after they had put their daughter to bed, Hermione was lying with her head on Ron's shoulder, as he gently stroked her still small stomach, when she recalled what had happened a few days prior.
"Do you think Rosie knew I was pregnant?"
Ron thought for a minute, recalling their daughter's outburst with her friend earlier that week.
"At first I thought she was just trying to have something in common with Jasmine's mom, but, when we were home, I felt light headed and after Flooing to the Ministry, I was sick."
Rob nodded as he listened, "how would she have known? Before us even?"
"I don't know. But, even with her first sign of magic, it was kept from us for... who knows how long before we finally caught her. Perhaps she senses things?" Hermione pondered.
"Well, let's just ask her when we tell her," Ron pressed a kiss to her curls, "Have you thought about when you'd like to share our news?"
He felt her inhale deeply, knowing that of course she had already thought about it.
"I want to keep this to ourselves as long as possible. I know your mum can sniff it out, but, I'd still like to wait." Hermione explained.
"And what about telling Rosie?" Ron inquired, feeling Hermione shift a bit.
"I'm not sure. At least she understands keeping a secret now. Maybe we will be able to tell her before the rest of the family."
"Maybe," Ron breathed, he stilled his hand on their growing child, and a smile crept on his face. "I can't tell you how much I love you. You know that?"
Hermione looked up into his eyes as her lips spread into a grin, "I do. Luckily, you show me perfectly."
Ron pressed a kiss to her curls, and relaxed into sleep.
A few days later, Rose was coloring at the table while her parents were making dinner. Ron insisted that he had everything taken care of, and led Hermione to the table with a cup of tea to rest, kissing her temple before returning to the kitchen.
Hermione sighed as she shook her head at Ron's protective nature. He didn't have to say a word for Hermione to figure out what he was doing.
She looked over at her daughter who was drawing intently, focusing just about as much as when she reads a book.
"What are you drawing, sweetheart?" Hermione peered over to see the illustration, noticing something very curious.
"It's us, Mummy! You, and me, and Daddy, and Baby," Rose explained, setting down her purple crayon in exchange for a reddish brown crayon, continuing to draw in spiraled motions to create her mum's hair.
Hermione glanced up at Ron, who had heard their daughter's response, nodding at Hermione to continue.
"Rose," Hermione approached carefully, reaching over to calm her coloring hand. Rose looked up at her mum, realizing she wanted her full attention.
"Love, why did you tell Jasmine's mummy the other day, that I was going to have a baby?" Hermione asked while her daughter looked up at her with huge blue eyes.
"Because Mummy, you want a baby. And you're going to have a baby!" Rose replied, almost laughing at her mother's daft question.
Hermione raised an eyebrow at Ron who had stepped away from the stove, and paced closer to the conversation.
"But, Rosie, just because Mummy and I want a baby, doesn't mean a baby just happens," Ron attempted, shrugging at his wife when she looked up at his words.
"Oh, Daddy!" And this time, Rose really did laugh, while picking up her crayon and continued her coloring despite her parents' silly questions. "Baby's in Mummy's tummy, see?" As Rose pointed to her drawing, where she had drawn Hermione's stomach so large it looked as if she were in her 20th month of pregnancy.
At this, Hermione and Ron looked at each other, unsure just how to continue.
"Well, Rosie, I am pregnant. You were right, I'm going to have a baby." Hermione said slowly.
Rose dropped her crayon at this, and a huge smile grew on her face, "Oh Mummy! That's fantastic!" She scooted out of her chair and ran over to her mum, jumping up, to wrap her arms around her in a hug.
Ron stood there shaking his head, not understanding why Rose was just now so excited if she had known all along.
Hermione relished the exuberance her daughter was displaying at the thought of a sibling.
"Now, Rosie, can you keep this a secret? We don't want to tell Grandmum, or Nana, or Victoire or anyone yet. Can you do that for Mummy and Daddy?" Hermione asked as she tucked a bundle of red curls behind her daughter's ear.
Their daughter looked baffled at this, "Why can't we tell Nana and Grandmum yet? Won't they be happy?"
Hermione but her lip, as she desperately wished she could just tell her daughter it was complicated and move on. Yet, she and Ron had been very honest with Rose for her age, and she always promised that would stay the same.
"Well, love, Mummy's lost a baby before. It was when you were little, do you remember us telling you about her?"
Rose nodded, very seriously, "she's with Uncle Fredie now?"
Ron's eyes began to tear, as he remembered telling Rose about that while visiting Maisie's grave, marking her one year of passing. And showing her the pictures that Rose had begun to notice on Hermione's nightstand.
"Yes, sweetheart, and I went to the doctor to try and never have that happen again. Now, we just have to make sure the baby is healthy and safe a while before we tell the family. Can you understand that, Rosie?" Hermione looked at their daughter who was wide beyond her years, yet, still struggling to understand, as any child would.
"Okay, Mummy. I will keeps it a secret." Rose nodded, as if she had been given a very important duty.
"Thank you, Rosie Posie," Ron stepped in then, swooping the small redhead into his arms, with a squeal being released from her.
"Now, we can still be excited and talk all about your new sibling. Maybe you can even help us choose a name for Baby, eh? Would you like that Rosie?" Ron asked, as she settled on his hip, and wrapped her arms around his neck.
"Oh yes, Daddy! That would be brilliant!" She reached closer to him and squeezed a bit tighter, hugging him effectively, as she secured her hold with his arms. Hermione watched on, pleased with how such a difficult conversation had turned out.
"I hope this baby doesn't get lost, Daddy."
Hermione sighed, agreeing with her daughter, as Ron met her glance before he responded.
"Me too, Rosie. Me too."
A/N: Thank you so much for waiting patiently. I have the next chapter basically ready to go after this, and will be posting the final chapter when I get that finished. I will warn you the final chapter is not planned to be very long, but, we will see when I get around to write it. I appreciate your patience as I basically cranked this out when I had time the last several weeks. I'm still amazed I got this far. Please let me know what you think!