Chapter 10.5: Doubt.

Also known as: Not-Everything-Goes-Smoothly

Corrin wandered across the courtyard of the Astral Castle, glancing between the exhaustion written on the faces of her allies. The whole day had been spent travelling despite the weariness set in their bones. The fight at Cyrkensia had taken a lot out of all of them. They'd barely gotten out by the skin of their teeth and most still carried sore muscles and bruises, some bandaged and stitched as their healers were at their limits.

Corrin had spied Sakura dozing under a tree minutes earlier, wondering if her sister knew that the Kitsune had joined her. Kaden lay across her lap in his fox form, head sprawled on her thighs as they both slept in the lazy afternoon light. His ears would twitch occasionally, as if concentrating on some far away noise, before he'd settle again, stretching out further across her lap.

She would've considered it cute if she could associate Kaden's fox form with anything but blood and claws. Sharp teeth, dripping crimson, and burning fear. Corrin swallowed the building anxiety in her gut at what should've been a gentle, adorable sight, and turned away.

Each of her allies had settled into their roles at the Astral Castle, despite how exhausted they were. Corrin made her way to each one, checking, making sure they were okay. That they could still fight, still stand, still protect themselves.

That they still trusted her.

It was silly. She knew that. But after what happened, after Zola had betrayed them so blatantly, Corrin couldn't settle the trepidation churning inside. It wasn't that she doubted her allies. That she'd expect them to betray her. No, she was afraid of the opposite. That they doubted her.

That they expected her to betray them.

Hana was the same as always, gruff and distrusting, though her glares had softened, especially whenever Subaki was around to bait her into an argument. She had to thank the pegasi knight sometime. Whether he knew it or not, he'd made it easier for her to converse with Sakura's retainer. After checking on them, Corrin made her way to the stables, where Silas and Hinoka were tending to their mounts.

Silas tended gently to the wound healing around his horse's leg. He gave her a tight smile which she returned, before heading over to Hinoka. Her elder sister ran a thick brush through her pegasus's mane and it nuzzled her shoulder.

Hinoka hummed lightly as she worked. "There you go… feel's good, doesn't it?" she spoke lightly to her pegasus, and it fluffed out its wings, giving its head a dramatic shake. Hinoka scoffed. "Don't get your feathers all ruffled! That just makes it harder to brush you…"

The mood was light, Hinoka smiling gentle at her horse, and it doused any fear flickering inside Corrin's chest.

"I thought all horses liked to get brushed," Corrin said, coming to stand beside her sister. "Although, I guess pegasi aren't exactly horses…"

Hinoka laughed, giving Corrin a bright smile. "The same still applies. She's just being difficult." Hinoka shook her head, clicking her tongue as if miffed, but still smiled. Corrin reached out tentatively and stroked the pegasus' mane. She'd never been this close to a pegasus. She'd tended to, and ridden, horses during that other time, but not a pegasus. She couldn't help but find them strange. Majestic, even. It was baffling how, just by having wings, they had such a different presence than horses.

"She's beautiful," Corrin said. She stared down the length of its graceful, white-feathered wings. Feathers littered the floor of its pen, and Corrin couldn't help but feel like that was a waste. They were so beautiful…

"Oh, she knows that, I'm sure," Hinoka said, chuckling to herself. "She's got a real personality, this one. Despite how long we've been together, she still thinks she knows best." Hinoka tended to her pegasus' mane with long, gentle strokes, ministrations that her mount clearly enjoyed. "I can count on her in a fight, despite how frustrating she can be, and that's all that matters."

Corrin pressed her lips tightly together. "I can tell there's a lot of trust between you two."

Hinoka nodded. "Yeah, but it wasn't always that way. Trust takes time and effort. It won't just snap in place instantly, regardless how deeply you wish for it."

Corrin's heart dropped. Her fingers stilled on the pegasus' mane and she withdrew them slowly. "Do… do you trust me…?"

Hinoka snapped her head toward Corrin, mouth agape and eyes wide. A jolt of embarrassment shot through Corrin. Blood flushed to her face at the admittance of her doubt, her fear that lingered beneath the surface.

"I-I mean, it's not that I don't think you do, it's just–" Corrin stopped herself from rambling and forced out a deep sigh. "After what happened in Cyrkensia… I trusted Zola, brought him into our team, only to have him…" Another sigh, deeper this time, stole from her lungs.

"Don't you dare blame yourself!" Hinoka chided. Her eyes flashed with hurt and something deeper that Corrin barely glimpsed. "You just did what you thought was right. It was that horrid Nohrian's fault." She grumbled, her fingers tightening around the brush. "I should've kept a closer eye on him. It wasn't that I trusted him, but after he saved Takumi…"

Corrin nodded, agreeing with the slightest movement, though she didn't let on that her regret lay deeper than that. A silence fell between the two, broken periodically by whinnies and heavy stomping by both pegasi and horses.

Hinoka lay down her brush, giving her pegasus a quick pat. "There we go! All done. Wasn't too bad, was it?" The pegasus just shook its head, blonde mane swishing. Hinoka turned to Corrin. "I'm about finished up here. Was there anything you needed?"

Corrin shook her head, a reflex that came a little too quickly, before she realised that there hadn't been a reason she'd came. It was just that she felt comfortable around Hinoka.

It came as a start, a sudden realisation, that Corrin wanted to talk to Hinoka more. That maybe, just maybe, she wanted to get to know her sister.

Her sister.

Just when had that title fit Hinoka so well? When had she come to accept it, to enjoy the invisible bonds joining them together?

With that came a faint stab, a needle of regret. Corrin pushed down the image of Camilla, of Elise, that flashed in her mind.

"I was just wondering…" Corrin began, but stalled as she wracked her brain for a topic. Hinoka's pegasus whinnied, drawing her attention. "What made you decide to become a sky knight? I'm kind of curious, actually…"

Hinoka followed Corrin's gaze to her pegasus. "I'm not sure if it's a story I should tell you…" Catching the flash of hurt in Corrin's eyes, she continued, "No, that's wrong. Now that we're reunited, I can share it with you." She paused, her eyes lifting to the wooden roof, as if searching her memories. "After you were kidnapped, I was so mad. At the Nohrians, at myself, I don't know." She shrugged tensely. "I didn't know what to do with myself. On a couple of occasions, I snuck out of the castle, thinking I could come save you."

Corrin gaped. "Really?" The idea of a little Hinoka dashing from the castle, determination hard in her young eyes, was strange. No, it was more than that. It was the idea that her disappearance, her kidnapping, had had such an effect on her sister. An effect she'd never known.

Hinoka pulled a sheepish smile. "Really. But I never got far. I was always stopped by the castle staff, Ryoma, or even mother herself." She shook her head as if in disbelief at her own actions. "I was so angry at those Nohrians for taking you away from us… and I was mad at myself for not being able to do anything about it."

"You were just a child…" Corrin said, swallowing the lump forming in her throat. Talking about her kidnapping like this brought a surge of emotions she didn't know what to do with. They hung over her shoulders, her heart, pinning her in a place she didn't want to be. Making her feel things she didn't want to feel.

Hinoka nodded. "I realised that when I got older. I'd been trying to do the impossible. There's no way a child like me could've walked through all of Nohr and save you. And then one day, I saw a pegasus flying…" she sighed whimsically. "It looked free. Free of regrets, of the limitations that hold us down here on earth. I guess I wanted to escape as well, looking up at that pegasus flying wherever it wanted, whenever it wanted…"

Corrin found herself matching her sister's whimsical smile. She really had felt free, flying up above everyone on a pegasus in the Opera House. Despite the lurching fear and battle raging beneath them.

"Is that when you decided to become a sky knight?" Corrin asked.

Hinoka nodded, reaching out and stroking her pegasus. "Indeed. That decision has driven almost everything I've done since then. It's made me into the person I am today – much stronger and determined. And free, I suppose, of regret." She smiled brighter, her eyes gleamed with joy. "I should take you up again sometime. When we're not fighting for our lives."

Corrin smiled. "I think I'd like that." She cast her eyes through the stables once more. Silas had finished with his horse and had left, leaving just the two of them here. She'd spent the afternoon checking on her allies, and with Hinoka and Silas done that just left…

"You wouldn't happen to know where Takumi is, would you?" Corrin asked as they left the stables. She shaded her eyes from the biting sun until they adjusted to the onslaught of light.

Hinoka glanced across the courtyard. "He's usually training in the archery range at this time."

"That's what I thought, too, but Setsuna's training Mozu in there."

If you could call that training…

Last she saw, Setsuna was sprawled on her back on the floor, staring at the clouds listing by. At least Mozu was working hard, nocking arrow after arrow despite her poor beginners aim.

"Hmm… Hinata and Oboro should know where he is," Hinoka said. "But I haven't seen them in a while."

Corrin had met them earlier on, just after they'd finished patrolling the grounds.

She sighed. "He's probably on the other side of the walls again. I'll go have a look."

Hinoka nodded, giving her a wave. "All right. Don't stray too far!"

Corrin rolled her eyes with a smile. "I won't," she said, and made for the gates.

Surprisingly, it didn't take Corrin very long to locate Takumi beyond the walls. He stood in a large clearing, just shy of the perimeter of trees. A couple of targets were set up against the trees, their colourful rings spotted with arrows.

Takumi saw her as she approached, not attempting to silence the crunching of twigs and leaves beneath her feet. He let loose an arrow with calm precision.

"Still training?" Corrin noted. She rested against a broad trunk a few feet from him. "You should take it easy while we travel, at least. It's not like you're going to get any worse if you forgo training for one day."

Takumi pressed his lips hard together. "I'm not satisfied with my skill as it is," he said. "I still have ways to go if I'm going to get stronger."

Corrin breathed a laugh through her nose. The noise made Takumi knot his brow. "I think you're already very talented, Takumi. You're the best archer I know."

Takumi slumped his shoulders, dropping his stance. A faint dusting of pink showed on his cheeks at her compliments, though he furrowed his brow and turned to her with something stern in his eyes. The furrow lessened, blurring into concern that became serious. Corrin straightened, meeting his intense gaze in confusion.

"Takumi…?"

"That… that scar…" Takumi began, and Corrin's heart lurched until his eyes landed on her right hip. He wasn't asking about the rippled scar on her sternum. The scar, and only physical reminder, from that other time.

Takumi's eyes flicked up to hers, before dropping away instantly. "That's because of me, isn't it?"

Instinctively, Corrin's hand went to her hip. She snatched it back, forcing her fingers into a fist behind her back. "It's not–"

"Don't lie to me, Corrin," Takumi said, words curt and stern but his voice quavered. The words struggled to form, wishing it hadn't been so, that it hadn't been his hand that caused her to hurt. That cut so deeply it formed a scar.

"It was me, wasn't it?"

"Yes."

What else could she have said? How could she have denied it to his face after he asked – pleaded – for her not to lie to him? After her name quivered on his lips? Just admitting it to herself had bubbled fear inside her. She couldn't begin to imagine how Takumi felt, knowing he'd injured her in that altered state.

"It's fine, really–"

"How is it fine?" Takumi barked, turning his eyes from her as they darkened with pain, with regret. "How is any of this fine? How can you be so relaxed after what happened? Don't you realise that we barely got out of there alive?"

She blinked at him for the briefest moments before realising he was taking about what happened in Cyrkensia. "But we did get out of there," Corrin said, trying to lighten the tense air with a small smile. "It worked out in the end."

"We wouldn't have had any problems in the first place if you hadn't brought that piece of Nohrian trash with us." Takumi huffed deeply. The bow creaked in his hands as his fingers tightened around them, skin biting into wood, knuckles ghosting white.

"Hold on – you're blaming this on me?" Corrin's blood ran cold, ran from her face and coiled as a string of heat around her heart. A string of anger that only grew tighter.

"You insisted on him helping us. Insisted that he could be trusted!" He turned back to her, expression sour and eyes wrought with frustration and hot anger. "Bet Zola didn't think twice before selling us out to Garon. He wouldn't have had the chance if it weren't for you! We were so close. So close to ending this, and for what? To have it all ruined by a filthy Nohrian."

"You can't blame that on me!" Corrin gaped. White hot anger shot through her veins. The way he spat filthy Nohrian lit her blood in flames. "I wasn't the only one who trusted Zola! You could've died if he didn't save you!"

He could've died if it wasn't for Zola.

Not me.

Takumi barked an incredulous beat of laughter. "And how do you know that? He could've planned it all along. Maybe your brother was in on it too."

"Leo? You're bringing Leo into this?"

"Leo." Takumi repeated his name, disgust painted in the way it rolled of his tongue. "You're still that attached to them? Your Nohrian family?"

Now her blood was boiling. It shot to her face, burning across her cheeks, burning in her lungs. The disgust in his voice and face only added to the way her heart was pounding in her chest. It thundered loudly in her ears.

"And what if I am?" she asked back, teeth and hands clenched.

"Then how can we even trust you?"

"You don't trust me?"

A needle of fear stabbed her heart.

"After last night, I don't know." He turned from her, heated gaze dousing, deepening in thought, in confusion. "How can I, when it was your idea to bring that Nohrian mage on board in the first place?"

"I didn't know what would happen!"

Didn't I?

Her heart thumped, each beat freezing her blood.

"You could've guessed – any of us could've. But we trusted you." He swallowed tightly. "How quickly did I forget that you grew up with them? With the enemy."

Her breath stopped short in her throat. She tried to speak, to say something, to refute him, defend herself, defend her family, but her throat was tight. Dry.

It was hard to breathe.

"Takumi…"

He huffed tightly. Raised his bow. "Can't you see I'm busy? Some of us are actually trying to do what's best for Hoshido."

She couldn't breathe. "B-But–"

"Can you leave? I'm trying to train here."

He didn't look at her.

She left without looking back.

Have this little side chapter before I have to study for Uni tests 'n' stuff. Yay.

Thanks again for your reviews! You guys are super, super sweet!

Thanks to werehogdog, Raven Bishop, potatoman098 for your reviews, and Dragonna for your amazingly long review!

You all make me smile when I read them. Like little letters of joy. :)

So close to being reunited with Ryoma!

See you next chapter!