Resolutions

Chapter Fourteen

Ava sat in Derek's lap as he read her a story. Jess held Colton close as she looked out the big bay window. The snow was on a two day bender. Jess couldn't remember a winter that she felt more restless. Maybe it was because of the baby or because of Derek but getting on her horse and riding as fast and as far as she could sounded really good right now.

"Auntie Jess." Ava was beside her pulling on her sweater.

"What is it baby?"

"I'm hungry and Uncle Derek says he don't know what to feed little girls." Jess smiled and looked at him sitting on the sofa.

"Tell Uncle Derek he better learn if he's right about our baby being a girl." He laughed. "There's a sandwich in the fridge with some carrot sticks. We're going to grandma and grandpas in a few hours." Jess turned back to the window. Dylan was asleep and Colton was almost there. She couldn't shake whatever it was that was making her feel like she needed to run. Putting Colton in his basinet Jess went to the phone and dialed Sarah's cell phone. She picked up in four long rings.

"Jess, is everything okay?"

"Yeah. Are you in the car?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Pull over let me talk to Cody." There was quiet then Cody came on.

"What now Jess."

"Did you pull over?"

"Jess, I'm like six miles from home can't this wait?"

"Pull over Cody." He mumbled something and then he came back.

"I'm pulled over are you happy. Now what's wrong?"

"I don't know." She whispered. Cody knew by the tone in her voice she was shaking.

"The kids okay?"

"Yeah. They boys are napping and Ava's eating her lunch with Derek in the kitchen." Jess sat down. The morning sickness she suffered this morning was treating to return.

"Take a deep breath Jess and tell me why you called."

"I was feeling restless."

"Getting cold feet?"

"No. I just felt like I needed to run. It was strange."

"We can discuss it when I get home. Sarah can check you out." Cody looked ahead of them. "Jess let me call you back." He hung up. "Sarah, is that what I think it is?"

"Smoke." Cody turned on his light bar, checked for traffic and pulled out. A half mile down the road there was a logging truck overturned. The car they had passed just before Jess called was pinned underneath along with a pick up truck. Cody picked up his radio.

"Ace to Ranger base."

"Frost Bite here Ace. I thought it was your day off?"

"So did I. Call the sheriff and order a full rescue team to highway fifty, a mile from Cold Creek Canyon Road. I have an over turned logging truck and two vehicles underneath. Unknown amount of people involved. Get White Eagle in the air and have him land at the overlook above the logging road."

"You got it Ace. Anything else?"

"Call my mom and tell her Sarah and I are going to be late for dinner."

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Jess was sitting on the coffee table when Derek came into the living room. She was pale and looked like she wasn't breathing right. He went to her.

"Jess?" She looked up.

"I'm okay." The phone rang and Jess hit the call button. "Sarah?"

"Yeah. Can you take the kids to mom and dads with you?"

"Why, what's wrong?" Jess started breathing heavy.

"A logging truck turned over ahead of us. Jess the car that Cody passed just before you called is pinned underneath." The phone fell from her hand as she got up and headed for the bathroom. Derek picked up the phone.

"Sarah?"

"I need to go help Cody. Take care of Jess. Take the kids to mom and dads for us will you. There's an accident on the highway. We might be awhile."

"Yeah, sure anything you need."

"Welcome to the family Derek." She whispered before she hung up. Taking the first responder bags Cody always kept in the truck she ran over to the truck and did the best she could to help the people trapped inside.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Three hour later Cody and Sarah dragged themselves back to their truck. Cody stored the bags in the back and made a mental note to restock them in the morning. He got in next to Sarah and leaned back and closed his eyes.

"Are we going to talk about this or is it going to be one of those things we just pretend didn't happen and go on from there."

"Sarah…"

"Cody we can't go on pretending." He opened his eyes and Sarah knew she was in for a fight. There was blue ice staring back at her.

"I can't explain what happened. Chalk one up for baby sisters gut instincts." Sarah looked at him.

"You think that's all it is?"

"And you don't? Sarah it's not the first time she had a bad feeling and it won't be the last. I would think you would be happy that she called or it could have been us under that pile of logs. I don't know about you but I like sitting here in the freezing cold fighting versus the alternative." Sarah looked down at the blood on her jeans.

"I'm tired and all I want is to take a shower and eat a piece of your mom's cherry pie. I don't want to fight Cody. I just want to get some kind of grip on what's going on with Jess." Cody looked out the window at the setting sun.

"We may never know. Just be glad whatever it is, it was working today." He put the truck in gear and pulled out on to the highway and headed home.

**-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Matt was in the kitchen getting plates to set the table when Cody and Sarah walked in freshly showered.

"Took you long enough?"

"The mall was a bitch." Cody grabbed a beer from the fridge. Sarah grabbed the plates from Matt knowing the brothers needed to talk.

"Did I ever tell you how much I like her?" Cody took a long drink of his beer.

"Hands off brother. She's mine."

"I got my hands full thank you." Matt looked at his little brother. He was tense. It had been a long time since he had seen Cody that way. "What happened?"

"It was horrible Matt. The blood. The little kids crying for their parents. It's been a long time since I had trouble stomaching a scene."

"It's when you stop being troubled at all that we have to start to worry." Cody looked at his brother.

"It was almost us under that cluster."

"What?"

"Jess called about two miles before the accident. She wanted to talk to me but only if I pulled over." He took another long drink from his beer. "It could have been Sarah and me under ten tons of logs and steel. I couldn't stop thinking about what would have happened if it had been us. I just had our will rewritten but it's still on my desk waiting for me to sign it and send it back to Lucas." He looked down at his boots. "It was just so eye opening." Looking up he saw Jess in the doorway. He set down his beer and she ran into his arms. She sobbed. "It's all good Jess. We're fine." She clung tight to the one person that had been there for her all her life. The one person she couldn't bare to loose.

"I…Cody." He held her for a long time. Matt got another beer for him and Cody and water for Jess. She pushed him away and looked at his face. He hadn't shaved after his shower and his five o'clock shadow made him look more like Jesse then she ever thought possible. "Next time I tell you to pull over I expect I will get 'whatever you say Jess' instead of 'damn hormones'" She ran her left hand over his cheek and punched his shoulder with her right.

"Damn it Jess that's twice today." Sarah walked in for the silver ware.

"Serves you right." She looked at her husband.

"Whose side are you on?"

"I learned along time ago there's no right or wrong in this family just a whole lot of grey. The sooner Derek learns that the better off he'll be." Grabbing the forks from the drawer Matt was holding open she turned and left. Matt watched her go.

"Have I told you lately how much I like that woman?" Cody turned and looked at him.

"You may have your chance with her if she doesn't start behaving herself." He turned back to Jess. "I don't know whatever made you call us this afternoon Jess but whatever it was thank you." He hugged her again. Leaning down he whispered in her ear. "You hit me again like that its game on baby sister." He patted her back, grabbed his beer and headed into the living room to find his kids. Jess smiled and wiped her tears. Matt handed her the water.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Sarah said I'm unbelievably healthy for the stress my brothers inflict on me." She smiled. "How about you?"

"I just want to know what happened today."

"It was weird. I haven't felt like that in a long time. Like the whole world was closing in on me."

"You felt that way before?"

"Twice." She boosted herself on the counter. Derek came in.

"Is it safe to come in?" Jess laughed.

"Enter at your own risk." He came and hugged her. She wrapped her arms around him, "I love you."

"I love you too." He kissed her then turned around and settled between her legs. "Did I interrupt something?"

"No, Jess was just going to tell me what happened today." Matt looked at her. Derek looked up.

"I kind of would like to know that too." She looked at them both. Taking a drink of her water and set it down.

"Just before I called Cody I felt like things were closing in on me. I wasn't sure why. I only felt that way twice before. When Cody left for boot camp and a few hours before we got the phone call he missed his check in and was in Afghanistan."

"Both times it had to do with Cody?" Matt asked. She nodded. "So you called him first?"

"Yeah. I figured whatever it was, it wasn't going to be good."

"Some days I think the two of you were twins." Matt took a long drink of his beer and offered one to Derek. He shook his head. "The High Mountain drama is getting thick around here little sister." Jess rolled her eyes in the way that was so Cody it was scary. Jesse came in the room.

"The three of you going to chit chat out here all night or can we eat dinner now that your brother decided to make an appearance?" He looked at Jess and Derek. "Girl get your ass off your mother's counter." Jesse grabbed a beer. Jess wrapped her legs and arms around Derek and he lifted her off and carried her to the noisy dining room and to the first family dinner the truly appreciated for a long, long time.

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Sarah sat on the bed and put lotion on her hand. It had been a long time since she put her nursing skills to the test. After Ava had been kidnapped by her ex right out of her daycare Sarah hadn't had the heart to go back to work full time. Then when she married Cody there was no doubt that she would stay home and be a mother to their children. Some days she missed it. But it was days like today when the rush came back to her that she regretted letting that part of her go. Cody came in and sat down on the edge of the bed and took off his watch.

"Both the boys sleeping?" She asked.

"Yeah. Colton had too much Auntie Jess time today. He kept looking for her to sing him to sleep." Cody would have never thought at six weeks old his sons would be so much like little people, with their likes and dislikes.

"Have you noticed he has that one smile he saves just for her?" Cody chuckled. He had noticed.

"Don't tell her that or it will go to her head." Cody got into bed and laid his head ageist the head board. "You made me proud today Sarah." He turned and looked at her. "We could use you on the team." Sarah laughed.

"You've seen me on skis Cody." He smiled. She was really an awful skier.

"You don't have to ski to be an emergency responder."

"I'll leave the hero stuff to the other Hawkes in the family. I like being just a mom right now." He shook his head.

"Your so more then that Sarah." He leaned and kissed her. "Don't ever think I don't know how much you do for us." Leaning back. "I'm sorry about today."

"Today wasn't the problem Cody. I don't care what's going on with Jess, she's your sister and I'm worried about her. This stress isn't good for her or the baby." Closing his eyes he knew she was right. How could he tell his sister who live for the rush that the rush would do more harm then good for awhile. Jess was a smart woman but her common sense went out the window sometimes. Cody and Matt had it leashed for awhile but lately it had broken loose again.

"Maybe when she takes the next few weeks off she'll like the way it feels and decide to take it easy till the baby comes."

"We are talking about Jess right?" Cody opened his eyes and looked at his wife. "The woman, who being threaded with treason, still went into the mountains of Afghanistan to pull your ass out of a hole with only your brother and her boyfriend for back up?" He knew she was right. It would take a doctor or their father to scare her into taking it easy. The father part he could handle. Maybe the doctor part too if he got to Shep in time. Rolling over he pulled his wife down on the bed.

"Can we quit talking about my sister?" He kissed her. "As much as I love talking about her in bed with you lying next to me there is a million other things I would like to be doing other then that." Sarah smiled.

"Well, feel free to change the subject." They spent the rest of the night doing nothing that had anything to do about anything other then each other.

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Matt stood watching the snow out the front window of Robin's house and drinking a cup of coffee. He hadn't meant to come here tonight. He had tons of work to do back at the station and Jen and her family were coming today. He also had to go get fitted for his tux for Friday. But in light of Cody's near death experience he knew he didn't want to spend the night alone.

"Do you ever sleep more then three hours at a time?" Robin came up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist.

"Not lately." He pulled her around to the front of him and held her close. "Somebody keeps waking me up." Matt kissed the top of her blond head.

"I didn't here any complaints." Matt smiled.

"And you never will." He kissed her. "I should head into work. I have to leave at ten to pick up dad and go get fitted for our tux's."

"You are going to look so hot. I'm going to have to fight the women off." Matt laughed.

"You carry a gun. Most woman find that intimidating enough to keep them away." Kissing her again. "Do you mind if I stay here while Jen's in town?" Robin looked surprised but flattered.

"My brother is coming on Wednesday but that's fine." He had forgotten that Daniel was coming to spend Christmas with his sister.

"I can stay at the station with Cutler."

"No, really, it's fine." He looked at her.

"Are you sure?" Kissing him she nodded.

"Yes now go get ready for work before I make you late again." He laughed and headed to the shower to get ready for one long day.

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"Jess." Derek knocked on the bathroom door. "How's it going in there?

"Do you really want to know?"

"Yeah, believe it or not."

"I may make it to fight another day." She opened the door. "Could you…" He handed her her toothbrush. "Thank you." She went to the sink and brushed her teeth.

"I have to meet your dad and Matt at ten to get fitted for my tux." Jess looked at him though the mirror.

"I can't wait to see you in it." He smiled.

"I kind of thought you liked what you saw without it." Jess laughed.

"I have no complaints. But something about a man in a tux is one of the sexiest things in the world." She turned and kissed him. "Last chance to change your mind. Once they measure your inseam your mine forever." Derek smiled.

"I think I can handle that." Jess laughed and turned to get into the shower. She dropped her robe.

"Or die trying." She laughed and Derek took his second shower of the morning.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*--*

Jess sat at the front desk and scribbled some things on a sheet of paper in front of her. She heard the front door open and Cody shaking the snow off his head. He turned to hang his jacket up.

"What are you doing here?" He walked to the desk.

"Matt, Dad and Derek needed to get fitted for their tuxes so I thought I'd hang out here for a few hours. Why aren't you with them?" He smiled and sat down across from her.

"The perks of having a wife with parents who like to throw benefits. I actually own my own tux. Matt's picking my vest and tie up. "

"They really like you don't they?"

"Better then the last man she married. You're not afraid of meeting Derek's mom and sisters are you?"

"I never really met parents before Cody. I mean Cutlers were bastards to him. The few guys in high school were your friends and we hung out at their houses but their parents were just there. In college parents weren't a concern. I never really dated in DC."

"You'll do just fine. I never heard a bad thing about you from the people you've met." He smiled. "Well there is Father Jonah." Jess threw a balled up piece of paper at her.

"Let's just face it I'm going to hell and he pushing the down button." She stood and filed some papers. "I just hop they don't totally hate me. I mean we're already going to be married when I meet them."

"Jess don't worry. Just stay away from talking about your fetish with blowing things up and torturing small defenseless animals and should all be good." If she was closer he would of gotten hit he knew it by the look on her face.

"Do you live to annoy me Cody?"

"Pretty much." He stood up. "That and having sex with my wife. What more is there in life?" He headed to the kitchen.

"You cuteness is going to ware off Hawkes."

"So is yours." He yelled back. Jess continued filling until the door opened again twenty minutes later. Her father came in.

"I leave your in charge of taking care of the groom and best man and you loose them. Daddy what am I going to do with you?" He glared at his daughter.

"You're a smart ass Jesse Lynn and one of these days it's going to get you into a heap of trouble." She looked at her dad.

"I hate to break it to you, it already has." She came from behind the desk and hugged him. "Everything go okay?"

"Yeah. Shelly at over at the tailors said if you change your mind you know where you can send Derek."

"Guess she's given up on you then huh daddy?" He smiled.

"How are you feeling today?" She sat on the edge of the desk.

"It's getting easier. Really, dad where did you leave Matt and Derek?"

"The garage. Matt needed to show Derek something with one of the sleds."

"He isn't. Daddy you were supposed to keep him out of there." Garcia had called her a few weeks back and they got to talking and Jess had asked her if there was something fun that they might do for Derek's call name. She had suggested 'Chocolate Thunder' and Jess couldn't say no.

"I'm kidding. They stopped at Matt's house for something. They should be here in a few minutes." The door opened and a young woman walked in. "Jen!" The woman turned and smiled and ran to Jesse.

"Jesse!" She hugged him and turned and hugged Jess. "I missed you guys."

"Where's the rest of the family?"

"The girls saw Matt down by his cabin and I couldn't stop them." Jesse smiled.

"I'm heading home anyway I'll stop and say hello. Jackie said we're all invited to the diner for dinner tonight so don't bother thinking about cooking."

"Thanks Jesse." Jen turned to Jess. "So where is this hot husband to be of yours? I called Sarah a couple of days ago and she had nothing but good to things to say about him."

"Did she now." Jess smiled. "Did she tell you I was pregnant?" Jen screamed and hugged her.

"No Jess, that's great." Cody came out to see what the commotion was about. "Cody!" Jen ran and hugged him.

"Hey Jen. How've been?"

"Good. How about you?"

"Not much sleep with the twins but we're getting by. Where's Blake and the girls?"

"Erin saw Matt and they went running down to his place. Blake went to supervise." Benji came in and brought a gust of wind with him.

"Jen, hey." He waved. "Jess Matt said he can't keep Derek busy all afternoon so you need to get down to his place."

"Okay. Come on Jen I'll let you meet my husband to be."

"I hope he isn't scared away from father hood when he sees my bunch." Jess grabbed her jacket.

"Nothing scares him." They walked down the road. "Cody had some contractor friends look at the lodge. It'll cost about seven thousand dollars to fix it." Jen looked sad. "If Blake can get a better price…"

"It's not that. I love coming here but the up keep on the lodge is getting pretty steep."

"Are you looking to sell it?" Jen smiled.

"I just can't justify the cost anymore. If we could get up here more it would be a good investment but with Blake's work and all the girls activities we just can't make it up here as much as I would like."

"If and when you want to sell please give me a call. I would like to buy it from you. Kind of like staying in the family and whenever you want to come up you could."

"Jess that's sweet but last year when they made the logging road they surveyed the land. It's worth a quarter of a million dollars." Jess smiled.

"Would it be to pretentious of me if I ask you if you'd take a check?" Jen stopped her.

"You have that kind of money?"

"My parents did." Jen didn't remember Jess's birth parents much but she remembered they were lawyers.

"Well you'll be my first phone call after I talk to Blake." They walked down the road. The three men were standing talking as the girls threw snow balls at each other. "I can't believe less then a hundred miles west there's not a chance of getting below sixty degrees for the next week and here the snow is waist deep."

"I know. You'll have to ask Cody how that works. He tries to tell me so if he's gone I can read the weather reports but I gave up a long time ago." Jess walked up behind Derek and hugged him. "Hey handsome. I heard the tailor liked your package." He turned and smiled.

"It was tempting but I told her you'd kick her ass if you knew." He kissed her. Matt and Jen were exchanging greetings then Jen turned to Derek.

"Derek Morgan, Jen Reynolds."

"Hi Jen. Jess has told me a lot about you." They shook hands. "You have some great kids." Jen smiled.

"Thanks. I hear congratulations are in order."

"Thanks. " Jess took Derek's hand.

"I hate to run but we have some wedding stuff to get done before our busy day tomorrow." She hugged Jen. "If you guys need anything just call my cell. I'm not working at all this week."

"Okay. Take care." Matt yelled for Derek and he turned. Matt threw a bag at him.

"See you guys at dinner." They waved. Derek wrapped his arm around Jess and they walked up to her jeep.

"What things do we have to do for the wedding?" Jess smiled.

"Believe it or not my family is driving me nuts." She kissed him. "Want to see something great?" He pulled her close.

"If it's the same great thing I saw this morning I would love to see more of that."

"You have years to enjoy that." She got in the driver's seat. Derek got in.

"Should I be scared?"

"Very." Jess drove west toward her destination. "Can I tell you I'm kind of scared about meeting your family." He looked at her.

"You shouldn't. They like you already." Jess laughed.

"They never met me."

"I've told them about you and sent pictures. Jess you don't have to worry. I swear they will love you." Jess pulled into an overlook and stopped the car, Emerald Bay was frozen and you could see the Lake Tahoe in all its winter glory. "Where are we?"

"Inspiration Point." Derek smiled.

"Really?"

"Really." Derek leaned over and kissed her.

"We should take advantage of that."

"Why do you think I brought you here?" She kissed him again. Jess let all the fear and tension leave her. This was her place away from everything. She wanted to share it with Derek. To let him know that he was part of her now. This moment was the first time Jess truly shared all of herself with another person. Not even Cody knew about her trips up here. Some days she would take hours and walk around the ridges and valleys looking for the peace she so desperately wanted and needed. She found that. Here with Derek Morgan.