He scared the shit out of me with the speed he drove at…
…while we were on the driveway of the mansion. But as he turned onto the main highway, he slowed down and drove normally.
"Isn't this a bit sedate for this car?" I asked, curiously.
Derek shrugged. "My driving instructor taught me to rein in my speed need."
I looked at him and he grinned.
He meant me. I had got him through his driving test when we were sixteen.
"Why have a fast car then?"
"I have my occasional silly moment, and it impresses people. It's part of brand Venturi. I'm expected to turn up at games and parties in a hot car with a hot babe."
I snorted. "Bad luck, Derek. Rep going down tonight."
He stared at me.
"Love life so lame you have to take your sister." I elaborated. "Maybe you should have taken Louisa in your car after all."
"She wishes." He said quietly as I got the unplanned double entendre in my statement.
We paused and then both of us laughed.
"What the hell do guys see in girls like her?" I found myself asking as the laughter died away.
"That's exactly it, Case. She's all vision. All image. What you see is what you get."
I looked out of the window at the darkening scene as it sped past.
"And you like that?" My voice was quiet.
"It's easy…uncomplicated." He replied.
"No annoying mothers with their opinions." I stated.
"No."
We were quiet for several minutes until it finally got to me and I reached forward to put on the radio. Derek had had a CD player fitted, which was rare these days and it was that which I switched to On and pressed Random.
An electronic sound started low and wound up, then guitar and drum beats, and finally an electric keyboard cut in. I recognised the track. Muse's 'Uprising'.
"Seriously, D?" I asked in astonishment. "Still???!"
He chuckled. "Still one of the best."
"Is this the compilation CD that we…?"
"Yup. The same one. The case is in the glove compartment."
"With…?"
"Yeah. With your annotations."
"Shit!" I laughed. "That's…unexpected."
He chuckled. "Do you listen to the other copy?"
I bit my lip and nodded, a wry smile forcing itself onto my face.
"There you go then." He said, his eyes flicking between mine and the road.
We sang along for a while and then the track ended and then 'Resistance' started.
"Oh." I said, quietly. "I used to listen to this a lot."
"After…?" he asked.
I nodded.
"Me too."
We listened to the track and I tried not to think about the words.
.
"Do you hate me?" I wasn't sure why I was asking, but I needed to know.
"Not anymore." Derek said, surprising me. His eyes were firmly on the road ahead. "I did for a while several years back, during a really dark spell." He glanced at me suddenly a massive grin on his face. "You do realise you drove me to therapy?"
My mouth dropped open. "You…on a couch?" My voice was total disbelief.
He nodded. "Well, you and a load of other shit."
"The drinking?"
"Yeah. I blew up at Nora and Dad when I was visiting one time and in desperation Dad called Paul Greeby. We talked for four fucking hours and then he got me into rehab – discreetly. We told the press it was groin strain."
I sniggered…which was unfair.
I apologised.
"No. I laugh at it too now…the groin strain."
"The drinking was my fault?"
Derek leaned his elbow on the car door and rested his head on his hand while he drove.
"I never needed an excuse to drink Casey. Even when I was a teenager, I'm sure you suspected that. But, what happened with us…it didn't help, although a load of shit with injuries and hazing was the real cause."
"Hazing?"
"I was still at college for some of it."
"Oh."
This had happened while we were living near each other and he didn't come to me for help? That hurt. He might not have been my boyfriend anymore, but I was his step-sister and his friend, and I had cared. I corrected myself; still cared.
I closed my eyes as tears threatened.
"If you had been there, maybe it would have made a difference, but don't blame yourself, princess." Derek said softly, as if reading my thoughts. "If you had been around, I'd have probably screwed it all up anyway. Maybe us ending would have been my fault."
The music switched to Exogenesis Part Three and we lapsed into silence.
"Will you be okay in the club?" The thought suddenly occurred to me. Alcohol and nightclubs.
He straightened in his seat.
"Yeah. Personally, I've always found it one of the easier places to be around alcohol. People understand if you don't have a drink in your hand and the bar is always well away from the dance floor." He chuckled. "I dance a lot these days."
"If it gets too much, you tell me and we'll go."
His head turned quickly so that he could look at me. After a second, he turned back to the road.
"I saw you got Elisabeth to take the alcohol out of the house. Thanks. Social situations like that…they're the hardest. Because people press you so much and you don't want to offend, but you can't tell them."
"Why did you tell me?"
"You beat it out of me, remember?"
I sighed. "We bring out the worst in each other." Then I narrowed my eyes to look at him. "Why, if you don't hate me, have you been treating me so badly for the last few weeks?"
"Casey, Casey, Casey. Because it isn't fun unless I'm getting under your skin. I'm the constant itch you need to scratch."
I glared at him and he smirked. Then his face became serious.
"It isn't hate. It's just…" His voice faded away.
"I know. I'm sorry."
"Will you quit saying sorry? It's done. Over. Finito. Endet We've both moved on. We were young. No harm…" He said the last part quietly, but without conviction. I wondered if he was thinking about Marti.
"We need to try and pull some sort of accommodation together, Derek. Marti and Simon need to get married."
"I know. But she can accept his proposal now, we would both turn up for the wedding." he grinned.
"Except Marti has moved the goal posts."
"Oh? How?"
I couldn't say it.
"I think you need to ask Marti about that."
Derek glanced at me. "What's she after? Wedding bells for us?" he joked. Then he spotted the look on my face. "You are kidding me?"
I shook my head. He laughed.
"I'll talk to her."
"Good. Because I love Simon and she shouldn't be doing this to him. It's not fair and it's not normal."
"This is Marti we're talking about." Derek said.
He had a point.
The rest of the journey passed quickly. We talked about neutral things, common places and the people we loved. We talked about how mom was struggling with the stairs and how perhaps before long they should be thinking about moving to a one-storey house. I couldn't help but exclaim that my mom was too young for this.
As we talked I realised that Derek cared a lot about my mom, despite everything. He had lost his own mom, Abby about seven years ago from a brain haemorrhage. And whilst he decried Nora's interference in our situation, he told me he had gone to her several times for advice. When I looked puzzled, he scratched his nose and sighed.
"Nora's advice is normally good. Even if it isn't what you want to hear. And over time I realised it wasn't what she said so much that she knew how to word it in a way that would guarantee you listening to her."
Silence again.
"Can we be friends please?" I asked suddenly. "I lost a friend as well as a boyfriend when I…"
"Dumped me?" But he was smiling. "Friends..." he pondered. I waited while he thought.
"I'll tell you what…" He said, and I noticed he had flicked the turning signal and was pulling off the highway into a rest stop. He pulled into a parking space and got out. My door was open in a second, Derek standing there.
"What?" I prompted.
"You drive, and I'll consider it." He waved the keys at me.
My jaw dropped.
"You want me to drive your car?"
He nodded.
"It's an Aston Martin, Derek."
"Really? I bought a Toyota…"
"How much is it worth?"
"The car?" He rubbed his chin and told me.
Fucking hell!
"What if I ding it?"
"I'm insured, and so are you…universal insurance." He leaned against the body work while I looked up at him. "Go on McDonald. Live a little…"
I gazed at him for several moments.
He wanted me to drive his babe-magnet?
I looked at the sleek, gun-metal grey car with its bucket leather seats that girls would drop their panties for. (That girls probably had dropped their panties for…urgh! Please not where I was sitting!)
Then I looked up at my ex-boyfriend who was standing there waving a very expensive set of car keys at me, with a massive grin on his face. I looked into his deep brown eyes and I realised something.
This was Derek.
.
He was calling me out on this.
.
He thought I'd fold.
.
Like Hell I would!
I straightened, snatched the keys from his grasp and was round the other side of the car before he could blink. Yanking open the door, I slid into the driver's seat, closed the door again and strapped myself in. I removed the Random button on the CD settings and looked up at Derek through the car. He was still standing outside staring into the space where I had been standing.
"Are you coming or what?"
He slid carefully into the passenger seat and shut the door.
.
He didn't look very happy.
.
"Buckle Up!" I ordered as I started the engine, my feet feeling the purring through the pedals. I selected Track 1 on the Muse compilation CD I had burnt for Derek fifteen years ago, and as I screeched backwards out of the parking space, the intro to Muse's 'Super-massive Black Holes' kicked in.
Derek, correctly restrained and clinging to the dashboard for dear life, didn't breathe again until I hit the highway – doing 80mph. It was a Saturday night and the roads weren't particularly full, I checked my mirrors for police cars and put my foot on the gas. I weaved in and out of the few cars I came across until I got to open road.
When I allowed myself to glance at Derek, he looked a bit green.
"Jesus Casey! Where'd you learn to drive like that?" He spat out eventually.
I grinned broadly.
"Ed. He bought us practice sessions on an Indy500 track every Christmas for the last four years."
AN:
Firstly, Sorry about the constant Muse references. However, GET the lyrics to Resistance, below!….
The Resistance Lyrics
Is your secret safe tonight?
And are we out of sight?
Or will our world come tumbling down?
Will they find our hiding place?
Is this our last embrace?
Or will the walls start caving in?
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
But it should've been right
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
Let our hearts ignite
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
Are we digging a hole?
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
This is outta control
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
It could never last
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
Must erase it fast
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
But it could've been right
(It could be wrong, could be...)
Love is our resitance
They keep us apart and they won't stop breaking us down
And hold me, our lips must always be sealed
If we live our life in fear
I'll wait a thousand years
Just to see you smile again
Quell your prayers for love and peace
You'll wake the thought police
We can hide the truth inside
.com/the_resistance_lyrics_
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
But it should've been right
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
Let our hearts ignite
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
Are we digging a hole?
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
This is outta control
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
It could never last
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
Must erase it fast
(It could be wrong, could be wrong)
But it could've been right
(It could be wrong, could be...)
Love is our resistance!
They keep us apart and won't stop breaking us down
And hold me, our lips must always be sealed
The night has reached its end
We can't pretend
We must run
We must run
It's time to run
Take us away from here
Protect us from further harm
Resistance!
Secondly: The Subtitle to Muse's 'Exogenesis Part Three' is 'Redemption'.
There aren't many lyrics, but…
"Let's start over again
Why can't we start it over again?
Just let us start it over again
And we'll be good
This time we'll get it...
We'll get it right
It's our last chance to forgive ourselves".
Unbelievable album!