Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer not me.
Author/Note 1: This one-shot follows what happens during chapters 39, 40 and 41 of Our Dawn 2.
A/Note 2: I'm not a native English speaker so I'm sorry for my grammar and spelling. Thank you for reading.
Our Dawn Series Specials
Episode Fourteen – Double Trouble
Jacob Black
"Are you absolutely sure?" I asked Carlisle. The vampire doctor looked at me suspiciously due to my insistence.
"I'm sure." He said calmly. "Is there anything you want to tell me?" Carlisle couldn't read minds but he had probably picked up some sort of sixth sense that told him when people were lying.
"No."
"You want me to believe that you requested me to analyse Leah's last week ultrasound three times to see if there was something unusual with the baby for no reason at all?"
"I'm just worried, that's all." I lied. Fortunately Edward was driving his silver Volvo while I was travelling along with Carlisle and Esme, so I could lie all I wanted without the fear of being caught.
"Worried about what exactly?"
"Leah's been having... dreams..."
"You have to be more specific."
"She's having dreams about giving birth to a litter and… I thought it was best to be sure."
"I'm pretty sure she's not expecting a litter." Carlisle laughed.
"Not even twins?"
"No. I counted two legs, two arms, one head… It's one little boy… Just one."
I sighed in relief. If Leah had twins or triplets I wouldn't mind. It would be harder for us to cope in the future but I wouldn't mind at all. However, I was still a bit worried about what Odessa Clearview had told us about my great-grandmother's prophecy. I knew better than to ignore old legends and prophecies.
I could still remember the day I had first phased. One moment I was an ordinary teenager and the other I was a giant wolf chasing and killing vampires. First Sam, then the tribal Council, told me about the legends of the Cold Ones and tried to explain what the pack was supposed to do, but their explanations didn't seem to make sense at all. For me the only thing that mattered was that I had been unwillingly put through something I couldn't even comprehend.
All of my dreams of a future outside the Reservation were gone. I felt like a puppet in the hands of some cruel god.
I knew for sure that any child Leah and I conceived would have the wolf gene. How would they not? Being the children of two wolves? But that didn't mean I was happy with it. Actually I would rather spare Harry of a fate like mine. I wanted him to be safe and have the normal and quiet life that Leah and I never had. I didn't want Harry to deal with vampires and carry the responsibility and the fate of our tribe on his shoulders. Fortunately Martha Young's prophecy didn't seem to apply to Harry, because it spoke of twins.
"So... Can you tell me more about this trip to Alaska?" I asked Doctor Cullen and his wife.
"It's about Irina." Carlisle said. I knew that already. Bella had called me last night and asked me to come to Dawson as soon as possible. She never said the reason for the urgency and I assumed it was about Leah's pregnancy so I left La Push at dawn and reached their mansion a few hours later. But it was about the Denali instead.
"What about her?"
"She went home last week." Carlisle announced.
"And we're heading over for a visit?" I was surprised to say the least. We were talking about a crazy vampire who had tried to kill me and after failing had brought an army of Italian bloodsuckers to La Push to eradicate our kind. "You think she's going to pat me on the back and hug me?"
Carlisle looked at me but didn't say a word.
"Yes, I was being ironic." I conceded. "Irina almost killed me! She is responsible for Bella's transformation! She attacked Seth and Leah! She told the Volturi about our agreement! Why the fuck are we going to her place?"
"Tanya called us. She's worried about her sister." Esme confessed.
"I'm worried about the violence in Africa and you don't see me rushing there, do you?"
"She won't harm you. Edward, Jasper and Bella won't allow it."
"I'm not afraid of Irina. I just can't understand why you are taking me there."
"She's been mentioning the wolves of La Push since she arrived, but Tanya promised she doesn't want revenge anymore."
What could that obsessive blonde bitch want from us? Forgiveness? Was she delusional?
"Bella should've told me why we were coming." I said.
"Would you have come?" Esme asked.
"No." She had a point.
"Exactly."
Bella had turned into a cunning vampire. It was quite infuriating. Because of her, I had left my pregnant girlfriend home alone. It would take me more than two hours to get back, which meant that today I was going to spend about five or six hours without her and our baby. My wolf wasn't pleased.
"Stop the damn car. I want to go back." I ordered.
"We're here." Carlisle announced and indeed the car stopped. Behind us, Emmett's greenish jeep stopped too and then Alice's yellow Porsche. Bella and her husband were already waiting for the rest of us to join them.
"We have to keep going on foot." Edward said.
"Where the hell are we?" I hadn't been paying much attention to where we were going all I knew was that we were in Alaska.
"A tourist trailer park." Alice answered.
"And where are the trailers?" I questioned.
"Behind those trees." She pointed north. "We leave the cars here."
"Why didn't you tell me the truth?" I asked, following Bella into the woods.
"Because you wouldn't have come."
"Of course I wouldn't." I said. "Even if she doesn't want me dead anymore, what makes you think I want to help her?"
"She… she's important to them." Bella was talking about the Cullens. I knew they were old friends with the Denali's coven. "Besides it would be good to have a good relationship with the Denalis. They're vegetarian like us and..."
"We don't want to be friends with them. I agreed not to torn them apart unless provoked and they accepted not to step on our lands… It's a simple agreement that pleases both sides. Why should we become friends with one more coven?"
"Because they're our friends too?" Bella tried.
I pulled her by the arm so we could talk more privately.
"I'm friends with the Cullens because of you." I said. "Before you joined this family of freaks I wanted nothing to do with them. They were our enemies and we respected an agreement celebrated by my great-grandfather and Doctor Cullen. That was all."
"I know that Jake. But things have changed. You changed… I changed…"
I knew she was right but I didn't want to admit it.
"You don't have a good relationship with Rose, we all know that, but don't see us as your enemies. Edward told me. You all enjoy our company. We're friends either you want to admit it or not."
"That doesn't give you the right to lie to me and bring me here!"
"Come on Jake. It's no big deal. You'll be safe. We just need to know what's wrong with Irina."
"I was supposed to be with Leah."
"You've been with Leah ever since you got back to La Push. You practically live together. Is it so hard to spend a day without her?"
"Yes."
Bella rolled her eyes.
"You used to call Edward a stalker and now look at you."
"It happens that Leah is expecting my first born son."
"You and Leah are two different people. You can still think for yourself, can't you? Or Leah does that for you now?"
"You're acting like a child."
"I miss my old friend. I miss the old Jake."
Without noticing we had kept walking and we had finally reached a stony path that led to a house, partially hidden by an old barn.
"Something's not right." Edward said suddenly. I had expected him to interrupt our conversation but Edward didn't seem interested. He looked worried though. And so did Alice.
"There's no one home." The pixie said.
"Great. In that case let's go home."
"They said they'd be here." Jasper looked at his wife.
"Maybe they went shopping." I suggested. "Or hunting… or both."
"Rosalie, Emmett go west, see if you can find their tracks." Edward asked. When Blondie and her husband were about to leave, we all saw the Denali clan coming out of the forest. First the brunette woman and her mate, then the blonde vampire women with Garrett, the asshole, closely behind. I was expecting to see Irina any minute but she never came.
As they joined us, I took a step back, not just because of the smell but for precaution. However the Denalis didn't seem to bother that I was there.
"She's gone. We can't find her anywhere." Tanya said with a worried expression. "I fear the worse for my sister, Carlisle."
"What do you mean?" Carlisle asked.
"She's been here for a week. At first things were fine. She came home and told us she was sorry for what she had done. She said she regretted having involved the Volturi and that she never meant to bring your family any trouble."
"Yesterday you told us she was acting weird." Alice recalled.
"A couple of days ago she changed. It was as if she was closing herself to us. She was always in silence, she refused to hunt and locked herself in her room. We thought she was angry at Kate because she invited Garrett to live with us." Tanya explained.
"But then she started mumbling things about the Volturi and the wolves..." Kate said.
"You think she came to say goodbye." Edward stated, reading their thoughts. "You think she's going to kill herself."
I didn't know very well what I should feel about Irina. She had tried to kill me and my pack, but at the same time she had regretted her decision and had left us alone. Her family wasn't all so bad, except for Garrett who had tried to seduce Leah once. But if Irina wanted to die, I guess I didn't see any harm in that. She had lived long enough.
"Will you help us?" Kate asked the Cullens.
"I believe I know why Irina is doing this." Edward told them. "I felt the same once and I went to Italy to put an end on my misery."
"You think she's off to Volterra?" Bella asked. I noticed that the perspective of going there wasn't that appealing to her.
"Yes, I think she..." Edward never ended his sentence because the next thing we knew, Alice was making noises as if she was somehow suffocating. She clenched at her chest and then she opened her yellow eyes, glancing over at her brother and the Denalis. It was clear that Alice had a vision.
"She was going to Volterra just like Edward thought but then..." She hesitated.
"Then?" Tanya urged Alice on.
"Then she thought about how Laurent died... and she wants to die the same way."
Sam had killed Laurent. I had found the leech when he was about to kill Bella, he tried to run away and we chased him. He was unable to win against all five of us. Sam gave ghim the final blow, ripping his head off and then we burned his body.
"She's going to La Push." Alice finally said.
"Shit." I turned around but Bella caught my hand.
"Wait. We need a plan."
"She's going there to be killed, not to kill anyone." Bella recalled.
"What if she changes her mind?"
"How many wolves are patrolling?" Edward asked.
"Sam's pack is in charge today." I said. "I think Collin and Paul are the ones patrolling."
"Can you warn them?" Alice asked.
"I'm not their alpha anymore. I only have a connection with Sam because he's an alpha too."
"Please... don't kill our sister." Kate pleaded.
"If she poses a threat to my pack brothers, she will be killed." I assured.
"What if we can find her before that?" Tanya asked.
"If you find her and bring her home, we won't hurt her." I promised.
"You can't come with us." Edward said to the Denalis. "It's too dangerous. We can count on Jacob's help, but the other pack it's a whole different story."
"Leave this to us." Carlisle said. "We'll try to sort things out."
I phased when the Cullens left. They all shared a friendly hug with the Denalis before heading over to their cars. The women drove the vehicles back while the men decided to go with me. As I predicted I couldn't get in touch with anyone from Sam's pack.
As we went south, my fears increased and my mind was filled with horrible images of my friends being attacked just like I had once been.
"She's not going to hurt anyone. It's more likely that she's the one ending up hurt... or dead." Edward commented.
I knew that but there was still a strange feeling on the pit of my stomach.
"Relax wolf boy, we'll save the day." Emmett laughed behind me.
And then I felt it all at once. Pain, fear, a killing rage. I could see Irina standing there as if she was right in front of me though I knew I was seeing her through the eyes of another wolf. Her pale face and yellow eyes were glimmering under a weak sun that was coming through the branches of the lowest trees. She was empty of emotions unlike the wolf that was facing her.
I was still trying to understand which of my friends was facing the suicidal vampire woman when she launched herself against him. It was a poor attack because she landed backwards, her body hitting the ground with such violence I even heard the crack when her head hit the grass. Then she said something in a whisper and her head was pulled out of her body.
With Irina dead, the Denalis would want revenge and the never-ending circle of battles for lost mates and family members, would lead us to more bloody fights. Maybe Carlisle would be able to convince them we only did Irina a favour. She had come to us to die and we respected her wishes.
"Phase back Jacob!" Edward ordered. He knew what had happened to Irina since he could read my mind. "Phase back now!"
The four vampires had forced me to stop running and they were surrounding me. Jasper took a pair of green shorts from a bag he was carrying.
'We're almost there. We can talk about it when we reach the reservation.' I thought.
"Phase back!" He insisted.
I growled but I ended up phasing back although things were quite messy in La Push. Sam had just phased and was ordering Jared and Brady to light a fire and burn Irina's body. The last thing I felt when I phased back was three minds joining mine and a rush of pain coming from a wounded wolf.
"I think there's something wrong…" I said putting on the shorts Jasper handed me. "Someone's hurt."
"Listen to me." Edward came forward. "When we reach La Push you need to be focused."
"I am focused."
"You can't let your emotions take over."
"What the fuck are you talking about? Irina is already dead. If the Denalis come here for war, they'll have one. It's not up to me."
"This is not about the Denalis. Carlisle, you need to go to the Clearwater's house now."
After a brief exchange of looks with his adopted son, the doctor left immediately.
"What's wrong? Why did you send him to…" I hesitated. "What happened?"
"You know what happened…" Edward said. "You felt it…"
"A wolf is wounded but I didn't recognise who." I kicked a small stone away. "I should've been paying attention."
"Jasper…" Edward glanced over his brother and I felt myself calm down a bit.
"It was Seth, wasn't it? That's why you told Carlisle to go to his house." If Seth was hurt, Leah would freak out.
"It wasn't Seth." Edward assured me.
"Was it Embry?" I asked feeling confused. I was almost sure it wasn't Embry or Quil. The mind I had shared while I was phased was more familiar to me than Embry and Quil's. There was only one more wolf on my pack beside Seth, who apparently was fine. But she was at home, right?
"You know who it was." Edward whispered.
"Leah."
I don't know what kept me from phasing and running home to Leah. Probably Jasper. I felt the tremors and a piercing headache but I remained glued to the forest floor. Emmett and Jasper were also surprised.
"Are you sure?" Emmett asked his brother.
"Jacob was too focused on the battle. He was thinking about a way to spare Irina and avoid a confrontation with Tanya and her coven, so he didn't realise Leah was the one facing Irina." The mind reader explained.
"Is the shewolf okay?" Emmett inquired. There was a slight preoccupation patent in his voice.
"I believe Seth took her home. We'll know more as soon as we get there."
"Did Irina hurt her?" Jasper questioned.
"No. Leah ripped her head off, like Irina wanted her to do."
"That's a good thing, right?" I was able to catch my voice again.
"Yes. It's a good thing that Irina didn't hurt Leah but…"
"But what?" I practically yelled.
"You felt it too. You felt the pain… She wasn't supposed to phase until after the baby was born."
I couldn't believe I hadn't realised it sooner. I couldn't believe I had left Leah unprotected for so long. I couldn't believe I was going to lose her and Harry like that. I had never felt so damn useless in my whole life.
"It wasn't your fault."
"When Bella called me, I should've said no. Now Leah and Harry might die because I wasn't there to protect them."
"Carlisle will help." Emmett assured me. "He's a great doctor."
"We should go." Jasper announced.
"Is it safe?" Edward asked him. "Will he phase?"
"He's good."
They were talking about me as if I wasn't there.
"If we're taking you home, we need to be sure you won't phase. You can hurt someone." Edward explained.
I ignored him and took the lead. As we approached Forks and La Push I grew more anxious. Jasper had to use his powers on me again. All kind of doubts assaulted me. What if Leah lost Harry and blamed me? What if she died too? Would Carlisle be able to save her and my child?
"Focus, Jacob." Edward said.
I only realised we were in La Push when I saw Sam, Jared, Brady and Collin. They were outside of Leah's house. Brady was sitting down on the fence while the others were pacing around. Sam stopped when he saw me.
"She should've howled." He said. "I would've gone to her faster. When I reached her, she was already on the ground."
Edward shook his head to make him stop talking.
I walked inside the house with Emmett, Jasper and Edward following me closely behind. Esme, Bella, Rosalie and Alice were already there. Near the stairs were Quil, Embry and Paul. Sue, Rachel and Seth were coming down to join them.
I could hear Carlisle upstairs talking to Leah. If she was screaming like that, then maybe her situation wasn't so bad. However there was a strong metallic scent in the air which meant she was bleeding badly.
"Jake… I'm so glad you're here." Rachel was the first one to talk.
"How is she?" I asked trembling slightly.
"Having the baby." Sue replied.
"What?"
I thought she was hurt from phasing but I never realised she could be having the baby now. Carlisle was supposed to help her to heal not making a delivery.
"There was a rupture in her womb. There's no way to keep the baby inside any longer. Either he comes out or they die." Edward informed. He was probably reading his father's thoughts.
I reached for the wall for support and Seth put a hand on my shoulder. Upstairs Leah was screaming louder and Carlisle was telling her to push.
"Maybe you should go there." Quil suggested. "She might want to see you."
I nodded. No one stopped me as I went upstairs, step by step. I was afraid of what I would find inside that bedroom. Would Leah give birth to a dead baby? Was she going to bleed to death?
I didn't knock on the door. Even with superhuman hearing, Carlisle and Leah would not be able to listen to the knocks on the door. She was screaming again and Carlisle was too busy trying to help her. So I simply pushed the door open and walked inside. I was overwhelmed by the blood on the floor and around Leah. Her sheets and clothes were red instead of white.
I kneeled next to the bed and took her hand in mine. She was sweating and cursing.
"How are you doing?" I asked quietly when she stopped pushing.
"You are fucking kidding me, right?" She snarled. "I'm fucking dying in pain here while giving birth to your child and you have the nerve to ask me how I feel?"
"Okay… just do what Carlisle says, alright?"
"Do you think it's easy?" She squeezed my hand with such force she almost broke it.
"Leah… you're going to break my hand."
She just glared at me.
"Just a little bit more Leah… you're almost there." Carlisle instructed her. Leah cried and screamed and in the next moment there was a baby crying in the room. I felt my heart stop when Carlisle lifted the baby and wrapped him in a blue blanket. This was it. From this moment on I was someone else's father. I was a dad.
"You did an amazing job, congratulations." Said Carlisle smiling. "Harry is fine."
"You did it Leah." I kissed her forehead and then the doctor gave me my son. He was all red and crying but I guess that meant he had great lungs. He was probably smaller than a nine-month baby but he looked fine and healthy to me.
I was about to place Harry in Leah's arms when she screamed in agony.
"What's wrong?" I asked startled.
"This in unbelievable." The doctor said, examining Leah.
"Spit it out!" I demanded.
"We need to take her to the Hospital. I have to perform a c-section. She's having another baby…"
"What?" I blurted out in shock. Could this be possible? How the hell had Leah carried two babies and the ultrasounds only showed one?
"Another baby…" Leah mumbled. I guess she was as shocked as me. Maybe more.
Odessa Clearview had told me she was going to have twins. The old woman was right but now wasn't the time to think about prophecies and legends.
"It's a rare case of monozygotic twins. They grow in the womb in the exact same position. One of the babies was behind his brother and the ultrasound only showed the one in the front."
I didn't understand a fucking word the vampire doctor had said. All I wanted to know was if they were going to be okay.
"Rose." He called, opening the bedroom's door. "Prepare the car we need to go to the Hospital. Jacob, hand the baby over to Sue and follow us."
The next thing I knew I was in the hospital, in the waiting room. A nurse came to take Harry from Sue because he should be seen by a doctor. Now that she was Charlie's wife, Sue was known by practically everyone in Forks.
"That's my grandson in there Linda… take care good care of him, okay?"
"Don't worry Sue. We'll take good care of the little guy." The nurse disappeared with my son. One of my sons that is. If Carlisle managed to save the other baby, I'd have another child pretty soon.
"Everything will be fine Jake." Bella assured me but I didn't believe it would be that simple.
I spent the next hour pacing around in the waiting room. My friends came to give me hope and comfort but what really helped were the several cups of coffee that they brought along. Most of the Cullens waited for news outside the hospital because they didn't want to be recognised so in the end when Carlisle exited the Operation Room, there were only two more people beside me waiting: Seth and Sue.
Wearing a green suit, Carlisle smiled and joined us.
"A nurse is going to bring the baby in a few minutes." He announced.
"Is the baby okay?" I asked.
"He's fine now. He was not in the right position to come out that's why we had to operate. His umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck and he stopped breathing twice when we managed to bring him out. The doctors are watching him closely to see if he can be discharged."
"Will they be okay? I mean… they're only six months…" Sue questioned.
"They are small in size but all of their organs are formed. I think they'll be fine." Carlisle said. "Before going to the OR, Leah said she wanted the baby to be named after Billy."
Sue and Seth nodded and I fought the urge to cry.
"Nicole… bring William to meet his family." Carlisle opened the door behind him and a middle-age nurse walked inside carrying a small baby in her arms.
"He's beautiful." Sue said.
"And so small." Seth added.
And mine. I thought. We had twins. Harry and William just like our fathers.
"Do you want to hold your child?" The nurse asked but before I could answer she was already placing the baby in my arms.
William was very much like his twin brother only he didn't have blood in his body anymore and wasn't crying. He was sleeping when the nurse walked in but now that he was on my arms, he opened his eyes and looked at me.
Did he know I was his father? Did he know I loved him already?
"I'm sorry I never realised you were there as well." I whispered.
"William will spend the night here with his brother in the nursery, okay?" Nurse Nicole told us. "It's just a precaution."
I handed him back to her and Sue asked if she could go and see Harry. The nurse allowed her to go.
"How is Leah?" I asked when they were gone.
"She lost a lot of blood." Carlisle said, now with a serious expression. "She's alive. Since the doctors don't know that she's a wolf, they think she's not going to make it."
"Why?" Seth questioned.
"Because she lost too much blood and her bones and internal organs aren't completely functional right now. They will heal in time, but I don't know how long it will take. She's on life supporting machine because some of my colleagues think she'll crash eventually."
"Is she really okay?" I was worried. "If her organs aren't functioning… how will she survive?"
"She survived the c-section, so she will survive this as well. That's my medical opinion, of course, but…"
"But?" Seth and I said at the same time.
"I don't know when she'll start healing properly. During the procedure, Leah's body crashed because it focused on protecting the baby."
"What kind of complications is she dealing with?"
Carlisle looked at me for a couple of seconds before answering.
"Right now one of her kidneys isn't working and she has constant internal bleedings. Due to blood loss, her heart will probably fail a few times which will make her lungs collapse. Tomorrow I'll ask a few more exams so I'll be able to tell you more."
It was probably the worse medical diagnosis I had ever heard in my life. Even if she was a wolf, no one could actually assure me Leah would make it alive.
"I don't want to know more, I want to know if you can fix her like you fixed me when I was attacked by that newborn."
"It's not that easy." He admitted. "In your case, I just had to make sure your bones were in the right place to heal, in Leah's case it's not just the bones, it's everything: tissue, organs, everything needs repair and I can't just go into her room and open her up to put things in the right place. I did what I could in the operation room. Her womb was so severely wounded that I feared it would cause her death… so I tried to… arrange things so it could heal properly… the rest it's up to her. I hope her wolf genes are strong enough."
"So… She can die?"
"I don't think she'll die. But she might stay like this for a while. And even when she wakes up… she might not be the same person she was… physically and mentally."
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I don't remember crying this much not even when my mother died. Two days after giving birth Leah's heart had failed three times. The doctors, leaded by Carlisle, had managed to stabilize her.
All the exams Carlisle had done showed no improvements and despite the vampire doctor's words that she would get better, I could still see no light in the end of the tunnel. I hadn't left the hospital ever since. Leah needed me and I needed her. I couldn't go home until she got better.
The regular beeping sound coming from the machine let me know she was still unconscious. I wondered if she was dreaming of me and the babies. Seth, Sue and Emily used to come and see her in the morning. Embry, Quil and Rachel preferred to come in the afternoon. Nights were on me though. I was the only one who stayed with her at night.
Holding her hand always made me feel closer to her. It was in those moments that I let my tears run freely.
"Please wake up." I begged. "I need you so much. I need you to be here with me to take care of the babies. I need you to teach me how to be a father, Leah. I know you can do this, babe. I know you're strong."
I wiped my tears away when I heard someone walking inside the room.
"How are you doing Jake?" I recognized Embry's voice.
"I'm great."
"You need to come home." He said. I noted the sadness in his voice.
"She's going to wake up. I need to be here when she does."
"Doctor Cullen said she might only wake up in weeks, months… even years."
"I don't care. My place is here."
"Your place is with your family. They're worried about you and so am I. You've been here for too long. You don't eat or sleep…"
"It's only been two days Embry. I'm fine."
"It's been a week, Jacob. You lost track of time. You need to come with me before you fall from exhaustion."
"I left her once, Em… and look what happened. I can't leave her again."
"Then I'm sorry about this." Embry approached me and the next thing I knew I was on the cold floor and Embry was bent over me. "I'm doing this for your own good Jake."
It took me a while to recognize where I was. I didn't sleep in my own bed for quite a few weeks, probably more than a month actually, and the whole house reeked of Paul, since he had moved into my old place to live with my sister and my dad. That was the other reason that made me sleep more often at Leah's.
I also smelled the food placed on a tray on the top of my bedside table. My stomach growled, a clear sign that I should eat.
"How do you feel?" My sister Rachel, who was folding some of my clothes asked coming closer.
"My head hurts." I complained.
"Embry is sorry. He only did what we asked him to do. You must not blame him."
I tried to sit down but Rachel put a hand on my chest.
"Please Jake, eat something first." She begged. Her eyes were tearful. Usually Rachel was really strong. I had only seen her cry twice in her life. When our mother died and when Becca left La Push to go to Hawaii with her boyfriend.
"If I eat this will you let me go?"
"When you're strong enough, yes."
I sat down and started to eat my meal. It consisted in a cheese sandwich, fruit, juice and two slices of chocolate cake.
"You got us really worried Jake." She confessed, folding more clothes.
"I'm sorry." I said sincerely. It was never my intention to get my family worried about me.
"I met Leah that day…" She turned to me and sat down on a chair right beside my bed. "When you left to meet the Cullens, she left the house and went for a walk in First Beach. I tagged along because I wanted to speak to her."
"What about?"
"About me being a horrible friend. I apologised and told her I wanted us to be friends again."
"What did she say?"
"She forgave me." Rachel started to cry. "She… forgave me… and then I left her all alone and she was attacked by that vampire and…"
"It's okay, Rach… It's not your fault." I said while my sister was sobbing uncontrollably. "It wasn't your job to protect her, it was mine."
Rachel looked at me and wiped her tears away with the sleeve of her red blouse.
"It was not your fault either Jake."
I diverted my eyes from hers. Of course it was my fault. I was Leah's boyfriend, Leah's alpha and the father of her children. It was my job to be with her and make sure nothing happened.
"Is dad alright?" I asked.
"Alright? Jake… everything's a chaos since that day… You need to stay here and put yourself together, okay?"
That was not possible. I wanted to be with Leah. Even if she was asleep, I wanted to stay close to her. Hold her hand, feel her scent, hear her breathing.
"You can't keep me here." I said getting up. I stumbled a few steps and Rachel helped me to lie down again. "What did you give me?"
"It wasn't my idea but we need to make sure you stay here." Rachel whispered. I yawned and my eyes began to close. "Just remember that I love you little brother. Sweet dreams." I felt Rachel's lips on my forehead and then I blacked out. I didn't have sweet dreams though. I had the same nightmare I had been having since Irina had attacked Leah. I dreamed that Leah was fighting with Irina and I was there watching. I wanted to move and help Leah but I couldn't because an invisible force was chaining me to the ground. Then Leah was suddenly on the floor, bleeding and screaming. She was asking for help and calling my name over and over but there was nothing I could do.
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The sun was rising when I woke up. I could hear someone in the kitchen, probably making breakfast. Before I could get out of bed, Rachel walked in with a cup of coffee. I didn't take it.
"It's okay. I didn't put anything inside." She promised. "It's just coffee."
"I don't want it." I said stubbornly. All I wanted was new clothes and leave at once.
"There's someone here to see you." My sister announced. "I'm going to let her in."
I wasn't expecting to see Bella. She walked inside and smiled a little when she saw me.
"You looked better." She said.
"I'll take that as a compliment." I said. "Can you pass me my clothes? I need to get going."
"We need to talk."
"I'm not in the mood for your lectures."
"Look… I'm not going to pretend that I know what you've been going through. I've obviously underestimated your feelings for Leah, but right now I know that you can't go back to that hospital room." She stated.
"You don't get to tell me what to do."
"You feel guilty… We all do Jake. Not just us… everyone. Seth, Embry, Quil… your pack, remember them? Your father, your sister, Paul… Sam, Emily, Jared… Should I keep going? Do you remember your family and friends?"
"Shut up, Bella."
"You have a job to do here. You have a family and friends who need you. You have children who need to be with their father."
"I told you to shut up!"
"I won't shut up! Did you know the Denalis were here three days ago? Did you know we had to call Embry to meet them in your behalf? Did you know Sam wanted to reunite the packs and throw you out because you're not fit to lead? Do you know Seth faced Sam and they almost fought?"
"I don't care about the packs. All I care is about Leah and the babies."
"Really?" She asked and I noted the sarcasm in her voice. "If that's true why haven't you visited your children since they were born?"
"I'm going there today." That was probably a lie. I always meant to see the twins but every time I got inside the hospital I would go to Leah's room and I would stay there.
"They're not in the hospital anymore, Jake. They've been discharged. They were healthy enough to go home. Do you know who they're staying with? Do you even care about them?"
"Yes, Bella!" I yelled. "I care about them! They're mine! But I can't see them right now!"
I was afraid. I had failed their mother. How could I face them knowing that it was my fault they didn't have a mum to take care of them?
"Then you won't see them for a long time Jake."
"What do you mean?"
"Sue took them. She's taking care of the twins and doesn't even let your father visit. She went to the registry office and named them Harry and William Clearwater. The twins don't even have your name!"
"I'll sort things out, Bella. I just need more time to be with Leah."
"She's in a coma. She can't do a thing right now."
"I know!" I yelled again. "I know she's in a coma! I know she left me! I know I should've protected her!"
I sat down on the bed and the tears came again. I didn't want to cry in front of Bella but I was tired of keeping all of that sadness inside.
"Jake… I'm so sorry…" She sat beside me. "If we'd know Irina was coming here, we would've never asked you to meet us. We never meant for this to happen. You can't blame yourself for something that was out of your reach."
"I'm lost without her. I don't know what to do." I confessed. "She was supposed to have the baby when she reached the ninth month. It would be the most amazing day of our lives. Then we would come home and be a family. Just the three of us. But now… she's not here and I have two children and a damn family feud in my hands."
"That's why I'm here. I think I can help you with that."
"I'll talk to Sue."
"It won't make a difference. Sue is too upset to listen to anyone. She blames you for what happened to Leah and she obviously thinks you have no right to see the babies."
"But I'm their father."
"Legally, they don't have a father. I've seen their birth certificates, there's only Leah's name in it."
"If I talk to her, she has to listen to me."
"Don't be so sure. We're talking about Sue."
"What's your suggestion then? Kidnap the babies during the night?"
"No. Carlisle can provide a DNA test confirming you're the twins' father. With that paper you can request the custody of the babies for you or someone you trust. You'll be their legal guardian and as long as Leah is in a coma. If you do this, no one will take away your kids."
"I can't do that until I talk to Sue."
Right now I didn't mind that Sue was taking care of my children. I was in no condition to be the guardian of two newborns. She was their grandmother and she loved them, besides Sue had raised two kids of her own, she was not a rookie like me. I didn't even know how to change a diaper or feed them.
"If you're going to speak to her, don't go alone. If you go to her porch on your own she'll take Harry's old gun and she will shoot you."
I followed Bella's advice on that one because I knew I was dealing with one hell of a woman. Leah was a force of nature but Sue was ten times worse. So, after taking a shower and eating my breakfast, I took Rachel and dad with me and we headed over to the Clearwater's house. On the way dad told me about his argument with Sue. This was a family business after all.
Seth was the one who opened the door and despite the tired look on his face he seemed happy to see me. Unfortunately I couldn't say the same for Sue. She practically growled when she saw us.
"What the hell do you want Jacob?" She asked crossing her arms and frowning.
"Can we talk? Please?" I asked.
She allowed us to go into the kitchen. Seth offered us coffee and Rachel went to give him a hand. I had learned that Seth and my sister had a few heated arguments in the last few days too, but now they seemed to be getting along just fine.
"I want to thank you for taking care of my children." I wanted to make sure that Sue didn't see me as a threat. Unfortunately she wasn't in the mood to cooperate.
"Your children? Since when? You don't have children, Jacob. They're my Leah's babies… they don't have a father."
"I'm their father."
"You were, until the day you left Leah to run after Bella."
"I never ran after Bella. I went to see the Cullens because they said it was important and they needed my help. We have an agreement with them, remember? The Council wants us to respect that agreement, right?"
"When they were born, I went to you three times to inform you that the children were ready to go home and we needed to have their birth certificates before leaving the hospital. You ignored me… you ignored them… so I solved everything by myself."
"You had no right Sue." My father said. "Jacob was too worried about Leah to think clearly."
"I had every right Billy. Jacob isn't the only one worried about my daughter. But he is responsible for what happened and he is not fit to take care of two babies."
"I would help." Rachel offered. "We could all work together."
"Mum… they're Jacob's kids." Seth added. "Leah wouldn't approve this."
"You can't keep me from seeing them." I said.
"Watch me." Sue warned. "Look… I know you are their father, and I know you wish you could go back in time and change things but you can't. Right now you are in no condition and have no means to raise two newborn babies. My daughter is lying in a bed and when she wakes up… if she wakes up… she might even find you gone."
"Gone? What the hell do you mean? I'm going to stay by her side!" I stated.
"You might find your soul mate Jake. That's what I meant… and when that happens, these kids won't mean anything to you, or my daughter… I've seen it happening with the others, you won't be any different. They need someone to be here for them no matter what."
"I won't stop loving them…"
"But it won't be enough. Right now you need time to deal with the guilt and the pain. In a month or in a year… if Leah doesn't wake up, you'll move on. Where does that leave these babies?"
I couldn't provide her an answer.
"They're my grandsons Sue. I have the right to see them."
"We'll discuss visits when I forgive you for threatening to call the Social Services, Billy Black."
"I can work… Help you with money…" I offered.
"You're eighteen years old, you just finished high school, you don't have a job and you're an alpha." Sue put a hand on my shoulder. "We'll be fine. They'll have me, Charlie and Seth."
"So you won't let me see them?"
"I think it's best for now if you don't see them. Later on… if you still feel the same about them, maybe we can sort something out."
The conversation was over and I realised Bella was right. Sue blamed me and wouldn't accept me in the twins' lives for now, at least.
"Jake?" Seth called when we were leaving. "Wait in the backyard. I'll see you in ten minutes." He made sure Sue didn't hear him.
Rachel and dad went home and I followed Seth's instructions. Ten minutes later Charlie's patrol car came to pick up Sue. Then Seth called me inside again. He took me upstairs into Sue and Harry's old bedroom that was now the twins' room. It wasn't properly painted or decorated but all the things the Cullens had bought for Harry were in there. The twins were sleeping, sharing one crib because the other wasn't assembled yet.
"Charlie offered William's crib but we didn't have time to build it yet. Things are quite… confusing. They cry a lot during the night and since there are two of them… mum and I have to take shifts."
"How are you doing Seth?" I asked when I realised he was about to cry.
He simply shrugged.
"Have you been patrolling?"
"When I can…"
"You shouldn't. You need to study. It's your final year."
"Embry and Quil have been covering for me… Sam says if we can't cope as a pack, we should join him but we don't want to."
"I'm sorry I'm causing you trouble." I confessed.
Embry and Quil were securing patrols, Seth was practically raising my kids with Sue and my family was worried sick about me.
"Do you want to assemble the crib for Will?" Seth asked me and I nodded. At least this way I'd be able to do something for my kids. I read the instructions and the rest was quite easy.
"They look a lot like you." Seth said inspecting the crib to see if it was safe to place William there.
I held Harry and realised he was right. They were a copy of each other and miniatures of me. Their hair was black hair and their eyes were brown. I felt proud.
"But when they cry, they look like Leah." Seth added and we both laughed. "I miss my sister, Jake."
"I know… I miss her too."
"I want you to know that I don't blame you for what happened. I blame Irina."
"You're a good friend." I let him know. And it was true. Seth was a great friend, a brave protector, a good son, an awesome brother and he was proving to be an amazing uncle as well. "Do you think your mother will change her mind about letting me see the twins?"
"Not anytime soon. You know my mother… but I think she's kind of right…"
"You think I shouldn't be allowed to see my kids?"
"No. It's not that… It's just that… I'm afraid that Leah was right."
"Right about what?"
"What if fate is trying to tell you something?"
"I don't understand."
"My sister is not your imprint. Somehow she just happened to… get pregnant with your kids. As a wolf and since you're the alpha you're supposed to have children with your soul mate not with Leah. And fate found a way to punish her."
"Are you serious?"
"Leah thought so too. She told me she had a bad feeling about the delivery because fate could turn against her again. She was certain that she would die. And look what happened…"
"She's not dead and neither are the babies."
"She's in a coma and might stay like that for years… and the babies… my mum will make sure you won't get too attached to them. I think this is fate giving you a way out."
"I don't want a way out."
"I know you love my sister. I've seen it in your head and I was surprised when I realized you love her more than you ever loved Bella. But neither of them was your soul mate… Bella chose her path and the old spirits clearly don't want you and Leah to be together. If you stay with Harry and William, fate might punish them too."
"So I'm supposed to watch my kids growing up from afar?"
"If that means they'll be safe, yes."
"Will they know I'm their father?"
"That's up to my mother."
"Then I guess I already know the answer, after all their birth certificate doesn't even mention my name."
"I'm sorry Jake."
I kissed Harry in the head and then I held William and hugged him closely. They were my children. I wasn't going to let them go. I would have to make sure that Sue wouldn't be able to take them away from me. Even if I wasn't ready to be a father, Harry and William were mine.
xxxxxxxxxx
"Are you sure about this Jake?" Bella asked. We were at the Cullen's mansion, there were a few papers scattered all over the table in the living room. Edward was also present as well as a man named Arthur Anderson, a lawyer.
"I'm sure." I stated firmly and I signed the papers that Anderson had given me.
"As of this moment, the custody of Harrison and William Clearwater, grandsons of William Black Jr. and Sarah Wilde, and of Harrison Clearwater and Susan Uley, is legally transferred to Edward Cullen and Isabella Swan until the day one of their biological parents, Jacob Black and Leah Clearwater, decide to ask these legal rights for themselves. Do you understand what this means, Mr. Black?" Anderson asked me.
"I do."
"Do you have any questions?"
"Yes… What about changing their last name?"
"The request has been denied because Sue threatened to move a lawsuit against you and if you are involved in a lawsuit, the twins' custody papers might be revoked by the Court since you and Leah aren't legally married." He explained. "You can make a new request in four months. For now, Edward and Bella have the twins' custody and Sue can't oppose. That's what matters."
"Are you sure about that?" I insisted.
"The DNA test confirms you're the twins' father and you have the right to their custody while their mother is in the hospital."
"Okay."
Anderson shared a handshake with me and then left. In two days Sue would have to give the twins to Edward and Bella. It had been almost three weeks since Leah had the twins and I had decided to go away for a while. I had spent the last week in Leah's hospital room but even though she was stable, she wasn't making any progress.
I had finally realized I couldn't be there any longer. I had to accept that Leah could never wake up. La Push was full of old memories for me. I needed to clear my thoughts but I didn't want to leave my kids with Sue.
She was their grandmother and I wouldn't forbid her to see them but I wouldn't allow her to tell my kids in the future that their father had ran away like a coward. Edward and Bella would make sure they would know the truth.
"How long are you going to stay away?" Edward asked me when I was taking my bag to the Rabbit parked outside their property.
"I don't know." Sometimes I would tell myself it would be just for a few days, maybe two or three weeks. Other times I used to think about a year, maybe more. The truth was, I was lost. Really lost. I had no answers, no hopes, no future.
"Did you say goodbye to them?"
"Yes. Seth let me say goodbye last night while Sue was sleeping."
"Are you really sure about this?"
"You don't want them here?"
"Of course I want them here. Everyone wants them here. Rosalie is probably your biggest fan right now."
"Where is she by the way?"
"Off to buy more baby stuff. She won't stop until she empties all of the stores."
"At least she's happy."
"You could've given the custody to your sister or your father."
"I could but… you have better conditions to take care of them. My family doesn't have much money. My father's pension only covers his meds, Paul isn't working and Rachel's salary is not much.
"So that's the only reason you picked us? And I thought it was because I'm your best friend."
I laughed at his sarcasm. I had pick them because Sue could never enter in a court battle against the Cullens.
"And because Bella asked you…" Edward added after reading my mind.
"I trust her. When I come back I'm sure she'll give me the twins' custody if I ask her to."
"And with Carlisle nearby, the twins will have free medical care."
"Exactly." I agreed.
"Just make sure you come back, okay?"
"Missing me already?"
Edward gave me a sad smile.
"I hope you find whatever it is that you're looking for Jacob."
"So do I."
xxxxxxxxxx
I did not find what I was looking for. At least not outside La Push anyways. I visited a small town on the coast of Oregon that I didn't even bother to know the name. I stayed in a motel a couple of nights and then I went back to La Push, where I felt that I had left my soul.
I spend a whole day with my children. Bella and Edward went hunting but the other Cullens were in the house, making sure the kids were alright. And they were. Harry and William were being well taken care of. I knew I would have to thank Rosalie and Esme for that. Despite giving their custody to Bella, the blonde vampire and the Carlisle's wife were the ones who were delighted to spend time with the boys.
Carlisle told me that Sue almost had a fit when Edward and Bella showed her the papers of the twins' custody. She only gave them up when Bella said she would call the authorities. I figured if I showed up at Sue's door right now, she would certainly kill me.
The next day I left the Cullen's mansion and headed east. I was forced to make a stop in Cottonwood, Idaho. The Rabbit needed a new tyre and I spend three days in town. I had nothing to do and no one to talk to. I went to a coffee shop and spent a lot of hours in there. The waitress asked me if I was waiting for someone but I never replied. I dialled Leah's phone number and waited to hear her voice before the messages went to voice mail.
When Cottonwood became boring I went back home. Every time I reached La Push I would feel better but then after staying for a couple of hours I would feel as if I was suffocating. I didn't want to leave but I couldn't stay there without Leah by my side. Those were the worst times I had to endure. Phasing was also a problem because I could see Leah clearly in my memories. Sometimes it almost felt she was right next to me.
Somewhere along all of those trips and hours of immense confusion in my head, I would often find myself at First Beach, with a pack of beer next to me and with no recollection of what day it was or what I had done. Sometimes it was hard to find where I had parked the Rabbit.
That morning was cold and the sea was agitated. I woke up when the water reached my feet and I got up immediately. I knew I was drowning, not literally, of course. I was trying to understand what I was supposed to do with my life but things were just getting worse. There would be a day I would regret it. There would be a day everyone would look at me as if I were just a stupid old drunk who left his kids when they most needed.
I walked through the forest and found comfort on La Push's cemetery. I searched for my mother's grave and I sat on the floor. I needed someone to listen to me and if the living were too busy, I'd talk with the dead.
"I don't know where to start mum… I've been an idiot lately. I've let everyone down. I couldn't protect the woman I love. She's still in that hospital bed, fighting for her life. I left dad… but he has Rachel now. She's back and she married Paul Lahote. Yeah… I know it sucks, but he imprinted on her. I don't know what to do. I want to be able to move on, get my kids and give them the life they deserve but I don't think I can do it without Leah. I have no idea how I fell in love with her mum… but I know she's the one and I can't accept that this is it for us. Did you know we had twins? Two boys and they look like me although Seth says they have Leah's temper. You would love to meet them, mum. I just wish you could tell me what to do… I wish I could speak to Leah one last time."
I waited for an answer that never came, so I stood up, ready to leave and that's when I heard someone call my name.
"Jacob Black."
I turned around slowly and there she was.
"Leah?"
To be continued…
Special thanks: teamtorettosupporter, Blackwater Crazziii, Cracker679, TheSkeptic88, Jeakat, Tara Maria, Queen Leti, Firefly-class, MelkiSihou, brankel1, Kwop, MoliWood, rocklesson86, crystal, Weave the Magic, WEML101, Scimitar X, Guest, nene82743, Kary G, hgmsnoopy.
I'd also like to thank everyone who added this story to their favourite's list.
A/Note: This chapter was a bitch. I don't really know what it's like to give birth (I sure hope I never will, 'cause it sounds really painful), all I know is that I've covered almost all of Our Dawn 2, and I'll be finishing soon. One more chapter and the specials of Our Dawn 2 are over. Thanks for reading.