The First Time She Flirted With Him
When she went out on runs now, it was always with him. She didn't know for sure if he and Rick had worked that out between them, but she had a pretty good idea that was what had happened. For some reason, he seemed fixated on her not being out alone or without him. Sometimes, she would look up as she moved around camp to see him watching her intently, as though he were afraid that she was about to wander off and get herself killed the second she was out of his sight.
Probably he was worried that he would have to be the one to run in and save her in her stupidity. It had annoyed her at first. She had thought that he treated her that way because she was a woman. Before all of this, she doubted that he had seen many women with a weapon or had to count on one to watch his back in a fight. But she quickly realized that wasn't it. He didn't act the same around Beth or Maggie or Lori (certainly not Lori!).
Still, she hadn't understood his behavior. The first few times that she had noticed it, she wanted to stop what she was doing and yell across camp at him that she could take care of herself too, just like the others, that she wasn't a useless burden like he seemed to think.
But the more that they went out on runs together alone and the more times they were on watch alone together, she began to relax. When they were together, he didn't treat her like she was useless. He listened to her. She came to realize that he actually respected her, thought her capable, wanted her with him to guard his back.
It was especially apparent when they were out on runs. He didn't coddle her, didn't suggest that she wait alone by the bike while he scouted out in front. As long as she was close to him, he treated her like she thought he would have treated any other capable member of the group. And although she hadn't had any experience going out on runs with anyone else, she reckoned that they were a good team. They could move together without speaking. She seemed to understand what he planned without any words between them.
She finally realized that for whatever reason, he just seemed to prefer when she was close. So she accepted that and didn't question it. There were enough things to worry on nowadays.
Rick wanted to check out a little town they'd found on the map. It was far enough back from the interstate that it might not have seen much action. Might be deserted enough to spend a night or two and refill up on supplies. Rick decided the two of them should ride in on the bike and scout it out while the rest of the group waited hidden off the road. They would report back if it was safe, and the rest of the group could follow them in.
They got to the town and jumped off the bike. She followed him carefully as he led the way on foot through the streets. All was well until they had rounded a corner onto the main drag through the town. The street was flooded with Walkers, one of the biggest herds she had ever seen.
He backed up immediately, putting his arm around her waist to pull her around the corner. But as they tried to make it back to the bike, they saw that the herd had overtaken their path to retreat.
He reacted swiftly, stepping up to the nearest building and kicking in the door, pulling her with him before jamming the door closed again with his shoulder.
It was a little pizza parlor. Or had been at least. Cheesy Italian murals on the walls, checkered tablecloths, the works. Whoever had been there though had tried to make a last stand of some sort. All the tables were stacked up at the windows at the front. The windows themselves were blacked out with some sort of paint.
As soon as they were inside, he moved quickly, pulling one of the tables over to block the front door, then dragging another over to reinforce the barricade. She helped him, and they worked together without any need to talk. She could hear the herd moving outside, but the Walkers didn't seem to realize where they had gone.
Still, there were dozens of them outside. She could hear their groans and shuffles as they bumped into the door and dragged themselves along the street in front.
She wondered where the people who must have holed up inside would have gone. Or why they would have left this little safe place. But it quickly became apparent. There was no water, but more importantly, no food left inside. Whoever had been there must had been driven out of safety to search for something to survive on.
They were supposed to meet up with the group again at dusk to report. But clearly they weren't going to make the meet-up point tonight.
That was okay, the group had worked out contingency plans on top of contingency plans for just this type of situation. If they weren't back by dusk, the group was to find the safest shelter they could for the night, then wait for them again at the meeting place at dawn.
She settled in for a long night.
She got to work while he checked out the back to make sure it was secure too. She pulled out granola bars and a jar of peanut butter and bottles of water from her pack. She didn't want to weaken the barricade by moving one of the tables for them to eat on so she contented herself with pulling down one of the tablecloths and spreading it on the floor. She found a couple of those garish red candles these types of places seemed to love and lit them, setting them on the tablecloth on the floor. Who knows how long they'd be holed up here. She had to save the batteries from their flashlights for as long as possible.
She sat back on her heels to survey her work. Pretty nice, if she did say so herself. Kind of cheery actually. It would do for the night.
He had wandered back in, moving to double-check the doors and windows to make sure they were secure. "Well?" she called to his back to get his attention. "What do you think, nice, right?"
He looked back to see the tablecloth spread out, the food arranged, and the candles twinkling merrily.
"Yeah," he said absently over his shoulder as he continued to patrol the room, "Great. Real romantic."
She wondered if he realized what he had just said. He had. He froze, his back to her. She knew he didn't mean anything by it, of course. How could he. Just look at him and then just look at her. She wondered if he realized how valuable someone like him was in this world. All the stupid social trappings and pointless liberal arts education that had been so important before were nothing now. Only the strong would survive, and he was strong. Strong and capable and totally self-sufficient.
And frankly? Beautiful. She watched him all the time at camp without meaning to, without wanting to. Beneath the ever-present layer of dirt and scruff, he was so beautiful despite it all, or maybe because of it, that it always hurt a little to look at him.
She had a pretty good idea how this all was going to end up. Sooner or later, the group would stop running. They had to. They couldn't run forever. They'd find a place to settle down. And it was only inevitable that others would join them. Rick was cautious to the point of paranoia about other survivors, and so far, the group had avoided the other living like, well, like the plague.
But that could only last for so long. Sooner or later, their group would grow. And she could see very clearly what would happen. A man like him? As strong as he was? As important? And looking the way that he did? He'd find someone as beautiful and as strong as he was. And younger, obviously. It was only a matter of time.
But knowing all that didn't mean she didn't watch him whenever she could. Watching him made her happy somehow. Even though she knew that someone like him would never be watching someone like her. He was still her friend, and she hoped that he always would be, no matter what happened later on.
So she was determined that he shouldn't be embarrassed for what was only an offhand remark, after all.
She tried to make it easier for him, keep the mood light. "Yep, real romantic. A great place for a first date," she teased.
He turned finally and looked down at her. She smiled up at him, to show that she knew he hadn't meant anything by it. The moment still felt tense, awkward, so she picked up a bottle of water and waggled it at him. "Here, come on," she said, patting the tablecloth beside her. "Let's eat."
After they had eaten, they sat for awhile in silence. She was getting sleepy. It was time to turn in.
It didn't seem like there was really any need for one of them to stay up for watch. They were secure in here and just needed to wait out the night. But he seemed determined to wait up. He sat away from her against the wall with his bow in his hand, not meeting her eyes, fixated on checking each of the bolts.
She sighed. It would be useless to argue with him that they trade off watches (watches that weren't even necessary!). So she plumped up her pack to use as a pillow, and pulled one of the tablecloths over her as a blanket. It was horribly uncomfortable, but she would make do.
Then she heard him. "Come over here, if you want. Not goin' to get any sleep like that."
She rolled over to look at him curiously in the candlelight. He was still slouched against the wall, but staring over at her with what almost looked like concern. "Here, come on." He patted his leg, indicating that she should use it as a pillow. Well. This was a little strange. But she was touched by the gesture, and most of all, so very very tired. She decided not to overthink it. They were friends, right? She scooted across the floor and curled up next to him, gingerly resting her head against his leg.
She could feel the warmth of his leg through his jeans and smell the scent of his body. She laid there awkwardly wondering if she could possibly fall asleep like this. He must have felt as awkward as she did. He couldn't seem to figure out where to put his hands. She felt one hand lightly brush her head as he rearranged himself.
She tried to make it easier for him again. "Well, if I didn't know better, I would think you were trying to take advantage of me."
For a second, she thought she had gone too far. But then his breath came out in a huff, and she knew it was okay. She could hear the amusement in his voice as he ordered gruffly, "Stop. Go to sleep."
She closed her eyes.
She wasn't sure how much time had passed but suddenly she opened her eyes, disoriented. It was almost pitch black, only one last lit candle guttering softly on the tablecloth. Something had changed. It must have jolted her awake. Was she alone?
But no, she wasn't alone. She was still curled up, head still resting on his leg as he leaned up against the wall. He was still there, warm and solid, against her.
She glanced up without moving, but she couldn't see his face. He must have dozed off though. He didn't move, and his breathing was soft and deep. She realized suddenly what had been so strange and why she had woken up. His left hand was curled around the bow, but his right hand was resting warmly against her head, buried in her hair.
She closed her eyes again, content to drift back to sleep feeling his leg under her cheek and the heavy weight of his hand in her hair. It was okay. For now, they were safe. And together.